Contest #795 Summary

In this table, the “mean” means the empirically measured average
funniness score when the “unfunny”, “somewhat funny” and “funny”
receive a funniness score of 1, 2, 3 respectively. “Precison” is the
measures the uncertainity of the empirical mean estimation;
specifically, with 95% confidence the true funniness score lies in the
range [μ – σ, μ + σ] for a empirically measured mean μ and precision σ.

Rank Caption Mean Precision Total votes “Not funny” votes “Somewhat funny” votes “Funny” votes
0 His last words were “I hope this goes straight to her hips.” 1.8065 0.02023 1628 730 483 415
1 You mate it. We plate it. 1.7908 0.01443 3241 1503 913 825
2 I believe you’re familiar with tonight’s entrée. 1.7863 0.01349 3206 1350 1191 665
3 Well someone got lucky last night.” 1.7686 0.01521 2761 1275 850 636
4 I take it the Honeymoon is over? 1.7671 0.01747 1958 866 682 410
5 Your husband is ready for dinner. 1.7619 0.01712 2058 924 700 434
6 Perfect! It’s exactly what I was praying for. 1.7566 0.01595 2465 1146 773 546
7 If you can’t eat with the one you love, eat the one you’re with. 1.7522 0.01282 3971 1910 1135 926
8 Clearly, madam … you have good taste in men. 1.7487 0.01730 1986 902 681 403
9 Shall I serve your husband first, madame? 1.7461 0.01314 3615 1706 1123 786
10 I assume your husband will not be joining you. 1.7347 0.01564 2567 1236 776 555
11 I’m glad you ordered ahead. 1.7289 0.02507 937 437 317 183
12 I believe you are familiar with the special. 1.7284 0.01280 3534 1634 1226 674
13 From the makers of “A Bug’s Life” comes the sequel “Eat Prey, Love” 1.7262 0.01775 2009 986 587 436
14 It’s our honeymoon special. 1.7195 0.01740 1936 915 649 372
15 Yes madame, I am the head waiter. 1.7186 0.01579 2370 1127 783 460
16 Will Madame be dating anyone for dessert this evening? 1.7179 0.02745 780 370 260 150
17 Of course, I miss him, but a woman has to eat. 1.7173 0.01623 2246 1071 739 436
18 It is an honor to serve your husband 1.7160 0.01882 1623 762 560 301
19 Dinner is severed. 1.7046 0.02136 1300 634 416 250
20 Blind date went well, I see. 1.7042 0.01847 1734 845 557 332
21 Shall I pack the rest of your date in a to-go box? 1.7017 0.01654 2119 1024 703 392
22 Can I get you anyone else? 1.6989 0.01418 2856 1379 958 519
23 Revenge is served cold, madame. Post-coital decapitation is served with potatoes. 1.6947 0.01391 3243 1663 907 673
24 Lovingly prepared by our head chef. 1.6939 0.01433 2842 1397 918 527
25 I see your husband is joining you for dinner.” 1.6912 0.02328 1085 538 344 203
26 He would’ve wanted a nice service like this. 1.6883 0.01574 2316 1138 762 416
27 Sometimes I can’t help feeling all my relationships end the same way. 1.6858 0.01901 1550 754 529 267
28 My compliments to the head chef. 1.6817 0.01573 2391 1209 734 448
29 From our head chef. 1.6811 0.01520 2443 1203 816 424
30 I guess you get what you pray for. 1.6798 0.02070 1290 629 445 216
31 I do have great taste in men! 1.6791 0.01806 1714 842 580 292
32 Can I get you anyone else, madam? 1.6774 0.01545 2350 1160 788 402
33 I pray your latest husband will be to your taste. 1.6755 0.01604 2157 1062 733 362
34 The better half of your better half, Madame. 1.6749 0.01684 2030 1021 648 361
35 Will there be anyone else? 1.6725 0.01618 2119 1048 717 354
36 I asked to see the Headwaiter, not the head, waiter. 1.6715 0.01852 1711 875 523 313
37 The chef sends his compliments and asks if we may expect to see you again next mating season. 1.6695 0.02295 1059 528 353 178
38 I hope he tastes as good as he…well, you know 1.6612 0.02097 1272 644 415 213
39 The perfect choice for the femme fatale. 1.6585 0.01716 2237 1249 503 485
40 Uh, the website said, “order ahead”! 1.6579 0.01889 1561 793 509 259
41 I must admit, this is quite the courtship display. 1.6518 0.01822 2056 1184 404 468
42 And for Madame, Croak Monsieur. 1.6486 0.01812 1932 1071 469 392
43 I’ve never seen my husband so steamed! 1.6439 0.01982 1477 785 433 259
44 They say it’s to die for 1.6413 0.01998 1391 725 440 226
45 I have to say, other couples usually go to dinner first. 1.6409 0.02452 944 498 287 159
46 The first course after intercourse. 1.6348 0.01966 1539 841 419 279
47 He died happy… but you already knew that. 1.6336 0.01910 1632 894 442 296
48 Prey, Love, Eat 1.6317 0.02170 1401 815 287 299
49 Monsieur, Madame. 1.6310 0.02045 1469 822 367 280
50 It’s from the gentleman at the bar. 1.6306 0.02133 1416 814 311 291
51 I aways told him he was good enough to eat.” 1.6253 0.02093 1305 709 376 220
52 Just what you preyed for. 1.6228 0.02144 1291 718 342 231
53 I trust this will satisfy Madam…again. 1.6192 0.02594 738 377 265 96
54 Yes… That’s him. Thank you! 1.6182 0.02138 1265 699 350 216
55 He’s still hot. 1.6177 0.02128 1313 737 341 235
56 I trust your date was a success, madam. 1.6165 0.02816 644 335 221 88
57 Per your request, your husband is joining you as dinner. 1.6128 0.02115 1250 685 364 201
58 The entree is to die for. 1.6118 0.02241 1136 630 317 189
59 From the gentleman at the next table. 1.6113 0.02303 1132 645 282 205
60 Mr and Mrs Mantis celebrate the consummation of their marriage at the Four Seasons. 1.6108 0.02846 668 361 206 101
61 You’re husband has arrived for dinner. 1.6085 0.02251 1111 615 316 180
62 …and he already picked up the check. 1.6056 0.03118 535 286 174 75
63 He said to tell you it was worth it. 1.6055 0.02402 1024 584 260 180
64 Yes, I’m the head waiter. 1.6033 0.02458 983 564 245 174
65 The best part of date night! 1.6032 0.02419 945 523 274 148
66 I assume madam will be dining alone this evening? 1.6002 0.02352 1033 584 278 171
67 This is an entrée you may recognize. 1.6000 0.02326 935 498 313 124
68 It’s always nice to see a familiar face at dinner. 1.5983 0.02377 951 523 287 141
69 Yes! The perfect third date – sex, then dinner. 1.5983 0.02495 936 536 240 160
70 Would madam love to have anyone else for dinner? 1.5968 0.02605 744 398 248 98
71 The Monsieur,Madame. 1.5949 0.02455 943 536 253 154
72 Enjoy your dinner date. 1.5926 0.02600 950 577 183 190
73 OMG, I asked for his BREAD 1.5903 0.02624 842 487 213 142
74 Eat, pray, love… not necessarily in that order, mind you. 1.5881 0.02614 840 485 216 139
75 And will the rest of your husband be joining you? 1.5880 0.02552 886 513 225 148
76 He would have fallen asleep afterwards anyways… 1.5867 0.02547 859 490 234 135
77 You’ll have to take it back. That’s not my husband. 1.5864 0.02617 839 486 214 139
78 I assume Madame will be dining alone this evening. . . 1.5861 0.02569 836 475 232 129
79 My husband is finally on time for dinner. 1.5858 0.02584 857 496 220 141
80 I hope he’s a better appetizer than he was a lover. 1.5855 0.02516 854 484 243 127
81 He will be even better tonight than he was last night. 1.5839 0.02637 781 442 222 117
82 The usual, for madame. 1.5798 0.02739 714 404 206 104
83 And you must be the head waiter! 1.5797 0.02649 816 477 205 134
84 Just wanted to give you a “heads up” on the special tonight. 1.5790 0.02712 696 386 217 93
85 Your husband decided to join you for dinner after all 1.5761 0.02684 736 417 214 105
86 Ma’am, it is my pleasure to present the honeymoon special. 1.5746 0.02718 764 447 195 122
87 I see that madam will be dining alone this evening. 1.5744 0.02734 719 411 203 105
88 He wasn’t much in bed, but he did have a good head on his shoulders. 1.5739 0.02800 690 396 192 102
89 Please tell me that’s who I think it is. 1.5734 0.02780 654 364 205 85
90 Chef hopes that you didn’t bite off more than you can chew. 1.5721 0.02816 673 385 191 97
91 Will the lady be expecting anyone else? 1.5716 0.02766 684 388 201 95
92 I suggest you leave a bigger tip than he did. 1.5712 0.02871 632 358 187 87
93 You only get to enjoy dinner with your husband once in a lifetime. 1.5710 0.02816 697 406 184 107
94 I remind you that a small decapitation fee is applied when a guest brings and devours their own mate. 1.5692 0.02739 708 406 201 101
95 He was lucky to have you, Madam. 1.5691 0.02758 687 391 201 95
96 Bon appetit and my condolences for the loss of your husband. 1.5664 0.02745 655 365 209 81
97 Voila, the head of the family. 1.5663 0.02950 664 398 156 110
98 Can I bring you anyone else? 1.5633 0.02865 664 389 176 99
99 Enjoy monsier, madame. 1.5624 0.02901 665 395 166 104
100 He did mention it was the best sex of his life. 1.5613 0.02875 702 425 160 117
101 I sure hope I haven’t bitten off more than I can chew! 1.5604 0.02887 621 357 180 84
102 It’s strange, and confusing, but I actually wish he could have joined me tonight. 1.5595 0.03112 513 290 159 64
103 Ahh, he’s still smiling. 1.5591 0.02852 626 358 186 82
104 Your dinner is severed. 1.5556 0.03047 567 331 157 79
105 Yes! What I was preying for. 1.5548 0.02977 602 354 162 86
106 I trust you will continue to enjoy date night. 1.5482 0.02778 622 353 197 72
107 This is our favored after course, following the salad course and the intercourse. 1.5474 0.05036 190 108 60 22
108 I hope you’re enjoying your honeymoon. 1.5469 0.03223 501 295 138 68
109 Perfect: prey, love, eat. 1.5468 0.03132 598 372 125 101
110 Revenge served warm, Madame.” 1.5456 0.02889 614 360 173 81
111 The thorax at the bar sent this over… 1.5440 0.03317 511 313 118 80
112 His last words — “Tell her, from my perspective, it wasn’t worth it. 1.5438 0.03340 445 258 132 55
113 Ah yes, that’s him. 1.5438 0.03579 377 216 117 44
114 I take it you’ll no longer be needing separate checks. 1.5426 0.03258 516 313 126 77
115 check and mate… 1.5416 0.03196 541 330 129 82
116 So, this makes you the “head” waiter? 1.5413 0.03053 508 290 161 57
117 Madame, presenting our Pray, Love, Eat special. 1.5412 0.03195 534 324 131 79
118 This calls for a wine with more body. 1.5404 0.03224 544 336 122 86
119 Ahh, Pierre, I always get hungry after sex! 1.5403 0.03311 496 301 122 73
120 I guess you are what you eat. 1.5398 0.03122 515 302 148 65
121 Husband of the day on a bed of arugula, madam. 1.5393 0.02976 573 338 161 74
122 I had my fill of him last night. 1.5392 0.03355 497 306 114 77
123 Such a pleasure to be served by the head waiter! 1.5389 0.03160 488 283 147 58
124 Oh, that’s Bert: he was so tender. 1.5381 0.03489 407 238 119 50
125 His last words were..”Oh God yes!” 1.5380 0.03267 526 325 119 82
126 Pardon, madame, nature dictates that I serve your husband first. 1.5379 0.03241 515 313 127 75
127 You know, I used to just have a cigarette afterward. 1.5375 0.03040 560 339 144 77
128 Madam, we are pleased that you brought your husband to eat here. 1.5366 0.03206 505 302 135 68
129 This is so much more civilized than just biting it off. 1.5360 0.03295 472 281 129 62
130 Some like to cuddle, I like to nosh 1.5337 0.03383 416 241 128 47
131 Love Eat Pray 1.5336 0.03380 506 319 104 83
132 I ordered the tete de veau, not the tete de beau. 1.5327 0.03394 428 252 124 52
133 Ah, the perfect end to a wonderful first date. 1.5320 0.03371 485 300 112 73
134 Compliments of the gentlemantis at table 3.” 1.5320 0.03358 532 342 97 93
135 Happy Valentines Day,Madame,and thank you for ordering ahead. 1.5317 0.03144 521 313 139 69
136 Courtesy of the gentleman who was at the bar. 1.5315 0.03276 508 313 120 75
137 He was a great lover. Head and shoulders above the rest. 1.5304 0.03274 494 301 124 69
138 Our “Romantic Dinner Special” for one. 1.5300 0.03115 517 308 144 65
139 Here we serve the gentleman first. 1.5300 0.03209 534 331 123 80
140 Ma’am, your husband is ready for dinner. 1.5296 0.03287 506 313 118 75
141 Et voilà, ze ‘oneymoon special! 1.5280 0.03433 483 305 101 77
142 An extra special evening – sex and a meal with no commitment! 1.5268 0.03557 410 249 106 55
143 I told him it would be a tête-à-tête 1.5255 0.03356 432 256 125 51
144 Mate. Check? 1.5237 0.03371 443 267 120 56
145 Madame, for a pairing I suggest something full-bodied but not heady. 1.5231 0.03409 476 299 105 72
146 I love a one night stand that ends with dinner. 1.5220 0.03737 387 241 90 56
147 He told me to tell you the sex was great. 1.5219 0.03444 479 305 98 76
148 Et voila… le Croque Monsieur. 1.5218 0.03310 504 317 111 76
149 Bon appetit, and our condolences on your recent widowhood. 1.5201 0.03252 448 268 129 51
150 Would madame care for a cigarette, too? 1.5197 0.03360 458 281 116 61
151 Prepared by the head chef. 1.5196 0.03704 408 259 86 63
152 Madam will be dining alone, I assume? 1.5181 0.03475 469 300 95 74
153 Yum, the honeymoon’s over. 1.5181 0.03355 469 291 113 65
154 He could’ve just sent over a drink. 1.5177 0.03365 452 279 113 60
155 Please enjoy dinner with your husband. 1.5177 0.03331 481 300 113 68
156 An excellent choice madame…and he took care of the bill for you. 1.5171 0.03388 468 293 108 67
157 Is there anyone else I can bring you? 1.5168 0.03461 476 306 94 76
158 Yes, you get to enjoy him twice. 1.5165 0.03679 395 247 92 56
159 We saved you the trouble. 1.5155 0.03277 452 272 127 53
160 I warned him that I would have his head on a platter. 1.5147 0.03512 373 220 114 39
161 That’s not Leonard. 1.5144 0.03585 416 261 96 59
162 I see your mate is joining you for dinner 1.5143 0.03429 420 255 114 51
163 Compliments of the chef, madam. She says you have excellent taste in men. 1.5130 0.03411 423 257 115 51
164 I guess it’s true what they say, you are what you eat. 1.5128 0.03496 390 234 112 44
165 He said he’d just as soon skip the foreplay. 1.5109 0.03586 411 258 96 57
166 They don’t call me the head waiter for nothing. 1.5104 0.03656 431 281 80 70
167 Make him FEEL special, then make him THE special. Well played Madame. 1.5099 0.03670 406 259 87 60
168 Your Valentine’s Day usual, Madam. 1.5086 0.03515 409 253 104 52
169 Compliments of the gentleman previously standing at the bar. 1.5083 0.03585 421 268 92 61
170 Yes he’s fresh. You just had sex with him in the bathroom. 1.5079 0.03809 380 244 79 57
171 And for Madame,we have Monsieur. 1.5079 0.03661 380 236 95 49
172 Kenny wasn’t the first man-tis to lose his head over a pretty woman. 1.5070 0.03377 426 260 116 50
173 Guess it’s pretty obvious why I’m always dining alone. 1.5065 0.03699 385 243 89 53
174 This is courtesy of, and is, the gentleman from the bar.” 1.5056 0.03810 358 225 85 48
175 That’s not him. 1.5053 0.03788 378 242 81 55
176 He still has a smile on his face madam. 1.5051 0.03644 390 245 93 52
177 May I recommend a fresh red with a bitter finish? 1.5040 0.03683 377 236 92 49
178 Let me guess–you were the one who broke things off? 1.5028 0.03858 362 232 78 52
179 Yes, I was just promoted to head waiter. 1.5027 0.03671 376 235 93 48
180 He said it was good for him, and good luck with the kids. 1.5013 0.03619 391 246 94 51
181 Your husband has arrived. 1.5000 0.03852 340 213 84 43
182 Your Croaked Monsieur, Ma’am. 1.5000 0.03829 368 237 78 53
183 I understand Monsieur will not be joining you. 1.4987 0.03634 399 255 89 55
184 Your post-coital snack, madam. 1.4986 0.03692 357 221 94 42
185 For me, the first stage of grief is hunger. 1.4985 0.04045 331 214 69 48
186 I’m happy to see your husband is joining us for dinner” 1.4975 0.03468 400 247 107 46
187 And you’re sure he’s the one? 1.4971 0.03829 348 220 83 45
188 Will you be needing a body… sorry… a doggy bag for the rest of him? 1.4970 0.03823 338 211 86 41
189 Actually, revenge is a dish best served with kale and croutons. 1.4969 0.04081 320 206 69 45
190 It was his last request Madam! 1.4960 0.03451 373 224 113 36
191 Your mate, madam, well-done. 1.4959 0.03688 363 229 89 45
192 Let us prey. 1.4958 0.03641 361 223 97 41
193 I remember his last last words “over my dead body” 1.4958 0.03724 361 227 89 45
194 The chef sends his condolences 1.4958 0.03562 357 218 102 37
195 It appears that revenge is a dish best served warm. 1.4955 0.03802 335 208 88 39
196 The chef informed me you’re having your husband for dinner. 1.4952 0.03599 414 268 87 59
197 Would you like a body bag to take the rest home? 1.4944 0.03850 358 231 77 50
198 I take it you’ll be dining alone? 1.4941 0.03691 340 208 96 36
199 I’ve always been a “mate and potatoes” gal at heart 1.4915 0.03904 354 231 72 51
200 I assume madame will be dining alone? 1.4914 0.03854 350 225 78 47
201 May I say you have an excellent taste in men, Madame. 1.4894 0.03877 329 208 81 40
202 Prepared by the head chef himself. 1.4891 0.03506 413 264 96 53
203 It’s a special blend of Herb and spices. 1.4873 0.04014 353 237 60 56
204 Your après coitus, madam? 1.4869 0.03620 343 210 99 34
205 Shall I assume Madam is dining alone tonight? 1.4855 0.03734 346 218 88 40
206 You ordered the mate plate? 1.4829 0.04043 292 184 75 33
207 He didn’t look this good when I was dating him! 1.4826 0.03885 317 200 81 36
208 The gentleman who was seated in the back sent this with his thanks for an evening he will remember as long as he lived. 1.4819 0.04709 193 117 59 17
209 Would you like decap coffee with dessert? 1.4818 0.03907 303 189 82 32
210 Your husband I presume. 1.4817 0.03909 328 211 76 41
211 I believe you’ve met. 1.4815 0.05449 135 80 45 10
212 I suppose Madam is dining alone tonight? 1.4812 0.03933 320 205 76 39
213 Oh,not lover and onions again! 1.4812 0.04147 293 189 67 37
214 I hope it was good for Madam. 1.4808 0.03790 339 216 83 40
215 Rumor has it, you’re now eating for two. 1.4806 0.03732 310 189 93 28
216 Uh… I ordered the steamed aphids. And in any case, that’s not my husband. 1.4805 0.03832 308 193 83 32
217 Madame, revenge is a dish best served warm. 1.4804 0.03890 358 238 68 52
218 Ah, I see your husband will be joining you for dinner, after all. 1.4804 0.03975 331 217 69 45
219 The remainder of your party has arrived, Madam. 1.4795 0.03753 365 238 79 48
220 Oh, no!
I had that for lunch.
1.4789 0.03894 355 236 68 51
221 Shall I assume you two hit it off? 1.4785 0.03878 326 209 78 39
222 Ah, the Blue Mate special! 1.4778 0.04003 293 185 76 32
223 Well Madame, it seems your husband was able to make it for dinner after all. 1.4766 0.04093 321 214 61 46
224 You must be the head waiter. 1.4766 0.03877 342 224 73 45
225 I believe madame will remember her escort from last night? 1.4763 0.03798 338 217 81 40
226 His head on a platter, as you requested. 1.4757 0.03733 370 243 78 49
227 Madame, your afterglow, just the way you like it. 1.4757 0.04449 267 177 53 37
228 Would you like flies with that? 1.4756 0.04160 307 204 60 43
229 Did you want flies with that? 1.4756 0.04134 307 203 62 42
230 He told me to tell you it was worth it. 1.4756 0.04003 307 198 72 37
231 Perfect! My compliments to the head chef. 1.4755 0.04223 286 187 62 37
232 The sex was great, but this is what I was really was looking forward to! 1.4748 0.04074 318 211 63 44
233 I’m always hungry after sex. 1.4747 0.04044 316 208 66 42
234 Madame. Monsieur. 1.4737 0.04291 285 189 57 39
235 The other member of your party has arrived. 1.4734 0.03680 338 213 90 35
236 Oh my God!

I’m just like my mother!!

1.4731 0.04271 260 166 65 29
237 An amuse bouche from our head chef. 1.4731 0.03970 334 222 66 46
238 Compliments of your divorce attorney.” 1.4727 0.03842 330 213 78 39
239 Dear Henry would be so pleased with the presentation. 1.4723 0.03641 307 186 97 24
240 That’s Harriet’s ex. If she didn’t want it, why would I? 1.4716 0.04177 282 183 65 34
241 Don’t you just love first dates? 1.4691 0.04129 275 176 69 30
242 Second date, I presume? 1.4690 0.04177 290 191 62 37
243 After that roll in the hay, I’m famished! 1.4686 0.03898 318 206 75 37
244 After the ruckus at the other table, you did say “I’ll have what she’s having.” 1.4682 0.03998 299 193 72 34
245 Another eHarmony match ends successfully! 1.4678 0.04067 295 192 68 35
246 Your husband has arrived for dinner madam. 1.4678 0.04010 295 190 72 33
247 Compliments of the gentleman at the next table. 1.4673 0.03958 306 198 73 35
248 I trust the sex was to your satisfaction madam. 1.4671 0.04159 289 190 63 36
249 Gosh, perfectly executed. 1.4669 0.04030 272 171 75 26
250 The gentleman at the bar is dying to meet you. 1.4661 0.04489 251 166 53 32
251 Monsieur, is ready for you now. 1.4646 0.03784 297 185 86 26
252 I ordered wings. 1.4638 0.03976 304 198 71 35
253 Condolences on your loss, Madam, but bon appetit. 1.4638 0.03505 345 215 100 30
254 Freshly mated, of course. 1.4613 0.04031 284 183 71 30
255 That looks just like my first husband. 1.4613 0.04395 271 183 51 37
256 Bon appétit! from your head waiter. 1.4610 0.04113 282 184 66 32
257 Madam, your husband du jour. 1.4608 0.03873 306 197 77 32
258 You’ve got male 1.4593 0.04215 270 177 62 31
259 Cooked as you wished, although revenge is usually a dish best served cold. 1.4591 0.04245 281 188 57 36
260 Your husband is quite the dish. 1.4589 0.04037 292 191 68 33
261 You said you wanted his head on a platter, we added the potatoes.” 1.4589 0.03914 316 208 71 37
262 He once was a true love of mine 1.4583 0.04724 216 142 49 25
263 Let’s hope he’s better as an entrée than a husband 1.4581 0.03917 310 203 72 35
264 Excellent choice, ordering ahead. 1.4578 0.04042 308 206 63 39
265 He asked me to thank you for last night. 1.4564 0.04059 287 188 67 32
266 Your lover and onions, well done 1.4553 0.04406 257 172 53 32
267 Mate on a Plate with shallots. 1.4552 0.03907 290 186 76 28
268 Congratulations. I hear you’re expecting. 1.4549 0.04294 266 177 57 32
269 I see your husband will be joining you after all 1.4549 0.04261 266 176 59 31
270 Ahhh,…. Dinner for two minus one. 1.4545 0.04027 275 177 71 27
271 Yes,the Croak Monsieur is mine. 1.4542 0.04304 251 164 60 27
272 Your partner has arrived. 1.4538 0.04086 260 166 70 24
273 It was supposed to be foreplay, but I got carried away. 1.4538 0.04554 238 159 50 29
274 Are you the head waiter 1.4505 0.04625 222 147 50 25
275 It’s perfect. This wine doesn’t have a lot of body, either. 1.4505 0.05828 111 68 36 7
276 That’s serving him right. 1.4504 0.04307 262 175 56 31
277 He died doing what he loved. 1.4496 0.04394 238 156 57 25
278 Chef made an exception to bring-your-own but asks that I tell you, only this once. 1.4493 0.03906 296 193 73 30
279 As you ordered, Madame. Your mate on a plate. 1.4493 0.03981 276 178 72 26
280 Yes, Ma’am … I’m the head waiter. 1.4492 0.03903 325 219 66 40
281 The moment you realize your French is not as good as you thought. 1.4491 0.04046 285 188 66 31
282 I actually asked for his bread on a plate. 1.4487 0.04328 263 177 54 32
283 I take it your third date went exceedingly well, ma’am 1.4479 0.04479 259 178 46 35
284 I hope it’s as good as the sex. 1.4472 0.04863 199 132 45 22
285 As you requested, his head on a platter. 1.4461 0.04254 269 181 56 32
286 Madame, the sous-chef sends his condolences and the head chef sends his congratulations. 1.4456 0.04282 285 197 49 39
287 So my date did show up.” 1.4449 0.04141 245 157 67 21
288 Here’s your order. Husband Du Jour. 1.4444 0.04165 243 156 66 21
289 Who doesn’t love date night?! 1.4444 0.04363 234 153 58 23
290 Looks like you’ve worked up an appetite. 1.4439 0.04603 205 133 53 19
291 Your entree, Madam – ‘Bitter Divorce with scalloped potatoes’ 1.4435 0.04374 248 166 54 28
292 Love rears its ugly head. 1.4431 0.04286 246 162 59 25
293 The honeymoon special. 1.4430 0.04484 237 159 51 27
294 As handsome as the day we married. 1.4426 0.04389 244 163 54 27
295 Thanks for ordering ahead, Ms. Mantis. 1.4423 0.04705 208 138 48 22
296 Your mate, I mean plate, is served. 1.4423 0.04224 260 173 59 28
297 From the chef, Madame. He’s sorry it didn’t work out. 1.4418 0.04131 249 161 66 22
298 Once again I have to pick up the check. 1.4416 0.04130 274 183 61 30
299 Yes,it IS big,but then you’re eating for ten thousand. 1.4416 0.04272 231 149 62 20
300 Compliments of the head waiter. 1.4412 0.04249 272 185 54 33
301 If you didn’t think he was a tender lover, the chef thinks you’ll be delighted with this 1.4408 0.04219 245 160 62 23
302 Oh good! Something familiar 1.4405 0.03978 252 160 73 19
303 Apparently you did not bite off more than you could chew. 1.4402 0.04127 259 170 64 25
304 Would you like any flies with that? 1.4400 0.04893 200 135 42 23
305 From farm to table. 1.4395 0.04259 248 164 59 25
306 He looks even more ravishing cooked 1.4395 0.04470 223 147 54 22
307 He didn’t have a prayer. 1.4391 0.04583 230 156 47 27
308 The Chef hopes you enjoy your dinner and sends his best wishes on your growing family. 1.4385 0.04230 244 160 61 23
309 Today’s special is: Your ex, served medium-well, drenched in a port wine reduction sauce in a bed of his own making. 1.4385 0.04463 244 166 49 29
310 You are what you eat. 1.4381 0.04620 210 139 50 21
311 If you like we can put the rest in a take home carton. 1.4380 0.04281 258 174 55 29
312 Would you believe it…this is where we had our first date. 1.4378 0.04358 249 168 53 28
313 Madame, your locally-sourced Tête de Beau. Bon appétit! 1.4369 0.04250 222 142 63 17
314 Prayer answered, Madame: Your husband has arrived for dinner. 1.4367 0.04095 245 158 67 20
315 It is locally sourced in this neighborhood, madame. 1.4364 0.04074 236 153 65 18
316 You killed him, we grilled him! 1.4360 0.04652 211 141 48 22
317 Should I run his card for the bill? 1.4353 0.04423 255 176 47 32
318 It’s our consummation dinner. 1.4348 0.04717 207 139 46 22
319 I’ll never forget our first, and only time. 1.4337 0.04243 249 166 58 25
320 Coming next, the most stunning finale ever on The Bachelorette… 1.4332 0.04344 247 167 53 27
321 Will madame require another mate for dessert? 1.4330 0.04241 261 177 55 29
322 I like to have my mate and eat him too. 1.4327 0.04370 245 166 52 27
323 No, no, this isn’t what I ordered. We’re supposed to mate first. 1.4324 0.04300 259 177 52 30
324 You idiot! That’s my brother, not my husband! 1.4311 0.04481 225 151 51 23
325 My dating profile did say Man Eater. 1.4310 0.04913 174 114 45 15
326 Here is your Ladies Day special. 1.4309 0.04468 246 170 46 30
327 Sheesh, I can’t believe I slept with that guy 1.4309 0.05063 188 129 37 22
328 Compliments from the gentleman that was at the next table. 1.4308 0.04078 253 166 65 22
329 Compliments of your lawyer. 1.4308 0.04229 253 170 57 26
330 Presenting the Head of the Household, Madam. 1.4305 0.04327 223 146 58 19
331 So nice that your husband can join you 1.4303 0.04343 244 165 53 26
332 Having dinner with your husband? 1.4303 0.04401 251 173 48 30
333 Take it back. Revenge is a dish best served cold! 1.4301 0.04145 272 185 57 30
334 Glad I ordered a head. 1.4299 0.04539 221 149 49 23
335 Compliments of the gentleman at the far table. 1.4298 0.04437 228 153 52 23
336 Thanks. Just what I was preying for. 1.4291 0.04416 247 170 48 29
337 ‘Your Head of Household, madam.’ 1.4286 0.04449 224 150 52 22
338 I’m thrilled. He said he’d join me for dinner! 1.4279 0.04389 215 141 56 18
339 Madam, your companion has arrived 1.4279 0.04289 215 139 60 16
340 May I suggest a full bodied Merlot? 1.4279 0.04769 215 149 40 26
341 Courtesy of the gentleman at the bar. 1.4275 0.04383 255 177 47 31
342 May I presume you had the last word? 1.4274 0.04224 234 154 60 20
343 Your dinner guest is served. 1.4274 0.04558 234 162 44 28
344 Check mate. 1.4273 0.04413 220 146 54 20
345 Congratulations on your honeymoon, Mrs. Mantis. Compliments from the hotel. 1.4273 0.04552 220 149 48 23
346 If you insist — I am eating for two now… 1.4268 0.04244 239 159 58 22
347 I always did enjoy picking his brain. 1.4265 0.04911 204 142 37 25
348 Voila, your ‘Mate-on-a-Plate’ is served, Madame. 1.4257 0.04639 202 135 48 19
349 I told you I’d have him over for dinner 1.4257 0.04237 249 168 56 25
350 My husband never looked so good. 1.4249 0.04406 233 158 51 24
351 Chef did mention that your husband paid for this meal. 1.4249 0.04146 233 152 63 18
352 Might I suggest a nice chianti and some fava beans? 1.4240 0.04596 217 148 46 23
353 Tonight’s special for the bride. 1.4236 0.04725 203 138 44 21
354 Well, we know what you did this afternoon. 1.4236 0.04725 203 138 44 21
355 Will you be taking the remainder to go, Madame? 1.4233 0.04689 189 125 48 16
356 I’m sure he’s not the first guy to lose his head over you. Bon appétit. 1.4232 0.04257 241 162 56 23
357 The chef believes you are what you eat. 1.4231 0.04331 208 135 58 15
358 It looks like I will be dining alone 1.4227 0.04503 220 149 49 22
359 Madame, your tete de beau… 1.4221 0.04577 199 132 50 17
360 As per the divorce agreement… bon appetit, madam.” 1.4217 0.04488 230 158 47 25
361 Compliments of the head waiter, maam… 1.4215 0.04547 223 153 46 24
362 You may order dessert from our menu, or use Tinder again. 1.4215 0.04547 223 153 46 24
363 Voilá, madame. This evening’s special: Eat pray, love. 1.4213 0.04334 235 159 53 23
364 Your dinner and date, madam. 1.4208 0.04473 202 133 53 16
365 He was looking for love in the wrong place. 1.4198 0.04426 212 141 53 18
366 I take it you are eating for two now. 1.4190 0.04655 210 144 44 22
367 No one usually orders this until the third date. 1.4189 0.04561 222 153 45 24
368 He would have wanted you to have this. 1.4188 0.04651 191 127 48 16
369 I told him that I’d love to have him for dinner. 1.4185 0.04585 184 120 51 13
370 I like waiting on praying mantis’s.
They always order ahead.
1.4182 0.04545 220 151 46 23
371 See, this is what happens when you forget your safe word. 1.4176 0.04812 182 122 44 16
372 I do love a nice Bed & Breakfast. 1.4176 0.04997 182 125 38 19
373 And now for ze afterplay. 1.4159 0.04730 214 150 39 25
374 Valentine’s dinner for one! 1.4159 0.04589 214 147 45 22
375 I could’ve made this at home. 1.4159 0.04822 214 152 35 27
376 Madame, your monsieur meuniere. Bon appetit. 1.4158 0.04684 202 138 44 20
377 I told him I was to die for. 1.4156 0.04345 243 168 49 26
378 Would Madam care for a cigarette as well? 1.4153 0.04914 183 125 40 18
379 Your third date seems to have gone well, Madame. 1.4149 0.04699 188 126 46 16
380 So much nicer to eat him than to eat with him. 1.4147 0.04588 217 150 44 23
381 So glad your husband could join us this evening. 1.4146 0.04528 205 138 49 18
382 Croak Monsieur 1.4141 0.04586 198 133 48 17
383 Wait! That’s not my husband! 1.4140 0.05350 157 108 33 16
384 You know, it’s best served cold. 1.4140 0.05032 186 130 35 21
385 THAT’S NOT JOHN!!! 1.4135 0.04532 208 141 48 19
386 Might I also offer Madame a Happy Mother’s Day. 1.4131 0.04554 213 146 46 21
387 Or would you just prefer a cigarette? 1.4130 0.04352 230 157 51 22
388 Well executed…pray tell. 1.4126 0.04240 206 134 59 13
389 It’s not like he wasn’t expecting it. 1.4125 0.04302 240 165 51 24
390 You asked us to serve your companion first. 1.4118 0.04835 187 128 41 18
391 So, I am pregnant. 1.4115 0.04406 226 155 49 22
392 Courtesy of your ex, Madam. 1.4115 0.04515 209 142 48 19
393 Prepared as per the instructions in your divorce settlement. 1.4115 0.04515 209 142 48 19
394 And may I be the first to wish you a ‘happy anniversary’. 1.4109 0.04731 202 140 41 21
395 Oh good! Just what I preyed for! 1.4109 0.04679 202 139 43 20
396 Was it as good for you as it was for him? 1.4109 0.04518 202 136 49 17
397 Your St. John the Baptist Special, Madame. 1.4105 0.04778 190 130 42 18
398 There must be some mistake – I had my husband yesterday. 1.4104 0.04616 212 147 43 22
399 His last request was for me to ask “Was it good for you?” 1.4096 0.04557 249 181 34 34
400 From the gentleman at the end of the bar. 1.4093 0.04723 193 132 43 18
401 Fruitti di Marriage, Madame. 1.4091 0.05177 176 124 32 20
402 Looks like someone’s prayers went unanswered. 1.4091 0.04786 176 118 44 14
403 Hopefully his eyes aren’t bigger than your stomach. 1.4089 0.04712 203 141 41 21
404 For Cora, dining alone was always delightful: no need for small talk or menu negotiations. 1.4089 0.04044 203 129 65 9
405 Yes, Ma’am, this is the special for the day after the night before. 1.4089 0.04555 203 138 47 18
406 To eat, his own 1.4084 0.04758 191 131 42 18
407 You might be familiar with tonights entree. 1.4083 0.04473 218 150 47 21
408 Mrs. Campion finally faces the fact her marriage is over. 1.4081 0.04536 223 156 43 24
409 I’d say Grace, but his name was Robert. 1.4074 0.05073 162 110 38 14
410 I guess this means our divorce is really final! 1.4069 0.04419 231 161 46 24
411 So Ma’am, I gather the evening went as planned? 1.4067 0.04710 209 147 39 23
412 Following your inter-course, I am pleased to present your secondi-course. 1.4062 0.04963 192 136 34 22
413 Your annual dinner, Madam. The usual wine? 1.4061 0.04595 197 134 46 17
414 I told him I’d have his head on a platter. 1.4061 0.04706 197 136 42 19
415 How romantic, our first dinner was here. 1.4061 0.05151 165 114 35 16
416 Just what I prayed for 1.4059 0.04674 202 140 42 20
417 He was the best I ever had. 1.4057 0.04659 212 149 40 23
418 Your ex on a platter, as requested. 1.4054 0.05102 185 132 31 22
419 The rest of your party has arrived. 1.4054 0.05237 148 100 36 12
420 Now I know what you mean by “Having a partner for dinner.” Will you be saying grace before the meal or just praying? 1.4045 0.04440 220 152 47 21
421 Compliments of the spouse. 1.4043 0.04627 188 127 46 15
422 Your gentleman caller, ma’am 1.4038 0.04313 208 139 54 15
423 Right on time! I just finished preying. 1.4036 0.04303 223 152 52 19
424 I just love a family dinner. 1.4034 0.04913 176 121 39 16
425 One night stand? 1.4031 0.04551 196 133 47 16
426 When the kids ask where their father is,leave me out of it. 1.4024 0.04948 164 111 40 13
427 Madam….Your Monsieur!!! 1.4020 0.04329 199 132 54 13
428 To think, maybe HE Should’ve been the one praying. 1.4018 0.04426 224 156 46 22
429 Happy anniversary! 1.4011 0.04579 187 126 47 14
430 Moving restaurant week to the end of mating season was pure genius. 1.4010 0.04774 202 143 37 22
431 Mate au vin. 1.4008 0.04084 257 178 55 24
432 Your husband, Fred, was steamed, then drizzled in a tangy plum sauce. 1.4000 0.04514 205 141 46 18
433 Voilà! Your mate on a plate! 1.4000 0.04825 190 133 38 19
434 Mate on a plate, medium-rare. 1.4000 0.04895 180 125 38 17
435 I can assure you that he died happily. 1.4000 0.04958 180 126 36 18
436 I hope I haven’t bitten off more than I can chew. 1.3989 0.04496 188 126 49 13
437 Hold on–I need to say grace first.” 1.3989 0.04869 178 123 39 16
438 I love Date Night!” 1.3986 0.04876 143 93 43 7
439 Wedding congratulations to you both! 1.3981 0.04548 206 143 44 19
440 Don’t be embarrassed by eating dinner alone, madam. HE has no body either 1.3980 0.04465 201 137 48 16
441 A great end to an awesome romantic weekend getaway 1.3979 0.04918 191 136 34 21
442 I warned him about continually asking ‘what’s for dinner’. 1.3978 0.05058 181 129 32 20
443 The remains of the day, ma’am. 1.3978 0.05178 181 131 28 22
444 Here is your Ex Amandine, madam. 1.3974 0.04870 156 104 42 10
445 This meal always brings back such fond memories. 1.3962 0.05204 159 111 33 15
446 Does Madame recall his preferred wine? 1.3961 0.04633 207 146 40 21
447 Actually, I ordered the fly in the soup. 1.3955 0.04884 177 123 38 16
448 Ah,my 34th husband,Gary. 1.3950 0.04588 200 139 43 18
449 One post-copulation special, Madame. 1.3949 0.04894 195 140 33 22
450 As it turns out, I’ll be dining alone tonight. 1.3946 0.05336 147 102 32 13
451 What a day I’ve had with this guy! 1.3944 0.04694 180 123 43 14
452 Who says that you can’t have your mate and eat him too? 1.3943 0.04923 175 122 37 16
453 Your catch of the day. 1.3943 0.04856 175 121 39 15
454 They never see this coming when they click on Tinder. 1.3938 0.04298 226 157 49 20
455 Your husband, madame—or should I say mademoiselle? 1.3938 0.05327 160 114 29 17
456 Violà – ‘The Honeymoon Special’ 1.3922 0.04678 204 145 38 21
457 I took the liberty of assuming you’d be dining alone again this evening. 1.3920 0.05031 176 125 33 18
458 Madam, you may have seen this dish before. 1.3920 0.04601 199 139 42 18
459 As a mate he was hasty. As dinner I hope he’s tasty. 1.3915 0.04775 189 133 38 18
460 Congratulations on your pregnancy, my condolences for your loss” 1.3913 0.04488 184 124 48 12
461 Compliments of the gentleman at the bar, madam. 1.3907 0.04403 215 150 46 19
462 Today’s dish is truly orgasmic. 1.3904 0.04870 187 133 35 19
463 It has been our distinct privilege to serve your late husband. 1.3904 0.04751 187 131 39 17
464 Want to check your Mate? 1.3902 0.05081 164 115 34 15
465 It was supposed to be just drinks at his place. 1.3902 0.05007 164 114 36 14
466 Girls gotta eat 1.3901 0.04587 182 126 42 14
467 Barry is so cute I could just eat him up. 1.3898 0.04744 177 122 41 14
468 Yes, it is prepared exactly as the last one, Ma’am. 1.3898 0.04744 177 122 41 14
469 I assume you’ll be paying? 1.3898 0.04943 177 125 35 17
470 From the gentleman at the bar. 1.3895 0.05373 172 127 23 22
471 From Tinder to tender, madam. 1.3892 0.05086 167 118 33 16
472 This meal was prepared especially for you by our head chef. 1.3892 0.05026 185 134 30 21
473 Hopefully it will prove more memorable than the sex. 1.3889 0.05007 180 129 32 19
474 Of course in our species the sex usually comes AFTER the meal. 1.3880 0.03955 250 172 59 19
475 I believe it’s your ex-husband. 1.3878 0.05327 147 103 31 13
476 Oh, there you are! 1.3861 0.05057 158 110 35 13
477 I so hope he’s as good now as he was then. 1.3860 0.05131 171 123 30 18
478 It’s so nice to be dining out again. 1.3860 0.04855 171 119 38 14
479 Looks like he died happy. 1.3855 0.04884 166 115 38 13
480 Your husband couldn’t make dinner. 1.3851 0.04989 161 112 36 13
481 If you can’t beat ’em ,eat ’em 1.3851 0.04998 174 124 33 17
482 Compliments of the headless gentleman at the bar. 1.3850 0.04559 187 129 44 14
483 Superbe choice, Madame. Eating for four hundred, are we? 1.3850 0.04559 187 129 44 14
484 Eh, voila……the honeymoon special! 1.3850 0.04804 187 133 36 18
485 Is Madam pleased that she swiped right? 1.3846 0.05337 143 100 31 12
486 Your husband, Madam. Bon appétit. 1.3846 0.04306 182 121 52 9
487 Oh good, he said he’d be joining me for dinner. 1.3846 0.06307 104 73 22 9
488 Is Madam enjoying Couples Night? 1.3842 0.04935 177 126 34 17
489 Madame the gentleman at the other table sends himself to you with his complements. 1.3842 0.05000 177 127 32 18
490 In keeping with tradition of eating your husband after mating, may I suggest a Bordeaux ? 1.3841 0.04769 164 112 41 11
491 I’m having a friend for dinner. 1.3837 0.05039 172 123 32 17
492 Having your mate and eating him, too. Served on a silver platter 1.3837 0.04971 172 122 34 16
493 Congratulation and condolences. Bon appetit! 1.3837 0.04902 172 121 36 15
494 Everything here is served bed-to-table. 1.3836 0.04871 159 109 39 11
495 I pray you like it,Madam. 1.3836 0.05110 159 112 33 14
496 It turns out your husband will be joining you for dinner tonight. 1.3836 0.05110 159 112 33 14
497 Yum, I’m always famished after sex. 1.3830 0.04663 188 132 40 16
498 Never thought I’d be so happy to see my ex again 1.3829 0.04908 175 124 35 16
499 The chef sends his congratulations on your impending family. Bon Appetit! 1.3825 0.04493 183 125 46 12
500 The Chef sends his compliments and condolences. 1.3825 0.04815 183 130 36 17
501 The Father’s Day special is served. 1.3822 0.04993 157 109 36 12
502 Then you shouldn’t have asked for the head waiter. 1.3820 0.04781 178 125 38 15
503 Today’s post-coital special, madam. Bon appetite. 1.3817 0.04879 186 134 33 19
504 I was told you ordered ahead. 1.3812 0.04803 202 148 31 23
505 The father of your children à l’orange. 1.3810 0.04821 189 136 34 19
506 I think you’ll recognize our main course. 1.3810 0.04762 168 116 40 12
507 Your mate course, madame! 1.3807 0.04507 197 138 43 16
508 Your meat cute. 1.3807 0.04840 197 144 31 22
509 He said it was worth it. 1.3804 0.05164 163 117 30 16
510 That’s actually my brother in-law. My sister’s vegan so I get to do the honors. 1.3804 0.04939 163 114 36 13
511 Yes, I’ll be dining alone tonight. 1.3802 0.04649 192 136 39 17
512 The sex was great, but he just wouldn’t shut up. 1.3801 0.04987 171 122 33 16
513 May I present today’s post-coital special 1.3797 0.05282 158 114 28 16
514 The Valentine’s Day special for the lady. 1.3791 0.04293 211 147 48 16
515 Your Tinder date, ma’am. 1.3791 0.04766 182 129 37 16
516 He died doing what he loved, you. 1.3791 0.05246 153 109 30 14
517 He should be delicious, I met him on Tender. 1.3791 0.04729 153 103 42 8
518 You’re going to love him. 1.3779 0.04824 172 121 37 14
519 As requested, on a platter. 1.3775 0.05377 151 109 27 15
520 He was your favorite, I believe. 1.3772 0.04997 167 119 33 15
521 The Dupe du jour 1.3771 0.04764 175 123 38 14
522 Your partner is ready. 1.3771 0.04764 175 123 38 14
523 Oh, he would have loved this! 1.3766 0.05053 154 108 34 12
524 Your Mate on a Platter, Ma’am. 1.3765 0.05032 162 115 33 14
525 Compliments of the Head Chef. 1.3765 0.05003 170 122 32 16
526 Enjoy your ‘Women’s Day’ special. 1.3765 0.05140 170 124 28 18
527 For madame – our Ladies’ Night special. 1.3761 0.05341 109 72 33 4
528 Croqued-Monsieur 1.3759 0.05742 141 104 21 16
529 He told us you would be picking up the check. 1.3758 0.04807 149 101 40 8
530 He looked different in his profile photo. 1.3758 0.05427 149 108 26 15
531 As you requested madam, your ex. 1.3758 0.05112 165 119 30 16
532 I should just like to inform the madam that consuming raw or undercooked meats, poultry, seafood, shellfish, or eggs may increase one’s risk of foodborne illness. 1.3750 0.05347 152 110 27 15
533 We’re on our honeymoon. 1.3743 0.04909 171 122 34 15
534 At last,the divorce is final! 1.3742 0.05190 155 111 30 14
535 With the chef’s compliments for the new bride. 1.3739 0.04288 238 173 41 24
536 And to finish off date night… 1.3732 0.05252 142 100 31 11
537 So, you must be the Head Waiter? 1.3732 0.04471 209 150 40 19
538 With the chef’s sympathies, ma’am. 1.3731 0.04377 201 141 45 15
539 His first wife couldn’t stomach him. 1.3730 0.05604 126 89 27 10
540 I’ve brought you the head of John the mantis. 1.3729 0.04919 177 128 32 17
541 There’s nothing like the taste of revenge. 1.3721 0.04815 172 122 36 14
542 I used to date him. 1.3716 0.04608 183 129 40 14
543 Your 14th this spring Madam? I believe that’s a new personal best! 1.3714 0.05203 140 98 32 10
544 May I suggest the testicles as an entremet? 1.3711 0.05168 159 115 29 15
545 i promised him a dinner after sex 1.3709 0.05367 151 110 26 15
546 This is even better than sex. 1.3706 0.05315 143 102 29 12
547 Here is the rest of your dinner party. 1.3702 0.04772 181 130 35 16
548 Don Juan he wasn’t. Let’s hope the Bearnaise sauce can make up for that. 1.3699 0.05325 146 105 28 13
549 Tonight’s dish comes with quite a full-bodied dessert. 1.3694 0.04973 157 111 34 12
550 of course we will serve your husband 1.3690 0.04743 168 118 38 12
551 Prepared per your instructions, Ma’am. Enjoy! 1.3684 0.04912 152 106 36 10
552 Oh my! I wasn’t aware my husband was joining me. 1.3682 0.04370 201 142 44 15
553 Will this head be all, Miss Salome? 1.3680 0.05627 125 89 26 10
554 Your amuse tête, Madame. 1.3679 0.04435 193 136 43 14
555 Your sperm donor is served… 1.3677 0.05260 155 113 27 15
556 Your kind know how to make a guy really pay for dinner. 1.3675 0.04856 166 118 35 13
557 Your dinner is Herr. 1.3675 0.05004 166 120 31 15
558 I guess this is what is meant when they say “you are what you eat”! 1.3671 0.04696 158 109 40 9
559 Looks every bit as good as the sex was. 1.3671 0.05107 158 114 30 14
560 He should have taken me to dinner first 1.3667 0.04862 150 104 37 9
561 Happy Valentine’s Day 1.3660 0.05058 153 109 32 12
562 He looks peaceful now, Giuseppe, but you should have seen him an hour ago. 1.3654 0.04820 156 109 37 10
563 I said the ‘House Special,’ not the ‘Spouse Special’! 1.3652 0.04756 178 128 35 15
564 I trust you agree, Madame, he’s even more enticing then when you first met. 1.3648 0.05002 159 114 32 13
565 Hope he’s as satisfying as last night. 1.3647 0.04985 170 124 30 16
566 The gentleman at the bar hoped you might enjoy him for dinner. 1.3647 0.05190 170 127 24 19
567 Leftovers? I had him last night! 1.3643 0.05385 140 101 27 12
568 This blind date looks delicious. 1.3642 0.05102 151 108 31 12
569 No wine, thanks. I’m expecting! 1.3642 0.04852 173 125 33 15
570 Husband number two. 1.3641 0.04643 184 132 37 15
571 We came here all the time before the kids were born. 1.3636 0.04716 165 116 38 11
572 Yes Madam, it’s the chef’ specialty: post-coital bliss. 1.3636 0.04859 154 108 36 10
573 It’s our first date. 1.3636 0.04792 176 127 34 15
574 I’m sorry, but that’s not the guy that just mated with me.
Take him back.
1.3636 0.05076 132 91 34 7
575 Of course, we’ll still bring both deserts. 1.3636 0.05358 154 114 24 16
576 If his head is as good as his body, this should be delicious. 1.3631 0.04733 168 119 37 12
577 Compliments of your husband, ma’am. 1.3631 0.04879 157 111 35 11
578 Voila, Le Bed-to-Table special…consummate choice, ma’am. 1.3631 0.04795 157 110 37 10
579 Your husband…medium-well, at your request. 1.3630 0.04945 146 102 35 9
580 Mom was right. My hubby IS steaming hot. 1.3626 0.04546 182 129 40 13
581 He looks as scrumptious as the moment we met. 1.3624 0.05059 149 106 32 11
582 Madame…Monsieur. Bon appetit! 1.3624 0.05147 149 107 30 12
583 I believe I ordered the cricket. 1.3624 0.04686 149 102 40 7
584 Pity, he was a great one night stand. 1.3621 0.04897 174 127 31 16
585 I always loved his eyes… 1.3620 0.04832 163 116 35 12
586 You didn’t need to go to so much trouble, I would have eaten him any way. 1.3620 0.04909 163 117 33 13
587 I hope he tastes as good as he mates. 1.3613 0.05169 155 113 28 14
588 I pray this meets with your approval. 1.3602 0.05104 161 118 28 15
589 The dessert is to die for. 1.3600 0.04756 150 104 38 8
590 he insisted you had him confused with some other guy 1.3600 0.04661 150 103 40 7
591 Your husband personally selected this recipe. 1.3600 0.04451 175 122 43 10
592 For you, madame, prepared au poivre, compliments of your late husband. 1.3598 0.04807 164 117 35 12
593 Quite an end to your date, mademoiselle 1.3598 0.04884 164 118 33 13
594 Heads up! Now let us say grace. 1.3597 0.05003 139 97 34 8
595 Ex-husband au jus… superb choice ma’am 1.3596 0.05590 114 80 27 7
596 All I need is a cigarette to make this a perfect evening. 1.3593 0.04669 167 118 38 11
597 All of our food is bed-to-table. 1.3592 0.05031 142 100 33 9
598 Tex-Mex ex. Bon appetit. 1.3587 0.04505 184 131 40 13
599 The “you catch it, we cook it special.” 1.3586 0.04862 145 101 36 8
600 Your husband, madame. And my condolences. 1.3584 0.04843 173 126 32 15
601 To each his own, but I prefer to share a smoke. 1.3580 0.05152 162 120 26 16
602 Looks like someone got their prayers answered first. 1.3577 0.05554 137 101 23 13
603 I present braised head of groom on a bed of micro greens and polenta in a mantadea reduction 1.3576 0.05176 151 110 28 13
604 That’s the last time I pray to get ahead. 1.3576 0.05003 151 108 32 11
605 Madam, the traditional after-honeymoon main course. 1.3575 0.04656 193 142 33 18
606 He made a big mistake just rolling over and going to sleep. 1.3571 0.05267 154 114 25 15
607 It’s obvious that this cartoon doesn’t need a caption. It’s brilliant as it is. 1.3571 0.05103 154 112 29 13
608 His head on a platter, ma’am. 1.3567 0.04783 157 111 36 10
609 And now, madam’s intercourse 1.3567 0.05113 157 115 28 14
610 “I knew I shouldn’t have ordered ahead.” 1.3567 0.05423 157 119 20 18
611 I thought we were supposed to have sex before I ate him. 1.3566 0.05002 143 101 33 9
612 Well… he couldn’t say that I didn’t warn him several times to turn off the game while my mother was visiting. 1.3562 0.04964 160 116 31 13
613 Oh, thank you. I can’t stand it when the chef leaves the body on.” 1.3554 0.05230 121 84 31 6
614 It seems that your other suitors have suddenly departed, madam. 1.3553 0.04612 152 105 40 7
615 Do you want the rest in a body bag? 1.3548 0.04992 155 112 31 12
616 Your lover has arrived for dinner. 1.3548 0.05972 124 93 18 13
617 Now for the ultimate afterglow 1.3544 0.05164 158 117 26 15
618 Our chef sends his congratulations. 1.3542 0.05258 144 105 27 12
619 I hope you enjoy your farm-to-table experience. 1.3542 0.05258 144 105 27 12
620 Your third husband, madam. 1.3540 0.04859 161 116 33 12
621 My condolences and bon appetit! 1.3537 0.05090 147 106 30 11
622 Madam, our “mate on a plate” special”. 1.3534 0.05463 133 97 25 11
623 Your husband, Madame. Medium well, as you requested. Bon appetit. 1.3533 0.04580 167 118 39 10
624 He was just a one-night snack. 1.3526 0.04965 156 113 31 12
625 I know I get hungry after sex too! 1.3525 0.05092 139 99 31 9
626 Once you’ve had our signature dish you’ll never go back to tartare. 1.3520 0.04580 179 129 37 13
627 I see Madam is dining alone tonight. 1.3517 0.04748 145 101 37 7
628 Hmm…I may have bitten off more than I can chew 1.3516 0.05500 128 93 25 10
629 Francois, he was so special, romantic, attentive, sexy but very slow. 1.3515 0.04772 165 119 34 12
630 The monsieur for the madam. 1.3507 0.05109 134 95 31 8
631 This is absolutely disgusting. Just the way you like it. 1.3504 0.05343 137 100 26 11
632 Oh, he was a handsome one! 1.3504 0.05241 137 99 28 10
633 Will your next husband be joining you? 1.3503 0.04770 157 112 35 10
634 It’s called mate on a plate” 1.3503 0.04938 157 114 31 12
635 I said “My friend will arrive late and will just have coffee, so I said I wanted to order ‘ahead’ not ‘a head.’ 1.3500 0.05357 140 103 25 12
636 Looks great,but I can’t have the wine – I’m pregnant. 1.3500 0.05061 140 100 31 9
637 I asked for it to be served cold. 1.3497 0.04730 163 117 35 11
638 The original Bed and Breakfast. 1.3496 0.05535 123 89 25 9
639 He preys no more. 1.3494 0.04973 166 123 28 15
640 He was a good husband, as husband’s go… 1.3494 0.04748 166 120 34 12
641 First, to all the males, a brief prayer of thanks for your service. 1.3493 0.04917 146 104 33 9
642 I can’t wait to tell our children about our first date! 1.3492 0.05670 126 93 22 11
643 A family recipe, Madame. 1.3490 0.05033 149 108 30 11
644 My former mate, I presume. 1.3490 0.05033 149 108 30 11
645 heads up 1.3487 0.05135 152 112 27 13
646 You might recognize tonight’s special. 1.3487 0.04962 152 110 31 11
647 This is so much more satisfying than a cigarette 1.3485 0.05376 132 96 26 10
648 I’m sure you’ll enjoy this. It was your husband. 1.3484 0.04895 155 112 32 11
649 Your Ex, as requested Ma’am. 1.3483 0.04337 201 146 40 15
650 Too Soon!!!! He was meant to be paying for dinner first! 1.3481 0.05394 135 99 25 11
651 Your date is here. 1.3481 0.04400 181 129 41 11
652 And usually I was the one to give head. 1.3478 0.05158 161 121 24 16
653 Here you are!
The “Head over Heart” Valentine’s Day Special!
1.3478 0.05107 138 99 30 9
654 Here’s your husband, madam, medium rare. 1.3478 0.05505 138 103 22 13
655 Madam, your mate is served. 1.3476 0.04784 164 119 33 12
656 I loved him well – now, time to eat. 1.3475 0.05819 118 87 21 10
657 May I present tonight’s feature, your ex. 1.3471 0.04884 170 126 29 15
658 Your wedding dinner, ma’am. 1.3471 0.04590 170 122 37 11
659 I heard this helps with mourning sickness. 1.3471 0.05161 170 130 21 19
660 ‘Sautéed in his own warm afterglow” 1.3469 0.04889 147 105 33 9
661 The good news is you weren’t stood up. 1.3469 0.05167 147 108 27 12
662 The special…your husband…medium rare. 1.3468 0.04608 173 125 36 12
663 There’s also a note. 1.3464 0.05190 153 114 25 14
664 This is so much better than take-out. 1.3464 0.05106 153 113 27 13
665 No caption. This cannot be improved. 1.3462 0.04868 156 113 32 11
666 I’ll take the leftovers home to my Mother…he never liked my Mother” 1.3459 0.04967 159 117 29 13
667 I requested tartare! 1.3459 0.05234 133 96 28 9
668 From the gentleman you met at the bar yesterday. 1.3459 0.05447 133 98 24 11
669 This should be very much to your liking 1.3459 0.04896 133 93 34 6
670 Courtesy of the consummate chef. 1.3456 0.05753 136 104 17 15
671 Madam, may I present your catch of the day. 1.3456 0.04937 136 96 33 7
672 He seemed more appetizing when we were mating. 1.3451 0.05002 142 102 31 9
673 Today’s Special Ma’am. Every man’s nightmare. 1.3448 0.04630 145 101 38 6
674 I recommend pairing this with fava beans and a nice Chianti. 1.3448 0.04798 174 129 30 15
675 Enjoy your mate on a plate” 1.3448 0.05027 145 105 30 10
676 After copulating, I get the weirdest cravings! 1.3444 0.04616 180 132 34 14
677 One order of the ‘ladies night special’, dressing on the side 1.3443 0.05431 122 88 26 8
678 In love, who can say? In the end I lost my heart and he lost his, well, ya know. 1.3431 0.05122 137 99 29 9
679 You’ll find him much more tender than during sex. 1.3431 0.05427 137 102 23 12
680 Voilà! And may I add that you bring new meaning to the phrase, “I love you to death.” 1.3429 0.05046 140 101 30 9
681 Take it back! I ordered a thorax! 1.3429 0.05147 140 102 28 10
682 He was good in bed, too. 1.3427 0.05167 143 105 27 11
683 My mother did always say that he had a good head on his shoulders. 1.3427 0.04973 143 103 31 9
684 You’re the perfect headwaiter. 1.3425 0.04998 146 106 30 10
685 He did say I hadn’t seen the last of him. 1.3423 0.04928 149 108 31 10
686 Yes. Yes, of course. We made sure he was surprised. 1.3423 0.05019 149 109 29 11
687 Sex is really the best appetizer. 1.3419 0.05451 117 84 26 7
688 Thank you, Pierre — He wasn’t husband material, anyway. 1.3418 0.05061 158 118 26 14
689 Your dinner guest has arrived. 1.3416 0.04754 161 117 33 11
690 You’ll be glad to hear he was a gentleman and paid the bill. 1.3416 0.05146 161 122 23 16
691 You might be familiar with this dish! 1.3416 0.04671 161 116 35 10
692 He had such a delicious body! 1.3416 0.04367 202 149 37 16
693 Congratulations on your pregnancy! Bon Appetit. 1.3409 0.04908 132 93 33 6
694 Mated locally just this morning. Would you care for some cracked carapace? 1.3408 0.04559 179 131 35 13
695 I like my Tinder, tender. 1.3404 0.04914 141 101 32 8
696 I’ll be your head waiter 1.3401 0.04874 147 106 32 9
697 This looks like a perfect match for your taste! 1.3401 0.05153 147 109 26 12
698 Make sure to tell the children that their father had excellent taste. 1.3397 0.05022 156 116 27 13
699 Your Ex, milady. 1.3397 0.04939 156 115 29 12
700 He was hot in more ways than one. 1.3396 0.05978 106 78 20 8
701 Ah; I was thinking he stood me up 1.3394 0.05861 109 80 21 8
702 May I suggest pairing this with a full-bodied wine? 1.3393 0.05609 112 81 24 7
703 Bob always wanted to give me head 1.3388 0.05696 121 90 21 10
704 Good evening Madame. I take it your first night in the Honeymoon Suite was okay. 1.3387 0.05357 124 90 26 8
705 Perfect – first the trick, now the treat! 1.3387 0.05478 124 91 24 9
706 He said he would’ve preferred to have just given you a ring. 1.3387 0.05107 124 88 30 6
707 What he lacks in the bedroom, he makes up for in the kitchen. 1.3386 0.05502 127 94 23 10
708 Madame,your tryst on a bed of polenta. 1.3386 0.05387 127 93 25 9
709 Here’s your date. 1.3385 0.05186 130 94 28 8
710 Not my fault he didn’t read the prenup. 1.3383 0.05106 133 96 29 8
711 I wanted rare. 1.3382 0.05344 136 101 24 11
712 I really enjoy having dinner with my husband! 1.3379 0.05012 145 106 29 10
713 It’s mating season already 1.3379 0.05012 145 106 29 10
714 He wasn’t much of a lover, but he gave good head. 1.3378 0.05300 148 112 22 14
715 Lovely. I am always so hungry after sex! 1.3378 0.04847 148 107 32 9
716 He said you would prefer it this way 1.3378 0.04847 148 107 32 9
717 Very well. And I’d like that with some Fava beans a nice Chianti. 1.3377 0.05051 151 112 27 12
718 Ah, Yorick, we meet again. 1.3377 0.05137 151 113 25 13
719 That’s not my husband. 1.3373 0.04800 166 123 30 13
720 Voila, Alfredo Garcia! 1.3364 0.05671 110 80 23 7
721 The rest of him is parking the car. 1.3361 0.05240 119 85 28 6
722 Thank you, the second date is always my favorite 1.3359 0.05484 131 98 22 11
723 Crunchy exoskeleton,chewy inside. 1.3358 0.05209 137 101 26 10
724 I hope you enjoy your lunch date. 1.3358 0.05209 137 101 26 10
725 You know, they used to toss these things out during the French revolution. 1.3358 0.05606 137 105 18 14
726 His last request was medium rare. 1.3356 0.04789 146 105 33 8
727 He assured me, Madame, he too enjoyed the earlier events of the evening. 1.3354 0.04902 161 120 28 13
728 The rest of your husband will be joining you shortly 1.3354 0.04837 164 122 29 13
729 Your husband came out ahead. 1.3352 0.04672 176 131 31 14
730 I said “bread.” Not “Fred.” 1.3333 0.05377 138 104 22 12
731 He said you were insatiable. 1.3333 0.05480 111 80 25 6
732 Many would kill for a meal like this. 1.3333 0.04819 153 112 31 10
733 And, here’s your Mate Course. 1.3333 0.04912 126 89 32 5
734 I’m so pleased to see that Mr. Mantis is joining you. 1.3333 0.04792 150 109 32 9
735 Good evening, Madame. Your dinner guest has arrived. 1.3333 0.05074 138 101 28 9
736 Your husband requested that I tell you that he hopes you enjoy him. 1.3333 0.05581 108 78 24 6
737 “For your next course, I suggest you compliment with fava beans and a nice Chianti.” 1.3333 0.05664 114 84 22 8
738 Keep it covered till I finish praying. 1.3333 0.04676 168 124 32 12
739 It is so hard to find a man who gives good head. 1.3333 0.04928 144 105 30 9
740 He asked us to say that you were totally worth it.” 1.3333 0.05449 132 99 22 11
741 I’ll be your head waiter tonight. 1.3333 0.06258 99 74 17 8
742 How to know when you’re over your ex. 1.3333 0.05198 141 105 25 11
743 The baby daddy special,m’am 1.3333 0.05232 132 97 26 9
744 He wanted me to tell you he really enjoyed the appetizer. 1.3333 0.04783 120 83 34 3
745 I had asked for the headWAITER! 1.3333 0.05248 123 89 27 7
746 Chef wishes you many viable offspring, nourished by their father’s piquant essence. 1.3333 0.05246 153 117 21 15
747 Now for the final climax !!! 1.3333 0.04885 150 110 30 10
748 Broiled mate, medium rare. 1.3333 0.05248 123 89 27 7
749 May we presume that Madame is dining alone this evening? 1.3333 0.05734 123 93 19 11
750 His last words – Was it good for you? 1.3333 0.05482 141 108 19 14
751 He said Yes! 1.3333 0.05526 114 83 24 7
752 May I offer you a cigarette with your entree? 1.3333 0.05593 120 89 22 9
753 Compliments of the gentlemantis in the corner. 1.3333 0.05150 117 83 29 5
754 Compliments of the gentleman you came in with. 1.3313 0.04632 166 122 33 11
755 Alas poor Yorick,I’ll chew him well. 1.3311 0.05109 148 111 25 12
756 Louie, I loved you so much, great to see you again. 1.3309 0.05043 139 102 28 9
757 Careful, it’s still copulating with you under the table. 1.3309 0.05429 136 103 21 12
758 It’s always awkward running into an ex 1.3308 0.05167 130 95 27 8
759 Wait a minute. That’s not my husband! 1.3305 0.05652 118 88 21 9
760 Madam, we hope this has been your best honeymoon ever! 1.3302 0.05643 106 77 23 6
761 Well done. That’s the way my husband liked things. 1.3290 0.04495 155 111 37 7
762 More handsome than I remember, the children will be beautiful! 1.3289 0.04830 152 112 30 10
763 I do hope you like your ex over easy, madam. 1.3287 0.04940 143 105 29 9
764 We’re honored to serve both of you. 1.3284 0.05273 134 100 24 10
765 Here’s the lucky fellow. 1.3282 0.04900 131 94 31 6
766 Having your husband for dinner, again 1.3282 0.05466 131 99 21 11
767 Is it fresh? 1.3280 0.05987 125 98 13 14
768 Your Croque Monsieur, Madame. 1.3279 0.05263 122 89 26 7
769 Congratulations to your new family. 1.3279 0.05871 122 94 16 12
770 Your Tinder, prepared as usual. 1.3279 0.05390 122 90 24 8
771 “You appear to have worked up quite an appetite this evening, Madame.” 1.3277 0.05737 119 90 19 10
772 Infused with nicotine, as requested. 1.3277 0.05737 119 90 19 10
773 Tonight’s special is compliments of your late husband. 1.3274 0.05097 113 80 29 4
774 Delighted your husband could join us, ma’am. 1.3273 0.04643 165 122 32 11
775 His last words: »I pray this finally pleases her » 1.3273 0.05496 110 80 24 6
776 Sorry to hear about your husband. 1.3273 0.04397 165 119 38 8
777 His purpose is served. 1.3271 0.05439 107 77 25 5
778 This is two times he’s served me well. 1.3271 0.05905 107 80 19 8
779 It appears that Madam is enjoying her date. 1.3270 0.04846 159 119 28 12
780 I hope he’s not as bitter as he used to be. 1.3269 0.06025 104 78 18 8
781 Why Praying Mantis don’t do more than three dinner dates. 1.3264 0.05009 144 107 27 10
782 Isn’t this insectuous? 1.3264 0.05472 144 112 17 15
783 It’s medium rare, and Mr. Mantis said you’d be handling the check. 1.3262 0.05181 141 106 24 11
784 Actually, I asked for the head waiter. 1.3262 0.04982 141 104 28 9
785 Madame was expecting her ex for dinner? 1.3259 0.05024 135 99 28 8
786 The mating feast’s sweet dessert. 1.3258 0.05536 132 101 19 12
787 It’s okay, he knew what he was getting into. 1.3256 0.05063 129 94 28 7
788 marriage bed to table 1.3254 0.05501 126 95 21 10
789 He served his purpose, and you served him wonderfully. 1.3252 0.05596 123 93 20 10
790 Yes, as you know, he’s always wild-caught 1.3250 0.05314 120 88 25 7
791 Serving piece de resistance, Spouse du jour. 1.3250 0.04738 160 119 30 11
792 Mr. Lector says it should go quite well with a nice Chianti. 1.3250 0.05696 120 91 19 10
793 Very well done. And very rare. Imagine! 1.3250 0.05444 120 89 23 8
794 This is the best head I’ve ever had 1.3243 0.05747 111 83 20 8
795 Bon Appétit and congratulations on your wedding 1.3241 0.05260 145 111 21 13
796 We call it Croque Monsieur 1.3241 0.05858 108 81 19 8
797 May your pregnancy be filled with nothing but the best. Bon appétit. 1.3239 0.05150 142 107 24 11
798 Don’t worry sir, it’s wild-caught and sustainably sourced. 1.3238 0.05496 105 76 24 5
799 The ‘kill, screw, marry’ special. 1.3237 0.05127 139 104 25 10
800 Foreboding Thought, Eh? 1.3235 0.05772 102 75 21 6
801 I believe you are familiar with this dish madam. 1.3232 0.05890 99 73 20 6
802 Most people just smoke a cigarette. 1.3231 0.05262 130 97 24 9
803 I beg your pardon, but I think that’s Harold. He belongs at table three with Marlene. 1.3229 0.05829 96 70 21 5
804 Your husband will never know. 1.3228 0.04940 158 120 25 13
805 I hope you enjoyed your honeymoon night – here’s your husband 1.3228 0.04774 158 118 29 11
806 …with compliments of the head chef. 1.3226 0.05191 124 91 26 7
807 Your husband wanted to make this special for you. 1.3226 0.05438 124 93 22 9
808 What was that book? Love, prey, eat? 1.3223 0.05532 121 91 21 9
809 apparently his body was to die for 1.3220 0.05090 118 85 28 5
810 He fell head over heels…..Wait! where are the heels 1.3217 0.05024 115 82 29 4
811 Now that you’ve finished your appetizer course, your salad course, and your intercourse… allow me to present your main course. 1.3214 0.05703 112 84 20 8
812 Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl yet? 1.3214 0.04890 140 103 29 8
813 Madame, as requested, your mate on a plate. 1.3212 0.04852 137 100 30 7
814 Did you also BYOB? 1.3212 0.05173 137 103 24 10
815 Beats having a smoke! 1.3211 0.05512 109 80 23 6
816 My Ex… 1.3209 0.05146 134 100 25 9
817 Excuse me, but I ordered fries with him. 1.3209 0.05146 134 100 25 9
818 I wondered why his suicide note was a recipe 1.3208 0.04831 159 120 27 12
819 You want a side of fries with that? 1.3206 0.05338 131 99 22 10
820 Madame, your husband has exquisite taste. 1.3206 0.05554 131 101 18 12
821 Complment from the madam at Table 3. 1.3203 0.04826 128 92 31 5
822 He always underestimated me. 1.3200 0.04899 125 90 30 5
823 Recognize anyone? 1.3200 0.04899 125 90 30 5
824 This is the first course, the body of the meal comes later 1.3200 0.05279 125 93 24 8
825 I’ll be your head waiter tonight. Are there any other parts of your husband you prefer? 1.3197 0.04422 147 105 37 5
826 The first date is always the toughest. 1.3197 0.05614 122 93 19 10
827 The rest of your party will be joining you shortly. 1.3197 0.05240 122 90 25 7
828 Animal Planet’s reality dating show was canceled after one episode. 1.3196 0.05961 97 72 19 6
829 WORST example of a “head waiter” joke. 1.3190 0.05281 116 85 25 6
830 Your husband du jour,madame. 1.3190 0.05281 116 85 25 6
831 And for the lady… 1.3188 0.05243 138 105 22 11
832 He had a good heart. 1.3186 0.05223 113 85 22 6
833 Even the end of a relationship can be a cause for celebration. 1.3186 0.04912 113 80 30 3
834 ”…and our suggested companion wine is an audacious recent vintage, earthy and crunchy, with an abrupt finish.” 1.3185 0.05004 135 100 27 8
835 Oh weird, he seemed more attractive when I was aroused. 1.3182 0.06048 110 85 15 10
836 Would Madame like flies with that? 1.3182 0.05303 132 100 22 10
837 Congratulations on your engagement. 1.3175 0.05480 126 96 20 10
838 You may be the head waiter, but I did not order that. 1.3175 0.04995 126 92 28 6
839 As requested, medium rare with more than a hint of I hope it was worth it.” 1.3175 0.05363 126 95 22 9
840 Good once, good twice! 1.3173 0.05339 104 75 25 4
841 I’m sure this is how he’d want you to remember him. 1.3171 0.04304 164 119 38 7
842 So that’s swipe right 1.3169 0.04934 142 106 27 9
843 Madam, my compliments and my condolences. 1.3169 0.05034 142 107 25 10
844 That will go perfectly with my nice Chianti. 1.3168 0.05959 101 76 18 7
845 For you, from what’s left of the guy siting at the bar. 1.3168 0.05617 101 74 22 5
846 And I thought he forgot our anniversary. 1.3168 0.06282 101 78 14 9
847 After all, Madame, you’re eating for 20,000 now. 1.3168 0.04779 161 122 27 12
848 He was my best mate ever. 1.3167 0.05421 120 90 22 8
849 Romance is dead. 1.3165 0.04793 139 102 30 7
850 He doesn’t look at all like his Tinder profile! 1.3163 0.05728 98 72 21 5
851 Seems you are the winner of this year’s “Mating Game” 1.3163 0.05728 98 72 21 5
852 Oh dear, no. When we last embraced, he asked to be served grilled. 1.3162 0.05100 117 85 27 5
853 Smart to order ahead. 1.3162 0.05648 117 89 19 9
854 This is what I meant when I said yes to dinner. 1.3158 0.06218 95 72 16 7
855 Seeing young couples find true love is the best part of this job. 1.3158 0.05333 114 84 24 6
856 tete du jour, madam? 1.3158 0.05160 133 100 24 9
857 Madame, the Lover’s Special. Bon appetit! 1.3154 0.05241 130 98 23 9
858 I hope he’s better than he was last night. 1.3153 0.06001 111 86 15 10
859 Ms. Mantis, I present for tonight’s amuse bouche, your mate. 1.3153 0.05721 111 84 19 8
860 Madame will be dining alone? 1.3151 0.05212 146 113 20 13
861 Yes. He did indeed say it was also good for him. 1.3150 0.05208 127 95 24 8
862 His head on a plate as requested. 1.3143 0.05373 140 109 18 13
863 Ma’am, for the final course of your wedding… 1.3139 0.04720 137 100 31 6
864 Today’s special: head of food critic. 1.3136 0.05064 118 86 27 5
865 He was great as a mate, I pray he’s great on a plate as well. 1.3134 0.05126 134 101 24 9
866 A tender lover, at last. 1.3133 0.04928 150 114 25 11
867 Ceci n’est pas une tête. 1.3131 0.06524 99 78 11 10
868 No date tonight? Try our catch of the day. Prepared date on a plate! 1.3129 0.04710 147 109 30 8
869 Ma’am, your partner’s last words were, ” happy one hour anniversary”. 1.3125 0.05817 112 86 17 9
870 It’s not my mate but it will do. 1.3125 0.05234 112 82 25 5
871 Now that brings back happy memories. 1.3125 0.05386 112 83 23 6
872 Compliments to the chef on my husband 1.3125 0.05533 112 84 21 7
873 Ah…I see this is not your first date. 1.3125 0.05386 112 83 23 6
874 It’s very fresh, still has a smile on its face. 1.3121 0.04683 157 118 29 10
875 Care for a cigarette with your dessert? 1.3120 0.05378 125 95 21 9
876 Would Madame care for a post-coital palate cleanser? 1.3120 0.05497 125 96 19 10
877 Complements of his wife. 1.3120 0.05378 125 95 21 9
878 Alas, I knew him well. 1.3120 0.05257 125 94 23 8
879 But revenge is best served cold. 1.3120 0.05005 125 92 27 6
880 I knew something smelled familiar. 1.3120 0.04875 125 91 29 5
881 And he’s still hot stuff. 1.3119 0.04997 109 78 28 3
882 I assume you’ve worked up a healthy appetite. 1.3119 0.05164 109 79 26 4
883 My mother always told me the best men are rare. 1.3118 0.04588 170 129 29 12
884 I am your head waiter for tonight. Will there be anyone else? 1.3116 0.05018 138 104 25 9
885 Our restaurant truly believes in ‘You Are What You Eat.’ Enjoy! 1.3116 0.05122 138 105 23 10
886 Of course it’s organic. 1.3113 0.05899 106 81 17 8
887 Do you wish to pray before dining? 1.3111 0.05094 135 102 24 9
888 The aroma is so divine, I just might ovulate again 1.3109 0.05436 119 90 21 8
889 There’s no guilt in treating yourself now and again. Besides, you earned it. 1.3107 0.05524 103 76 22 5
890 He looks a little steamed! 1.3107 0.05349 103 75 24 4
891 Your beloved, beheaded. 1.3106 0.05173 132 100 23 9
892 Matilda always liked to save face after a one-night stand. 1.3106 0.05283 132 101 21 10
893 He said the car is parked around the corner. 1.3106 0.05080 161 127 18 16
894 Would you like thighs with that? 1.3103 0.05395 116 87 22 7
895 Oh, that looks absolutely delicious! But it’s not who I ordered. 1.3103 0.05110 116 85 26 5
896 He was a little put out when I told him he had to pay the check in advance. 1.3101 0.05138 129 97 24 8
897 Finally, a civilized way to enjoy a meal! 1.3101 0.05369 129 99 20 10
898 Dinner is served, Mr. Putin. 1.3101 0.05590 129 101 16 12
899 He was a great and passionate lover, and the sauce meuniere does him justice. 1.3099 0.04915 142 107 26 9
900 I’m glad that your husband could join us. 1.3097 0.05491 113 85 21 7
901 I’m sorry, there’s been a mistake. I’m a praying mantis. 1.3095 0.04972 126 93 27 6
902 This needs no caption, it’s great on its own. 1.3095 0.04972 126 93 27 6
903 We call it pray, love, eat. 1.3094 0.05191 139 107 21 11
904 A nominal corpsage fee does apply when you bring your own husband, madam. 1.3091 0.05285 110 81 24 5
905 Your ex, madame. Bon appetit. 1.3089 0.05180 123 92 24 7
906 Here is tonight’s matriarchy special. 1.3089 0.05431 123 94 20 9
907 It is always our great pleasure to cater your weddings. 1.3089 0.05307 123 93 22 8
908 The date dessert, madam. 1.3087 0.04752 149 112 28 9
909 He looks different dead. 1.3085 0.05245 94 67 25 2
910 He always said he wanted to go out in style. 1.3084 0.05379 107 79 23 5
911 I can go speak to the manager but, he is going to agree with me. You can’t complain about the portion being small when you are the one who provided it. 1.3083 0.05265 120 90 23 7
912 Mind if I take a selfie for the kids? 1.3083 0.05650 120 93 17 10
913 Your Baby Daddy Supreme, Madam. 1.3077 0.05647 104 78 20 6
914 Your usual as always, Madame. 1.3077 0.05216 117 87 24 6
915 Our head chef sends this with his regards. 1.3077 0.05073 117 86 26 5
916 Ending relationships is always difficult. 1.3077 0.05491 117 89 20 8
917 Your al denta amor, madam 1.3071 0.05063 127 95 25 7
918 I told him that if he crossed me I would have his head on a platter! 1.3070 0.05449 114 86 21 7
919 With compliments from your ex. 1.3070 0.05157 114 84 25 5
920 Your prayers have been answered. 1.3069 0.05403 101 74 23 4
921 Ah, just the way I like my husbands. 1.3069 0.05583 101 75 21 5
922 I hear it’s to die for! 1.3068 0.05202 88 62 25 1
923 Tonight’s special: last night’s date 1.3068 0.06334 88 67 15 6
924 We call this dish Alfredo Garcia 1.3065 0.05513 124 96 18 10
925 Your husband, m’am. Enjoy. 1.3065 0.05270 124 94 22 8
926 His last words were ‘ Please tell her it was all worth it’. 1.3065 0.05270 124 94 22 8
927 I married him for his looks — and he’s still a dish. 1.3061 0.04885 147 112 25 10
928 Taste familial? 1.3058 0.04817 121 88 29 4
929 You’re looking wonderful tonight my dear. 1.3056 0.05002 108 78 27 3
930 Your husband, well done as requested… 1.3053 0.05810 95 71 19 5
931 My last customer was a pig, and he ordered pork chops. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
932 Aw, the love of my life. 1.3051 0.05316 118 89 22 7
933 This is the best date I’ve eaten all week. 1.3051 0.05451 118 90 20 8
934 She really whet your appetite didn’t she? 1.3051 0.04890 118 86 28 4
935 He was the best lover I ever had, alas… 1.3048 0.05434 105 78 22 5
936 I guess I’m having what she had. 1.3048 0.05434 105 78 22 5
937 You idiot, you cooked him before we had sex! 1.3043 0.05408 115 87 21 7
938 He should have bought you dinner first. 1.3043 0.06132 92 70 16 6
939 Your date-night special, Madam. 1.3043 0.05119 115 85 25 5
940 I’d rather just have a cigarette afterwards like everyone else, but those potatoes look divine. 1.3040 0.05355 125 96 20 9
941 All our males are locally sourced. 1.3037 0.04962 135 102 25 8
942 He told me to tell you that he DOES take this personally 1.3037 0.05073 135 103 23 9
943 What a treat! When Bill asked me out for dinner I had no idea this is what he had in mind 1.3036 0.05649 112 86 18 8
944 Post-coital snack? 1.3036 0.05205 112 83 24 5
945 Voilà, madame, your catch of the day. 1.3036 0.05505 112 85 20 7
946 I warned him! 1.3036 0.05205 112 83 24 5
947 Decaptionated 1.3036 0.05505 112 85 20 7
948 He was great last night. 1.3034 0.06272 89 68 15 6
949 May I present an amuse-bouche? 1.3033 0.05059 122 91 25 6
950 We have to charge a small corking fee for both the wine and the head you brought with you madam. Bon appetit. 1.3033 0.05059 122 91 25 6
951 Wasn’t vengeance supposed to be served cold? 1.3028 0.04996 142 109 23 10
952 It was love at first sight. 1.3028 0.05756 109 84 17 8
953 It’s so good to see you again, Maurice! 1.3028 0.05607 109 83 19 7
954 I’ll miss the great sex. 1.3028 0.05132 109 80 25 4
955 I take it your divorce came through. 1.3025 0.05411 119 91 20 8
956 Violà, Salomé, your favorite. 1.3025 0.05141 119 89 24 6
957 Madame, courtesy of your husband. 1.3023 0.04618 129 94 31 4
958 You kill it, we cook it 1.3023 0.06204 86 65 16 5
959 Thank you for removing the cigarette. 1.3023 0.05116 129 98 23 8
960 But, is it Kosher? 1.3021 0.05565 96 71 21 4
961 I see you’re on your honeymoon. 1.3021 0.05758 96 72 19 5
962 Your date has arrived. 1.3019 0.05046 106 77 26 3
963 From the gentleman at the bar, with his compliments 1.3019 0.05221 106 78 24 4
964 Do you have any ketchup? 1.3019 0.05555 106 80 20 6
965 Revenge reimagined. 1.3017 0.05081 116 86 25 5
966 I lure. I mate. I eat. It never gets old. You’ve really outdone yourself this time, Henri. 1.3016 0.05073 126 95 24 7
967 We meet again 1.3014 0.04597 146 109 30 7
968 I see your husband is joining you for dinner tonight. 1.3011 0.05677 93 69 20 4
969 Oh my Dear! 1.3011 0.05677 93 69 20 4
970 He’s never looked so good. 1.3010 0.05490 103 77 21 5
971 I may be wrong, but I see a hint of a smile. 1.3010 0.05132 103 75 25 3
972 Today’s special: mate on a plate. 1.3010 0.05490 103 77 21 5
973 So much for praying… 1.3010 0.05661 103 78 19 6
974 His children will love the story of our last meal together. 1.3009 0.05316 113 85 22 6
975 Your revenge…served cold 1.3009 0.05745 113 88 16 9
976 Voilà! The Engagement Special! 1.3008 0.05282 123 94 21 8
977 Chef suggests you save room for dessert. 1.3008 0.05282 123 94 21 8
978 Dining alone? 1.3008 0.05407 123 95 19 9
979 This is the first time that I’ve ever told him that anything he did was well done. 1.3008 0.04608 123 89 31 3
980 Send him back. I didn’t even have sex with him first. 1.3008 0.05117 133 102 22 9
981 I guess I’ll be able to say he had good taste. 1.3008 0.05117 133 102 22 9
982 That’s to die for 1.3008 0.04771 133 99 28 6
983 Madame, for your main course, I present your husband, tastefully imbued with butter and grilled to perfection. 1.3008 0.05005 133 101 24 8
984 Oh good, he stayed for dinner afterwards. 1.3000 0.05422 130 102 17 11
985 The mating seasonal special, complements of your life partner. 1.3000 0.05575 90 66 21 3
986 One check, I presume? 1.3000 0.06276 100 79 12 9
987 I met him on preying mantis tinder. “Let’s hook-up and I’ll take you out for dinner” I said. 1.3000 0.05563 110 84 19 7
988 Compliments of the hussy at the end of the bar.” 1.3000 0.04754 110 79 29 2
989 That’s not my partner. 1.3000 0.05626 120 94 16 10
990 Here’s hoping that all your children are girls! 1.3000 0.05596 100 75 20 5
991 Your husband asked that you eat ahead of him. 1.3000 0.06276 100 79 12 9
992 Oh, that’s perfect, thank you. And if it’s not too much trouble, a side of ranch? 1.2993 0.04570 147 110 30 7
993 Madam, we do hope you enjoy our family platter. 1.2992 0.04913 127 95 26 6
994 He phoned a head for reservations 1.2992 0.04913 127 95 26 6
995 Oh, he’s much happier this way. 1.2992 0.05281 127 98 20 9
996 Nice try. But that is not my husband. 1.2991 0.05855 117 93 13 11
997 Eat, praying mantis, love. 1.2991 0.05510 107 81 20 6
998 Stuffed date. 1.2990 0.05707 97 73 19 5
999 YOUR SPOUSE, MADAM. 1.2987 0.04526 154 116 30 8
1000 He’d like to get back together. 1.2985 0.04858 134 101 26 7
1001 Beloved Au gratin! 1.2984 0.05369 124 96 19 9
1002 Your just deserts! 1.2984 0.04719 124 91 29 4
1003 He just had sex, so it’s fresh” 1.2982 0.05700 114 89 16 9
1004 It was too late when he said he didn’t think he was ready for a commitment. 1.2981 0.05937 104 81 15 8
1005 A true gentleman gives head on the first date. 1.2981 0.05937 104 81 15 8
1006 May we presume Madame is eating for two? 1.2981 0.05937 104 81 15 8
1007 Your last husband, very rare, with a side of next morning remorse. 1.2981 0.05271 104 77 23 4
1008 Alas, poor Frank, I knew him well. 1.2979 0.06205 94 73 14 7
1009 Finally, some real head 1.2976 0.06055 84 63 17 4
1010 Well done, unlike the actual date. 1.2976 0.06511 84 65 13 6
1011 He had a big smile on his face. 1.2975 0.05333 121 93 20 8
1012 Can I have A1 mantis sauce? 1.2975 0.05585 121 95 16 10
1013 Your husband, a la carte, Madam. 1.2973 0.05665 111 86 17 8
1014 It is indeed him, madam. The turmeric seasoning just made his eyes seem a little dreamy. 1.2973 0.05665 111 86 17 8
1015 I don’t always get head on a first date. 1.2973 0.05665 111 88 14 9
1016 And for our main course we have a taste of your own medicine. 1.2973 0.05368 111 84 21 6
1017 Ah! And old lover joining me for dinner! 1.2971 0.04869 138 105 25 8
1018 The bride’s special, madam! 1.2970 0.05367 101 75 22 4
1019 Dennis is served. 1.2970 0.05724 101 77 18 6
1020 Is Madame enjoying her honeymoon? 1.2967 0.06151 91 70 15 6
1021 He’s never looked hotter 1.2966 0.05150 118 89 23 6
1022 Madam, Your Mate on a Plate served the usual way 1.2966 0.05002 145 113 21 11
1023 May I suggest the honeyed or chocolate testicle sweetbread for dessert? 1.2963 0.04470 135 99 32 4
1024 Here is your order, Ms. Salome” 1.2963 0.05465 108 82 20 6
1025 Actually, revenge is a dish best served cold. 1.2959 0.05840 98 75 17 6
1026 I’m doing Paleo. 1.2959 0.05657 98 74 19 5
1027 Bernie! 1.2957 0.05380 115 88 20 7
1028 Tell the chef I’m in love with his work. 1.2950 0.04945 139 107 23 9
1029 You did say your husband would be joining you!! 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1030 I said, “Cold…revenge is a gift best served cold!” 1.2947 0.05370 95 70 22 3
1031 May I present, in garlic butter, your third husband, Bruce. 1.2947 0.05574 95 71 20 4
1032 Job well done my lady. 1.2946 0.04853 112 82 27 3
1033 Your meal, tete flambe a la mari. Enjoy. 1.2946 0.04848 129 97 26 6
1034 Madame, your husband certainly had a fine head on him. 1.2945 0.04778 146 112 25 9
1035 He spoke of you quite fondly. 1.2941 0.05675 102 78 18 6
1036 Are you sure it’s the same guy. He looked better raw. 1.2941 0.05136 102 75 24 3
1037 Your ex 1.2941 0.05384 119 92 19 8
1038 Mate’s Head On A Platter: always a great choice, Madame. 1.2941 0.06444 85 66 13 6
1039 Hey, today’s special looks familiar… 1.2941 0.05113 119 90 23 6
1040 O, yes, that was some night we had! 1.2941 0.06007 102 80 14 8
1041 I asked for it on a SILVER platter. 1.2941 0.05384 119 92 19 8
1042 I loved him and I”m sure after dinner I’ll miss him… 1.2941 0.05322 102 76 22 4
1043 Already? I heard of skipping foreplay, but this is ridiculous. 1.2937 0.04742 143 109 26 8
1044 You were not misinformed Ms,you can have your mate and eat it 1.2936 0.05727 109 85 16 8
1045 He’s hot for you. 1.2936 0.05263 109 82 22 5
1046 You did say you wanted to have a friend for dinner 1.2936 0.05099 109 81 24 4
1047 He died with a smile on his face. 1.2935 0.05473 92 68 21 3
1048 Madam May your children be plentiful! 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
1049 I did warn him. 1.2935 0.05893 92 70 17 5
1050 He certainly looks tastier now! 1.2929 0.05607 99 75 19 5
1051 The gentleman at the bar sent this, along with his room number. 1.2929 0.05788 99 76 17 6
1052 Served hot and bothered. 1.2925 0.05682 106 82 17 7
1053 Madam – Your husband. 1.2925 0.05186 106 79 23 4
1054 I pray, enjoy your prey. 1.2925 0.05522 106 81 19 6
1055 It’s our widow-maker special. 1.2925 0.05682 106 82 17 7
1056 Yes, Madam, the last of the divorce settlement. 1.2925 0.05356 106 80 21 5
1057 Madam, the Swipe Right special. 1.2923 0.04938 130 99 24 7
1058 Your husband sends his regrets for being late. 1.2921 0.05582 89 66 20 3
1059 Wonderful, I always preferred him for his brain. 1.2921 0.06231 89 69 14 6
1060 Ex-husband tartar – enjoy! 1.2920 0.05134 113 85 23 5
1061 Best Divorce Settlement Ever!” 1.2920 0.05433 113 87 19 7
1062 Your husband is served, Madam. 1.2917 0.06091 96 75 14 7
1063 I thought it came with a side of flies. 1.2917 0.04644 120 88 29 3
1064 Let us pray before meals… 1.2917 0.05524 96 72 20 4
1065 It’s always nice to see madam on Valentine’s Day.” 1.2917 0.05076 120 91 23 6
1066 He was good while he lasted. 1.2917 0.05322 96 71 22 3
1067 Open faced, as Madame requested. 1.2917 0.05719 96 73 18 5
1068 And after…A cigarette please! 1.2913 0.04887 127 96 25 6
1069 Looks nothing like Alfredo Garcia but it’ll have to do. I’m starving! 1.2913 0.05955 103 81 14 8
1070 Perhaps you have bitten off more than you can chew, Madame. 1.2913 0.05793 103 80 16 7
1071 There you are, Madam. The Lover’s Special. 1.2911 0.04605 158 122 26 10
1072 That’s what he gets for cheating on me. 1.2910 0.05171 134 105 19 10
1073 He was a great lover ~ I’m really going to miss him. By the way, could I get a side of Ranch dressing with that? 1.2909 0.05681 110 86 16 8
1074 Just the check please. 1.2907 0.05698 86 64 19 3
1075 I was first attracted to him by his body, but I married him for his brain. 1.2907 0.05933 86 65 17 4
1076 The ultimate dinner date. 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
1077 Oui Mademoiselle, still warm and smiling. 1.2906 0.05437 117 91 18 8
1078 Hokus, pokus, locust 1.2903 0.05838 93 71 17 5
1079 À la decollate. 1.2903 0.06035 93 72 15 6
1080 He called a head for the reservation. 1.2901 0.05024 131 101 22 8
1081 Bitten, not stirred. 1.2900 0.06079 100 79 13 8
1082 This is a special dish prepared by our head chef. 1.2900 0.05911 100 78 15 7
1083 His wife sends you her regards. 1.2900 0.05374 100 75 21 4
1084 Happy Anniversary darling! 1.2899 0.04388 138 102 32 4
1085 Perfect for your third date! 1.2897 0.05477 107 82 19 6
1086 No thank you, I had him yesterday. 1.2897 0.05145 107 80 23 4
1087 Here is your ‘Mate On A Plate” order madam. Bon apetit. 1.2897 0.05477 107 82 19 6
1088 Monsier regrets he cannot enjoy dinner with you tonight. 1.2892 0.06534 83 65 12 6
1089 Honeymoon special for one? 1.2892 0.06068 83 63 16 4
1090 It’s bedroom to table. 1.2892 0.06068 83 63 16 4
1091 OMG! It’s MOTHER! 1.2889 0.06562 90 72 10 8
1092 Looks like this place costs more than an arm and a leg. 1.2889 0.05751 90 68 18 4
1093 I hope tastes better than he performed. 1.2889 0.05028 135 105 21 9
1094 Trust me, he died very happy. 1.2887 0.05855 97 75 16 6
1095 His last words were of you. 1.2887 0.05855 97 75 16 6
1096 I prefer sex BEFORE dinner. 1.2887 0.05668 97 74 18 5
1097 He was a shitty lay. But what an entree! 1.2886 0.04975 149 118 19 12
1098 A family favourite! 1.2885 0.05234 104 78 22 4
1099 I assume you’ll be dining alone, madam. 1.2885 0.05409 104 79 20 5
1100 Your usual post-mating dinner madame. I pray it’s to your liking. 1.2883 0.04683 111 81 28 2
1101 You’re swipe right is served. 1.2883 0.05488 111 86 18 7
1102 La pièce de résistance–your ex! 1.2881 0.05121 118 90 22 6
1103 When I asked you to serve my mate,I didn’t mean it literally. 1.2881 0.05529 118 93 16 9
1104 He was always so handsome when he slept. 1.2881 0.04977 118 89 24 5
1105 Now I pronounce you dinner and wife 1.2875 0.05952 80 60 17 3
1106 Love. Prey. Eat. 1.2874 0.06313 87 68 13 6
1107 Pasture raised and humanely butchered..served with medallions of root vegetables. 1.2874 0.05874 87 66 17 4
1108 Voila! Your husband is finally on time for dinner. 1.2872 0.05784 94 72 17 5
1109 I did not say “Bring me the head of a Acrididea Caelifera”. I said “Alfredo Garcia” 1.2872 0.05978 94 73 15 6
1110 Some find it disturbing that my taste in men hasn’t evolved much over time. 1.2872 0.05374 94 70 21 3
1111 Madam there is of course no need to acquaint YOU with the provenance of THIS particular dish, but do note, such a SATISFIED expression, if I may be so bold…” 1.2871 0.05511 101 77 19 5
1112 Comfort food……. 1.2871 0.05859 101 79 15 7
1113 I hope he’s as good on the plate as he was in the bed. 1.2870 0.05104 108 81 23 4
1114 He had his fun,now I’ll have mine! 1.2870 0.05742 108 85 15 8
1115 Wait, revenge is a dish best served cold. 1.2870 0.05762 115 92 13 10
1116 My divorce attorney said he’d serve me my husband’s head on a platter. I didn’t think he was serious. 1.2870 0.05491 115 90 17 8
1117 Sorry for the wait. Here’s your mate on a plate. 1.2870 0.05057 115 87 23 5
1118 He was your favorite. 1.2868 0.04694 129 97 27 5
1119 Presenting the head of household. From IRS 1.2868 0.04822 129 98 25 6
1120 Alas, poor Yorick. I knew him well. 1.2857 0.05146 126 98 20 8
1121 Your mate’s head, a la carte 1.2857 0.04762 126 95 26 5
1122 Here you go sir, best served cold. 1.2857 0.05071 133 104 20 9
1123 Your husband said to go ahead and start without him 1.2857 0.05012 105 78 24 3
1124 My date is so handsome, isn’t he 1.2857 0.05146 126 98 20 8
1125 Courtesy of the gentleman mostly over at the bar. 1.2857 0.05427 98 74 20 4
1126 This should look very familiar… 1.2857 0.05191 105 79 22 4
1127 it’s black and blue as you requested … 1.2857 0.05618 98 75 18 5
1128 One “Fantasy Suite Special” for the lovely bachelorette 1.2857 0.05012 105 78 24 3
1129 It was a gruesome date, but he’ll make beautiful babies. 1.2857 0.05504 126 101 14 11
1130 I genuinely thought he would be the one… 1.2857 0.05696 91 69 18 4
1131 The male 1.2857 0.05365 105 80 20 5
1132 He was a good mate till he started wanting it every hour. That was just too much. 1.2857 0.05533 105 81 18 6
1133 May I assume that the gentleman won’t be getting the check? 1.2857 0.05222 119 92 20 7
1134 This dish is to die for. 1.2857 0.05141 112 85 22 5
1135 Your husband insisted that he be served first 1.2857 0.05533 105 81 18 6
1136 Congratulations on your nuptials, and I’m sorry for your loss. 1.2857 0.05427 98 74 20 4
1137 Courtesy of the head waiter. 1.2857 0.05191 105 79 22 4
1138 OK, will take the rest of him in a baggie. 1.2846 0.04912 130 100 23 7
1139 Your Husband à l’Orange, madame. 1.2846 0.04832 123 93 25 5
1140 Is it kosher? 1.2846 0.04968 123 94 23 6
1141 Madame, dinner is severed… I mean, served. 1.2844 0.05229 109 83 21 5
1142 Grilled to perfection for your post-coital dining pleasure! 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1143 Alas, poor Yorick!
I knew him, Horatio. He had a good head on his shoulders.
1.2844 0.05986 109 88 11 10
1144 No thank you, I am still full from my honeymoon dinner. 1.2844 0.05064 109 82 23 4
1145 Yum. My former one-night stand! 1.2844 0.05544 109 85 17 7
1146 He saw, he came, he went. 1.2844 0.05389 109 84 19 6
1147 When he asked me on a date, he didn’t know he’d be dinner. 1.2843 0.05464 102 78 19 5
1148 I prefer it served cold. 1.2843 0.05283 102 77 21 4
1149 Thank you for letting us serve you and your mate. 1.2843 0.05464 102 78 19 5
1150 I always get hungry after sex. 1.2841 0.05816 88 67 17 4
1151 Maybe I should have selected red wine. 1.2835 0.04987 127 98 22 7
1152 Prey then pray 1.2832 0.05254 113 87 20 6
1153 I always do love to end a lover’s quarrel with a bite of lunch. 1.2830 0.05149 106 80 22 4
1154 I was finally able to convince my husband to come out for dinner with me. 1.2830 0.05149 106 80 22 4
1155 Compliments of the former chef. 1.2830 0.05321 106 81 20 5
1156 Your mantis meal with no appetizer, as requested, madam. 1.2830 0.04972 106 79 24 3
1157 If you want one for dessert too, there is another mating in the back. 1.2828 0.05380 99 75 20 4
1158 Served al dente…just as your husband would have wanted. 1.2828 0.05185 99 74 22 3
1159 I assure you it tastes like chicken. 1.2826 0.05642 92 70 18 4
1160 The usual, Madame? 1.2826 0.06245 92 73 12 7
1161 Madam, al dente, as you always prefer. 1.2826 0.06051 92 72 14 6
1162 Chez Cannibal. Keto appropriate.
Nothing dipped in chocolate here. Worth the detour.
1.2826 0.05202 92 68 22 2
1163 Not to worry, he prepaid for the meal. 1.2824 0.06175 85 66 14 5
1164 Your husband said to get started without him. 1.2821 0.05674 117 94 13 10
1165 Trust the French waiter to know your love language. 1.2816 0.05418 103 79 19 5
1166 Who knew divorce could look so delicious? 1.2815 0.04893 135 105 22 8
1167 That’s not the same guy I ate this morning. 1.2815 0.04778 135 104 24 7
1168 Happy anniversary. Bon appetit. 1.2812 0.05678 96 74 17 5
1169 Voila. Your dinner guest has arrived. 1.2812 0.04953 128 99 22 7
1170 Sorry your husband will no longer be joining you at these dinners. 1.2812 0.05482 96 73 19 4
1171 Wow, this is much easier than divorce! 1.2812 0.05678 96 74 17 5
1172 There were none left in fridge, so we recruited one of our dishwashers. 1.2812 0.05868 96 75 15 6
1173 I hope he enjoyed it! 1.2812 0.05868 96 75 15 6
1174 I hope he tastes better than my first husband. 1.2812 0.05868 96 75 15 6
1175 Judging by the aroma and texture this was an excellent mating year 1.2810 0.04426 121 89 30 2
1176 Voilà, healthier and so much more delicious than the cigarette after. 1.2810 0.05278 121 95 18 8
1177 The other member of your party is here. 1.2810 0.04579 121 90 28 3
1178 All of my husbands have had good taste. 1.2807 0.05063 114 87 22 5
1179 He said he wanted to eat ahead, before the dinner crowd arrived. Something went wrong in the translation. 1.2807 0.05361 114 89 18 7
1180 May I recommend some fava beans and a nice Chianti to go with your meal? 1.2804 0.05908 107 86 12 9
1181 He insisted. 1.2804 0.04932 107 80 24 3
1182 Back again so soon, Madam? And still without a date. . . 1.2804 0.05277 107 82 20 5
1183 I’d like a word with the head chef. 1.2800 0.05700 100 78 16 6
1184 Your ex, al dente. 1.2800 0.05029 125 97 21 7
1185 He wanted me to tell you you’ll make a great mother. 1.2800 0.05140 100 75 22 3
1186 He did ask, “Was it good for you too?”. 1.2800 0.06169 75 57 15 3
1187 I have the honor to present to Madame la specialite du Maison “male Mantis Tartare”. 1.2800 0.06728 75 59 11 5
1188 Bob was just happy he got a second date 1.2800 0.05333 100 76 20 4
1189 By the way, how are you enjoying the honeymoon suite? 1.2797 0.05367 118 93 17 8
1190 Madam’s guest has arrived. 1.2796 0.05993 93 73 14 6
1191 Ahhh….John the Baptist Grasshopper, if Im not mistaken. 1.2796 0.05993 93 73 14 6
1192 The sex was awesome. A shame he isn’t here to enjoy this with me, too! 1.2796 0.05590 93 71 18 4
1193 I’m assuming you started with the dessert, madam? 1.2794 0.04512 136 103 28 5
1194 Your late husband a la carte 1.2793 0.04985 111 84 23 4
1195 Well…you are what you eat. 1.2793 0.04985 111 84 23 4
1196 Madame’s post-dalliance favorite. 1.2793 0.04985 111 84 23 4
1197 Well, his last words were “bite me 1.2791 0.06331 86 68 12 6
1198 What won’t men do? 1.2791 0.05883 86 66 16 4
1199 I guess you really are what you eat 1.2788 0.05012 104 78 23 3
1200 He served his purpose. 1.2788 0.05195 104 79 21 4
1201 Looks delicious, but that’s not the ex-husband I ordered. 1.2787 0.04694 122 92 26 4
1202 I trust our “morning after/dessert for one” will meet your expectations. 1.2785 0.06224 79 61 14 4
1203 Mate on a Plate, Madam.” 1.2785 0.06224 79 61 14 4
1204 Ah, I see that Epstein didn’t kill himself. 1.2784 0.06173 97 78 11 8
1205 Tell the chef, I loved him before and I’m sure I’ll love him again. 1.2784 0.05627 97 75 17 5
1206 I’ve asked it to be served cold, please. 1.2784 0.05627 97 75 17 5
1207 Compliments of your Sister-In-Law. 1.2784 0.05433 97 74 19 4
1208 So I see your husband will be joining you for dinner. 1.2783 0.05733 115 93 12 10
1209 And for Madame, the Salomé special. 1.2783 0.05174 115 89 20 6
1210 Your husband said he’d make lunch. 1.2778 0.05235 108 83 20 5
1211 Ah, just like Mom used to make. 1.2778 0.06520 90 73 9 8
1212 Ah – now he’ll be a part of me forever. 1.2778 0.05918 90 70 15 5
1213 …and recently separated from his ex. 1.2778 0.05556 108 85 16 7
1214 Madam, your husband has arrived. 1.2778 0.06126 90 71 13 6
1215 Voilá! Tête de mari! 1.2773 0.04611 119 89 27 3
1216 This might be embarrassing but… It wasn’t him. 1.2771 0.05766 83 63 17 3
1217 Bon appetite! He had it coming. 1.2771 0.06015 83 64 15 4
1218 I guess I’m still hoping for a second date. 1.2771 0.06485 83 66 11 6
1219 Madame, I would like to be the first to congratulate you on starting a family. 1.2766 0.05741 94 73 16 5
1220 Congratulations on your union, madam. 1.2766 0.05936 94 74 14 6
1221 It’s heads

I lose!

1.2766 0.05741 94 73 16 5
1222 You know he would have wanted it this way, in a rich cream sauce with a hint of garlic. 1.2764 0.05328 123 98 16 9
1223 Who says a woman can’t get ahead in this world? 1.2763 0.06379 76 59 13 4
1224 I always insist they pay for dinner. 1.2763 0.05803 76 57 17 2
1225 It’s our Valentine’s Day special. 1.2762 0.05820 105 84 13 8
1226 Excuse me while I say grace. 1.2762 0.05820 105 84 13 8
1227 A favorite dish of Vladimir Putin. 1.2762 0.05661 105 83 15 7
1228 .. . as per your divorce decree. 1.2762 0.05661 105 83 15 7
1229 Sorry it took so long, but your husband was late as usual. 1.2762 0.05661 105 83 15 7
1230 You’ve answered my prayer!” 1.2759 0.05279 116 91 18 7
1231 He died doing what he loved: you, Madame. 1.2759 0.05590 87 66 18 3
1232 Oh boy,He looks even hotter now! 1.2759 0.05824 87 67 16 4
1233 Just like George to forget his tie. 1.2759 0.06266 87 69 12 6
1234 Charlie was my favorite husband. He could dance like no one else. 1.2759 0.04834 116 88 24 4
1235 Tonight’s special “Mate on a Plate” 1.2759 0.06049 87 68 14 5
1236 What part of “without the head” did you not understand?” 1.2759 0.06049 87 68 14 5
1237 May I please have five more forks. 1.2756 0.04959 127 99 21 7
1238 It’s considered it an aphrodisiac Ms. Mantis. 1.2756 0.04959 127 99 21 7
1239 Excellent selection of a mate for your offspring. 1.2754 0.04799 138 108 22 8
1240 Your “Tete de Mari en Extase”, Madame. 1.2752 0.05510 109 86 16 7
1241 I told him if he didn’t stop bugging me I have his head on a platter 1.2752 0.04676 109 81 26 2
1242 God is great, God is good and I thank Him that Jim was in the mood. 1.2752 0.05662 109 87 14 8
1243 When I asked for the headwaiter,I guess they misunderstood. 1.2750 0.05288 120 95 17 8
1244 I told him we’d be having dinner tonight 1.2750 0.05893 80 61 16 3
1245 The head is filled with caviar. Bon Appetit! 1.2750 0.06408 80 63 12 5
1246 There’s soup on my bug. 1.2748 0.05089 131 104 18 9
1247 Unethically sourced. 1.2748 0.04730 131 101 24 6
1248 It’s heads. You lose. 1.2747 0.05861 91 71 15 5
1249 Your husband said it’s your favorite. 1.2747 0.04958 91 67 23 1
1250 Today’s catch. 1.2747 0.05649 91 70 17 4
1251 Man tis looks yummy! 1.2747 0.05861 91 71 15 5
1252 Wow,looks fresh! 1.2747 0.05428 91 69 19 3
1253 Ahh, a romantic dinner for the missus? 1.2745 0.05771 102 81 14 7
1254 This isn’t what I meant when I said I wanted head. 1.2745 0.05771 102 81 14 7
1255 My compliments to the exterminator. 1.2745 0.05242 102 78 20 4
1256 Sorry it took so long — he was brainier than you thought. 1.2745 0.05424 102 79 18 5
1257 Well, I did say surprise me. 1.2745 0.05242 102 78 20 4
1258 I was preying for that 1.2743 0.05370 113 89 17 7
1259 It’s ahead above the rest of our menu. 1.2743 0.05067 113 87 21 5
1260 It’s half price off on all same species night 1.2743 0.05067 113 87 21 5
1261 Delicious! I was praying for this. 1.2738 0.06416 84 67 11 6
1262 His last words were, ‘Mounting expenses.’ 1.2737 0.05279 95 72 20 3
1263 I love tonight’s special. We go way back. 1.2737 0.05487 95 73 18 4
1264 Courtship is a dish best served hot 1.2737 0.05279 95 72 20 3
1265 He looks especially delicious! 1.2737 0.06068 95 76 12 7
1266 Voilà madame. Revenge served cold. 1.2737 0.05487 95 73 18 4
1267 Looks like my husband will be joining us for dinner after all. 1.2736 0.05451 106 83 17 6
1268 I understand you’re expecting. My condolences. 1.2735 0.04949 117 90 22 5
1269 Alas,poor fellow,a man who loved not too well but loved me at all. 1.2735 0.05513 117 94 14 9
1270 I assume you have mated. 1.2734 0.05169 128 102 17 9
1271 Might I suggest a nice bottle of chianti with your filet of soulmate, madame? 1.2734 0.04925 128 100 21 7
1272 Susan really enjoyed picking her third husband’s brain. 1.2727 0.05710 99 78 15 6
1273 And for the finale, your love connection, Mademoiselle. 1.2727 0.05527 99 77 17 5
1274 I won’t have to fake enjoying this! 1.2727 0.06203 88 70 12 6
1275 Your usual, ma’am. 1.2727 0.06306 77 60 13 4
1276 Will Madame be dining alone? 1.2727 0.05140 99 75 21 3
1277 I told him to stay out of my yard. 1.2727 0.05337 99 76 19 4
1278 Thank you for the lovely evening Honey. 1.2727 0.05710 99 78 15 6
1279 Oh wow. We dated. Just one time, if I recall correctly. 1.2727 0.05535 88 67 18 3
1280 You are pleased to have your husband join you for dinner? 1.2727 0.04817 110 83 24 3
1281 Our special tonight may seem familiar. 1.2727 0.05294 88 66 20 2
1282 I said eggs, not ex. 1.2727 0.05535 88 67 18 3
1283 On behalf of everyone here at La Tête, we thank you for the honor of being selected to prepare your husband for his last rites. 1.2727 0.05151 110 85 20 5
1284 This doesn’t need a caption! 1.2727 0.04987 110 84 22 4
1285 Chef’s special, family style 1.2727 0.05337 99 76 19 4
1286 Fresh catch of the day! 1.2727 0.05311 110 86 18 6
1287 Your Mate Almondine, Madame. 1.2727 0.04987 110 84 22 4
1288 I had ordered a grasshopper on the rocks. 1.2727 0.05466 110 87 16 7
1289 For some reason I want a cigarette just now. 1.2721 0.04836 136 107 21 8
1290 Oh, darn, I had that last night. 1.2719 0.05180 114 89 19 6
1291 A good meal starts with a good mate. 1.2719 0.05328 114 90 17 7
1292 First date? 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
1293 When you said you served my kind, I didn’t think you meant Uncle Joe. 1.2718 0.05721 103 82 14 7
1294 May I suggest, Madam, you eat him while he’s hot? 1.2718 0.05552 103 81 16 6
1295 He was way too ahead of himself anyway 1.2718 0.05198 103 79 20 4
1296 « Madame, your ex. » 1.2718 0.05552 103 81 16 6
1297 I thought revenge was always served cold! 1.2717 0.05595 92 71 17 4
1298 My husband never looked more delicious! 1.2717 0.05595 92 71 17 4
1299 Well, he did ask me out for dinner. 1.2717 0.05804 92 72 15 5
1300 I specifically said no pincers and no antennae!” 1.2717 0.05595 92 71 17 4
1301 I wonder if I’ll ever get married. 1.2717 0.05150 92 69 21 2
1302 Madame, Croque Monsieur. 1.2717 0.06202 92 74 11 7
1303 Pairs well with a cigarette. 1.2717 0.05804 92 72 15 5
1304 The Prenuptial Agreement 1.2716 0.06337 81 64 12 5
1305 He said, “I want to be served.” 1.2716 0.06089 81 63 14 4
1306 Cage free, all natural, home grown. 1.2710 0.05069 107 82 21 4
1307 He asked me to wish you a happy anniversary and to tell you he hopes the children are doing well. 1.2708 0.05231 96 73 20 3
1308 It’s good to the last bite. 1.2708 0.05826 96 76 14 6
1309 I think that he is going to be my best husband yet! 1.2708 0.05437 96 74 18 4
1310 Yes, we always eat the male after mating with him. He knew very well what the words ‘til death do we part’ meant. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
1311 Well sir, I am the head waiter. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
1312 Tartar sauce and a blindfold. Coming right up. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
1313 Ugh, I never liked him alive 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
1314 Oh,how delightful! That looks just like the children’s father. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
1315 That’s one heady aroma! 1.2706 0.06775 85 70 7 8
1316 Your guest is served. 1.2706 0.05394 85 64 19 2
1317 I’m going to serve your husband first. 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
1318 We call it “The Bride’s Request. 1.2706 0.05648 85 65 17 3
1319 Sorry, we’re just one of those restaurants that always gets your order wrong. Antennas or no antennas? 1.2706 0.05891 85 66 15 4
1320 Fantastic! I told my mate dinner here would be my treat. 1.2705 0.05079 122 96 19 7
1321 Talk about un-self aware…. 1.2703 0.05269 111 87 18 6
1322 Compliments of your late husband. 1.2700 0.05660 100 79 15 6
1323 Looks like I got a head start! 1.2700 0.05660 100 79 15 6
1324 He looks so natural! 1.2700 0.05478 100 78 17 5
1325 I hope you will enjoy your date. 1.2700 0.05291 100 77 19 4
1326 He was a good father. 1.2698 0.04835 126 98 22 6
1327 Well prepared, but it looks just like my ex 1.2697 0.05929 89 70 14 5
1328 Love Bites 1.2697 0.05243 89 67 20 2
1329 He said to tell you: “ You look pretty tonight. 1.2697 0.06140 89 71 12 6
1330 I trust your eggs were fertilized to your liking? 1.2697 0.05709 89 69 16 4
1331 Darling, I’ve never seen you looking better. 1.2697 0.05481 89 68 18 3
1332 May I suggest a fine chianti to accompany? 1.2696 0.04674 115 87 25 3
1333 When he said he’d have my head on a silver platter, I should have taken him seriously. 1.2696 0.05287 115 91 17 7
1334 And what, prey, is this!? 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1335 Voila! Lover is served. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1336 And here is your husband, Al Fresco. 1.2692 0.06235 78 61 13 4
1337 Voila! Your mate’s vertex, gena, frons, and clypeus, extra rare as Madame requested. 1.2692 0.06235 78 61 13 4
1338 Life must be good Madame, this is your 12th male this month. 1.2692 0.05676 78 59 17 2
1339 When I told you to bring me his head on a platter, I didn’t mean I wanted to EAT it! 1.2692 0.04339 130 98 29 3
1340 Yeah, marriage sucks. 1.2692 0.05505 104 82 16 6
1341 He was able to join you for dinner after all! 1.2692 0.06235 78 61 13 4
1342 I said I’d eat my own hat, not head! 1.2692 0.05155 104 80 20 4
1343 The gentleman at the bar sends this head with his complements. 1.2692 0.06496 78 62 11 5
1344 The head of your enemy, Sir. 1.2689 0.04877 119 92 22 5
1345 As you requested, Madame. Sautéed sans bite marks. 1.2689 0.04877 119 92 22 5
1346 I expect you’ll be taking the check. 1.2688 0.05542 93 72 17 4
1347 Shall we say grace? 1.2688 0.05542 93 72 17 4
1348 Madame, may I present last night’s one-night stand? 1.2688 0.05327 93 71 19 3
1349 First I give a head, then I eat a head 1.2685 0.05361 108 85 17 6
1350 What can I say? I didn’t like his dismount. 1.2685 0.05197 108 84 19 5
1351 You know what they say: You are what you eat! 1.2685 0.05028 108 83 21 4
1352 Is it local? 1.2683 0.04908 123 96 21 6
1353 Was there a tattoo of Gary Larson beneath the left nipple? 1.2683 0.06504 82 66 10 6
1354 Your husband. Well done. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
1355 May I have chopsticks, please? 1.2683 0.05220 82 61 20 1
1356 What I said was: I want to see the Head Waiter. 1.2683 0.06268 82 65 12 5
1357 Are you sure it is my ex’s head? 1.2683 0.05424 123 100 13 10
1358 Your dinner date is served, Madam. 1.2683 0.05501 82 62 18 2
1359 I double-checked the food registry, no relationship. 1.2680 0.05388 97 75 18 4
1360 Compliments of the house: Bug au vin 1.2680 0.05388 97 75 18 4
1361 We cooked him just the way he described in his will. 1.2680 0.05773 97 77 14 6
1362 Your usual, Madam. Medium rare. 1.2680 0.05388 97 75 18 4
1363 Decapitated and fresh per the lovely ladies request. 1.2679 0.05227 112 88 18 6
1364 Our after sex special, miss. 1.2674 0.05830 86 67 15 4
1365 Groom du jour Madame 1.2674 0.06282 86 69 11 6
1366 And for the main course, your ex 1.2674 0.06060 86 68 13 5
1367 He’s a rare husband 1.2674 0.05591 86 66 17 3
1368 If I wanted dead ex for dinner, I’d have killed him myself. 1.2674 0.06060 86 68 13 5
1369 Excuse me, waiter, there’s a bug in my food 1.2674 0.05591 86 66 17 3
1370 The postcoital dish for one. 1.2674 0.06282 86 69 11 6
1371 Congratulations on your divorce. 1.2673 0.05430 101 79 17 5
1372 As you requested Madam, the Honeymoon Special 1.2673 0.05610 101 80 15 6
1373 This is one of my favorite exes. 1.2673 0.05245 101 78 19 4
1374 Skipping the ‘appetizer’ this evening? Very good, madam. 1.2672 0.05246 116 92 17 7
1375 Our Valentine’s Day special 1.2667 0.04984 120 94 20 6
1376 ‘With the compliments of the head waiter.’ 1.2667 0.06102 75 58 14 3
1377 He wished to thank you for a lovely evening. 1.2667 0.05288 105 82 18 5
1378 I told you we would meet again. 1.2667 0.05784 105 85 12 8
1379 How wonderful! I wasn’t expecting my mate! 1.2667 0.05428 90 69 18 3
1380 He just finished. 1.2667 0.05112 105 81 20 4
1381 I ordered sushi 1.2667 0.05428 90 69 18 3
1382 You for you sir! 1.2667 0.05870 90 71 14 5
1383 My husband has never looked hotter. 1.2667 0.05870 90 71 14 5
1384 May I present the spousal special? 1.2667 0.05193 90 68 20 2
1385 Love is the gift that keeps on giving. 1.2667 0.05112 105 81 20 4
1386 So I guess we’re here to celebrate a successful first date? 1.2667 0.05653 90 70 16 4
1387 You trying to bug me? 1.2667 0.05122 120 95 18 7
1388 Is that the better half ? 1.2661 0.04873 124 97 21 6
1389 By all accounts the retinas this season are to die for. 1.2661 0.05155 109 85 19 5
1390 But I ordered a thorax. 1.2661 0.05317 109 86 17 6
1391 It seems your date is ready to be served. 1.2661 0.04634 109 82 25 2
1392 Harold? 1.2661 0.05317 109 86 17 6
1393 Sorry for the wait…we get crazy busy at mating season. 1.2660 0.04825 94 70 23 1
1394 Your post honey moon meal, Miss. 1.2660 0.05490 94 73 17 4
1395 And with that Mantis Corleone finished all family business. 1.2660 0.05695 94 74 15 5
1396 I take it this is your second date. 1.2660 0.05490 94 73 17 4
1397 Your “Friends and Family Special ” .Madam.” 1.2660 0.05056 94 71 21 2
1398 After this, have a cigarette. 1.2660 0.05278 94 72 19 3
1399 It looks yummy, but I believe I ordered meat, not mate. 1.2658 0.06670 79 64 9 6
1400 Enjoy your honeymoon madame 1.2658 0.06165 79 62 13 4
1401 Madame, your date. 1.2655 0.05336 113 90 16 7
1402 He was quite fond of you also, Madame. 1.2653 0.05533 98 77 16 5
1403 Perfect choice for date night, Madam. 1.2653 0.05139 98 75 20 3
1404 Et tu Brutus? 1.2653 0.05901 98 79 12 7
1405 Served with a smile still on his face. 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
1406 Just a little ‘heads up’ on the main course, madame. 1.2651 0.06201 83 66 12 5
1407 They don’t call me head waiter for nothing 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
1408 New meaning to family restaurant. 1.2651 0.05959 83 65 14 4
1409 Serving it up on a silver platter never occurred to me. 1.2651 0.05444 83 63 18 2
1410 The Morning after… 1.2651 0.05707 83 64 16 3
1411 We flipped a coin in the back and it came up, ” Heads” 1.2645 0.05084 121 96 18 7
1412 We’re a family now. 1.2644 0.05771 87 68 15 4
1413 Cooked to perfection, and, I might add, a bargain compared to a divorce. 1.2644 0.05288 87 66 19 2
1414 The chef says that the next time you want this, mate with him yourself. 1.2644 0.06217 87 70 11 6
1415 Excellent, he was beginning to bug me. 1.2644 0.05998 87 69 13 5
1416 He looked better online. 1.2644 0.05998 87 69 13 5
1417 I agree ma’am, you are what you eat. 1.2644 0.05288 87 66 19 2
1418 I’ll be your head waiter this evening. 1.2642 0.05244 106 83 18 5
1419 Just how I like my Ex. 1.2642 0.05069 106 82 20 4
1420 We are what we eat. 1.2642 0.05576 106 85 14 7
1421 Excellent choice Madam. I am told he had a smile on his face when he expired. 1.2642 0.05735 106 86 12 8
1422 Wise choice, grasshopper. 1.2637 0.05599 91 71 16 4
1423 His last words were, “eat me”! 1.2637 0.05813 91 72 14 5
1424 Our marriage was good while he lasted. 1.2637 0.05376 91 70 18 3
1425 Take it back. I am in the mood for someone different. 1.2637 0.06019 91 73 12 6
1426 Oh no, George! It was in the moment when you lost your head 1.2637 0.05599 91 71 16 4
1427 Party of two, your order is ready! 1.2637 0.05376 91 70 18 3
1428 You’re sure he’s very rare? 1.2636 0.05430 110 88 15 7
1429 Ah Harold – the kids were just asking about you. 1.2636 0.05274 110 87 17 6
1430 His last words? Why can’t she just smoke a cigarette like everybody else? 1.2636 0.05430 110 88 15 7
1431 Your post-coital severed head and fries, madam. 1.2636 0.05430 110 88 15 7
1432 Actually,I was expecting his genitals 1.2636 0.05430 110 88 15 7
1433 He said you’d share a bottle. 1.2632 0.06588 76 61 10 5
1434 Is it nonGMO? 1.2632 0.06316 76 60 12 4
1435 Very nice, Andre. You would think I would be tired of the same old same old by this time, right? 1.2632 0.06588 76 61 10 5
1436 Your husband will be joining you for dinner after all. 1.2632 0.06032 76 59 14 3
1437 Swiped right today, madam? 1.2632 0.05837 95 76 13 6
1438 I hear that in some species the meal is supposed to come before. 1.2632 0.06316 76 60 12 4
1439 Mademoiselle’s main course and dinner date. 1.2632 0.05439 95 74 17 4
1440 Madam, you’ve had this before, I believe? 1.2632 0.05229 95 73 19 3
1441 Ahh, good. Mating season is over.. 1.2632 0.05733 76 58 16 2
1442 Forget about his head, remember when you ate his ass? 1.2626 0.05668 99 79 14 6
1443 Madame, your husband au gratin. 1.2626 0.05292 99 77 18 4
1444 I’m afraid this is all you’re getting in the divorce, ma’am. 1.2625 0.06096 80 63 13 4
1445 Your Nemesis, Sir… 1.2625 0.06350 80 64 11 5
1446 I’m glad I called ahead! 1.2625 0.05553 80 61 17 2
1447 Remember what the dormouse said… 1.2621 0.04967 103 79 21 3
1448 She preys before every meal. 1.2621 0.05337 103 81 17 5
1449 Send it back. .. he was several husbands ago. 1.2619 0.06135 84 67 12 5
1450 Your head on a platter, sir. 1.2619 0.05896 84 66 14 4
1451 No. no. no. I ordered my nephew. Not my niece. 1.2619 0.06135 84 67 12 5
1452 We’ll save you the gory details of the slaying,ma’am,but let us assure you that the beast suffered enormously,that the manner of his capture involved the patient machinations of an ingenious chess player,and that his head was spiced with thyme 1.2619 0.06135 84 67 12 5
1453 Uncle Arthur? 1.2617 0.05200 107 84 18 5
1454 This should get you ahead in life! 1.2617 0.05028 107 83 20 4
1455 The Chef would like to thank you for bringing your husband for dinner. 1.2617 0.05028 107 83 20 4
1456 He was the mate I had always preyed for. 1.2617 0.05200 107 84 18 5
1457 Tonight’s special is from the ‘was it good for you’ menu. 1.2614 0.05236 88 67 19 2
1458 The eyes are closed,just as you ordered,sir. 1.2614 0.05713 88 69 15 4
1459 You’re husband, madam, medium rare as requested. 1.2614 0.05236 88 67 19 2
1460 With complements from John Baptist at the next table. 1.2614 0.05937 88 70 13 5
1461 We started with dessert. 1.2614 0.05480 88 68 17 3
1462 Our consummation special madam, enjoy. 1.2614 0.05713 88 69 15 4
1463 Sparkling water too, please. I’m pregnant. 1.2614 0.05937 88 70 13 5
1464 Compliments to the chef. Condolences to my cousin. 1.2614 0.05713 88 69 15 4
1465 I regret I didn’t get to know him better. 1.2614 0.05480 88 68 17 3
1466 Poor Señor, por Señora. 1.2613 0.04739 111 85 23 3
1467 Would you mind if I prayed first? 1.2613 0.05232 111 88 17 6
1468 He said he prefers to skip the foreplay 1.2612 0.04729 134 106 21 7
1469 Might I add, congratulations on your new family. 1.2609 0.04603 92 68 24 0
1470 As you ordered, Ms. Salome 1.2609 0.05545 92 72 16 4
1471 I’ve eaten my fair share of males after mating, but this is the first time I’ve had one steamed. 1.2609 0.05096 92 70 20 2
1472 It’s a very hot date. 1.2609 0.05325 92 71 18 3
1473 This dish is familiar to me ! 1.2609 0.05545 92 72 16 4
1474 So much for the dating scene. 1.2609 0.05096 92 70 20 2
1475 I told him to put down the toilet seat! 1.2609 0.06157 92 75 10 7
1476 He does have a certain smile, Madame! 1.2609 0.04468 115 89 23 3
1477 I understand you’re expecting. 1.2605 0.05265 119 96 15 8
1478 He was a great lover, while it lasted. 1.2604 0.05589 96 76 15 5
1479 Daily special for you, never leftovers. 1.2604 0.05969 96 78 11 7
1480 Madam Mantis, Tonight on the menu is the #MeToo special. 1.2604 0.05182 96 74 19 3
1481 I’ll try it, but I still think it’s a dish best served cold. 1.2603 0.06177 73 57 13 3
1482 Your husband regrets that he will not be able to join you for dinner, Madam… 1.2603 0.06177 73 57 13 3
1483 Can I have him with a side of fries? 1.2603 0.06177 73 57 13 3
1484 We’ve waived the corkage fee 1.2600 0.05049 100 77 20 3
1485 Did your ex tell you that he’d be joining you for dinner? 1.2600 0.05245 100 78 18 4
1486 Fred had a heightened sense of his role in our relationship. 1.2600 0.05794 100 81 12 7
1487 I never liked his politics, but he DOES look delicious. 1.2600 0.05049 100 77 20 3
1488 Remember when they used to say, “The family that prays together stays together.” 1.2598 0.05026 127 102 17 8
1489 Madam, enjoy your mate. 1.2598 0.05026 127 102 17 8
1490 He said to thank you for a lovely evening 1.2597 0.05669 77 59 16 2
1491 Why yes, it is very fresh. 1.2597 0.05669 77 59 16 2
1492 Your husband, madam. 1.2597 0.05669 77 59 16 2
1493 It’s the Widow’s Special. And congratulations! 1.2597 0.06511 77 62 10 5
1494 I’m sorry. I told the Maître d’ I was a carnivore.
Not a cannibal!
1.2597 0.05669 77 59 16 2
1495 I’m praying, Man. ‘Tis awesome what your chef can do just ahead of my arrival. 1.2597 0.05963 77 60 14 3
1496 Madame,Ton Amour Thermidor. 1.2597 0.05669 77 59 16 2
1497 I swiped right,and voila! 1.2596 0.05633 104 84 13 7
1498 Looks yummy. I hope the kids have his eyes. 1.2596 0.05112 104 81 19 4
1499 It WAS happy hour for both of us. 1.2593 0.06280 81 65 11 5
1500 Cuisine is what separates us from the beasts 1.2593 0.06280 81 65 11 5
1501 Your dinner companion is served! 1.2593 0.05768 81 63 15 3
1502 The honeymoon is over. 1.2593 0.05323 108 86 16 6
1503 Your husband is hot. 1.2593 0.05493 81 62 17 2
1504 I take it there won’t be a second date? 1.2593 0.05768 81 63 15 3
1505 So weird, even without his head he would not stop. 1.2593 0.06029 81 64 13 4
1506 A heads up message from Putin 1.2593 0.06029 81 64 13 4
1507 Honeymoon breakfast for one. 1.2593 0.06280 81 65 11 5
1508 I generally never have sex on the first date. 1.2588 0.06070 85 68 12 5
1509 Steamed, and low sodium as requested. 1.2588 0.05063 85 64 20 1
1510 I prefer him raw, at body temperature. 1.2588 0.05835 85 67 14 4
1511 Your divorce settlement. 1.2588 0.06070 85 68 12 5
1512 Mildred?!? 1.2588 0.05589 85 66 16 3
1513 I’d never imagined Bob as the main course. 1.2588 0.06070 85 68 12 5
1514 It looks like your husband finally arrived, Madame. 1.2588 0.05333 85 65 18 2
1515 Oh Josh,you almost look to good to eat! 1.2588 0.05589 85 66 16 3
1516 Madame Firefly, may you enjoy the fruits of your labor. 1.2586 0.04761 116 90 22 4
1517 It’s a whole planet of fatheads. 1.2584 0.05878 89 71 13 5
1518 His final gift to you. 1.2584 0.05185 89 68 19 2
1519 At least he died with a smile on his face 1.2584 0.05185 89 68 19 2
1520 You are what you eat, monsieur. 1.2584 0.05878 89 71 13 5
1521 I hope his brain is better than the sex. 1.2584 0.04933 89 67 21 1
1522 Oh. brains of husband–a very rare dish! 1.2584 0.05656 89 70 15 4
1523 Wait while I say my prayer 1.2584 0.05656 89 70 15 4
1524 Its living room to table. 1.2584 0.05426 89 69 17 3
1525 Can you keep that warm? I haven’t had my cigarette yet. 1.2584 0.05878 89 71 13 5
1526 Thanks for dinner babe. 1.2584 0.05426 89 69 17 3
1527 Per your request, your husband’s body was cremated. Here’s his head, braised with a side of aphid fritters. 1.2581 0.05275 93 72 18 3
1528 One “Romance Special.” 1.2581 0.05275 93 72 18 3
1529 The chef heard that you wanted your husband’s head on a platter. 1.2581 0.05492 93 73 16 4
1530 No – it’s not rare. It’s cooked rare. 1.2581 0.05701 93 74 14 5
1531 And he used to tell me I lost my head, all the time.
. .. .
1.2581 0.05492 93 73 16 4
1532 I do love family style dining 1.2581 0.05492 93 73 16 4
1533 ‘I’m just so delighted that you were able to get cannibalization of sex partners on the menu. ‘I’m sure it’s going to take off.’ 1.2581 0.05701 93 74 14 5
1534 No need to say Grace,Madam. I see you’ve already preyed. 1.2577 0.05728 97 78 13 6
1535 It looks like a lot, but then I am eating for two thousand. 1.2577 0.05340 97 76 17 4
1536 Um….. well, this is awkward. 1.2577 0.05135 97 77 16 4
1537 The chef sends her complimantis. 1.2577 0.05135 97 75 19 3
1538 Chef-prepared from the freshest of ingredients. 1.2574 0.05567 101 81 14 6
1539 She took hungry for some love too seriously. 1.2574 0.05567 101 81 14 6
1540 Rare sir . Very rare . 1.2574 0.05567 101 81 14 6
1541 It pairs nicely with the thorax you had for your appetizer. 1.2571 0.05418 105 84 15 6
1542 Silence for a change! 1.2571 0.05418 105 84 15 6
1543 As you desired Sir, I have brought you the head of Alfredo Mantisa 1.2571 0.05246 105 83 17 5
1544 And for dessert, we’ve still got your third husband on ice. 1.2569 0.04947 109 85 20 4
1545 Very popular at bachelorette parties. Enjoy. 1.2568 0.06399 74 59 11 4
1546 He said, ‘Ask her to name it after me.’ 1.2568 0.05792 74 57 15 2
1547 This was his last dying prayer. 1.2566 0.04993 113 89 19 5
1548 Alistair?? 1.2566 0.05301 113 91 15 7
1549 You said you wanted his head on a plate 1.2566 0.04494 113 86 25 2
1550 He said you could eat his head, but there is no way he is paying child support after the way you have treated him. 1.2566 0.05301 113 91 15 7
1551 No. No. No. You got the order all wrong. That is never first 1.2564 0.06689 78 64 8 6
1552 Monsieur pour Madame 1.2564 0.05895 78 61 14 3
1553 Chef Paul has prepared Leroy’s head sous-vide, drenched in crème fraiche and nestled on a bed of blanched haricots verts… 1.2564 0.05895 78 61 14 3
1554 He’s still very good looking! 1.2564 0.05895 78 61 14 3
1555 The special tonight is your favorite. 1.2564 0.05028 117 93 18 6
1556 What happened to foreplay? 1.2562 0.04625 121 94 23 4
1557 I actually wanted the other headwaiter. 1.2561 0.05435 82 63 17 2
1558 Interesting concept, but I prefer mine crudite. 1.2561 0.05706 82 64 15 3
1559 So sorry. We are out of duck. 1.2561 0.05706 82 64 15 3
1560 It seems your date used the wrong entrance. My apologies. 1.2561 0.06211 82 66 11 5
1561 That is NOT the husband I ordered! 1.2561 0.06211 82 66 11 5
1562 Would you like it de-boned or natural? 1.2561 0.05964 82 65 13 4
1563 He thought I was special too. 1.2558 0.05279 86 66 18 2
1564 I can’t say I didn’t warn him. 1.2558 0.05279 86 66 18 2
1565 Your husband already paid the bill before heading away 1.2558 0.05279 86 66 18 2
1566 All our males are locally sourced and humanely slaughtered. 1.2558 0.05532 86 67 16 3
1567 He also complemented you for last night. 1.2558 0.05013 86 65 20 1
1568 Now that’s what makes having sex worth it! 1.2558 0.05279 86 66 18 2
1569 No, that’s not my husband. It must be for the next table. 1.2558 0.06006 86 69 12 5
1570 He finally got his wish to be head of the table. 1.2558 0.05774 86 68 14 4
1571 So he was fooling around! 1.2558 0.05532 86 67 16 3
1572 We used to be friends, but then he just completely lost his head. 1.2558 0.06006 86 69 12 5
1573 I’m told he tastes just like chicken. 1.2558 0.05532 86 67 16 3
1574 Were you expecting anyone else? 1.2558 0.05774 86 68 14 4
1575 Your date du jour, madam. 1.2558 0.05774 86 68 14 4
1576 You may recognize him from your date earlier. 1.2556 0.05373 90 70 17 3
1577 I know I shouldn’t say this, but he’s never looked better. 1.2556 0.06030 90 73 11 6
1578 And for Madam, we have Sir. 1.2556 0.05819 90 72 13 5
1579 Your Ex, served as requested, mam 1.2556 0.05373 90 70 17 3
1580 And I’ll take the spasmodic body in a doggie bag, please. 1.2556 0.05600 90 71 15 4
1581 But I asked for it to be rare. 1.2556 0.05600 90 71 15 4
1582 I’m the head waiter. 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
1583 Therefore art thou Romeo. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
1584 Your husband for your wedding meal. 1.2553 0.06038 94 77 10 7
1585 Oh, my dear Henry, in 25 years of marriage you never looked so giood! 1.2553 0.05226 94 73 18 3
1586 A votre sans-tete, Madame. 1.2553 0.05002 94 72 20 2
1587 Oh dear, it’s a Salome special? I thought you said salami. 1.2553 0.05440 94 74 16 4
1588 Praying the waiter didn’t forget my side of head cheese. 1.2551 0.05676 98 79 13 6
1589 You never looked better. 1.2551 0.04658 98 74 23 1
1590 I hope you agree… This is much better than do it yourself… 1.2551 0.05292 98 77 17 4
1591 You can tell your mom he was a doctor. 1.2551 0.05487 98 78 15 5
1592 I see congratulations are in order. 1.2549 0.05155 102 80 18 4
1593 Compliments of the gentleman at the bar. 1.2549 0.04763 102 78 22 2
1594 My nutritionist told me that I should eat brain food… 1.2549 0.05692 102 83 12 7
1595 Madame, this dish comes
with a side of wings.
1.2549 0.05340 102 81 16 5
1596 Per your request,gluten-free,dairy-free,and high in protein. 1.2549 0.04963 102 79 20 3
1597 When I said “I’ll have his head on a platter” I was not serious. 1.2547 0.05537 106 86 13 7
1598 Looks yummy! I would feel worse had he been paying alimony. 1.2547 0.05372 106 85 15 6
1599 Hubby Tête-à-Tête”, as ordered, ma’am 1.2547 0.05027 106 83 19 4
1600 And for dessert, Ms. Mantis, the head of Mr. Mantis. 1.2545 0.04907 110 86 20 4
1601 That looks awfully familiar 1.2542 0.05408 118 97 12 9
1602 I hear it tastes like chicken, sir. 1.2542 0.04690 118 92 22 4
1603 Bless us, O Lord, and these, thy gifts… 1.2533 0.06323 75 60 11 4
1604 A wise choice, since madam is now eating for two…hundred. 1.2533 0.06323 75 60 11 4
1605 He said it was the best sex he ever had. 1.2533 0.06323 75 60 11 4
1606 Dinner is served. Compliments of your spouse. 1.2532 0.06101 79 63 12 4
1607 My condolences, ma’am, and bon appétit! 1.2532 0.06361 79 64 10 5
1608 I really like the new joint venture between Tinder and UberEats. 1.2532 0.06612 79 65 8 6
1609 Oh my dear husband! 1.2532 0.05243 79 60 18 1
1610 Oh, so that’s what $50 a head gets you… 1.2532 0.06101 79 63 12 4
1611 Per your request, madam, the smile has been removed. 1.2530 0.05098 83 63 19 1
1612 Your mate, Ms. Mantis.” 1.2530 0.05378 83 64 17 2
1613 Mmmm. I hope he tastes as good as he mates! 1.2530 0.05645 83 65 15 3
1614 Your chianti and a side of fava beans… 1.2530 0.06143 83 67 11 5
1615 And now, madame, with compliments, Le Gustation Apres Coitus. 1.2530 0.06143 83 67 11 5
1616 I think he got the message—no means no. 1.2530 0.05899 83 66 13 4
1617 Dining alone tonight? 1.2530 0.05645 83 65 15 3
1618 Voilà madame, la tête de Jean le Mantis. 1.2529 0.05944 87 70 12 5
1619 He’s never looked so good,” thought Edwina Scissorhands 1.2529 0.05715 87 69 14 4
1620 And for dessert… 1.2529 0.06165 87 71 10 6
1621 Judith, allow me to introduce Holofernes. 1.2529 0.05715 87 69 14 4
1622 May I ask when are you expecting? 1.2529 0.05226 87 67 18 2
1623 Lois always had mixed feelings about date night. 1.2529 0.05715 87 69 14 4
1624 Warm but still raw, as madame prefers. 1.2529 0.05476 87 68 16 3
1625 Just as hot as last time. 1.2529 0.05476 87 68 16 3
1626 So, have you been head waiter long?”
“Went ahead and accepted it a week ago.”
“Good for you! Heading out after work?”
“No. Gotta head home early tonight.”
“That’s the way to keep ahead of the game! Say, what’s that you’ve got there?”
1.2527 0.05321 91 71 17 3
1627 He was hot then, as well. 1.2527 0.04840 91 69 21 1
1628 Are you finished saying grace. 1.2527 0.05546 91 72 15 4
1629 I’m sorry your friend will not be dining with you. 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1630 What do you mean, this is not your husband? 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1631 Your date, ma’am. 1.2526 0.05177 95 74 18 3
1632 Your husband will join you for dinner, Madame. 1.2526 0.05980 95 78 10 7
1633 Courtesy of the gentleman. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1634 It looks wonderful. Sometimes it’s nice to eat without all the foreplay. 1.2526 0.05389 95 75 16 4
1635 Thank Salome for me. 1.2526 0.05790 95 77 12 6
1636 Thank you for your service 1.2526 0.04956 95 73 20 2
1637 Madam, you have excellent taste in boyfriends. 1.2525 0.05245 99 78 17 4
1638 I thought revenge was best served cold, but this smells lovely. 1.2525 0.05245 99 78 17 4
1639 Didn’t you say you wanted your cheating Ex served on a platter? 1.2525 0.05438 99 79 15 5
1640 I guess it’s true…you ARE what you eat! 1.2525 0.05624 99 80 13 6
1641 Your marvelous mating memory, madam. 1.2524 0.04921 103 80 20 3
1642 Finally a fancy dinner, that divorce came in handy! 1.2524 0.04921 103 80 20 3
1643 Here you go,Mrs. the Baptist. 1.2524 0.04723 103 79 22 2
1644 I loved him but he had a big head. 1.2524 0.05110 103 81 18 4
1645 Madame! It is prepared to your order! 1.2523 0.05159 107 85 17 5
1646 And here we have your ex over easy. 1.2523 0.04985 107 84 19 4
1647 And here’s the ladies’ night special. 1.2523 0.04985 107 84 19 4
1648 I see your date has arrived for mains. 1.2522 0.04916 115 91 19 5
1649 Your husband is served. 1.2500 0.05270 92 72 17 3
1650 This looks like a dish absolutely to die for! 1.2500 0.05883 88 71 12 5
1651 Brains over brawn, I always say. 1.2500 0.05960 76 60 13 3
1652 Lemme get a pic for Insectagram. 1.2500 0.05764 80 63 14 3
1653 Congratulations on your divorce, madam. 1.2500 0.05175 88 68 18 2
1654 My prayers have been answered. 1.2500 0.05573 100 81 13 6
1655 Dining alone this evening, Madame? 1.2500 0.05116 108 86 17 5
1656 I’ve heard you humans eat the meal first 1.2500 0.05601 108 89 11 8
1657 Complements of the torso sitting at the bar 1.2500 0.06309 84 69 9 6
1658 I understand that John the Baptist was your first husband 1.2500 0.04722 116 91 21 4
1659 The chef commends you on your choice of the Valentine’s Day special, ma’am…. 1.2500 0.05960 76 60 13 3
1660 I’ve been praying for just that! 1.2500 0.06077 84 68 11 5
1661 The chef sends his compliments on another successful mating. 1.2500 0.05038 92 71 19 2
1662 Sorry, I asked for “revenge served cold.” 1.2500 0.05764 80 63 14 3
1663 I hate going out to eat with my ex. 1.2500 0.05752 100 82 11 7
1664 Our chef’s special, fresh from the garden. 1.2500 0.05339 96 76 16 4
1665 Consummate cuisine, Madam? 1.2500 0.05585 84 66 15 3
1666 My husband sacrificed a lot for the family. 1.2500 0.05960 76 60 13 3
1667 What a lovely way to end a Tinder date. 1.2500 0.05837 84 67 13 4
1668 I ordered the THORAX à la Cannibalism. 1.2500 0.05339 96 76 16 4
1669 Will Madame be dining alone tonight? 1.2500 0.05421 88 69 16 3
1670 On today’s tasting menu we’re starting from the top! 1.2500 0.04879 104 81 20 3
1671 Such a good lover, too…. 1.2500 0.04911 96 74 20 2
1672 From item to entrée. It’s the story of our life. 1.2500 0.05270 92 72 17 3
1673 And will madam be having a cigarette for dessert? 1.2500 0.06536 80 66 8 6
1674 I promise it tastes like chicken. 1.2500 0.05837 84 67 13 4
1675 May I assume Madame will be saying grace before dinner? 1.2500 0.05175 88 68 18 2
1676 Please be careful. This dish has quite a bite to it. 1.2500 0.05421 88 69 16 3
1677 Can I get it to go? My date stood me up. 1.2500 0.06523 76 62 9 5
1678 It is so nice of him to join me for dinner. 1.2500 0.05492 92 73 15 4
1679 He asked what are the chances for a second date? 1.2500 0.05585 84 66 15 3
1680 For you, Madame. We know, you know he’s fresh. 1.2500 0.04794 100 77 21 2
1681 I’m afraid it doesn’t pair well. 1.2500 0.04994 112 89 18 5
1682 And a cigarette for dessert, Madame? 1.2500 0.06248 76 61 11 4
1683 So we meet again… 1.2500 0.06289 80 65 10 5
1684 Today’s dish – Heada Hopper 1.2500 0.05658 76 59 15 2
1685 The rest of him got away. 1.2500 0.05046 84 64 19 1
1686 Finally. I’m having him three ways. 1.2500 0.05038 92 71 19 2
1687 My compliments, ma’am, he’s still smiling 1.2500 0.05837 84 67 13 4
1688 Here’s your mate, Medium-Rare… 1.2500 0.04683 96 73 22 1
1689 I will be right back with your pack of cigarettes. 1.2500 0.05851 72 56 14 2
1690 And I thought we wouldn’t be together on our anniversary. 1.2500 0.05270 92 72 17 3
1691 The Valentine’s Day special, madame. 1.2500 0.05837 84 67 13 4
1692 That isn’t my mate…do I get a discount? 1.2500 0.05421 88 69 16 3
1693 Here is our traditional head on a platter, best served cold. 1.2500 0.05248 104 83 16 5
1694 Looks great. Do you know if my friends are still in the bathroom? 1.2500 0.06110 92 76 9 7
1695 Well that’s a rip off. 1.2500 0.06248 76 61 11 4
1696 The Honeymoon is over, Let’s eat. 1.2500 0.05585 84 66 15 3
1697 The romance has not gone out of this relationship! 1.2500 0.05421 88 69 16 3
1698 If I must say so myself, our children will be very beautiful. 1.2500 0.05198 100 79 17 4
1699 I hope it is a male! 1.2500 0.05752 100 82 11 7
1700 Voilà, Madame. The answer to your prayers. 1.2500 0.05116 108 86 17 5
1701 No wine for me. I’m expecting. 1.2500 0.05130 96 75 18 3
1702 Your cousin at table three sent this. 1.2500 0.06077 84 68 11 5
1703 He was always such a hot head! 1.2478 0.05263 113 92 14 7
1704 For expectant mother?
The expectant father.
1.2478 0.05111 113 91 16 6
1705 And a bottle of Chateauneuf du Papa, please. 1.2478 0.04792 113 89 20 4
1706 And here is your date, for dinner. 1.2478 0.04624 113 88 22 3
1707 Well, at least now I know why he’s late for dinner. 1.2478 0.05263 113 92 14 7
1708 It’ll be on the house madam. He phoned in his credit card number and left a generous tip. 1.2477 0.04728 109 85 21 3
1709 Is there anything else you desire, madam? 1.2476 0.05024 105 83 18 4
1710 Please enjoy your Mantis au Divorce. 1.2476 0.04838 105 82 20 3
1711 Looks familiar 1.2474 0.05083 97 76 18 3
1712 Yes, ma’am, it is much easier than divorce. 1.2474 0.05083 97 76 18 3
1713 Mother Nature’s a bitch. 1.2474 0.05290 97 77 16 4
1714 As you requested, the romantic dinner special for one. 1.2474 0.05868 97 80 10 7
1715 Happy Valentine’s Day maa’m. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1716 Take that back to the kitchen. I will just have a bottle of wine. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1717 One former lover, as you ordered, ma’am. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1718 He gave his all to perpetuate the species. Amen! 1.2473 0.05650 93 75 13 5
1719 There’s a personal note under the head. 1.2473 0.06049 93 77 9 7
1720 Ah yes, love at first bite. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1721 as you like it madam, served cold. 1.2473 0.05439 93 74 15 4
1722 I warned him, “No foreplay.” 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1723 Just as you ordered, sir. An intimate dinner for two. 1.2473 0.05220 93 73 17 3
1724 -Marriage a la Carte! 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
1725 Madam, his last words: The sex was great, but why? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
1726 Congratulations on your pregnancy. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
1727 Madam,your tinder date from last night! 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
1728 Waiter, there’s some food on my fly. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
1729 Best I ever had. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
1730 Enjoy your spouse 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
1731 Your date is here, ma’am. 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
1732 This revenge is being served hot. 1.2472 0.05600 89 71 14 4
1733 But, was it good for you? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
1734 Thou art not done, for I have more. 1.2472 0.05824 89 72 12 5
1735 Are you sure it’s Kosher? 1.2472 0.05367 89 70 16 3
1736 “It was killed humanely…no pesticides. 1.2472 0.05124 89 69 18 2
1737 He was my favorite. 1.2471 0.05268 85 66 17 2
1738 Madame, as we say here at Chez Mantis, good in bed, now eat the head.” 1.2471 0.05268 85 66 17 2
1739 A table for one, I presume. 1.2471 0.05775 85 68 13 4
1740 Surprised? 1.2471 0.05527 85 67 15 3
1741 How did you know I liked Fred? 1.2471 0.05527 85 67 15 3
1742 He doesn’t look well done to me. 1.2471 0.05527 85 67 15 3
1743 He wanted you to have a tasty head start on your maternity diet. 1.2471 0.05527 85 67 15 3
1744 In a white wine reduction with shallots, la tête de l’amoureux. 1.2469 0.05701 81 64 14 3
1745 He was a sweet husband. Bring me the salt. 1.2469 0.05424 81 63 16 2
1746 I am the Head Waiter. Bon appetite! 1.2469 0.05701 81 64 14 3
1747 Just how you like your mates…… with their head on a platter. 1.2469 0.05966 81 65 12 4
1748 Nothing like dinner with an old flame 1.2468 0.06175 77 62 11 4
1749 It’s very popular. .. A favorite with our feminist clientele 1.2468 0.06175 77 62 11 4
1750 I was looking for some wings and legs. 1.2466 0.06101 73 58 12 3
1751 Natural Selection at its finest 1.2466 0.06405 73 59 10 4
1752 And may I suggest the bittersweet Lover’s chocolate for dessert. 1.2466 0.06101 73 58 12 3
1753 Madame, Monsieur a la carte. 1.2466 0.05780 73 57 14 2
1754 Madame, I present your
catch of the day. Bon appetit.
1.2466 0.06695 73 60 8 5
1755 Ahhhh, Madame…….we thought it was only an urban myth. 1.2466 0.05780 73 57 14 2
1756 Give me a moment to say Grace…

Hi Grace !

Bob Murphy

Aurora IL

1.2464 0.06660 69 56 9 4
1757 Oh dear. We wondered what happened to Uncle Alfred. 1.2464 0.05986 69 54 13 2
1758 …and now for the pièce de résistance of your romantic dinner for one. 1.2464 0.06660 69 56 9 4
1759 He’s perfect! 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
1760 No fava beans? 1.2462 0.06214 65 51 12 2
1761 He looks so peaceful… and delicious. 1.2458 0.04652 118 93 21 4
1762 Jack was so romantic His last wish was to give me a little head 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1763 The chef tried to make him appear asleep. He was terribly effective don’t you think? 1.2456 0.04755 114 90 20 4
1764 And, for the main course, Husband a L’Orange. 1.2456 0.05071 114 92 16 6
1765 Your dinner date Madame. 1.2455 0.05354 110 90 13 7
1766 Head of ex for you, Madam. 1.2455 0.05354 110 90 13 7
1767 Compliments of the gentleman who was at the bar. 1.2455 0.05196 110 89 15 6
1768 Your husband wanted to see you one last time 1.2453 0.05159 106 85 16 5
1769 A special dish to assure a healthy pregnancy 1.2453 0.05159 106 85 16 5
1770 It’s been a pleasure serving you and your husband tonight 1.2453 0.04798 106 83 20 3
1771 George? 1.2451 0.05474 102 83 13 6
1772 It’s always a pleasure to host a second date. 1.2451 0.04712 102 79 21 2
1773 He said it was love at first sight 1.2451 0.05294 102 82 15 5
1774 Madam’s mate on a plate. 1.2449 0.05037 98 77 18 3
1775 Why don’t you spell it ‘Preying’? 1.2449 0.04824 98 76 20 2
1776 Prepared especially for you, madam, steamed ex-husband. 1.2449 0.05439 98 79 14 5
1777 It was prepared ahead. 1.2449 0.05242 98 78 16 4
1778 Voila! The head of John the Mantis, Madame Salome! 1.2449 0.05242 98 78 16 4
1779 The February 15th special madam. 1.2449 0.05242 98 78 16 4
1780 Enjoy your Dinner Date mademoiselle 1.2449 0.04381 147 118 22 7
1781 Too soon? 1.2449 0.05242 98 78 16 4
1782 For what we are about to receive… 1.2449 0.05439 98 79 14 5
1783 Eating alone, I presume. 1.2449 0.05439 98 79 14 5
1784 You snooze, you lose! 1.2447 0.05387 94 75 15 4
1785 And WHAT, pray tell, is this? I said I expected my mate would be served late, not on a plate!” 1.2447 0.05596 94 76 13 5
1786 What sort of savage would eat it raw? 1.2444 0.05978 90 74 10 6
1787 I said pudding not Putin! 1.2444 0.05314 90 71 16 3
1788 I was expecting him for dinner, but. .. .. . 1.2444 0.05765 90 73 12 5
1789 Just leave it a few minutes mam-
Revenge is a dish best eaten cold
1.2444 0.05074 90 70 18 2
1790 Husband #4 on a bed of amaranth seeds, medium rare. 1.2444 0.05314 90 71 16 3
1791 During our prior encounter he insisted that I give him head. It’s only fair that he return the favor. 1.2444 0.05544 90 72 14 4
1792 Shall I charge to Monsieur’s card? 1.2444 0.05314 90 71 16 3
1793 Your babydaddy, madame. 1.2442 0.05214 86 67 17 2
1794 By the way, his name was Larry 1.2442 0.05949 86 70 11 5
1795 We’ve saved you the bad sex. 1.2442 0.05715 86 69 13 4
1796 I hope he’s as good for dinner as he was in the sack. 1.2442 0.05715 86 69 13 4
1797 ARBY’S! WE HAVE THE MEATS. 1.2442 0.04945 86 66 19 1
1798 Your husband, Madam, aux frites avec Hollandaise. 1.2442 0.05949 86 70 11 5
1799 Your honeymoon, madame. 1.2442 0.05715 86 69 13 4
1800 Ahhh. He was a fine lover. 1.2442 0.05214 86 67 17 2
1801 Head of mantis lightly sauteed with rounds of new potato simmered in mantis blood 1.2442 0.05470 86 68 15 3
1802 Your last night’s hook-up, m’am. 1.2442 0.04945 86 66 19 1
1803 I asked about the cuisine, I don’t want to eat my cousin. 1.2442 0.05470 86 68 15 3
1804 I understand you’re eating for two now. 1.2442 0.05214 86 67 17 2
1805 I see your date last night went well 1.2442 0.05470 86 68 15 3
1806 The what to expect when you’re expecting special 1.2439 0.05366 82 64 16 2
1807 I told him we didn’t have to wait until we were married. 1.2439 0.05900 82 66 12 4
1808 Of course this means the Valentine’s Couples Discount no longer applies 1.2439 0.05900 82 66 12 4
1809 I don’t usually do this on the first date.. . 1.2439 0.06150 82 67 10 5
1810 This should come as no surprise. 1.2439 0.06150 82 67 10 5
1811 Our very best Madame, your Impregnator on a Plate 1.2439 0.05900 82 66 12 4
1812 Ohhhhhh honhonhonhon! Eeere eeezzze for youuu ze head of your ex loveaaarre! Zeees is a custom forre youuu just laaike smoking and having zeeee affairs eeezz for moi!!!! 1.2439 0.05900 82 66 12 4
1813 This is the house definition of Self-Serve 1.2439 0.05639 82 65 14 3
1814 John Doe in wine sauce, Madame. 1.2439 0.05900 82 66 12 4
1815 Your date, cooked as you wished. 1.2436 0.06370 78 64 9 5
1816 Oh! Darling! 1.2436 0.05531 78 61 15 2
1817 I plan to give both the chef and Match.com a five star review. 1.2436 0.04892 78 59 19 0
1818 May I present “Revenge” – served hot at madame’s request. Bon appetit. 1.2436 0.05531 78 61 15 2
1819 You bastard, that’s Larry. 1.2436 0.06103 78 63 11 4
1820 Are you sure this is organic grass fed? 1.2436 0.05531 78 61 15 2
1821 Heads up! It’s hot’! 1.2436 0.05221 78 60 17 1
1822 To love and to serve, I think the saying goes. 1.2436 0.05531 78 61 15 2
1823 Alas, poor Yorick! I gnawed him well. 1.2436 0.06626 78 65 7 6
1824 Your lover, I mean dinner,ma’am. 1.2436 0.05824 78 62 13 3
1825 Please,there are cookies in my dish. 1.2436 0.06103 78 63 11 4
1826 ♫“Oh, Manty, Well you came and you gave without taking.”♫ 1.2436 0.05824 78 62 13 3
1827 Locally grown, harvested, and decapitated. 1.2432 0.06327 74 60 10 4
1828 Likely won’t be going to dinner together again. 1.2432 0.04992 111 89 17 5
1829 Get it? Because a praying mantis eats the head of its mate after they bang. This mantis just had sex and is going to eat the head. There’s really no use to a caption, the joke is self-contained in the drawing. What am I doing here? 1.2432 0.06027 74 59 12 3
1830 I’m a waiter from the future. This is your own head. Enjoy. 1.2432 0.05378 74 57 16 1
1831 This is outrageous. I’d like to speak with the head chef.” 1.2432 0.05378 74 57 16 1
1832 Your special order, ma’am. It’s in season. 1.2432 0.05711 74 58 14 2
1833 Last dates are always so awkward. 1.2432 0.06027 74 59 12 3
1834 Eh Voila, Madame, notre spécialité,
‘Tete de Mari, en Croute”.
Bon appetite!
1.2430 0.05285 107 87 14 6
1835 Madam, your husband a la carte. 1.2430 0.05116 107 86 16 5
1836 Et voila, the husband, Madame. 1.2430 0.05449 107 88 12 7
1837 Jiminy is served. 1.2429 0.06251 70 56 11 3
1838 Well, he did say he’d cover dinner. 1.2429 0.06574 70 57 9 4
1839 Your husband’s head, cooked as you requested. 1.2427 0.04871 103 81 19 3
1840 Madam; I present: your husband. 1.2427 0.05248 103 83 15 5
1841 Mantis Dates. 1.2427 0.04871 103 81 19 3
1842 Tête la John the Baptiste. 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1843 Prepared as ordered, Madam. Enjoy! 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1844 We made sure it wasn’t one of your relatives 1.2424 0.06499 66 53 10 3
1845 If he didn’t cheat on me, he would be dining with me. 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1846 Well…hello lover!”

Steve Barber, Sequim, Washingto

1.2424 0.05578 99 81 12 6
1847 More potatoes, please. I’m eating for 300. 1.2424 0.04992 99 78 18 3
1848 This is our “Newly Single” special 1.2424 0.05390 99 80 14 5
1849 The sex was “meh.” This better be good! 1.2421 0.05337 95 76 15 4
1850 For this evening’s entree, the head of your former lover. Normally, I would suggest a wine pairing, but since you are now expecting, I’ll defer. 1.2421 0.04899 95 74 19 2
1851 But I wanted the ears and the tail! 1.2421 0.05122 95 75 17 3
1852 When you’ve had enough, say Uncle. 1.2421 0.05337 95 76 15 4
1853 Why is my husband always late for dinner? 1.2421 0.05337 95 76 15 4
1854 Heads! You win. Rare, OK? 1.2421 0.05337 95 76 15 4
1855 Ah, “La tete d’amour.” Merci!! 1.2421 0.05122 95 75 17 3
1856 Picky as he was, I think he would have preferred more garnish. 1.2418 0.05263 91 72 16 3
1857 It’s nice to have someone do this for me for a change. 1.2418 0.05708 91 74 12 5
1858 You’re a very sexy girl Mrs. McMantis. This is the fifth time this week that you’ve brought in a new husband for dinner. Enjoy! 1.2418 0.05263 91 72 16 3
1859 Madame, to celebrate your Consummé-tion… 1.2418 0.04776 91 70 20 1
1860 Oh no he is not DAVE i am sure and i were not drunk during foreplay . 1.2418 0.05263 91 72 16 3
1861 Will this be on separate checks? 1.2418 0.05708 91 74 12 5
1862 Your sister send her regards. 1.2418 0.05263 91 72 16 3
1863 That’ll teach him to cheat… 1.2418 0.05918 91 75 10 6
1864 I’ve been preying for this moment for a long time! 1.2418 0.05490 91 73 14 4
1865 Your appetizer, Madame 1.2414 0.05656 87 70 13 4
1866 This way you don’t have to dine alone! 1.2414 0.05414 87 69 15 3
1867 Roasting was the right suggestion, you’re the best head waiter. 1.2414 0.04895 87 67 19 1
1868 This is from the gentleman at the bar. 1.2414 0.05656 87 70 13 4
1869 ‘Revenge on a plate’, as you requested sir. 1.2414 0.05414 87 69 15 3
1870 And he thought He was getting head 1.2414 0.05284 116 96 12 8
1871 The chef thinks you’ll find this course particularly satisfying. 1.2410 0.06320 83 69 8 6
1872 There anyone I know in there? 1.2410 0.06320 83 69 8 6
1873 This is my favorite family restaurant 1.2410 0.05579 83 66 14 3
1874 He’s never been more appealing ! 1.2410 0.05579 83 66 14 3
1875 I did that. And you’re serving it to me?!? Puu-lease? 1.2410 0.05836 83 67 12 4
1876 He has always been such. a good provider. 1.2410 0.06083 83 68 10 5
1877 Irving? 1.2410 0.05836 83 67 12 4
1878 Compliments of your date. 1.2410 0.05836 83 67 12 4
1879 How did you know? I always get a head of myself! 1.2410 0.05836 83 67 12 4
1880 Aah, the perfect end to a perfect date. 1.2410 0.05836 83 67 12 4
1881 In a manner of speaking; the climax. 1.2407 0.04720 108 85 20 3
1882 Hope he found it worth losing his head over! 1.2407 0.05073 108 87 16 5
1883 Ok, Lady. I’ll take it back. Don’t bite my head off! 1.2405 0.05758 79 63 13 3
1884 Your Alfredo Garcia, Mr. Peckinpah 1.2405 0.05758 79 63 13 3
1885 He’s even more handsome than his Tinder photo. 1.2405 0.05758 79 63 13 3
1886 Here you go ma’am. Your ex, Benedict. 1.2405 0.05469 79 62 15 2
1887 Who’s whose Daddy now, you horny old bastard? 1.2405 0.06033 79 64 11 4
1888 Doesn’t Madame agree that the guillotine is more humane? 1.2405 0.05469 79 62 15 2
1889 Just curious, but where did you source tonight’s dinner? Asking for a friend. 1.2405 0.06033 79 64 11 4
1890 Your brother-in-law, madam. 1.2404 0.04830 104 82 19 3
1891 We tried to maintain the smile on his face. 1.2404 0.05202 104 84 15 5
1892 Served cold, as you requested. 1.2404 0.05020 104 83 17 4
1893 Tonight’s specials focus on the theme is “Remembering your roots: Head edition.” 1.2400 0.05955 75 60 12 3
1894 A serving of your lover that lost his head over you. 1.2400 0.05315 75 58 16 1
1895 Frank! 1.2400 0.04948 100 79 18 3
1896 Yes, it’s locally sourced. He was our busboy last week. 1.2400 0.05341 100 81 14 5
1897 Oh, John! You’ve NEVER looked so delicious! 1.2400 0.05644 75 59 14 2
1898 If I may say, an excellent pairing for your wine 1.2400 0.05315 75 58 16 1
1899 Dinner, yes: divorce, no. 1.2400 0.05955 75 60 12 3
1900 Here’s to hoping he is better the second time. 1.2400 0.05955 75 60 12 3
1901 The entire mind set
On a silver platter
1.2400 0.04948 100 79 18 3
1902 Bon Appetit!!

Did Madam enjoy the foreplay?

1.2400 0.05644 75 59 14 2
1903 He lost his head over me. 1.2400 0.04740 100 78 20 2
1904 Oh no…never cooked, thank you. He must still be alive. 1.2400 0.05955 75 60 12 3
1905 Here’s your beefcake Wellington. 1.2400 0.05527 100 82 12 6
1906 This is the best date I’ve ever been on. 1.2397 0.05119 121 100 13 8
1907 Your first course. The rest of your mate is in the stew. 1.2396 0.05075 96 76 17 3
1908 …and for tonight’s Succubus Special, your lover’s head a la carte!” 1.2396 0.05075 96 76 17 3
1909 It appears that your husband changed his mind and will be joining you for dinner. 1.2396 0.05287 96 77 15 4
1910 What made you think I was gay, Pierre? 1.2396 0.05287 96 77 15 4
1911 Your husband, as requested, medium-rare. 1.2396 0.05287 96 77 15 4
1912 Had no idea he would cook up so nicely when I mated him! 1.2396 0.05490 96 78 13 5
1913 He hopes you have a safe pregnancy 1.2396 0.05490 96 78 13 5
1914 You prepared him well! Complements to the chief. 1.2396 0.05075 96 76 17 3
1915 Mort looks just like himself. 1.2396 0.05075 96 76 17 3
1916 I think revenge served cold is overrated. 1.2396 0.05287 96 77 15 4
1917 Fresh today, but you already knew that. 1.2396 0.05075 96 76 17 3
1918 All she ever wanted from Larry was a little head. 1.2394 0.06489 71 58 9 4
1919 Ah! My preying man, this…! 1.2394 0.05836 71 56 13 2
1920 HE LOOKS LIKE HE’S ONLY SLEEPING! 1.2394 0.06172 71 57 11 3
1921 Your husband’s last words were bon appetit. 1.2393 0.04646 117 93 20 4
1922 When I said I would have his head on a platter, I was only speaking metaphorically. 1.2391 0.05212 92 73 16 3
1923 Tell me what you eat, and I will tell you what you are. 1.2391 0.05436 92 74 14 4
1924 The croque monsieur you ordered. 1.2391 0.05651 92 75 12 5
1925 We are celebrating our third date! 1.2391 0.05651 92 75 12 5
1926 Salomantis 1.2388 0.05663 67 52 14 1
1927 Complements of your husband. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1928 Your date arrived early. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1929 If this one isn’t to your liking, you may chose from the seven remaining in the duffle bag. 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1930 Your former lover, Madame. 1.2386 0.05598 88 71 13 4
1931 Today’s special، your main Ex-course.Bon Appétit! 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1932 And for Madame, the honermooners’ special 1.2386 0.05359 88 70 15 3
1933 Well done,as usual Madam 1.2386 0.05110 88 69 17 2
1934 If madame cannot finish all the courses, may I suggest a body bag? 1.2386 0.05826 88 72 11 5
1935 Wonderful, I’m famished. It’s been a busy afternoon. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
1936 Wait. We were supposed to have sex first. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
1937 I bet he’ll think twice the next time he tries to mate with me!!” 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
1938 And may I say congratulations on your conception. 1.2381 0.06017 84 69 10 5
1939 This next course is to die for. But then again, so are you. 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
1940 It’s locally sourced 1.2381 0.06017 84 69 10 5
1941 I pray this meets your standards. 1.2381 0.04972 84 65 18 1
1942 Tonight’s two-for-one special. 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
1943 So, you’re the head waiter! 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
1944 Condolences of the chef. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
1945 Madam Mantis, your husband. 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
1946 He thought it was worth it getting laid. 1.2381 0.04972 84 65 18 1
1947 guess the divorce didn’t go as planned 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
1948 Nope! That’s too well done! 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
1949 I have always wanted to pick their brain 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
1950 May I present your late husband’s favorite dish? 1.2381 0.06285 63 50 11 2
1951 Voila; the chef’s deconstructed mantis with potato foam droplets and nano-greens. 1.2381 0.05773 84 68 12 4
1952 Your dinner date just arrived. 1.2381 0.05332 105 86 13 6
1953 I did not say Ye,I said yes. 1.2381 0.05253 84 66 16 2
1954 It’s a coin toss! 1.2381 0.05519 84 67 14 3
1955 You know what they say, two heads are better than 1 1.2376 0.04699 101 79 20 2
1956 Vanity with a side of perspective. 1.2376 0.05293 101 82 14 5
1957 Will the rest of your husband be joining you? 1.2376 0.05103 101 81 16 4
1958 I’ll need a “doggie bag” to take home to his kids 1.2376 0.05103 101 81 16 4
1959 You sure have a knack for attracting these one night stands 1.2376 0.05103 101 81 16 4
1960 I asked for my mate served medium well, not medium rare. 1.2375 0.05409 80 63 15 2
1961 That concludes our instant pot demonstration, which I’d like to point out is a handy appliance for the newly single. 1.2375 0.05108 80 62 17 1
1962 I assume you’ll be taking care of the check instead of Mr. Mantis. 1.2375 0.05108 80 62 17 1
1963 Congratulations, Madam. 1.2375 0.05409 80 63 15 2
1964 Best wishes on your wedding day! 1.2375 0.06225 80 66 9 5
1965 Oh, that’s perfect! Just put the rest in a doggy bag! 1.2375 0.05965 80 65 11 4
1966 I thought this came with wings on the side. 1.2375 0.05108 80 62 17 1
1967 Perfect, could I also get a side of flies? 1.2375 0.05409 80 63 15 2
1968 Your braised worthless bastard, madam. 1.2375 0.05694 80 64 13 3
1969 Madame, just the way you like it with a hint of coriander. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1970 Thank you, Sal. I really thought he was my forever-mantis, but he just couldn’t put the seat down. 1.2371 0.05029 97 77 17 3
1971 The chef has assured it is your ex. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1972 The chef sends his congratulations on your successful pregnancy. 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1973 Bedroom-to-table dining 1.2371 0.05439 97 79 13 5
1974 This one did not look like his profile picture. 1.2368 0.05884 76 61 12 3
1975 I think you’ll find it far preferable to a cigarette. 1.2368 0.05183 114 94 13 7
1976 Mmmmm. Alfredo Garcia alfredo 1.2368 0.06453 76 63 8 5
1977 Oh, he was so sweet! 1.2368 0.04909 76 58 18 0
1978 Phyllis wondered if Harold would be as good on the table as he was in bed. 1.2368 0.05578 76 60 14 2
1979 As ordered ma’am, your husband, well done in. 1.2368 0.05031 114 93 15 6
1980 kanbilism 1.2368 0.05578 76 60 14 2
1981 Girl’s night! 1.2368 0.05884 76 61 12 3
1982 Swarm to table. 1.2366 0.05162 93 74 16 3
1983 It was love at first bite. 1.2366 0.04930 93 73 18 2
1984 Only the best for our repeat customers, Madame. 1.2366 0.05596 93 76 12 5
1985 Now that’s what I call a hot date 1.2366 0.05383 93 75 14 4
1986 I hear he spoke very fondly of you. Bon appetit. 1.2361 0.05764 72 57 13 2
1987 Mr. and Mrs. Mantis try an upscale restaurant for date night. 1.2361 0.06094 72 58 11 3
1988 Your dining companion has arrived. 1.2361 0.06094 72 58 11 3
1989 Et voila – Dîner de famille. 1.2361 0.06407 72 59 9 4
1990 Voila, one Afterglow Special for mademoiselle. 1.2361 0.05414 72 56 15 1
1991 Your husband is ready for dinner madam. 1.2360 0.05767 89 73 11 5
1992 Don’t mind if I do. 1.2360 0.04526 89 68 21 0
1993 He promised me romance and a good meal… 1.2360 0.05767 89 73 11 5
1994 The appetizer was just foreplay to giving you… 1.2360 0.05767 89 73 11 5
1995 Your copain etouffee madam. 1.2360 0.05541 89 72 13 4
1996 Harold wasn’t the ideal romantic companion for Shirley. But in the end, she figured out how to make the relationship work for her. 1.2360 0.05767 89 73 11 5
1997 Your ex, madame, medium rare. 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
1998 Way to get ahead! 1.2360 0.05059 89 70 17 2
1999 No caption! 1.2360 0.05984 89 74 9 6
2000 Is it fresh or is it frozen? 1.2360 0.05305 89 71 15 3
2001 Congratulations on the new family. 1.2360 0.04800 89 69 19 1
2002 He’s never looked so delectible! 1.2358 0.04354 106 82 23 1
2003 Madame, congratulations may be in order. 1.2358 0.04935 106 85 17 4
2004 Your mating dance was delightful madam, and I hope your entrée is also. 1.2358 0.04483 123 98 21 4
2005 Allow me to present you madam, the head of your new family 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2006 Um, I said “Dinner Special” not, “Donner Special” 1.2353 0.06327 68 55 10 3
2007 And after the amuse bouche, there will be the egg course. 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2008 Will your husband be joining you? 1.2353 0.04922 85 66 18 1
2009 He was a great date 1.2353 0.04862 102 81 18 3
2010 Perhaps madam would care to accompany her mate with a nice pinot grisly? 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
2011 You give some, you get some. 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2012 Ohhhh, Jeeves, I’d like a cigarette first. 1.2353 0.06327 68 55 10 3
2013 For better or for worst” 1.2353 0.06183 85 71 8 6
2014 The gentleman at the other table sends this with his complements. 1.2353 0.05058 102 82 16 4
2015 I loved him as a mate and I love him on my plate! 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2016 Here is the dish you preyed for. 1.2353 0.05058 102 82 16 4
2017 Fly’s time 1.2353 0.04658 102 80 20 2
2018 And he picked up the check already. 1.2353 0.05198 85 67 16 2
2019 Ah, Monsieur. It is excellent with the vintage you ordered. 1.2353 0.04658 102 80 20 2
2020 I asked for a dish that was ‘tender,’ not ‘Tinder.’ 1.2353 0.05461 85 68 14 3
2021 A la carte, Madam 1.2353 0.05712 85 69 12 4
2022 Alpha females know how to get a head in life. 1.2353 0.05952 85 70 10 5
2023 Kevin looks so peaceful…tasty, but peaceful 1.2353 0.05970 68 54 12 2
2024 You said this was a meatless entree! 1.2353 0.05590 68 53 14 1
2025 That reminds me of George. Something about the eyes… 1.2347 0.05389 98 80 13 5
2026 Bon appetit along with my condolences. 1.2346 0.05898 81 66 11 4
2027 Sigh…another positive test and another 80 eggs I have to raise alone 1.2346 0.05630 81 65 13 3
2028 Ah yes,Vladimir I knew him well !! 1.2346 0.05630 81 65 13 3
2029 Revenge is a dish best served cold! 1.2346 0.05349 81 64 15 2
2030 Such a fabulous lover, you deserve haute cuisine treatment. 1.2346 0.05053 81 63 17 1
2031 Monsieur, you assume so much! 1.2346 0.05053 81 63 17 1
2032 Madam is eating for two hundred now. 1.2346 0.06154 81 67 9 5
2033 Love is always better the second time around. 1.2346 0.05898 81 66 11 4
2034 The settlement specifically included the thorax. 1.2346 0.05630 81 65 13 3
2035 Yes, please take it off the exoskeleton. 1.2346 0.05898 81 66 11 4
2036 Our dinner date didn’t work out, so this is just desserts. 1.2346 0.05053 81 63 17 1
2037 Seconds? 1.2346 0.05053 81 63 17 1
2038 Compliments of the real mother for your surrogate services! 1.2346 0.05630 81 65 13 3
2039 Madam, your final course for this evening. 1.2346 0.05630 81 65 13 3
2040 Ah, the post-coitus special … love it. 1.2344 0.06585 64 52 9 3
2041 You ordered your enemy’s head on a platter. 1.2344 0.06197 64 51 11 2
2042 You just don’t get it, do you? I’m an aliveist — I only eat it while it’s still alive. 1.2340 0.04884 94 74 18 2
2043 How about a head start? 1.2340 0.05332 94 76 14 4
2044 Will the rest of your husband be joining you, Madam? 1.2340 0.04884 94 74 18 2
2045 The chef hopes you enjoy the meal with your husband. 1.2340 0.04884 94 74 18 2
2046 The only way I’ll swallow my husband 1.2340 0.05332 94 76 14 4
2047 Oh dear, I fear his eyes are bigger than my stomach. 1.2340 0.05542 94 77 12 5
2048 AMUSE BOUCHE 1.2340 0.05542 94 77 12 5
2049 Your “Honeymoon Special”, Madam. 1.2338 0.06102 77 63 10 4
2050 Does Madame wish to say grace first? 1.2338 0.05816 77 62 12 3
2051 he liked head 1.2338 0.05514 77 61 14 2
2052 You know what they say about revenge. 1.2338 0.05816 77 62 12 3
2053 No, no, I wanted my current husband’s head, this is my first husband’s head. Send it back. 1.2338 0.06102 77 63 10 4
2054 You said you wanted to sit at the head table, sir. This is the head! 1.2338 0.05514 77 61 14 2
2055 Why is it cooked? 1.2338 0.06102 77 63 10 4
2056 Mademoiselle, your superorder: Dictyopteran Pot-au-Feu. 1.2338 0.05514 77 61 14 2
2057 Why aren’t they moving? 1.2338 0.06102 77 63 10 4
2058 His last words were, ‘Was it good for you, too?’ 1.2338 0.06102 77 63 10 4
2059 I’m so glad I ordered ahead. 1.2338 0.05816 77 62 12 3
2060 He wanted you to have it 1.2336 0.04893 107 86 17 4
2061 The father of your children. Bon appetite! 1.2333 0.05253 90 72 15 3
2062 This will likely get you blocked on your dating site 1.2333 0.05253 90 72 15 3
2063 I think I’m in the wrong cartoon. 1.2333 0.05708 90 74 11 5
2064 As requested, madam, your usual family special. 1.2333 0.05708 90 74 11 5
2065 Al Dente, madame 1.2333 0.05485 90 73 13 4
2066 Did you think “you are what you eat” was just a saying? 1.2333 0.05253 90 72 15 3
2067 Would a Donner Party joke be in bad taste? 1.2333 0.05708 90 74 11 5
2068 He had such unrealistic expectations for the reconciliation. 1.2333 0.05253 90 72 15 3
2069 Would you like to add freshly ground pepper, Madame? 1.2333 0.05485 90 73 13 4
2070 Thank you for staying at our bed and breakfast.” 1.2333 0.05708 90 74 11 5
2071 Ain’t love grand? 1.2330 0.04618 103 81 20 2
2072 The chef’s head on a platter, as you requested. 1.2329 0.06621 73 61 7 5
2073 Happy Father’s Day ! 1.2329 0.06327 73 60 9 4
2074 I hope it’s al dente. 1.2329 0.06327 73 60 9 4
2075 Your lover said to start without him. 1.2329 0.05694 73 58 13 2
2076 On a silver platter, as per your request. 1.2328 0.04952 116 95 15 6
2077 Your prayer is answered, Madam. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2078 There is risk that you maybe getting ahead of yourself. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2079 Am I that predictable? 1.2326 0.04872 86 67 18 1
2080 He finally brought something to the table. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2081 Madame, your date arrived. 1.2326 0.05889 86 71 10 5
2082 Do you have any Tabasco? 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2083 Your honeymoon is over. 1.2326 0.05145 86 68 16 2
2084 Not you again? 1.2326 0.05404 86 69 14 3
2085 I warned him not to cross me. 1.2323 0.05339 99 81 13 5
2086 Thanks for closing his eyes, Luigi. It’s like he’s looking at me the whole time, you know? 1.2323 0.05339 99 81 13 5
2087 No – I ordered the tail 1.2323 0.04725 99 78 19 2
2088 Insects are all the rage now. 1.2323 0.05142 99 80 15 4
2089 Mademoiselle, You are the first to enjoy our “you catch, we cook” special. Bon Appetite. 1.2323 0.04725 99 78 19 2
2090 No, I won’t eat that. I didn’t have sex with him. 1.2323 0.05142 99 80 15 4
2091 We’re out of grass-fed beef, so here’s beef-fed grasshopper. 1.2321 0.04909 112 91 16 5
2092 It’s a little hot headed. 1.2321 0.04909 112 91 16 5
2093 I thought he was inviting me out to dinner, not to be dinner. 1.2320 0.04419 125 100 21 4
2094 You must have been good–he still has a smile on his face! 1.2319 0.05892 69 55 12 2
2095 You know chef, since you came along, you’ve brought so much flavor to my love life. 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2096 Voila! I believe you’ve met. 1.2317 0.04999 82 64 17 1
2097 The fresher they get, the better I eat! 1.2317 0.04688 82 63 19 0
2098 His last request was to ask if it was good for you. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2099 Here’s lookin’ at you kid! 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2100 Al dente, as you requested, ma’am. 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2101 That’s not my husband… he was just the cute yard guy… 1.2317 0.05569 82 66 13 3
2102 Well it’s about time you showed up! We have 400 babies to raise! 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2103 Care for a tête-à-tête delight, Sir? 1.2317 0.05291 82 65 15 2
2104 Sometimes we crave the familiar. 1.2316 0.05489 95 78 12 5
2105 As you requested, revenge served piping hot. 1.2316 0.05281 95 77 14 4
2106 I’ve been waiting for this since the day he signed the prenup! 1.2316 0.05281 95 77 14 4
2107 He’s still so charming. 1.2316 0.05065 95 76 16 3
2108 I’ve been told that I am what I eat. 1.2316 0.04601 95 74 20 1
2109 I’m always so hungry after. 1.2316 0.05065 95 76 16 3
2110 The visible sense of betrayal in the eyes is where you get all the flavor 1.2316 0.04838 95 75 18 2
2111 Love can make us lose our heads sometimes. 1.2316 0.05065 95 76 16 3
2112 served at room temperature after mating as you requested 1.2315 0.04853 108 87 17 4
2113 And may I add, Ma’am, Congratulations on your divorce. 1.2308 0.05431 91 74 13 4
2114 Wait, I haven’t prayed. 1.2308 0.05451 78 62 14 2
2115 That looks a lot like my ex. 1.2308 0.05201 91 73 15 3
2116 Revenge is a dish best served gourmet. 1.2308 0.04579 104 82 20 2
2117 Well, this is awkward as that’s my husband. 1.2308 0.05451 78 62 14 2
2118 We’re out of the Alfredo Garcia. 1.2308 0.05431 91 74 13 4
2119 Yummm…home cooking! 1.2308 0.06112 65 52 11 2
2120 Madam, his lower body is being prepared for desert 1.2308 0.05748 78 63 12 3
2121 Oh, yeah! He’s hot! 1.2308 0.06112 65 52 11 2
2122 My last lover!…he did give good head. 1.2308 0.06301 78 65 8 5
2123 Eat Pray Love 1.2308 0.06301 78 65 8 5
2124 I just love when a dinner is served by the head waiter. 1.2308 0.05651 91 75 11 5
2125 So – honestly- without obscenity – what is it? 1.2308 0.05451 78 62 14 2
2126 An ingenious way to never dine alone, Madam. 1.2308 0.05748 78 63 12 3
2127 As you requested, his liver is also served with some fava beans and a nice chianti. 1.2308 0.05431 91 74 13 4
2128 Your mate on a plate as you ordered, madam” 1.2308 0.04441 91 70 21 0
2129 Alas, poor Yorick, I loved him. 1.2308 0.05333 104 86 12 6
2130 Your Roast Zelenskyy Mr. Putin. 1.2308 0.05748 78 63 12 3
2131 Yup, that’s him alright 1.2308 0.06301 78 65 8 5
2132 Your grilled boyfriend Ma’am. 1.2308 0.04801 78 60 18 0
2133 I see that tonight is a special occasion. 1.2308 0.04961 91 72 17 2
2134 Madam, after your main course, may I suggest our delicious pickle, banana, and ice cream souffle dessert. 1.2308 0.05451 78 62 14 2
2135 Was it good for you? 1.2308 0.06112 65 52 11 2
2136 I was wondering when my date will arrive. 1.2308 0.06112 65 52 11 2
2137 Honey! 1.2301 0.04534 113 90 20 3
2138 Quit kidding around and get back in your seat Lenny, I’m starving and want to order. 1.2301 0.04705 113 91 18 4
2139 I ordered the “praying” man – ’tis this it? 1.2300 0.05291 100 82 13 5
2140 Do you, Miss Mantis, take this man… 1.2300 0.04894 100 80 17 3
2141 And here is Madame’s freshly prepared Stu. 1.2299 0.04823 87 68 18 1
2142 The Divorcee Special. 1.2299 0.05827 87 72 10 5
2143 Chef’s special – your mate’s head on a silver platter. 1.2299 0.05593 87 71 12 4
2144 Madame, your husband said he’d be running late. 1.2299 0.04823 87 68 18 1
2145 We give good head. 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2146 I believe this is the mate you ordered. 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2147 Fresh off the thorax. 1.2299 0.05593 87 71 12 4
2148 I ordered him rare. This looks medium rare. 1.2299 0.04537 87 67 20 0
2149 Sooo…that swinging door wasn’t the men’s room? 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2150 I know this is a family restaurant, but this isn’t what I had in mind. 1.2299 0.05092 87 69 16 2
2151 Don’t worry, it’s 100% grass-fed. 1.2299 0.05593 87 71 12 4
2152 Sometimes revenge is best served hot. 1.2299 0.05827 87 72 10 5
2153 Your honeymoon dinner madame. 1.2299 0.05092 87 69 16 2
2154 i’m so glad I saved the head till last. Doesn’t he look peaceful? 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2155 Ah … the rewards of sexual conquest. 1.2299 0.05092 87 69 16 2
2156 And now, for the spouse de résistance! 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2157 Sure, the chef specializes in game. But the mating game? 1.2299 0.05593 87 71 12 4
2158 Et voila! The Spouse Special! 1.2299 0.05348 87 70 14 3
2159 We let him finish his cigarette first. 1.2297 0.06249 74 61 9 4
2160 Ton mari au jus, Madame. 1.2297 0.05286 74 58 15 1
2161 I need a spoon! 1.2297 0.05625 74 59 13 2
2162 I pray it’s just the way you like it, Madame–on a platter. 1.2297 0.05945 74 60 11 3
2163 I hope you enjoy your date. 1.2297 0.05945 74 60 11 3
2164 I can’t say I’m surprised he came so quickly. 1.2297 0.06249 74 61 9 4
2165 It appears your prayers have been answered. 1.2297 0.06249 74 61 9 4
2166 Yummy! Looks good enough to…oops. 1.2297 0.05286 74 58 15 1
2167 Ah! The father of my child at last. 1.2292 0.05437 96 79 12 5
2168 Your spouse de jour 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2169 Your love entree. 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
2170 Tete du petit ami, madam. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2171 He said to tell you that you were the love of his life. 1.2292 0.05017 96 77 16 3
2172 I always told him I wasn’t after his body and that I wouldn’t eat him alive…. 1.2292 0.04794 96 76 18 2
2173 Your side dish is now your main course. 1.2292 0.05231 96 78 14 4
2174 Would Madam like to meat her date? 1.2289 0.04946 83 65 17 1
2175 Leftovers???? 1.2289 0.04946 83 65 17 1
2176 You will recognize tonight’s offering from our “Special Pairings” menu. 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2177 Would you like to stay ahead in the mating game 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2178 Madame always enquires whether her mates are available for dinner. 1.2289 0.04946 83 65 17 1
2179 Most people request a cigarette. 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2180 Seems redundant actually. 1.2289 0.05235 83 66 15 2
2181 Gross! There’s potatoes on here. 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2182 It’s our Eat, Love, Praying Mantis special! 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2183 Your male, Mamdame. 1.2289 0.05769 83 68 11 4
2184 I said, “more bread!” 1.2289 0.05235 83 66 15 2
2185 Actually, I ordered the pike. 1.2289 0.05508 83 67 13 3
2186 He wasn’t all that special, really, in spite of your description. 1.2289 0.05235 83 66 15 2
2187 May he please you one more time. Filet of soulmate. 1.2289 0.06018 83 69 9 5
2188 I wasn’t ordering I simply said I was here ahead of time. 1.2289 0.04946 83 65 17 1
2189 And for you, madame, the monsieur. 1.2289 0.05235 83 66 15 2
2190 Your mate, medium rare, as you prefer them, Madame. 1.2289 0.04946 83 65 17 1
2191 He died happy, I presume? 1.2286 0.05817 70 56 12 2
2192 But he didn’t sleep with me. 1.2286 0.05110 105 86 14 5
2193 Whatever your issues, he ended up being a good provider.” 1.2286 0.05055 70 54 16 0
2194 First, let us pray 1.2286 0.06163 70 57 10 3
2195 Herbie was such a considerate lover 1.2283 0.04913 92 73 17 2
2196 Always good to see a familiar face!! 1.2283 0.04663 92 72 19 1
2197 And here we have tonight’s special at $60 a head… 1.2283 0.04913 92 73 17 2
2198 Thank you for removing the bones. 1.2283 0.05377 92 75 13 4
2199 Our anniversary special – enjoy! 1.2278 0.05961 79 65 10 4
2200 Oh my god, it’s the father of my children. 1.2278 0.05079 79 62 16 1
2201 I always thought “You are what you eat” was just an expression. 1.2278 0.05683 79 64 12 3
2202 His last request was to wish you bon appétit. 1.2278 0.05390 79 63 14 2
2203 I’m sorry we didn’t have a table for two, but I hope you will find this a satisfactory solution. 1.2278 0.05079 79 62 16 1
2204 Oh, I love it! 1.2278 0.05683 79 64 12 3
2205 Gerald L’Orange 1.2278 0.05683 79 64 12 3
2206 Alas, poor Yorick. You cooked him well. 1.2278 0.06483 79 67 6 6
2207 Oui Madame, you are what you eat! 1.2277 0.04423 101 79 21 1
2208 So I guess it’s true, I eat what I am. 1.2277 0.04850 101 81 17 3
2209 But Sir…that’s not him 1.2277 0.05050 101 82 15 4
2210 This feels right. 1.2277 0.05050 101 82 15 4
2211 Pray enjoy his tete de mantis, Madam. 1.2277 0.04642 101 80 19 2
2212 With compliments from the gentleman at the bar with the pointy neck. 1.2277 0.05428 101 84 11 6
2213 Here is the head you bit off your mate during mating sex, madame, grilled to a delicious medium rare, as you requested. Bon appetit! 1.2273 0.05041 88 70 16 2
2214 Treat or threat? 1.2273 0.05294 88 71 14 3
2215 Manny I hardly knew ye!” 1.2273 0.05535 88 72 12 4
2216 Your Mantis Mate Melange, Madam. 1.2273 0.05535 88 72 12 4
2217 And I didn’t even have to dance for it 1.2273 0.05766 88 73 10 5
2218 Here you are, Madame, compliments of the gentleman who was seated in the corner. 1.2273 0.06203 88 75 6 7
2219 As you requested, your mate on a silver platter 1.2273 0.05766 88 73 10 5
2220 Shall we pray? 1.2273 0.05041 88 70 16 2
2221 He’s even more handsome like this! 1.2273 0.05294 88 71 14 3
2222 Thank you, yes that’s my husband. 1.2273 0.05766 88 73 10 5
2223 I thought he’d be taller 1.2273 0.06028 66 53 11 2
2224 Your husband on a silver platter. I hope your final moments were pleasurable. 1.2273 0.05041 88 70 16 2
2225 He’s been 86’d, ma’am. 1.2273 0.06028 66 53 11 2
2226 Alas poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio. 1.2268 0.05582 97 81 10 6
2227 I said I’ll start with the bread. 1.2268 0.05386 97 80 12 5
2228 Don’t screw with me. 1.2268 0.05582 97 81 10 6
2229 your sautéed suitor as usual, madam 1.2268 0.04750 97 77 18 2
2230 I knew my husband would look more appealing on a platter! 1.2268 0.05182 97 79 14 4
2231 Well, I guess this is cheaper than a divorce . 1.2267 0.04867 75 58 17 0
2232 Freddy! I wonder what ever happened to you 1.2267 0.06173 75 62 9 4
2233 You will be dining alone again, madame? 1.2267 0.05558 75 60 13 2
2234 I suppose the rest of him will wind up as Monday’s special. 1.2267 0.05874 75 61 11 3
2235 We may not look alike, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup. 1.2267 0.05224 75 59 15 1
2236 Ah, my husband finally arrived! 1.2267 0.05874 75 61 11 3
2237 Ah, just the way I like it, no body. 1.2267 0.05874 75 61 11 3
2238 Now I understand why you requested a table for one. 1.2267 0.05224 75 59 15 1
2239 Your husband, Madame, a la meunière. 1.2267 0.05558 75 60 13 2
2240 One head served medium rare and endangered Ma’am. 1.2267 0.05224 75 59 15 1
2241 Mam, your Lovers Special is served 1.2262 0.05179 84 67 15 2
2242 Could I also order a side of fava beans and a nice Chianti? 1.2262 0.05952 84 70 9 5
2243 I asked for rare. He was clearly just average. 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2244 All my men end up the same way! 1.2262 0.05179 84 67 15 2
2245 Our Mother’s Day Special 1.2262 0.05179 84 67 15 2
2246 Husband Bolognese, Madame. 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2247 Shall I assume your husband won’t be dining with us? 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2248 Thanks for ordering ahead! I assume your date won’t be joining you? 1.2262 0.05449 84 68 13 3
2249 I offered him a prenup but he refused 1.2262 0.05706 84 69 11 4
2250 I told him one more time and I would have his head on a platter 1.2262 0.05179 84 67 15 2
2251 I was wondering why he never called me back. 1.2262 0.05179 84 67 15 2
2252 Was madam satisfied by the entree? 1.2261 0.04793 115 94 16 5
2253 The “Honeymoon Special”, madame. 1.2258 0.05325 93 76 13 4
2254 Yes, Ma’am; it is certified wild caught and humanely harvested. 1.2258 0.05100 93 75 15 3
2255 Satiated then poached, as usual, Madame. 1.2258 0.06264 62 50 10 2
2256 That’s why I made the reservation for one. 1.2258 0.05325 93 76 13 4
2257 Where are the good old days when you got to know them before. 1.2258 0.05325 93 76 13 4
2258 ”Your husband’s head lightly braised wth a trio of spring vegetables. Enjoy.’ 1.2258 0.05747 93 78 9 6
2259 Your latest lover-hopper, Madam. 1.2258 0.05100 93 75 15 3
2260 Your ex recommended washing him down with a 2019 Chablis. 1.2258 0.04619 93 73 19 1
2261 Your mate, Madame, severed by you, served without the body, as you like it. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2262 Actually madame, I am not the head waiter. 1.2255 0.05380 102 85 11 6
2263 Monsieur Mantis made it in time for dinner tonight. 1.2255 0.05006 102 83 15 4
2264 Do I look like a black widow to you? 1.2255 0.04386 102 80 21 1
2265 The chef would like to see you after. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2266 I think this outdoes the black widow spider. 1.2255 0.04808 102 82 17 3
2267 He did me once. Once. 1.2254 0.05382 71 56 14 1
2268 Oh and he did get the check first 1.2254 0.06084 71 58 10 3
2269 I’d like to say grace first! 1.2254 0.05743 71 57 12 2
2270 He left a note: ‘Next time let’s have sex after dinner.’ 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2271 I was wondering where that got to. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2272 Our romantic special! 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2273 As per your prenup, madam. 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2274 In keeping with tradition,may we present the first course for your private pleasure. The rest of the wedding party and your husband will arrive shortly. 1.2250 0.05618 80 65 12 3
2275 Divine retribution en place 1.2250 0.05329 80 64 14 2
2276 Just as your ordered, ma’am. Enjoy! 1.2247 0.04990 89 71 16 2
2277 Who doesn’t like a little head. 1.2247 0.04990 89 71 16 2
2278 For you, Madam, the newlywed special. 1.2247 0.05240 89 72 14 3
2279 Your Tinder Profile requested she be “hot” . 1.2247 0.04990 89 71 16 2
2280 Oh, please, I came here to have something I can’t do for myself! 1.2247 0.04728 89 70 18 1
2281 Ugh he’d kill me for pairing with white 1.2247 0.04990 89 71 16 2
2282 He only had eyes for you. 1.2247 0.05478 89 73 12 4
2283 Bon Appetit. Thanks for choosing our restaurant for your anniversary celebration. 1.2247 0.05478 89 73 12 4
2284 The chef followed an old family recipe. 1.2247 0.04728 89 70 18 1
2285 There he is! 1.2247 0.04728 89 70 18 1
2286 My husband always had great taste. 1.2247 0.05240 89 72 14 3
2287 Getting head. 1.2247 0.05478 89 73 12 4
2288 I meant grass fed. 1.2247 0.05478 89 73 12 4
2289 We vegetarians will put up with a lot; but I am not going to eat that! 1.2247 0.04990 89 71 16 2
2290 Your main course will be accompanied by an exquisite lack of bickering 1.2247 0.05240 89 72 14 3
2291 I can’t eat another bite. Seems my eyes are bigger than my stomach. 1.2247 0.05707 89 74 10 5
2292 Sorry for the wait. Thanks for ordering ahead. 1.2247 0.04728 89 70 18 1
2293 Al Dente as you prefer, madame. 1.2245 0.04925 98 79 16 3
2294 Trust madam finds the meal satisfactory 1.2245 0.05135 98 80 14 4
2295 That’s fly…. 1.2245 0.05335 98 81 12 5
2296 Well at least I wasn’t stood up 1.2245 0.04925 98 79 16 3
2297 He did say he’d die for this meal. 1.2245 0.04707 98 78 18 2
2298 Yes madame, all of our mates are grass-fed. 1.2245 0.04925 98 79 16 3
2299 He was a fine man, Madame. 1.2239 0.05131 67 52 15 0
2300 I knew it was love at first sight 1.2237 0.05803 76 62 11 3
2301 Madam,your husband sends his best 1.2237 0.05493 76 61 13 2
2302 Head! Marvellous. I usually only get this on my birthday. 1.2237 0.06098 76 63 9 4
2303 Beware the Ides of Munch! 1.2237 0.05803 76 62 11 3
2304 Voila! His head on a platter,Madsme. 1.2237 0.05493 76 61 13 2
2305 It’s your husband 1.2237 0.05803 76 62 11 3
2306 Presenting husband à la mode – all of the flavour and none of the committment. 1.2237 0.05803 76 62 11 3
2307 This better be more pleasing than our first encounter. 1.2235 0.05125 85 68 15 2
2308 Your Ladies’ Night Special, and the chef sends her regards. 1.2235 0.05391 85 69 13 3
2309 Your husband is finally ready. 1.2235 0.05125 85 68 15 2
2310 May I speak to the head chef please? 1.2235 0.04546 85 66 19 0
2311 It was good while it lasted Larry. 1.2235 0.05125 85 68 15 2
2312 He looks just as good as he did the day we met. 1.2235 0.05391 85 69 13 3
2313 Try to finish up before the Health Department arrives. 1.2235 0.05391 85 69 13 3
2314 You loved it once. 1.2235 0.05391 85 69 13 3
2315 I ordered a head of lettuce, but I suppose I could give this a try. 1.2235 0.05391 85 69 13 3
2316 Never has an ex-lover been so well prepared. 1.2234 0.05691 94 79 9 6
2317 Oh, this is such a romantic dinner! 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2318 Just what I was praying for. 1.2234 0.05691 94 79 9 6
2319 Of course, you already knew he was a tasty treat. 1.2234 0.05273 94 77 13 4
2320 Well as they say, “You are what you eat!”
“Oh of course, I told him that he was coming with me to dinner but I didn’t want to say what was on the menu~I wanted it to be a surprise.”
1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2321 Finally, he wrote me a funny caption. 1.2234 0.05691 94 79 9 6
2322 Grass-fed, as usual, Mr. Hopper. 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2323 Your date has arrived madam… Well done. 1.2234 0.04820 94 75 17 2
2324 Your husband Mrs. M, medium rare! 1.2234 0.05052 94 76 15 3
2325 It’ll only cost YOU an arm and a leg. 1.2234 0.05486 94 78 11 5
2326 And for the main course, your husband! 1.2233 0.04348 103 81 21 1
2327 Madam, your dinner guest in served…… 1.2233 0.04962 103 84 15 4
2328 I hope His head is better today… 1.2233 0.04962 103 84 15 4
2329 I knew him well. 1.2233 0.04562 103 82 19 2
2330 Yum! Just what I was praying for. 1.2233 0.04962 103 84 15 4
2331 Voilà, la tête tatin. 1.2232 0.04865 112 92 15 5
2332 The appetizer looks perfect. And he said I would never have him for dinner! 1.2222 0.05672 72 58 12 2
2333 Madam, you’re husband is served. 1.2222 0.04969 81 64 16 1
2334 Oh, I remember this dish so fondly! 1.2222 0.04969 81 64 16 1
2335 LOVE!
EAT!
PREY!
(Memoir of a praying mantis)
1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
2336 Oh good, I was craving a little head. 1.2222 0.05286 99 82 12 5
2337 I am praying, man, ‘tis good. 1.2222 0.05556 81 66 12 3
2338 Nonsense. Everybody likes a little head. 1.2222 0.05151 108 90 12 6
2339 Have they taken over? 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
2340 For you, Madame. Divorce ala mantis. 1.2222 0.05423 90 74 12 4
2341 Who says if you have sex on the 1st date, you don’t get a 2nd? 1.2222 0.04981 108 89 14 5
2342 Just what you ordered, Miss Salome. 1.2222 0.05672 72 58 12 2
2343 It’s our post-coital special… 1.2222 0.06007 72 59 10 3
2344 Ohhh, he looks gorgeous. 1.2222 0.05556 81 66 12 3
2345 The fool! I told him to take me to dinner first and he did it! 1.2222 0.06086 81 68 8 5
2346 The Honeymoon Special for madame. 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
2347 As per nature’s pre-nuptial contract, Madam, tonight’s special: ‘Hey, hey, hey, you took your chances!’’ 1.2222 0.05423 90 74 12 4
2348 In this case, revenge is a dish best served warm.” 1.2222 0.05087 99 81 14 4
2349 The chef was pleased with your excellent choice. 1.2222 0.05316 72 57 14 1
2350 that is not my husbands head 1.2222 0.05188 90 73 14 3
2351 Tables for two in The New Yorker gave it a rave review! 1.2222 0.04969 81 64 16 1
2352 I recommend a full-bodied wine 1.2222 0.06086 81 68 8 5
2353 Your date just as you ordered. 1.2222 0.06324 72 60 8 4
2354 Hubbie, never looked so good. 1.2222 0.05270 81 65 14 2
2355 Here’s your super fresh meal. Was just cooked shortly before you got here! 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
2356 As ordered, lightly steamed. 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
2357 Sir,in the future it is not necessary to make a reservation for two if you will be eating a family member. 1.2222 0.05556 81 66 12 3
2358 My husband has finally proved useful 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
2359 Ahh, on time at last! 1.2222 0.05423 90 74 12 4
2360 I’ve only ever had one …prepared that way. 1.2222 0.05827 81 67 10 4
2361 With Mr. Serling’s Compliments. 1.2222 0.05556 81 66 12 3
2362 As requested, your ex-husbands head served on a platter. 1.2222 0.04969 81 64 16 1
2363 Tlhe baby will be beautiful. 1.2222 0.04665 99 79 18 2
2364 His head came out extremely tender this time. Your children should be proud. 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
2365 And since you’re eating alone, no doubt you realize this was locally sourced. 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
2366 I won’t be needing a box. 1.2222 0.05556 81 66 12 3
2367 What?!I said Tender not Tinder.. 1.2222 0.05270 81 65 14 2
2368 Let’s hope this is more satisfying 1.2222 0.05270 81 65 14 2
2369 “It took our chef a while to remove the smile, Madame. Enjoy!” 1.2222 0.04941 90 72 16 2
2370 Monsieur, Voici votre repas cannibalistique…bon appetit… 1.2222 0.05556 81 66 12 3
2371 Dearest Arnold, I will always remember our wedding feast. 1.2222 0.05188 90 73 14 3
2372 Hmmm I’ve never had one prepared like this. Do you have any dipping sauce? 1.2222 0.06007 72 59 10 3
2373 From the south side of the garden, before the rains. 1.2212 0.05105 104 86 13 5
2374 my cousin was such a hothead 1.2212 0.04918 104 85 15 4
2375 Enjoy your Mate’s Head. 1.2211 0.05223 95 78 13 4
2376 Our Fresh, French Guillotine Yard Special! 1.2211 0.04534 95 75 19 1
2377 He picked up the tab 1.2211 0.05004 95 77 15 3
2378 Tastes just like a mosquito. 1.2211 0.04775 95 76 17 2
2379 You Eat What You Are 1.2211 0.05223 95 78 13 4
2380 I demand to see the chef! There’s been a mistake! That’s not my husband. That’s somebody else. 1.2211 0.05433 95 79 11 5
2381 Wait! I didn’t order him, I ordered my mother-in-law! 1.2211 0.05004 95 77 15 3
2382 Mantee always did have a flair for the dramatic entrance. 1.2211 0.04534 95 75 19 1
2383 Happy wife,happy life. 1.2211 0.05433 95 79 11 5
2384 Roasted Boyfriend’s Head a l’orange. 1.2211 0.05223 95 78 13 4
2385 Compliments from the gentleman on the plate.” 1.2211 0.05223 95 78 13 4
2386 I know you are what you eat, but this is ridiculous. 1.2211 0.04775 95 76 17 2
2387 Et Voila, Madame… one Honeymoon Special! 1.2209 0.04794 86 68 17 1
2388 For once, I’m the one who gets some head! 1.2209 0.05825 86 72 9 5
2389 Your daily “his head on a platter” special for
Your Highness
1.2209 0.04794 86 68 17 1
2390 OH, Darling, you look just yummy. 1.2209 0.05335 86 70 13 3
2391 The chef hopes it’s to your li-kin’. 1.2209 0.05585 86 71 11 4
2392 The whole thing left me largely unsatisfied I’m afraid. Send it back. 1.2209 0.05072 86 69 15 2
2393 I already had two of those for breakfast 1.2209 0.05072 86 69 15 2
2394 And it is of corse gluten-free, for the discerning cannibal. 1.2209 0.05335 86 70 13 3
2395 As you requested madam: cannibal bourguignon au vin. 1.2209 0.05072 86 69 15 2
2396 He begged me to show you his good side. 1.2209 0.05335 86 70 13 3
2397 Gives a new meaning to tête-à-tête, doesn’t it Madame. 1.2209 0.05585 86 71 11 4
2398 Just as you specified, Sir, on a silver platter. Would you like a side of revenge? 1.2208 0.05735 77 63 11 3
2399 His mistress sends her regards. 1.2208 0.05104 77 61 15 1
2400 This happens every time I mate. 1.2208 0.05429 77 62 13 2
2401 Your husband, Madam. Your prayers have been answered. 1.2208 0.05104 77 61 15 1
2402 Wanda was always a sucker for bedroom eyes au jus. 1.2208 0.05429 77 62 13 2
2403 La ‘tête de consort’, Madame 1.2208 0.05104 77 61 15 1
2404 I’m sorry darling, I can’t with Frank tonight. He always ate too much garlic. Could you give me mate #4, Andrei, please? 1.2208 0.06303 77 65 7 5
2405 I know that revenge is best served cold, but tonight I’ll make an exception. 1.2208 0.05735 77 63 11 3
2406 We’ll always have Paris. 1.2206 0.05869 68 55 11 2
2407 It’s so great to dine out maskless, I’ve lost my head. 1.2206 0.05869 68 55 11 2
2408 Your party, Madam. Shall I box the remains? 1.2206 0.06231 68 56 9 3
2409 This cartoon is in need of a serious wake up call.” 1.2206 0.06574 68 57 7 4
2410 I think you’re getting a head of yourself. 1.2200 0.05427 100 84 10 6
2411 No, it’s not my ex, but thanks for asking. 1.2200 0.05238 100 83 12 5
2412 He’s ready for round 2 already? 1.2198 0.04893 91 73 16 2
2413 Some clients fail to comprehend the value of a respectful gratuity. 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
2414 We pray you find it to your satisfaction.” 1.2198 0.04365 91 71 20 0
2415 Your Ex, Madam 1.2198 0.04893 91 73 16 2
2416 Think if it as doing your part to decrease the surplus population. 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
2417 I shouldn’t have said I didn’t like him… 1.2198 0.04893 91 73 16 2
2418 May I present, piece de resistance,
Plate a la Mate.
1.2198 0.04893 91 73 16 2
2419 Bachelor #12 was over-anxious and got ahead of himself. 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
2420 I hope you love it. 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
2421 Can you bring some hot sauce, please”? 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
2422 Dinner and a movie, a date and then dinner again, I see…. 1.2198 0.05136 91 74 14 3
2423 Would you like his legs and body as a side? 1.2198 0.04893 91 73 16 2
2424 May I present Monsieur for Madam 1.2198 0.04893 91 73 16 2
2425 He turned into a real hot head when he realized life wasn’t a picnic. 1.2198 0.05369 91 75 12 4
2426 Your mate-to-table entrée, madame. 1.2195 0.05494 82 67 12 3
2427 Your husband said to start without him. 1.2195 0.05494 82 67 12 3
2428 In addition to our bill, there’ll be a two hundred dollar fine! 1.2195 0.05213 82 66 14 2
2429 Et voila, Madam Salome. The head of John the Mantis. 1.2195 0.05494 82 67 12 3
2430 This is from the gentleman at the end of the bar 1.2195 0.06262 82 70 6 6
2431 Would madam also like to see the after-dinner mates? 1.2195 0.05762 82 68 10 4
2432 You wished for your ex’s head on a platter and here it is. Enjoy. 1.2195 0.04916 82 65 16 1
2433 Have you met Mr. Jones? 1.2195 0.05494 82 67 12 3
2434 May I offer you a side of pickles and ice cream?? 1.2195 0.05213 82 66 14 2
2435 Just a hint of orange oil. 1.2195 0.05213 82 66 14 2
2436 And for you final course, bachelor number 3… 1.2195 0.05762 82 68 10 4
2437 Hot and steamy! Just how I like it! 1.2195 0.05762 82 68 10 4
2438 May he be more satisfying, now. 1.2195 0.05213 82 66 14 2
2439 We’re happy to serve you. 1.2195 0.05494 82 67 12 3
2440 Revenge is sweet – and savory. 1.2195 0.05494 82 67 12 3
2441 Head’s up, M’lady, I pray this is to your satisfaction. 1.2195 0.04916 82 65 16 1
2442 Do you want fries with this? 1.2195 0.05213 82 66 14 2
2443 Will my husband be joining me? Funny story. 1.2195 0.05494 82 67 12 3
2444 Can I get fries with that? 1.2192 0.05932 73 60 10 3
2445 Ah! The best part of being pregnant. 1.2192 0.05251 73 58 14 1
2446 He was a good lover. 1.2192 0.05251 73 58 14 1
2447 May I suggest,Madam,that you take your time. Don’t get ahead of yourself. 1.2192 0.06244 73 61 8 4
2448 My ex-husband’s head on a platter? Looks like my prayers have been answered! 1.2192 0.05602 73 59 12 2
2449 Looks familiar. I won’t be needing the knife and fork. 1.2192 0.05602 73 59 12 2
2450 Thought you might not be done with him yet. 1.2192 0.05932 73 60 10 3
2451 wow I just swiped left 1.2192 0.05251 73 58 14 1
2452 Your husband has joined you as dinner,Madam! 1.2192 0.05932 73 60 10 3
2453 Your donor is served madame. 1.2192 0.05932 73 60 10 3
2454 I trust the pre-meal sex was satisfactory? 1.2188 0.04492 96 76 19 1
2455 Monsieur, por vous, la hedda hopper. 1.2188 0.04957 96 78 15 3
2456 I did not say head, I said Head Cheese ! 1.2188 0.04957 96 78 15 3
2457 Oh my God yes, yes, a thousand times yes! 1.2188 0.05173 96 79 13 4
2458 I’ll pass. I was praying for the thorax. 1.2188 0.05173 96 79 13 4
2459 We were married two great years. 1.2188 0.06481 64 53 8 3
2460 The Salome Special Madame. 1.2188 0.04957 96 78 15 3
2461 Look what all the praying got you! 1.2188 0.04957 96 78 15 3
2462 Your date is ready for you, ma’am. 1.2188 0.04957 96 78 15 3
2463 Though I have seen my head (grown slightly ‘sprawled’) brought in upon a platter…”
-The Love Song of J. Alfred Grasshop
1.2188 0.05173 96 79 13 4
2464 Would you like a head start on your appetizer? 1.2188 0.05665 64 51 12 1
2465 His last words were ‘ Totally worth it’ Madam. 1.2188 0.05173 96 79 13 4
2466 May I offer you this appetizer while you wait for your children to arrive? 1.2188 0.05173 96 79 13 4
2467 Walter? 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
2468 It’s our ‘Widow’s Special’, a house favorite. 1.2184 0.05991 87 74 7 6
2469 Larry?! 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
2470 The post-coital male mantis is especially delectable this evening,Sir. 1.2184 0.05279 87 71 13 3
2471 As requested Madam,your lovers head. 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
2472 He broiled much better than your first four 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
2473 Anything to reduce my carbon footprint. 1.2184 0.05763 87 73 9 5
2474 I don’t mind, he was my ex anyway. 1.2184 0.04746 87 69 17 1
2475 As requested Sir, a family recipe. 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
2476 That came sooner than expected! 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
2477 I misunderstood tête-à-tête 1.2184 0.05019 87 70 15 2
2478 Madam, here is your dinner as you requested. By the way, there are some officers here from the Vice Squad who would like to have a word with you. 1.2184 0.05526 87 72 11 4
2479 … complaints of the chef. 1.2184 0.05019 87 70 15 2
2480 Ah, just the way I like them. 1.2182 0.04725 110 90 16 4
2481 Voila! Congratulations on consummating your relationship. Here’s your mate. 1.2179 0.05046 78 62 15 1
2482 Compliments of the gentleman at the end of the bar. 1.2179 0.05668 78 64 11 3
2483 Farm raised or wild? 1.2179 0.06228 78 66 7 5
2484 Your husband, Madam. The rest of the carcass is in a courtesy bag. 1.2179 0.05366 78 63 13 2
2485 I believe you know this dish very well, sir. 1.2179 0.05668 78 64 11 3
2486 I can see myself eating that. 1.2179 0.05366 78 63 13 2
2487 Your postcoital meal ma’am, prepared as you like. 1.2179 0.05668 78 64 11 3
2488 I wondered why my date has not returned from the restroom. 1.2179 0.05366 78 63 13 2
2489 Consummatehead 1.2179 0.05366 78 63 13 2
2490 Tete d’homme, rare! 1.2179 0.05366 78 63 13 2
2491 Post coital paying mantis, madame. 1.2174 0.04845 92 74 16 2
2492 Your husband, Madame…just as you like him! 1.2174 0.05792 69 56 11 2
2493 I still prefer my men al dente 1.2174 0.05411 69 55 13 1
2494 Please. Prayer first… 1.2174 0.05086 92 75 14 3
2495 Can you remove the feelers – they always freak me out” 1.2174 0.05792 69 56 11 2
2496 Your date, ma’am. But the check will still be for two. 1.2174 0.05086 92 75 14 3
2497 My cousin Larry,never smelled so good. 1.2174 0.06486 69 58 7 4
2498 it’s been a pleasure serving You 1.2174 0.04845 92 74 16 2
2499 Let’s see who is this… 1.2174 0.04845 92 74 16 2
2500 Its so much easier for a praying mantis to come here and just skip the whole mating thing. Now, what do you have for a full bodied red?” 1.2174 0.05315 92 76 12 4
2501 Ah, yes, he always was a good provider. 1.2174 0.05792 69 56 11 2
2502 From the gentleman at the other table. 1.2174 0.05535 92 77 10 5
2503 Bon appétit! Zat enticement from ze neighboring table. 1.2174 0.06149 69 57 9 3
2504 Dinner, Madame, a la John Baptist 1.2169 0.05698 83 69 10 4
2505 Congratulations, Madam. Another successful date. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2506 Fresh? The chef bit it off herself this morning. 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2507 Would you say it pairs well with a chardonnay? 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2508 and here’s your mantis in flagrante sauce. 1.2169 0.05698 83 69 10 4
2509 Waiter! I said I would be dining WITH my mate. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2510 Your Husband on a side of wild greens.
Boun appetito!
1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2511 Your husband ordered ahead… 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2512 I don’t know what I was thinking. Usually I only go to fancy restaurants for things I can’t get at home. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2513 I asked for it well done. 1.2169 0.05434 83 68 12 3
2514 They say we’re an excellent source of protein. 1.2169 0.05156 83 67 14 2
2515 As you ordered, Friends with Benefits Almondine. 1.2169 0.04863 83 66 16 1
2516 And would you like a cigarette with that? 1.2169 0.05698 83 69 10 4
2517 i prey thats not real 1.2169 0.05698 83 69 10 4
2518 Your date has arrived madam 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2519 désert chaud 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2520 As requested madame, your husband, sautéed 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2521 Your mate, Madam. Will you be saying grace? 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2522 I think I’ve just decided to go vegan. 1.2165 0.05124 97 80 13 4
2523 Fresh from the marriage stick, madame 1.2165 0.05528 97 82 9 6
2524 Too bad you have to put out to get dinner. 1.2165 0.04910 97 79 15 3
2525 Your tête-à-tête, Miss Mantis. 1.2165 0.04687 97 78 17 2
2526 No means NO, Roy! 1.2165 0.05330 97 81 11 5
2527 Might I suggest for dessert, some head cheese? 1.2162 0.06166 74 62 8 4
2528 I don’t eat relatives 1.2162 0.06166 74 62 8 4
2529 oh, well, just another protein- 1.2162 0.05188 74 59 14 1
2530 That’s exactly what I’ve been preying for. 1.2162 0.05188 74 59 14 1
2531 Your third husband, as requested. 1.2162 0.05533 74 60 12 2
2532 Our chef’s special presentation of your husband’s head, madam. And may I offer our congratulations on your pregnancy? 1.2162 0.06166 74 62 8 4
2533 Yes, Ma’am. He’s the answer to your prayers. 1.2162 0.05533 74 60 12 2
2534 Our special tonight: Tête-à-tête. 1.2162 0.05188 74 59 14 1
2535 Oh Lord, give us this day our daily head. 1.2162 0.05533 74 60 12 2
2536 Is that Tom or Harry? 1.2162 0.06166 74 62 8 4
2537 I never did like my kids! 1.2162 0.05533 74 60 12 2
2538 Tonight’s special: Head of Mate on a Plate 1.2162 0.05188 74 59 14 1
2539 Just as handsome as the day we met. 1.2162 0.04818 74 58 16 0
2540 Per your request, the legs and wings will be placed in a doggie bag. 1.2162 0.05858 74 61 10 3
2541 Head over heels, just as you ordered it. 1.2159 0.04411 88 69 19 0
2542 This is highly recommended .
‘John the Baptist’ Rating: 97+!
1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
2543 You know how they say, keep your friends close and your enemies closer!
Well you can’t keep them any closer then this!
1.2159 0.05469 88 73 11 4
2544 A bit forward for a first date don’t you think? 1.2159 0.05225 88 72 13 3
2545 We cooked him “a point” just as you requested, Madam. 1.2159 0.04698 88 70 17 1
2546 Madame,here is the head of your family with scalloped potatoes on the side. 1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
2547 mmmm, sooo gooood to see you again, my dear 1.2159 0.05469 88 73 11 4
2548 I want a divorce! I’ve decided to quit while I’m a head. 1.2159 0.05225 88 72 13 3
2549 And just like that, Stephen King discovers the ending for Secret Window. 1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
2550 What did he expect? He suffered from ED! 1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
2551 It’s the table-for-one special. 1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
2552 We pray this meets your approval. 1.2159 0.05469 88 73 11 4
2553 Too bad he didn’t pay more attention in sex ed. 1.2159 0.05703 88 74 9 5
2554 Yes, it’s well done, as usual. 1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
2555 Your plat de résistance, madame. 1.2159 0.05469 88 73 11 4
2556 Compliments of the chef: a grass-finished, sustainably-harvested capsule with a post-coital reduction. 1.2159 0.04968 88 71 15 2
2557 Your dinner date. 1.2157 0.04951 102 84 14 4
2558 But waiter, doesn’t this main course come with sides? 1.2157 0.04542 102 82 18 2
2559 Wednesday’s Leftover Special 1.2157 0.04751 102 83 16 3
2560 Your Ladies’ Luncheon Diet Special. 1.2157 0.04751 102 83 16 3
2561 Waiter, that does not look like lettuce to me 1.2154 0.06002 65 53 10 2
2562 Third dates are the best. 1.2154 0.06390 65 54 8 3
2563 Ms. Mantis, Hope we got your order correctly the time! 1.2154 0.05587 65 52 12 1
2564 Voila. And, will the gentleman be rejoining you? 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2565 Revenge is usually best served cold, but the chef hopes you like his twist on this classic.” 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2566 Your date asked that I present them in a fancy manner. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2567 Something special for the mother-to-be. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2568 Here’s your post intercourse delicacy madame. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2569 I believe you’ll find it delicious, relatively speaking. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2570 Tete de mari, rare, Madame. Just as you ordered. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2571 Breakfast after the wedding night. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2572 I said I’d like head cheese, not a head, please! 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2573 I’ll have what she’s having. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2574 It would appear your husband will be joining you. 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2575 Ahh, mate on a plate! 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2576 Head o’Mate,Madame? 1.2152 0.04990 79 63 15 1
2577 Revenge, served cold. 1.2152 0.05305 79 64 13 2
2578 Took you long enough but – finally – my ex’s head on a plate. 1.2152 0.04653 79 62 17 0
2579 I guess I’m a carnivore. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2580 While I am unaccustomed to eating one of my own,the presentation is lovely. 1.2152 0.05603 79 65 11 3
2581 You got the last one. Well, second last. 1.2152 0.05885 79 66 9 4
2582 And for Madam, the Mantis Tete sans Corps. Again…… 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2583 I’m sorry, I’m so stuffed I just can’t look at desert. 1.2151 0.05036 93 76 14 3
2584 It’s delectable, and doesn’t cost an arm and a leg. 1.2151 0.05263 93 77 12 4
2585 If I may, your taste in men is superb 1.2151 0.04798 93 75 16 2
2586 We thought we’d save you some time.. 1.2150 0.05148 107 90 11 6
2587 Your late husband, Ma’am. 1.2143 0.05717 70 57 11 2
2588 NO!!! I said, “bring me the head of Alfredo Garcia!” 1.2143 0.05375 84 69 12 3
2589 We haven’t said grace yet. 1.2143 0.06068 70 58 9 3
2590 Thank you for waiting for your date to arrive. 1.2143 0.05101 84 68 14 2
2591 I can not eat my own self! 1.2143 0.05101 84 68 14 2
2592 You’ve mixed up my order! —that is NOT the gentlemantis I came in with! 1.2143 0.06068 70 58 9 3
2593 I knew my husband. He enjoyed it. 1.2143 0.05375 84 69 12 3
2594 Oh my. Jim? 1.2143 0.05717 70 57 11 2
2595 Le Ménopause 1.2143 0.05342 70 56 13 1
2596 Eating well without having to have sex first – it’s a perfect life! 1.2143 0.05077 98 81 13 4
2597 At least this way I can avoid conversation AND a doggy bag. 1.2143 0.05636 84 70 10 4
2598 Also, the chef sends his congratulations on the occasion of the happy news. 1.2143 0.05101 84 68 14 2
2599 My first love! 1.2143 0.06068 70 58 9 3
2600 I am pleased to serve your former mate.
Lightly steamed with a lemon-caper sauce.
1.2143 0.04812 84 67 16 1
2601 Your date called to say eat a head without her. 1.2143 0.05636 84 70 10 4
2602 Oooh, my ex-husband! Perfect 1.2143 0.05375 84 69 12 3
2603 “Madam, we have prepared a delightful meal that I believe is an answer to your prayer.” 1.2143 0.05101 84 68 14 2
2604 All of our desserts are a head above the rest. 1.2143 0.05101 84 68 14 2
2605 Tonight’s special, from our ‘head’ chef. 1.2143 0.05101 84 68 14 2
2606 He looks tastier than last night. 1.2143 0.04865 98 80 15 3
2607 Prey tell, is that Joe? 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2608 Your husband, as ordered! 1.2136 0.04709 103 84 16 3
2609 This way, Madame, you can skip the whole dating ordeal. 1.2136 0.04503 103 83 18 2
2610 I hope the sex was worth it ma’am 1.2136 0.05098 103 86 12 5
2611 Here you are. There’s nothing like a post-coital snack is there? 1.2135 0.04918 89 72 15 2
2612 His last words were, “At least I didn’t die a virgin.” 1.2135 0.05171 89 73 13 3
2613 Sir, your hot date. 1.2135 0.04918 89 72 15 2
2614 Compliments of your husband, who wishes you a happy anniversary–and bon appétit! 1.2135 0.04651 89 71 17 1
2615 Here is your M’iseur, with root vegetables and roasted potatoes. 1.2135 0.05412 89 74 11 4
2616 He looks so delicious and peaceful. 1.2135 0.04651 89 71 17 1
2617 Madame, zee boyfriend du jour. 1.2135 0.05643 89 75 9 5
2618 The chef’s specialty, madam. Revenge, served cold. 1.2135 0.04918 89 72 15 2
2619 I hope the meal is better than the sex. 1.2135 0.05171 89 73 13 3
2620 Plus ça change, plus que c’est la même chose. 1.2135 0.05171 89 73 13 3
2621 Thank you for ordering ahead 1.2135 0.05412 89 74 11 4
2622 Mating season left her with a heady feeling. 1.2135 0.05171 89 73 13 3
2623 It appears your date has ghosted you. 1.2133 0.05787 75 62 10 3
2624 We had a complicated relationship. 1.2133 0.05127 75 60 14 1
2625 He already paid the bill Madam. 1.2133 0.05787 75 62 10 3
2626 dinner for one sir 1.2133 0.06090 75 63 8 4
2627 I don’t know how I’ll fit him in, HIS eyes are bigger than MY stomach! 1.2133 0.05127 75 60 14 1
2628 He had the poor taste to consider himself the head of the family. 1.2133 0.05467 75 61 12 2
2629 I usually eat them raw. 1.2133 0.05787 75 62 10 3
2630 Yes, it’s locally sourced…why do you ask? 1.2133 0.04762 75 59 16 0
2631 We pride ourselves on being a welcoming spot for family dining. 1.2133 0.05127 75 60 14 1
2632 As in years past Madame’s late husband’s remaining remains have already been doggy bagged for your take-home convenience. 1.2131 0.05780 61 49 11 1
2633 The gentlemantis said this is his last attempt to win your love. Then he disappeared. 1.2130 0.04931 108 90 13 5
2634 I think that’s the wrong order my ex husband was way smaller than that. 1.2130 0.04931 108 90 13 5
2635 He’s all yours. 1.2128 0.04752 94 76 16 2
2636 Yum,the one that got away! 1.2128 0.04244 94 74 20 0
2637 Don’t worry about it, he’s the special. 1.2128 0.04987 94 77 14 3
2638 Since we are the cosmic joke in the universe, we kill our own..at least we can recycle. 1.2128 0.04752 94 76 16 2
2639 And mantis for the ladytis 1.2128 0.05634 94 80 8 6
2640 Smells…interesting. 1.2128 0.04752 94 76 16 2
2641 This is better than sex. 1.2128 0.04987 94 77 14 3
2642 This evening’s date. 1.2128 0.04987 94 77 14 3
2643 He decided to cut to the chase. 1.2128 0.04987 94 77 14 3
2644 It has a flavorful body, but you knew that. 1.2128 0.04244 94 74 20 0
2645 You’re husband won’t be joining you for dinner 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2646 This looks positively wonderful, what happened before, not so much. 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
2647 You and your ex finally see eye-to-eye, but unfortunately your relationship has hit a dead end. 1.2125 0.05817 80 67 9 4
2648 What I said was: “I wanted his head not to CHATTER, although his head on a PLATTER seems to have solved THAT, too!” 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
2649 I told him that #Me too was a real thing. 1.2125 0.04602 80 63 17 0
2650 Head cheese for your tête à tête. 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
2651 As you requested, the appetizer portion 1.2125 0.05817 80 67 9 4
2652 Voila, your latest mating victim. Bon appetit! 1.2125 0.05817 80 67 9 4
2653 We are out of grass. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2654 Your other half will arrive shortly 1.2125 0.04934 80 64 15 1
2655 I’ve heard it tastes like chicken. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2656 Today’s special, the chef’s surprise. 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2657 As ordered – your mother-in-law’s head on a silver platter, Sir. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2658 With the head chef’s compliments, madam! 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2659 The mating season special 1.2125 0.04602 80 63 17 0
2660 How delicious! My husband! 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2661 And then he said, ‘You didn’t have to bite my head off.” 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2662 Shall I remove the exoskeleton? 1.2125 0.05817 80 67 9 4
2663 I ordered ahead. 1.2125 0.05817 80 67 9 4
2664 The struggles of being an Australian Mantis: “I’d like to eat, mate” 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2665 Head of husband ala delight! 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2666 It is the speciality of our head chef. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2667 Will you be installing tinder again, miss? 1.2125 0.05539 80 66 11 3
2668 Just giving you a heads up!! 1.2125 0.05817 80 67 9 4
2669 Two heads can be better than one, if you don’t eat it. 1.2125 0.05245 80 65 13 2
2670 You too, dear. 1.2121 0.05424 99 84 9 6
2671 It’s our last one, so it’s good you ordered ahead. 1.2121 0.04821 99 81 15 3
2672 May I suggest the Chardonnay with your husband 1.2121 0.05071 66 52 14 0
2673 May I present your husband? 1.2119 0.04315 118 96 19 3
2674 I can’t believe he remembered our anniversary! 1.2118 0.05820 85 72 8 5
2675 Just as you instructed…when you brought him in. 1.2118 0.04762 85 68 16 1
2676 His claim that you were ‘talking his head off’ fortuitously provides Madame with a complimentary dessert. 1.2118 0.05317 85 70 12 3
2677 Your husband,madam. Steamed,not stirred. 1.2118 0.05575 85 71 10 4
2678 I had that last night! 1.2118 0.05047 85 69 14 2
2679 Madam, your head du jour. 1.2118 0.05047 85 69 14 2
2680 And how will you be preying for this? 1.2118 0.04762 85 68 16 1
2681 The Chef sends his regards 1.2118 0.05047 85 69 14 2
2682 I’m afraid there’s a hair on my head! 1.2118 0.05317 85 70 12 3
2683 Your blind date has arrived. 1.2118 0.04762 85 68 16 1
2684 And now, you get ahead. 1.2118 0.05317 85 70 12 3
2685 I guess it’s true. The way to a man’s heart IS through his stomach. 1.2118 0.05317 85 70 12 3
2686 Will madam be taking the rest to go? 1.2118 0.04762 85 68 16 1
2687 You are what you eat, after all! 1.2115 0.04668 104 85 16 3
2688 Par for the course, m’mam. 1.2115 0.04464 104 84 18 2
2689 Seriously? If I eat that thing, I’m going to barf. 1.2113 0.05990 71 59 9 3
2690 Lovely. He reminds me of my first husband. Also, my second, third, fourth, fifth and sixth. 1.2113 0.05644 71 58 11 2
2691 Is there really anything better than consummating another relationship with a fine Mantishevitz? 1.2113 0.05644 71 58 11 2
2692 He won’t be ordering for you again, madam. 1.2113 0.05275 71 57 13 1
2693 Excuse me,
I did request that my late husband to be cooked medium rare
1.2113 0.05990 71 59 9 3
2694 Medium-rare, as requested. 1.2113 0.05275 71 57 13 1
2695 As promised, Madame, no unsightly mandible marks! 1.2113 0.05275 71 57 13 1
2696 I assume your husband won’t be joining you. 1.2111 0.04869 90 73 15 2
2697 No thanks. I had that for lunch. 1.2111 0.04869 90 73 15 2
2698 We call this dish, I(ntro)scect(ion) 1.2111 0.05585 90 76 9 5
2699 That looks good for the main course. I just loved the appetizer! 1.2111 0.04605 90 72 17 1
2700 Roasted ex-lover, bon appétit. 1.2111 0.05119 90 74 13 3
2701 Voilà. Your ex. 1.2111 0.04869 90 73 15 2
2702 No thank you. I’m not interested in your two-for-one special. 1.2111 0.05357 90 75 11 4
2703 I said I wanted to have Fred OVER for dinner! 1.2110 0.04337 109 88 19 2
2704 Mama always said: “First date, thrill ‘em; second date, grill ‘em.” 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2705 Is this your idea of a joke? 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2706 We had a good time together. 1.2105 0.04463 95 76 18 1
2707 And now, for your post-coital snack … 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2708 Now why hadn’t I thought of that! 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2709 I know you really love this dish. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2710 Take it back to the kitchen please! Revenge is best served COLD! 1.2105 0.04463 95 76 18 1
2711 Did you leave room for dessert ma’am? 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2712 I’m pretty sure I didn’t ask for carrots on the side. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2713 Well he should have bought me dinner first. 1.2105 0.04940 95 78 14 3
2714 Here is your headhunter entree. 1.2105 0.06016 76 64 8 4
2715 he told me to tell you that he would be a little late 1.2105 0.04940 95 78 14 3
2716 Superb presentation. And doesn’t it always taste better when someone else fixes it? 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2717 Ah! My mate on a plate. 1.2105 0.05161 95 79 12 4
2718 Perfect. I’m eating for two hundred. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2719 Liking head has a different meaning for you folks. 1.2105 0.05161 95 79 12 4
2720 Í apologize for serving leftovers. 1.2105 0.05067 76 61 14 1
2721 Perfect amuse-bouche! I’m ovulating. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2722 Chef’s special, sir. Cooked to perfection and absolutely grotesque. 1.2105 0.05402 76 62 12 2
2723 His face had that startled expression that you find so delectable.” 1.2105 0.04708 95 77 16 2
2724 Of course, smoking is less fattening. 1.2105 0.05717 76 63 10 3
2725 Another satisfied customer. 1.2100 0.04984 100 83 13 4
2726 Can you add a tad more garlic and attitude please? 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2727 This one is a real head turner. 1.2100 0.04777 100 82 15 3
2728 We always did share the same taste. 1.2100 0.04984 100 83 13 4
2729 The Early Bird Special, madam. 1.2100 0.04560 100 81 17 2
2730 Ohhh, so that’s where my sister went! 1.2100 0.04333 100 80 19 1
2731 I’m famished. The appetizer round moved heaven and earth. 1.2099 0.05476 81 67 11 3
2732 As the head server, I think you will enjoy this delicacy. 1.2099 0.05187 81 66 13 2
2733 Please don’t tell my wife about this… Wait…? 1.2099 0.05187 81 66 13 2
2734 Our most requested dish, head on a platter. 1.2099 0.05187 81 66 13 2
2735 Last night’s lover with potatoes is our specialty 1.2099 0.05476 81 67 11 3
2736 As I told you,we have something for everyone. 1.2099 0.04553 81 64 17 0
2737 John the Mantis. 1.2099 0.05476 81 67 11 3
2738 My wife is your biggest fan. 1.2099 0.04880 81 65 15 1
2739 Mademoiselle — your Little Death Au Gratin. Bon appétit! 1.2099 0.05476 81 67 11 3
2740 If you please..the bachelorette special 1.2099 0.05476 81 67 11 3
2741 Your carne pincheada, madam. 1.2099 0.05187 81 66 13 2
2742 Prey, then eat. That’s how I was raised. 1.2099 0.04880 81 65 15 1
2743 Not original, from a cartoon I remember long ago: “Imbecile, I said bring me the head WAITER!” 1.2099 0.05476 81 67 11 3
2744 He said he was just going to the bathroom! 1.2099 0.05187 81 66 13 2
2745 I love these, they’re crunchy on the outside and chewy on the inside! 1.2097 0.06560 62 52 7 3
2746 This dish always reminds me of my mother 1.2095 0.04628 105 86 16 3
2747 It’s Salome’s specialty. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
2748 I’ll have a cigarette with that please. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
2749 Ah, yes, just the way I like it! 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
2750 Oh,yum! Looks just like my first husband. 1.2093 0.04712 86 69 16 1
2751 Do you have a Praying Mantis Bag? 1.2093 0.05515 86 72 10 4
2752 A prayer is probably appropriate. 1.2093 0.04712 86 69 16 1
2753 Voila! Your prayers have been answered. 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
2754 He had a hat 1.2093 0.05758 86 73 8 5
2755 Oh, I do hope that our children have his eyes! 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
2756 His dying request was for me to ask: Was it good for you, too? 1.2093 0.04712 86 69 16 1
2757 I hope it’s not someone you know. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
2758 The fava beans and a bottle of chianti will be out shortly 1.2093 0.05515 86 72 10 4
2759 Dinner after dessert, I see. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
2760 The thorax is being glazed, enjoy! 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
2761 We’re out of parnships. 1.2093 0.05261 86 71 12 3
2762 He was a great date, I hope he tastes as good . 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
2763 You must have worked up quite an appetite. 1.2093 0.04994 86 70 14 2
2764 Your husband’s last note offers ‘Congratulations’ on madam’s pregnancy. 1.2090 0.05438 67 54 12 1
2765 I suggest the eyes be left for dessert 1.2090 0.05839 67 55 10 2
2766 Compliments from the head chef, madam. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2767 Mom never liked her. 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2768 Did madame enjoy the date more than monsieur? 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2769 I don’t eat anything with eyes 1.2088 0.05529 91 77 9 5
2770 with compliments from the chef, who also fucked this dude 1.2088 0.04821 91 74 15 2
2771 Voila! Steamed spouse! 1.2088 0.05068 91 75 13 3
2772 La tête seulement sir. Just the way you like it 1.2088 0.04560 91 73 17 1
2773 The chef recommends that you do not criticize this one. 1.2088 0.05303 91 76 11 4
2774 We were a couple but recently separated. 1.2083 0.05573 72 59 11 2
2775 Madame, your date has arrived. 1.2083 0.04893 96 79 14 3
2776 L’Haute Couture Apres Coitus Cuisine… et voila 1.2083 0.05210 72 58 13 1
2777 Braised head of prey. The answer to your prayers. 1.2083 0.05573 72 59 11 2
2778 The new iPhone. 1.2083 0.05322 96 81 10 5
2779 I believe this is what mademoiselle Salome ordered. 1.2083 0.05573 72 59 11 2
2780 I TOLD him I’d eat him for lunch! 1.2083 0.05913 72 60 9 3
2781 That’s not who I ordered! 1.2083 0.05913 72 60 9 3
2782 And for madam… the euphemism 1.2083 0.04893 96 79 14 3
2783 Well done, madame! 1.2083 0.05210 72 58 13 1
2784 This is very fresh; we cooked him as soon as you killed him. 1.2083 0.05210 72 58 13 1
2785 Well, one less mouth to feed. 1.2083 0.06235 72 61 7 4
2786 You’ll love him. 1.2083 0.05573 72 59 11 2
2787 Oh good, I’ve been praying for my husband! 1.2083 0.06235 72 61 7 4
2788 Was it humanely raised? 1.2083 0.05210 72 58 13 1
2789 He’s still smokin’ hot. 1.2083 0.06235 72 61 7 4
2790 Crispy Baby Daddy, just as you ordered Mademoiselle 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2791 May I have a little extra butter ? 1.2079 0.05324 101 86 9 6
2792 I see I’m a head of the game! 1.2079 0.04939 101 84 13 4
2793 Catch of the day. Note the heady aroma. I daresay you’ll find it better than sex. 1.2079 0.04520 101 82 17 2
2794 Wonderful! I hate eating alone. 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2795 Have you any Grey Poupon? 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2796 Who’s the special today? Anyone I know? 1.2078 0.04654 77 61 16 0
2797 Afterglow. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2798 As I always say, “stop while your a head” 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2799 Emma? 1.2078 0.05008 77 62 14 1
2800 I told him not to go to the kitchen… 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2801 I guess it’s too late to remind him to take out the garbage. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2802 Today’s special: your ex-husband, madam. 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2803 You are what you eat! Wait, it’s cousin Freddie! 1.2078 0.05944 77 65 8 4
2804 Would you like thorax with that? 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2805 It’s much healthier than having a cigarette afterwards. 1.2078 0.05649 77 64 10 3
2806 So… how was tonight’s special? 1.2078 0.04654 77 61 16 0
2807 It’s crispy just how you liked him. 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2808 Viola, here you are but just don’t call me Salome, alright? 1.2078 0.05338 77 63 12 2
2809 I can assure you, ma’am, the convenience is well worth it. 1.2075 0.03958 106 84 22 0
2810 Well, I did say ‘Buy me dinner first.’ 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
2811 I just can’t help myself. I gotta do it. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
2812 Estha is that you? 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
2813 Finally, I don’t need to get laid to have dinner. 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
2814 I assume you have finished saying Grace, Madam. 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
2815 Is there a corkage fee? 1.2073 0.05686 82 69 9 4
2816 For our main,a family recipe. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
2817 The gentlemen at the bar sent this over with his compliments. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
2818 Blue rare as ordered Madam. No sides. 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
2819 He wanted me to pass on the message that you’re very charming and hopes you’ll call him again soon. 1.2073 0.04504 82 65 17 0
2820 They never learn! 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
2821 ‘He prayed for a quick death.’ 1.2073 0.05415 82 68 11 3
2822 Who farted? 1.2073 0.04827 82 66 15 1
2823 Sorry, I thought you’re the wife. 1.2073 0.05129 82 67 13 2
2824 I wanted it fried! 1.2069 0.05206 87 72 12 3
2825 He asked me to confess to you that his other wife ate the rest of him. 1.2069 0.04942 87 71 14 2
2826 For your appetizer may I recommend the fried aunt? 1.2069 0.05456 87 73 10 4
2827 Sorry….No….It is not actually HIS head. 1.2069 0.04942 87 71 14 2
2828 You may have preferred the appetizer. 1.2069 0.04942 87 71 14 2
2829 No, No. Not acceptable. It’s supposed to be raw and look happy. 1.2069 0.04942 87 71 14 2
2830 If you like it, we can also serve your friends and family. 1.2069 0.05696 87 74 8 5
2831 So delicious! And beats divorce. 1.2069 0.05206 87 72 12 3
2832 Your boyfriend, a la carte, ma’am. 1.2069 0.05696 87 74 8 5
2833 Green Maggie tailors marriage counseling to her own taste. 1.2069 0.04942 87 71 14 2
2834 Madam has excellent taste. 1.2069 0.04664 87 70 16 1
2835 A delicious lover 1.2069 0.04942 87 71 14 2
2836 It looks like your dinner guest made it to the table after all. 1.2069 0.05206 87 72 12 3
2837 Nutrition for his children, madams 1.2069 0.05456 87 73 10 4
2838 Madame, your husband is joining you tonight 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2839 Your husband,Madam,medium rare. 1.2065 0.05250 92 77 11 4
2840 I presume your husband will not be dining with you this evening, Madam 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2841 Last chance to be good ! 1.2065 0.04773 92 75 15 2
2842 Tonight’s special includes a grin-in cut. 1.2065 0.05017 92 76 13 3
2843 And may I add my congratulations on your successful copulation ? 1.2062 0.05271 97 82 10 5
2844 I hope he’s just as filling this way. 1.2062 0.04620 97 79 16 2
2845 As ordered: your Ex, medium-rare, with the vegetable-of-the-day. 1.2062 0.04381 97 78 18 1
2846 It’s a dog eats dog world. 1.2062 0.05064 97 81 12 4
2847 Prey tell. .. What do we have here? 1.2059 0.06478 68 58 6 4
2848 Madame. The fork on your right is to pick his brain. 1.2059 0.05760 68 56 10 2
2849 She’ll never be able to tell me to keep my feet off the table again! 1.2059 0.05760 68 56 10 2
2850 The Tete álà Kafka, sir 1.2059 0.05089 102 86 11 5
2851 Your husband got here just in time for desert. 1.2059 0.04480 102 83 17 2
2852 I believe you swiped right on the menu, madam? 1.2059 0.04894 102 85 13 4
2853 Your husband has invited you to enjoy some leftovers. 1.2056 0.04550 107 88 16 3
2854 Your husband, medium well. 1.2055 0.05146 73 59 13 1
2855 Your mate last night 1.2055 0.05839 73 61 9 3
2856 As you said, Madam, he always loved this restaurant. 1.2055 0.05503 73 60 11 2
2857 Alas poor Yorick, I knew him…if you get my drift. 1.2055 0.05839 73 61 9 3
2858 THATs not a silver platter! 1.2055 0.05146 73 59 13 1
2859 Shall we say a prayer. 1.2055 0.05839 73 61 9 3
2860 We assume you’ll be dining alone, so our condolences and bon appetit. 1.2055 0.05839 73 61 9 3
2861 The chef recommends a Chardonnay to go with your husband’s head. 1.2055 0.05839 73 61 9 3
2862 I’m sure madam will find monsieur mantis perfect with the white wine. 1.2055 0.05503 73 60 11 2
2863 COVID’s been a blessing. 1.2055 0.05146 73 59 13 1
2864 AS always Ma’am, the traditional Father’s Day first course, his head.” 1.2055 0.05839 73 61 9 3
2865 Jiminy Cricket! 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
2866 Your Tinder date just arrived, Madam. 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
2867 Would madam care for a bib? 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
2868 We must adapt now that smoking is prohibited indoors. 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
2869 It tastes so good you’ll be beside yourself with pleasure. 1.2051 0.04950 78 63 14 1
2870 May I recommend a bold Cabernet to go with your mate du jour? 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
2871 Dining alone this evening I see. 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
2872 If the Board of Health is OK with it, then so am I! 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
2873 He said to me,
“Let’s make love then go to dinner…OK.
1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
2874 Lovely! And could you please bring me another grasshopper? 1.2051 0.04950 78 63 14 1
2875 Yes, yours. 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
2876 It was love at first sight. I told Arnold he was so cute I could eat him up. 1.2051 0.05873 78 66 8 4
2877 Yes, the antennae are crisp. 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
2878 Excellent, I was praying my ex would be on the menu. 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
2879 I was happy with the way things were, but he really wanted children. 1.2051 0.05276 78 64 12 2
2880 We also offer a head of lettuce this evening” 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
2881 I’m sorry, but I ordered him fried, not sautéed. 1.2051 0.05583 78 65 10 3
2882 The head chef prepared this especially for you. 1.2048 0.04775 83 67 15 1
2883 Your late husband wished he could be here 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
2884 Ah, fava beans….and I’m sure to have that nice Chianti. 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
2885 ‘Voila, tete de femme au four’ 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
2886 I’m expecting Mr. Kafka any moment! 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
2887 Ah madame, le tete des votre homme! 1.2048 0.05623 83 70 9 4
2888 It certainly looks yummy, but that’s not my husband. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
2889 Ah, good up to the last bite 1.2048 0.04457 83 66 17 0
2890 I see your husband is the head of the table tonight. 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
2891 Oh my God! I that head belonged to my ex-husband! 1.2048 0.04775 83 67 15 1
2892 Tête masculine bourguignon à la demande de madame. Jouir! 1.2048 0.04457 83 66 17 0
2893 Tonight we are serving the tonal center. 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
2894 Mate a la Orange, madam. 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
2895 Even at the end,Milton always gave great head. 1.2048 0.04775 83 67 15 1
2896 Your mate tartare, madam. 1.2048 0.05623 83 70 9 4
2897 Our head chef was thinking of you when he prepared this dish. 1.2048 0.04775 83 67 15 1
2898 Wrong table- that’s not Elmer. 1.2048 0.05623 83 70 9 4
2899 Lovely. Chopsticks please. 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
2900 Can you just serve dinner without the judgey looks? 1.2048 0.05355 83 69 11 3
2901 Your beheaded beloved. 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
2902 Oh,marvelous! It’s my husband! 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
2903 Served with sautéed vegetables and a rich heady sauce. Bon appetite. 1.2048 0.05073 83 68 13 2
2904 Will Madame have greens with your “tete de l’amour?” 1.2048 0.04457 83 66 17 0
2905 Your selection tonight: middle-aged male, smokin’ hot. 1.2048 0.04775 83 67 15 1
2906 Leave the utensils. Bring a bib. 1.2048 0.05623 83 70 9 4
2907 At that moment, he knew he made a mistake. 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
2908 Unfortunately, we’re no longer allowed to prepare it tableside. 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
2909 Doctor, I am the Great Clown Pagliacci 1.2045 0.05399 88 74 10 4
2910 It’s from the other female sitting over at table 2, and she asked me to say, “I told you so.” 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
2911 Serves him right. 1.2045 0.05399 88 74 10 4
2912 Today’s fresh post-coital catch. 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
2913 Voilà, the “Honeymoon Special” 1.2045 0.04891 88 72 14 2
2914 He looks familiar but delicious. Bernaise sauce s’il vous plait. 1.2045 0.04891 88 72 14 2
2915 Our honeymoon special. Enjoy. 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
2916 I told you I had a date! 1.2045 0.04891 88 72 14 2
2917 Oh! So that’s where he is. 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
2918 It’s supposed to come with a little hat. 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
2919 To Madam’s delight. Basted and broiled with no insecticides. 1.2045 0.05152 88 73 12 3
2920 He never had a prayer. 1.2045 0.05399 88 74 10 4
2921 Sorry, I’m really too stuffed for a dessert. 1.2045 0.04891 88 72 14 2
2922 Congratulations on your second wedding. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2923 Attempting to hop the tab is strongly discouraged here. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2924 Upon reflection, madam, a sparkling red wine would be very suitable. 1.2043 0.04727 93 76 15 2
2925 Your date arrived, madam 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2926 I always told him he had great taste. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2927 It’s nice to see he is the Special because he was so special. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2928 Are you ready for your Match.com date? 1.2043 0.05198 93 78 11 4
2929 Oh my darling, he always was so self-serving. 1.2043 0.05418 93 79 9 5
2930 Voila! The Salome special, madame. 1.2043 0.04968 93 77 13 3
2931 Pinot or Sauvignon Blanc, what would you recommend? 1.2041 0.05016 98 82 12 4
2932 Alas, poor Manty, I knew him…and now I will chew him. 1.2031 0.06370 64 54 7 3
2933 Ahh, so much better than a cigarette. 1.2029 0.05684 69 57 10 2
2934 Our chef says it’s impeccably fresh. 1.2029 0.06047 69 58 8 3
2935 Thank you! I do hope you remember to keep my mate’s credit card – it’s our anniversary 1.2029 0.04877 69 55 14 0
2936 Your main course is, ‘three pump chump’. 1.2029 0.05684 69 57 10 2
2937 Ate with her last week, too. 1.2029 0.05684 69 57 10 2
2938 Just as you asked,sir. Head on a platter. 1.2029 0.05296 69 56 12 1
2939 I don’t foresee the filing of a paternity petition. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
2940 I said “rare”. I didn’t want a virgin. 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
2941 Your “Husband Tartare”, Madam. 1.2027 0.05435 74 61 11 2
2942 Voila, Madame! Our Honeymoon Suite specialty. 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
2943 Your ex’s head as requested, madam 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
2944 Can I pray before my meal? 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
2945 Pairs well with a natty light 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
2946 I do so enjoy a bite after sex. 1.2027 0.05083 74 60 13 1
2947 AND I’LL HAVE A TO GO BAG FOR THE REST 1.2027 0.05766 74 62 9 3
2948 Not the organ that governed his decisions was it Madame! 1.2027 0.06079 74 63 7 4
2949 This is last night’s fling. 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
2950 Your 5th husband, madam, grilled on old wood with a light worm glaze. 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
2951 Chef let it say him say his prayers. He will be served in courses. 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
2952 Praying I like what they’re serving. 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
2953 I’ve got the best divorce lawyer. 1.2025 0.05804 79 67 8 4
2954 A head for some head, madam? 1.2025 0.05215 79 65 12 2
2955 Your former husband in a light cream truffle sauce. 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
2956 Lightly roasted head of second husband as ordered. Shall I pour you another glass of aged nectar? 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
2957 And for your entree, madame, we have prepared your husband in a light pan sauce seasoned with a pinch of rosemary and served with roasted fingerling potatoes. 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
2958 I take it you’ll be dining alone” — Mark Kerber, Highland Park, I 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
2959 You know what they say: You eat what you mate with. 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
2960 Mother! You never told me you wanted to be an amuse-bouche in the next life! 1.2025 0.05215 79 65 12 2
2961 Your ketchup is on its way sir. 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
2962 Petit ami à themidor, spécialité du chef! Hope you like it ma’am.
(Hugo de Faveri, SP, Brazil)
1.2025 0.05804 79 67 8 4
2963 I thought I’d been ghosted! 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
2964 Oh Charles! I did warn you old boy. 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
2965 And this is our special — a great option if you’re dining alone. 1.2025 0.05215 79 65 12 2
2966 Your dish, sir. Served cold as requested. 1.2025 0.05804 79 67 8 4
2967 Don’t miss Ladies’ Night Thursday for female praying mantises featuring our all-the-mates-you-can-eat buffet. 1.2025 0.05215 79 65 12 2
2968 Prayers answered–Dinner with a man and no sex. 1.2025 0.05518 79 66 10 3
2969 For ze next course, madame, we have your beloved smothered in chauvinism and sautéed in feminism. 1.2025 0.04894 79 64 14 1
2970 “I never mix prey with sex.” 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2971 Great head!” 1.2024 0.05297 84 70 11 3
2972 Happy honeymoon! 1.2024 0.05561 84 71 9 4
2973 Mm… a happy ending. 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2974 Ohhh…I can’t wait to experiment with cannibalism! 1.2024 0.04724 84 68 15 1
2975 I trust that Madame will find her entree as delightful as the “appetizer”. 1.2024 0.04724 84 68 15 1
2976 Your Tinder date has arrived. 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2977 This was my husband’s top choice! 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2978 As requested, steamed head on a platter, sir. 1.2024 0.04724 84 68 15 1
2979 Your “Date Plate”, Madame. 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2980 Compliments of the now single female patron at table 5. 1.2024 0.05297 84 70 11 3
2981 Your mate served ‘après une petite mort.’ 1.2024 0.04724 84 68 15 1
2982 If he hasn’t already, this one is going straight to your thighs. 1.2024 0.05297 84 70 11 3
2983 Todays special: Your husband 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2984 Pasta Putinesca. 1.2024 0.05561 84 71 9 4
2985 Would madame care for an amuse-bouche before the main course? 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2986 Ah! You’ll charge this to our room, no? 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2987 You knew the deal when you married me, Jonathan. 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2988 Here’s the answer to your prayers. 1.2024 0.04724 84 68 15 1
2989 Your husband is here for dinner. 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2990 Plat du jour, cannibalisme sexuel! 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2991 You did ask for the head waiter, madam. 1.2024 0.05561 84 71 9 4
2992 Oh, and you said I was quite a dish! 1.2024 0.05019 84 69 13 2
2993 Madame, our patrons swear this dish is ‘better than sex’ 1.2022 0.05099 89 74 12 3
2994 I got rid of him last time…he just wasn’t the right guy! 1.2022 0.05099 89 74 12 3
2995 Happy honeymoon, madame. 1.2022 0.05099 89 74 12 3
2996 Uncle Ted? 1.2022 0.05577 89 76 8 5
2997 He never figured she meant dinner for one. 1.2022 0.05343 89 75 10 4
2998 Hubby plat du jour,Madame! 1.2022 0.04842 89 73 14 2
2999 They broiled him just the way you like it. 1.2022 0.04842 89 73 14 2
3000 The Head-on-a-Platter Special,Sir.
As requested — quite rare.
1.2022 0.05343 89 75 10 4
3001 Hello Lover”
In Her Best
Carrie Bradshaw
Voice
1.2022 0.05343 89 75 10 4
3002 Actually, most of our customers prefer it tartare. 1.2022 0.05099 89 74 12 3
3003 I think this was one of your favorites. 1.2022 0.04842 89 73 14 2
3004 Our delicious Head-of-the-household Head, M’Lady. Enjoy every bite. 1.2022 0.05343 89 75 10 4
3005 As you requested, madam: your husband’s head on a platter. 1.2021 0.04430 94 76 17 1
3006 And for the mother-to-be… 1.2021 0.04920 94 78 13 3
3007 I can’t eat that, it’s my brother! 1.2020 0.04758 99 82 14 3
3008 Ahh, this brings back my favorite moments. 1.2019 0.04609 104 86 15 3
3009 The staff joins me in congratulating you and your…ahem…late husband on the impending birth of your offspring. 1.2019 0.04402 104 85 17 2
3010 I knew Daniel would make a lovely presentation! 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3011 It was then that it dawned on Reginald how much the expression “have a friend for dinner” had changed so radically. 1.2000 0.05454 80 67 10 3
3012 We’re happy to serve your husband, ma’am. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3013 The children are in the nursery enjoying the torso, ma’am. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3014 Your husband’s head with roasted aphids. Bon appetite! 1.2000 0.05610 70 58 10 2
3015 My mistake madam, I was waiting for you to finish saying grace. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
3016 As you can see, the pheromones are still stinking hot. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3017 And just deserts for dessert. 1.2000 0.04126 95 76 19 0
3018 Your roasted ex sir. 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
3019 A TOAST TO AUNTY. EXCUSE ME, I MEAN TOASTED ANTY 1.2000 0.05097 95 80 11 4
3020 I told her I was on to her little game. 1.2000 0.05460 65 53 11 1
3021 Oops, I should not have come in drag. 1.2000 0.05047 90 75 12 3
3022 Do you have a cigarette to go with that? 1.2000 0.05097 95 80 11 4
3023 Dining alone tonight, Mrs. Mantis? 1.2000 0.04839 80 65 14 1
3024 He was just matured 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
3025 Chef recommends. 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
3026 We call it the ‘Sex-Free, Guilt-Free Special’. 1.2000 0.04650 75 60 15 0
3027 Mmm…looks delicious! Too bad he decided to get frisky on our first date. 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
3028 Not what I’d call a secret message!! 1.2000 0.05988 85 74 5 6
3029 He wanted you to know you were the best ever. 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
3030 Is it free range? 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
3031 Pray this is to your liking. 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
3032 The chef would like to speak with you in the kitchen before you leave 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
3033 Your usual as you requested 1.2000 0.04364 85 68 17 0
3034 Whose grace is taking too long now? 1.2000 0.05312 95 81 9 5
3035 I had him at “ What’s for dinner ? “ 1.2000 0.05454 80 67 10 3
3036 Put it on the table. Before a meal I do some preying. 1.2000 0.04674 85 69 15 1
3037 Well Sir you did ask for something that would be ‘a bit of me’ 1.2000 0.04965 85 70 13 2
3038 The chef recommends chewing. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3039 yum, one of my favorites. 1.2000 0.05883 65 54 9 2
3040 From the children’s menu. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3041 enemy served on a platter as requested 1.2000 0.05122 115 100 7 8
3042 As you ordered, sir. No legs, no thorax, no abdomen. 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
3043 Your date on a plate. 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
3044 Medium rare—just as you requested! 1.2000 0.05318 100 86 8 6
3045 But first, a picture to post on FB. The kids are going to love seeing this memory of their father in one year. 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
3046 As you requested he died peacefully from a bug bite. 1.2000 0.04674 85 69 15 1
3047 Ahh, exactly what I prayed for. 1.2000 0.05500 85 72 9 4
3048 Chef assures Madam this was harvested at peak ripeness. 1.2000 0.05749 85 73 7 5
3049 I don’t recognize him. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3050 He told us it was good for him, too. 1.2000 0.04839 80 65 14 1
3051 Mate a l’orange, for the lady. 1.2000 0.05883 65 54 9 2
3052 You said you wanted to get a head of the competition, didn’t you? 1.2000 0.05454 80 67 10 3
3053 The chef took the liberty of removing the cigarette. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3054 If I wanted my husband I would have stayed home. 1.2000 0.06003 75 64 7 4
3055 Yes sir, of course it is gluten free. 1.2000 0.06006 80 69 6 5
3056 It looks delicious, and the sex was good too 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
3057 It’s not so offal with the garnishes. 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
3058 But isn’t this a dish better served cold ? 1.2000 0.04815 70 56 14 0
3059 Couldn’t he pretend to be happy? 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3060 Hmm,I never really got a good look at his face. 1.2000 0.04965 85 70 13 2
3061 Am I to eat my brother? 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
3062 Here’s your pray” 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3063 Give me a moment, I’m saying grace. 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
3064 I hope he was as good in bed as he will be for dinner. 1.2000 0.04839 80 65 14 1
3065 His last words were “ I’m sorry. Don’t bite my head off.” 1.2000 0.04650 75 60 15 0
3066 Courtesy of the gentleman at the head table. 1.2000 0.04674 85 69 15 1
3067 He always presented well. 1.2000 0.05500 85 72 9 4
3068 Chef says he can prepare you the same way. 1.2000 0.04389 95 77 17 1
3069 Sorry, I need another entrée as I only eat vegan. 1.2000 0.04872 95 79 13 3
3070 Hedda Hopper 1.2000 0.04924 100 84 12 4
3071 Expecting? 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
3072 Amen to that! 1.2000 0.04793 90 74 14 2
3073 I ate the rest of him at home. 1.2000 0.05610 70 58 10 2
3074 I ordered this cold. 1.2000 0.05288 90 76 10 4
3075 Here sir this is our chef’s special. It is called my wife cheated on me with my brother. 1.2000 0.05883 65 54 9 2
3076 Your mate and bake special, madame. 1.2000 0.05156 80 66 12 2
3077 We will miss him, too, Madame. Please enjoy! 1.2000 0.05239 85 71 11 3
3078 Do you get severance pay? 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3079 As requested, poached al dente, with a generous side of Aphids. And sorry for you loss. 1.2000 0.05967 70 59 8 3
3080 He fell head over heels for you but we served the heels to the dog. 1.2000 0.05369 75 62 11 2
3081 He always was a hot head! 1.2000 0.05737 80 68 8 4
3082 I told him I’d have his head on a plate if he cheated again! 1.2000 0.06198 60 50 8 2
3083 Your complementary dessert, Madame. 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
3084 Finally, the divorce came through! 1.2000 0.04839 80 65 14 1
3085 Are you sure that’s my latest husband? 1.2000 0.04240 90 72 18 0
3086 Bon appetite, your fly in the ointment. 1.2000 0.05022 75 61 13 1
3087 For the main,your husbands head ma’am? 1.2000 0.04839 80 65 14 1
3088 Mr Putin’s head as requested. Ms world. 1.2000 0.04650 75 60 15 0
3089 Finally, future mère, your postcoital pièce de résistance. 1.2000 0.05695 75 63 9 3
3090 He still looks hot … I do wish I could have seconds 1.2000 0.05228 70 57 12 1
3091 Finally, I can just have dinner with no strings attached. I deserve this. 1.2000 0.04766 105 88 13 4
3092 This is the last place I expected to see my ex. 1.2000 0.04839 80 65 14 1
3093 I’m sorry, I ordered my husband. Send it back. 1.1980 0.04454 101 83 16 2
3094 No, I ordered prandials, not mandibles! 1.1980 0.05269 101 87 8 6
3095 Presenting poor dearly departed Aunt Edna, medium rare.” 1.1979 0.04826 96 80 13 3
3096 Thanks for giving me a heads up 1.1979 0.05261 96 82 9 5
3097 The Head Chef was hoping to have a word with you after dinner. 1.1979 0.04593 96 79 15 2
3098 Your guest has arrived. 1.1978 0.04480 91 74 16 1
3099 I’m so glad these covid restrictions have been lifted; I couldn’t find anyone who would deliver. 1.1978 0.04996 91 76 12 3
3100 And now for our speciality, Braised Head of Mate. 1.1978 0.04199 91 73 18 0
3101 Are you sure this doesn’t cause mad praying mantis disease? 1.1978 0.04996 91 76 12 3
3102 Sorry, we ran out of tails. 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
3103 He knew this would happen. 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
3104 Your prayers have been answered, I brought you his head on a platter. 1.1978 0.04480 91 74 16 1
3105 May I present you with your lovers head, cooked to perfection with just a hint of mantis mole with succulent aphids on the side. Bon appetit madam! 1.1978 0.04996 91 76 12 3
3106 *Gasp* my aunt! 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
3107 Compliments of our new female chef. 1.1978 0.04745 91 75 14 2
3108 Good evening Mrs. Mantis. Tonight’s special is husband amandine. 1.1978 0.04996 91 76 12 3
3109 I wanted to get ahead of my protein deficiency. 1.1978 0.04480 91 74 16 1
3110 I’m no cannibal but I will make an exception for Fred 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
3111 I hope the head is as good as the tail, ha! 1.1978 0.05234 91 77 10 4
3112 And for Après-sex, your mate, medium rare. 1.1977 0.04912 86 71 13 2
3113 Sorry, but I had requested that this dish be served cold. 1.1977 0.04625 86 70 15 1
3114 Tête de mari, a l’orange … 1.1977 0.04912 86 71 13 2
3115 Voila! All the benefits of mating, with none of the side effects! 1.1977 0.04625 86 70 15 1
3116 We’re told you enjoy eating your young. 1.1977 0.04912 86 71 13 2
3117 I warned you getting married was a bad idea. 1.1977 0.04912 86 71 13 2
3118 Prepared so that your children may know small taste of their father… 1.1977 0.04912 86 71 13 2
3119 Your usual, Madame”
or “the end of a perfect date
1.1977 0.04625 86 70 15 1
3120 No worries,Miss. The valet ticket is transferable. 1.1977 0.05183 86 72 11 3
3121 He just asked me to remind you to say grace. 1.1977 0.05183 86 72 11 3
3122 Madam, your ex. 1.1977 0.04625 86 70 15 1
3123 It’s a boy! 1.1975 0.05392 81 68 10 3
3124 And don’t forget to save room for our chocolate cake, its better than sex! 1.1975 0.05392 81 68 10 3
3125 This is sooo much better than biting his head off. 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
3126 Your spouse. Enjoy. 1.1975 0.04785 81 66 14 1
3127 Non. I said « flambé »!! 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
3128 No, Fettucine Alfredo not Alfredo Garcia 1.1975 0.05392 81 68 10 3
3129 I wish you a happy and fruitful pregnancy, madam. 1.1975 0.05392 81 68 10 3
3130 My husband’s head on a platter…perfect! 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
3131 He said to tell you he had a really great time. 1.1975 0.05392 81 68 10 3
3132 Whoa…that’s not my wife!! 1.1975 0.05392 81 68 10 3
3133 Perfect! I told him if he didn’t stop I would have his head on a platter. 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
3134 Don’t go by looks. I’m not vegan. 1.1975 0.05671 81 69 8 4
3135 Medium-rare, as you requested, Madame. 1.1975 0.04451 81 65 16 0
3136 Congratulations on your wedding, Madame. 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
3137 And at that very moment, Grace Hopper concluded that this bistro could no longer be considered kosher. 1.1975 0.04451 81 65 16 0
3138 Your husband’s head on a platter. 1.1975 0.05392 81 68 10 3
3139 Your groom madam 1.1975 0.05098 81 67 12 2
3140 This rare delicacy became available only upon a ménage à trois that went askew. 1.1975 0.04785 81 66 14 1
3141 Oh, I can’t. I’m vegetarian. 1.1975 0.05671 81 69 8 4
3142 Enjoy your honeymoon. 1.1974 0.05626 76 64 9 3
3143 His last words were, “Thank you for the orgasmic ecstasy, I give myself to you totally”. 1.1974 0.05305 76 63 11 2
3144 Here is your “Head of John the Mantis on a platter”
Would you like a side of fries with that..?
1.1974 0.04963 76 62 13 1
3145 You are quite lucky, most mantes would never do this on the first date. 1.1974 0.05305 76 63 11 2
3146 Apologies for the delay, we have a bit of an insect problem 1.1974 0.05305 76 63 11 2
3147 We prepared him as requested madam, crunchy on the outside, chewy on the inside” 1.1974 0.05929 76 65 7 4
3148 I hate leftovers. 1.1974 0.05305 76 63 11 2
3149 Oh mantis head how mantsy. 1.1974 0.04963 76 62 13 1
3150 A tasty reminder of last night’s sexual encounter. 1.1974 0.05626 76 64 9 3
3151 male, medium rare as requested. 1.1974 0.05305 76 63 11 2
3152 The answer to your question, there is no such thing as cannibalism. 1.1974 0.05626 76 64 9 3
3153 Ah, the first Mate of the season! 1.1974 0.05305 76 63 11 2
3154 It was prepared by our head chef. 1.1974 0.04963 76 62 13 1
3155 He had a cigarette, yawned, and happily climbed into a boiling cauldron. 1.1974 0.05626 76 64 9 3
3156 Oh, and you were able to keep his look of surprise. Merci! 1.1974 0.05929 76 65 7 4
3157 Glad my husband was free. 1.1974 0.04963 76 62 13 1
3158 Will anyone other than your husband be joining you for dinner? 1.1972 0.05537 71 59 10 2
3159 Cannibalism special . 1.1972 0.05161 71 58 12 1
3160 Stick to your own kind. One of your own kind.” 1.1972 0.05161 71 58 12 1
3161 Go ahead, it’s high in protein. 1.1972 0.05890 71 60 8 3
3162 Oh love, I’m so happy you could join me for dinner. 1.1972 0.05537 71 59 10 2
3163 At last, his head on a platter. 1.1972 0.05161 71 58 12 1
3164 Pedro? Who’s Pedro? I thought your husband was named Alfredo! 1.1972 0.05161 71 58 12 1
3165 Fresh from the wedding, madame. 1.1972 0.05161 71 58 12 1
3166 Tell me, waiter, what wine goes best with ‘husband’? 1.1972 0.05161 71 58 12 1
3167 He looked better last night. Must have been the fermented fruit. 1.1972 0.05890 71 60 8 3
3168 Ahhhh. The true and final consummation of our love! 1.1972 0.05537 71 59 10 2
3169 Don Orkin sends his regards. 1.1972 0.05890 71 60 8 3
3170 Ooh, the life insurance special! 1.1970 0.05802 66 55 9 2
3171 Waiter, what happened to the first course? I was planning on
getting some soup into this bug!
1.1970 0.05385 66 54 11 1
3172 Did you say this was your first or second husband? 1.1970 0.06190 66 56 7 3
3173 Such a shame. The sex was fantastic. 1.1970 0.05802 66 55 9 2
3174 Just the way you always like it! 1.1970 0.05385 66 54 11 1
3175 You deserve to get a head. 1.1967 0.06105 61 51 8 2
3176 I asked for a head of lettuce, but I’ll take it. 1.1967 0.05639 61 50 10 1
3177 Yes, I ordered ahead — how did you know? 1.1963 0.04491 107 89 15 3
3178 Today’s special is reccomended by our head chef. 1.1959 0.05000 97 82 11 4
3179 Voila! Ante-pesto. 1.1959 0.04780 97 81 13 3
3180 Appetizer mam,”body du jour” to follow. 1.1959 0.04780 97 81 13 3
3181 He certainly looks better than my last mate. 1.1959 0.04550 97 80 15 2
3182 I recommend you start with a prayer. 1.1957 0.04946 92 77 12 3
3183 45 minutes w/ King Bczzar. Check it out. 1.1957 0.04698 92 76 14 2
3184 To the victors… and to Victor. 1.1957 0.04698 92 76 14 2
3185 The gentleman at the bar sent you this 1.1957 0.04698 92 76 14 2
3186 Will you be splitting the check, madam? 1.1957 0.04946 92 77 12 3
3187 You asked if we ‘d serve a praying mantis. Enjoy! 1.1957 0.05182 92 78 10 4
3188 Yes, I told you to bring me his head on a plate, but not for dinner! 1.1957 0.04437 92 75 16 1
3189 Oui madame! Organic, free-range, bed-to-table. 1.1957 0.05182 92 78 10 4
3190 Welcome to Ladies’ Night. 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
3191 Presenting your excellent taste in a mate, ma’am. 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
3192 Your Peter Greenaway Special, Madame Mantis 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
3193 You said bring his head on a platter,right? 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
3194 Oh, dear! Wrong table. I said I wanted Putin’s head on a platter. 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
3195 Your date madam bon appetit 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
3196 I present to you the specialty of the house, “Lover’s Delight!” 1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
3197 She looks just as I remember her. Oh, and you can take the utensils. 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
3198 Little ones are on the way. Your husband wanted to
join you for dinner to see that you’re well nourished.
1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
3199 Prayin your mant is well cooked for you to enjoy

its alright, no need for praying mant is

1.1954 0.04578 87 71 15 1
3200 I see you’re having a friend for dinner 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
3201 Sorry for the delay, your mate was not very cooperative 1.1954 0.05128 87 73 11 3
3202 Revenge is a dish best served on a silver plate 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
3203 Bon appetit! You two make such a lovely couple! 1.1954 0.04861 87 72 13 2
3204 But this is best served cold… 1.1954 0.05383 87 74 9 4
3205 You’ve loved this. 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
3206 Ooo, I was wondering why Harold took so long to powder his nose. 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
3207 The way you like it Madame. Smothered in onions. 1.1951 0.05041 82 68 12 2
3208 But we haven’t mated yet! 1.1951 0.05331 82 69 10 3
3209 and now the piece de resistance 1.1951 0.05331 82 69 10 3
3210 He was one of my favorites. I bet he will be delicious! 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
3211 As you requested, Madame. Bon appétit ! 1.1951 0.05041 82 68 12 2
3212 Yes, That was the gentleman at the next table. 1.1951 0.05041 82 68 12 2
3213 His penis is in the soup bowl. 1.1951 0.05331 82 69 10 3
3214 This was a wonderful choice for a first mate! 1.1951 0.04403 82 66 16 0
3215 Preying Mantis 1.1951 0.05331 82 69 10 3
3216 Your husband’s head on a silver platter just as you ordered. 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
3217 He said, “thank you for as lovely evening.” 1.1951 0.05869 82 71 6 5
3218 Didn’t you say you wanted your husband’s head served up on a plate? 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
3219 Votre marie, madame. 1.1951 0.05331 82 69 10 3
3220 His head on a platter, just what I ordered 1.1951 0.05041 82 68 12 2
3221 How the 2nd date went… 1.1951 0.05869 82 71 6 5
3222 It’s all done with mirrors. 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
3223 Ma’am, your prayers have been answered. 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
3224 I always prey before dinner! 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
3225 So where’s the rest of her? 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
3226 What’s This? My first husband’s head? I ordered the ‘#2, Mate Plate,’ my 2nd husband’s head isn’t as empty.” 1.1951 0.05041 82 68 12 2
3227 He was quite the gentleman and paid the check beforehand. 1.1951 0.04733 82 67 14 1
3228 I hope you had a good evening last night? 1.1948 0.05558 77 65 9 3
3229 He’s the best lover I ever had. Pass the salt. 1.1948 0.05242 77 64 11 2
3230 Here you are madam. The John the Baptist plate. 1.1948 0.05857 77 66 7 4
3231 Brother against brother. 1.1948 0.04905 77 63 13 1
3232 I don’t believe that you didn’t de-eye it. 1.1948 0.05558 77 65 9 3
3233 His last words, Madam, were; ‘thank her for me. It was the best sex I ever had.’ 1.1948 0.04543 77 62 15 0
3234 Et voila! Tête de beau! 1.1948 0.05242 77 64 11 2
3235 Let me present the Baptist special. 1.1948 0.04905 77 63 13 1
3236 He didn’t understand me 1.1948 0.05558 77 65 9 3
3237 I guess revenge isn’t a dish best served cold. 1.1948 0.05242 77 64 11 2
3238 Say hello to your uncle Joe 1.1948 0.04905 77 63 13 1
3239 I can see you two were deeply committed 1.1948 0.04905 77 63 13 1
3240 Alas, poor Yorick! I knew he lost his head. 1.1948 0.04905 77 63 13 1
3241 Madam, I’m sure he knew you’d been preying for this. 1.1948 0.04543 77 62 15 0
3242 Was he at least good in bed? 1.1948 0.05857 77 66 7 4
3243 Today’s Gregor Samsa Special, Madam 1.1948 0.05558 77 65 9 3
3244 Yes, I knew him, Horatio.
May I have some hot sauce?
1.1948 0.05242 77 64 11 2
3245 As you requested. Anchovy Hollandaise,locally harvested Balut,and artisanal Mopane Worms on the side. 1.1948 0.05558 77 65 9 3
3246 This is from the decapitated gentleman at Table 4. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3247 Ah, breakfast! I’ve grown accustomed to that face. It almost makes the day begin. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3248 This is better than a cigarette, n’est-ce pas? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3249 Are the antennae crispy, as requested? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3250 How lovely! And they say romance is dead… 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3251 Our special du jour, vous. 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3252 No thank you — I’m a vegetarian! 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3253 Pity it has to end this way. He was quite good in bed. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3254 Compliments of the house, monsieur. We call this dish “The Last Insect Who Did Not Pay His Bill. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3255 Your are, indeed, what you eat, sir. Buon Appetito. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3256 People say your quite full of yourself with that big head of yours. 1.1944 0.04697 72 58 14 0
3257 I assume he won’t be taking the check tonight? 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3258 A good time and a good appetizer, what more could I ask for? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3259 Our feature is called One Night Stand 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3260 I don’t always prey before a meal 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3261 One husband, medium-rare. 1.1944 0.05814 72 61 8 3
3262 Madam, your dinner date has arrived! 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3263 Your ex a la plate, Madam. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3264 I’m an ant, not an anteater. 1.1944 0.05467 72 60 10 2
3265 No, our heads on platters are best served hot. Maybe you’re thinking of sushi? 1.1944 0.05096 72 59 12 1
3266 …but can I still vote for him? 1.1942 0.04376 103 85 16 2
3267 I hope it won’t be a boy! 1.1942 0.04986 103 88 10 5
3268 I’m having an old friend over for dinner. 1.1940 0.06104 67 57 7 3
3269 Mademoiselle, your late husband is right on time. It’s a first, and a last… 1.1940 0.05312 67 55 11 1
3270 Chivalry is dead. Bon appétit! 1.1940 0.05312 67 55 11 1
3271 Preying man-bitch 1.1940 0.05312 67 55 11 1
3272 You are One Amazing Divorce Attorney 1.1940 0.05722 67 56 9 2
3273 funny, it doesn’t look like John 1.1940 0.05722 67 56 9 2
3274 I’m so glad this restaurant is Bring Your Own Beheaded 1.1940 0.05722 67 56 9 2
3275 Presenting our “you are what you eat” specialty. 1.1940 0.05722 67 56 9 2
3276 did you add some extra masala in it, as i asked? 1.1939 0.04953 98 83 11 4
3277 I take it your species are cannibals? 1.1939 0.04508 98 81 15 2
3278 Sorry to say, your husband will not be joining you for dinner this evening. 1.1939 0.04014 98 79 19 0
3279 No, No, the head comes off after 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
3280 Well, now I know why Artie hasn’t been returning my calls. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
3281 Note to self: Update relationship status 1.1935 0.04652 93 77 14 2
3282 You coulda just divorced the bastard! 1.1935 0.05353 93 80 8 5
3283 Our love is rare. 1.1935 0.04897 93 78 12 3
3284 Its prayer wasn’t granted! 1.1932 0.05566 88 76 7 5
3285 Bon Appétête 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
3286 Madame, would you like to start with dessert? 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3287 Oh, gross. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3288 Is it cake? 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3289 As you requested, your “Steve” Wellington. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3290 free range and well bread 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3291 I told my husband to stay out of the kitchen !!!!!! 1.1932 0.05326 88 75 9 4
3292 As requested, the head of your lover steamed. 1.1932 0.04531 88 72 15 1
3293 Sorry for the delay. There was some confusion in the kitchen about your order. 1.1932 0.04810 88 73 13 2
3294 Hopefully I can’t taste his opinions 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3295 The Swipe Right Special, for one–enjoy! 1.1932 0.05075 88 74 11 3
3296 I assure you it’ll be as good for you as it was for him. 1.1928 0.04985 83 69 12 2
3297 Would you like to say grace? 1.1928 0.04985 83 69 12 2
3298 It’s better like this. They never want to spend time with the kids anyway. 1.1928 0.05544 83 71 8 4
3299 Take it back. Tell the chef I want something without claws. 1.1928 0.05544 83 71 8 4
3300 That’s correct ma’am, I saw this job as a chance to get ahead. 1.1928 0.04681 83 68 14 1
3301 Kind of makes the daily special not so special. 1.1928 0.05272 83 70 10 3
3302 Might I recommend a Chateau Criquette ‘07 to go with that Monsieur? 1.1928 0.04985 83 69 12 2
3303 You know, most couples wait to do that until after dinner. 1.1928 0.04985 83 69 12 2
3304 That’s not John the Baptist!! 1.1928 0.05272 83 70 10 3
3305 In today’s menu for the non-vegetarians 1.1928 0.04681 83 68 14 1
3306 Your Mate A L’Orange, Madame. 1.1928 0.04985 83 69 12 2
3307 I pray you’ll enjoy it, madame. 1.1928 0.04681 83 68 14 1
3308 If I wanted to get a head I wouldn’t
have come here
1.1928 0.05544 83 71 8 4
3309 This was the last unwanted guest. 1.1928 0.05544 83 71 8 4
3310 It was our third date 1.1928 0.04985 83 69 12 2
3311 If madame is finished saying grace, your entree is ready 1.1928 0.04681 83 68 14 1
3312 Our morning sickness special, very well done. 1.1928 0.04356 83 67 16 0
3313 This is not what I meant when I said I wanted to have my friends for dinner 1.1928 0.05544 83 71 8 4
3314 A straw? Certainly, madam. 1.1928 0.05544 83 71 8 4
3315 How thoughtful! 1.1928 0.05544 83 71 8 4
3316 Dinner is served. Let us prey. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
3317 His head, madam. On a silver platter. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
3318 He looks better! 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
3319 I know I said that I am so hungry that I could eat my arm off, but the look of this course is making me feel light-headed 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
3320 This is rare, I asked for live. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
3321 Last week it was amour at sunset, tonight it’s la tete at sunset. 1.1923 0.04848 78 64 13 1
3322 You should see what I’ve had to do to get laid 1.1923 0.06068 78 68 5 5
3323 You will notice that the chef was able to
preserve the big smile on your husband’s face.
1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
3324 I heard your boyfriend was being rude to you. 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
3325 Dang. Dinner is smoking hot! 1.1923 0.06337 78 69 3 6
3326 I thought we served you last night. 1.1923 0.04491 78 63 15 0
3327 If only every day were Valentine’s Day! 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
3328 Conventional wisdom dictated this dish was best served cold, but Roger was far from conventional. 1.1923 0.05180 78 65 11 2
3329 I prefer the thigh and breast meat 1.1923 0.05492 78 66 9 3
3330 He is just trying to get ahead 1.1919 0.04691 99 83 13 3
3331 Please just leave him on the table until I’ve said grace. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
3332 My date has joined me for dinner tonight. He’s right there. 1.1918 0.04640 73 59 14 0
3333 HUSBAND EN CROUTE! 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
3334 Madame, your sir, smoked and roasted. 1.1918 0.05740 73 62 8 3
3335 Excuse me,head waiter,I think there’s a soup in my bug. 1.1918 0.06062 73 63 6 4
3336 It’s made to your liking. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
3337 I was just kidding when I said I wanted his head on a platter. 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
3338 Our specialty: cousin under glass. 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
3339 Your recycled special, ma’am, well done. 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
3340 Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him…He hath bore me on his back a
thousand times…
1.1918 0.06062 73 63 6 4
3341 Ahhh, divorce. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
3342 A reflection of things to come? 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
3343 He just keeps on giving 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
3344 After the movies he proposed we go back to my place and then grab dinner. Works for me, I said. 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
3345 I told him not to out with her. 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
3346 Here Presenting, Our head turning dish 1.1918 0.05398 73 61 10 2
3347 When he heard what you’d ordered, he was steamed. 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
3348 I pray he’s better than he was earlier on our date” 1.1918 0.05033 73 60 12 1
3349 He always loved a romantic dinner. 1.1915 0.04849 94 79 12 3
3350 I’m sorry sir I had to choose sides regretfully, but I did add the lemon basil vinaigrette you’re so very fond of. 1.1915 0.05715 94 83 4 7
3351 Madame always orders the blue mate special. 1.1915 0.04849 94 79 12 3
3352 Et voilà Madame…Monsieur. 1.1915 0.04607 94 78 14 2
3353 “From your head waiter, madam.” 1.1915 0.05079 94 80 10 4
3354 is he cooked to your satisfaction 1.1915 0.05079 94 80 10 4
3355 I hope you enjoy todays special as much as yesterday. 1.1915 0.04607 94 78 14 2
3356 But…….I didn’t order the Special 1.1915 0.04351 94 77 16 1
3357 Today’s special :
“Cani Balisme au vin”
1.1912 0.04804 68 55 13 0
3358 Is it organic? 1.1912 0.05241 68 56 11 1
3359 He really was the catch of the day, Madame. Excellent selection. 1.1912 0.06021 68 58 7 3
3360 Aunt Jane always had great taste 1.1912 0.06021 68 58 7 3
3361 Would you care for some head cheese? 1.1912 0.05644 68 57 9 2
3362 Soon you will be doubly satisfied! 1.1912 0.05644 68 57 9 2
3363 Your, “John the Mantis,” special, madam. 1.1912 0.05241 68 56 11 1
3364 Gross me out! Like gag me with a spoon! 1.1910 0.04761 89 74 13 2
3365 You said fresh, right? Free range? I won’t eat cryogenically frozen. 1.1910 0.04485 89 73 15 1
3366 Head on Platter,sir? 1.1910 0.04761 89 74 13 2
3367 The chef believes it’s a dish best served hot. 1.1910 0.05270 89 76 9 4
3368 Oh no, no, I meant I would have his head on a plate after dinner. That works, but I still need to order now. 1.1910 0.05022 89 75 11 3
3369 Mandy Mantis had vowed to eat only foods that were “natural”. 1.1910 0.05270 89 76 9 4
3370 ‘Tis mantis, my good man…tis. 1.1910 0.04761 89 74 13 2
3371 On a silver platter, ma’am. 1.1910 0.04761 89 74 13 2
3372 I asked for babyback ribs… 1.1909 0.04379 110 92 15 3
3373 Well, so much for foreplay. 1.1905 0.04931 84 70 12 2
3374 Oh, dear, I thought tête de mante religieuse was something more exotic. 1.1905 0.06734 63 55 4 4
3375 So that’s what happened to uncle Waldo. 1.1905 0.05214 84 71 10 3
3376 The green stuff is the best part. 1.1905 0.05214 84 71 10 3
3377 The Chef’s Surprise is Aunt Ethel?? 1.1905 0.04931 84 70 12 2
3378 Is it a real hot head? 1.1905 0.05214 84 71 10 3
3379 Voila! L’ epoux almondine! 1.1905 0.05482 84 72 8 4
3380 My divorce lawyer is the greatest. 1.1905 0.05738 84 73 6 5
3381 Hey, wait! That’s my ex! 1.1905 0.04631 84 69 14 1
3382 Do enjoy your pillow-talk madam. 1.1905 0.05482 84 72 8 4
3383 It’s tempting, but I am a vegetarian. 1.1905 0.04931 84 70 12 2
3384 The husband al dente, madam. 1.1905 0.04631 84 69 14 1
3385 Exquisite taste in men, Madame! 1.1905 0.04631 84 69 14 1
3386 No, thank you waiter. I’m exhausted. 1.1900 0.04861 100 85 11 4
3387 It’s so you. 1.1899 0.05428 79 67 9 3
3388 Ma’am, I promise you, you’ve prayed long enough – eat. 1.1899 0.05428 79 67 9 3
3389 This will really please you, madame” 1.1899 0.05428 79 67 9 3
3390 Yes, Ma’am, It was Fred’s last wish! 1.1899 0.05120 79 66 11 2
3391 Awww, he looks so peaceful this time. 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
3392 He was a generous lover and an amuse bouche. 1.1899 0.05428 79 67 9 3
3393 Grass-fed,0rganic, Locally Raised 1.1899 0.05719 79 68 7 4
3394 He was always late to dinner in life, too, and now I see you’ve waited so long to bring him out that he’s gotten cold. 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
3395 He said he knew you. 1.1899 0.05120 79 66 11 2
3396 Happy anniversary, honey. 1.1899 0.04441 79 64 15 0
3397 Was your last date fulfilling? 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
3398 Will madame be ordering a main as well? You are eating for 300, after all. 1.1899 0.05120 79 66 11 2
3399 It’s from the gentleman who was sitting at the end of the bar, mademoiselle. 1.1899 0.04792 79 65 13 1
3400 Your husband said to say hi 1.1899 0.04441 79 64 15 0
3401 Your Mari a point, Madam. 1.1899 0.05428 79 67 9 3
3402 Well, didn’t you ask for the Head Waiter? 1.1895 0.04310 95 78 16 1
3403 Tonight, we are starting with desert. 1.1895 0.04802 95 80 12 3
3404 Was it good? 1.1895 0.05030 95 81 10 4
3405 John, the anti-mantis 1.1895 0.05030 95 81 10 4
3406 I hope this is as satisfying now as it was before 1.1895 0.04802 95 80 12 3
3407 I’ve grown accustomed to his face. 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
3408 Perfect for the first date. 1.1892 0.04343 111 93 15 3
3409 Free range, basted in virgin olive oil. 1.1892 0.05985 74 64 6 4
3410 Well, I guess we should have quit while he was ahead. 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
3411 Happy Mother’s Day 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
3412 Remember Henri, Mother thinks I’m still a vegan. 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
3413 I had asked for a head of lettuce. 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
3414 The special you ordered from the tinder menu. 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
3415 It’s the only way to get ahead in this world. 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
3416 Good Grief, it’s Alice! 1.1892 0.05667 74 63 8 3
3417 This is just an Amuse Bouche as your dinner is not quite ready yet. 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
3418 Your Lover with a side of sautéed veggies 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
3419 I am your lawyer, this your spouse, and this is a dream. 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
3420 pairs well with Pinot 1.1892 0.05985 74 64 6 4
3421 I like to eat my exes with a side of fava beans and a nice chianti. 1.1892 0.05331 74 62 10 2
3422 Hopefully, it’s not your husband. 1.1892 0.04971 74 61 12 1
3423 Madame, this time Monsieur is giving you head. 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
3424 I believe that I ordered the Baked Tergum! 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
3425 He had what you 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
3426 Perhaps he’ll be better on a bed of potatoes. 1.1889 0.04970 90 76 11 3
3427 Are my eyes really that big? 1.1889 0.04440 90 74 15 1
3428 Your mate’s head in a white wine sauce just as you ordered madam. 1.1889 0.04713 90 75 13 2
3429 Let me say prayer before I eat. 1.1887 0.04469 106 89 14 3
3430 Yum, the mansplaining special. 1.1887 0.05036 106 92 8 6
3431 Steamed hubby, as ordered, ma’am 1.1884 0.04742 69 56 13 0
3432 You’d never believe he was the runt of the litter 1.1884 0.05939 69 59 7 3
3433 ahh, so sweet, and we just mated! 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3434 I knew he was hot, the first time I met him. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3435 Would you like to say grace before I serve? 1.1884 0.04742 69 56 13 0
3436 ‘You are what you eat’…need I say more? 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3437 I said, “head cheese” not “head, please.” 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
3438 Ex-Husband’s Head with Scalloped Potatoes and Teiyaki Kale. 1.1884 0.05569 69 58 9 2
3439 First, let me say grace. 1.1884 0.05939 69 59 7 3
3440 Bon “eye” petit! 1.1884 0.05939 69 59 7 3
3441 Your date is at prayers and sent you his head as a starter. 1.1884 0.05172 69 57 11 1
3442 His days of bugging you are over…bon appétit! 1.1884 0.04742 69 56 13 0
3443 And tonight’s special: the head of your late husband. 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3444 You do seem to have a problem with long term relationships. 1.1882 0.05157 85 72 10 3
3445 Would you like some freshly ground thorax with that? 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3446 This is absolutely disgusting. 1.1882 0.04582 85 70 14 1
3447 It’s the Dolphins..Clarice. 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3448 Well, you’re right. I guess that is one way to interpret, “I’m having him for dinner.” 1.1882 0.05157 85 72 10 3
3449 You asked to be introduced? 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3450 Chivalry is dead. 1.1882 0.05157 85 72 10 3
3451 Why, it is the best in the city! 1.1882 0.05157 85 72 10 3
3452 Smells like chicken. 1.1882 0.05674 85 74 6 5
3453 I trust your bouche will be much amused, madame. 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3454 Marge, this is what you get for saying “Bite Me!” 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3455 Actually, just the check. 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3456 I only order this on special occasion 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3457 Yes, madam, well done. 1.1882 0.05422 85 73 8 4
3458 It comes with a Valentines message.”
“Nobody loves you quite like me!
1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3459 1.1882 0.05422 85 73 8 4
3460 Madam, I believe asked for his head on a platter. 1.1882 0.04878 85 71 12 2
3461 This looks delicious ,you answered my prayers. 1.1882 0.05674 85 74 6 5
3462 No frog legs? 1.1882 0.05422 85 73 8 4
3463 Oh, yes, it’s Ladies’ Night
And the feeling’s right
Oh, yes, it’s Ladies’ Night
Oh, what a night
1.1882 0.05422 85 73 8 4
3464 What is your most popular dish 1.1881 0.04386 101 84 15 2
3465 Madam’s happy meal. 1.1881 0.05017 101 87 9 5
3466 They say you are what you eat. 1.1875 0.04270 96 79 16 1
3467 He has always made dramatic entrances, why stop now… 1.1875 0.05652 80 69 7 4
3468 Normally we don’t cater to cannibalism. . .as a mammalian species ..but since some adjustments seem to be in order. . 1.1875 0.05652 80 69 7 4
3469 With the smile still on his face. 1.1875 0.05364 80 68 9 3
3470 That was no gentleman. That was my husband. 1.1875 0.04738 80 66 13 1
3471 She had lived, but she had also loved. 1.1875 0.04756 96 81 12 3
3472 Your post-coital entree… 1.1875 0.05840 64 54 8 2
3473 Our seasonal special, Madam: Braised Mate’s Head. 1.1875 0.04738 80 66 13 1
3474 Madame, your plate….er, your mate. Bon appetit. 1.1875 0.05061 80 67 11 2
3475 Voila, Madame, Le Spécial Divorcée. Reservations for two, food for just one. 1.1875 0.05061 80 67 11 2
3476 And as you’ve requested, it’s both medium rare and post-coital. 1.1875 0.05061 80 67 11 2
3477 Sir, it is rare, correct? 1.1875 0.04738 80 66 13 1
3478 Now, don’t judge. This was specifically written into his last Will and Testament instructions. 1.1875 0.05061 80 67 11 2
3479 Oh, my brother. I never like him anyway! 1.1875 0.05061 80 67 11 2
3480 I was informed by your waiter that you abhor dining alone. 1.1875 0.04738 80 66 13 1
3481 Your husband, ma’am, well done. 1.1875 0.04307 112 94 15 3
3482 Didn’t I order head cheese with that? 1.1875 0.05061 80 67 11 2
3483 He knew if he got dessert, he’d become my meal 1.1875 0.05061 80 67 11 2
3484 Madame, the Chef gives his condolences. 1.1875 0.05061 80 67 11 2
3485 This cartoon needs no caption. 1.1875 0.05196 96 83 8 5
3486 He’s still crunchy—the way you like your men. 1.1875 0.05364 80 68 9 3
3487 Yes,you ordered the selfie stew 1.1875 0.04981 96 82 10 4
3488 Madam. Your order”steamed spouse head under glass” enjoy it again. 1.1868 0.05162 91 78 9 4
3489 Thank you. This will be our last meal together. 1.1868 0.04665 91 76 13 2
3490 >Sigh< We'll always have Paris 1.1868 0.05162 91 78 9 4
3491 Uncle Fred was today’s plat du jour? 1.1868 0.04396 91 75 15 1
3492 Never used. 1.1868 0.04920 91 77 11 3
3493 Clearly you’re not going to split the bill. 1.1868 0.04665 91 76 13 2
3494 Now here is something to pray about. 1.1868 0.04920 91 77 11 3
3495 Only known ingredients! 1.1868 0.04665 91 76 13 2
3496 Voila! Of course, it’s organic and homicide-free. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
3497 Our menu changes daily, but for YOU we planned ahead. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
3498 Despite her aristocratic ways, Mabel was always ready to improve upon tradition. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3499 “You have no idea how long I prayed for this day. My compliments to the Head Chef!” 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
3500 Excellent selection, ma’am. I assure you he died happy. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
3501 The sex was great! 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
3502 Will this be separate or together? 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3503 The split fee has been waived, madam. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
3504 I fear your eyes might be bigger than you stomach. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3505 Madame, your mante religieuse a la Jean le Baptiste. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
3506 I guess her prayers weren’t answered 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3507 Pour vous, madame. Classic Baptist Mantis Head 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3508 More bred with that? 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
3509 A hot male head, just as you ordered Mam. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
3510 No thank you I dont mess with my own kind. 1.1867 0.04911 75 62 12 1
3511 Another bad Tinder date 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3512 Well, madame, I guess all female praying mantises eventually swipe left. Cigarette? 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3513 I told him not to worry about what’s in the vaccine… 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3514 It is prepared medium rare with red potatoes au gratin and soy beans in a cream sauce. Bon appetite Madam. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3515 As the old saying goes, ‘tails, you lose!’” 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3516 Agreed madam, his praying wasn’t nearly as good as yours. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3517 He was annoying anyway. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3518 Voila, Madame, the answer to your prayers, ‘Tête de Mante’ sans L’acte Sexuel.” 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3519 Not to worry, monsieur. It tastes better than it looks. 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
3520 They say “it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.” 1.1867 0.05597 75 64 8 3
3521 It’s served family style. 1.1867 0.05265 75 63 10 2
3522 He was a faithful husband – I made sure of that! 1.1863 0.04772 102 87 11 4
3523 I’ve been told you are what you eat, but this is a bit too sudden 1.1863 0.04117 102 84 17 1
3524 He was special. 1.1860 0.05101 86 73 10 3
3525 Well at least tonight I don’t think he will complain about the wine selection. 1.1860 0.04826 86 72 12 2
3526 The severed head of your ex-lover. Bon appétit. 1.1860 0.05101 86 73 10 3
3527 Great sex does increase one’s appetite. Bon appetit. 1.1860 0.05101 86 73 10 3
3528 On our FIRST DATE? Bill’s confident–I’ll give him that. 1.1860 0.04826 86 72 12 2
3529 Madame, the gentleman at the bar sends his regards. 1.1860 0.04533 86 71 14 1
3530 Compliments — and head — of the chef. 1.1860 0.04533 86 71 14 1
3531 Mate Tartare. 1.1860 0.04826 86 72 12 2
3532 Bye bye darling. Your genes live on. 1.1860 0.05363 86 74 8 4
3533 He really wanted you to have this 1.1860 0.05101 86 73 10 3
3534 Yes, just the way you ordered him… 1.1860 0.05363 86 74 8 4
3535 I knew I could trust you to find my nemeses, my twin brother. I plan to savor the meal. Thank you. 1.1860 0.05101 86 73 10 3
3536 Yes, we are celebrating our anniversary. 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
3537 As requested,your ex par boiled! 1.1857 0.05860 70 60 7 3
3538 I guess he did not pray hard enough 1.1857 0.05860 70 60 7 3
3539 May I presume this is your third time dining with us? 1.1857 0.05105 70 58 11 1
3540 Your lover, Madame- Done to a turn. 1.1857 0.05105 70 58 11 1
3541 Your husband was a rare man, but is well done. 1.1857 0.06203 70 61 5 4
3542 Madam,your baked mate 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
3543 I understand Madam is with child. Congratulations and bon appétit 1.1857 0.05495 70 59 9 2
3544 Send it back. I prefer my Karma served cold. 1.1857 0.06203 70 61 5 4
3545 A romantic dinner for one 1.1856 0.04476 97 81 14 2
3546 He got tired of waiting for you. 1.1856 0.05146 97 84 8 5
3547 Yes, very nice; much tastier-looking than my last husband’s head. 1.1856 0.04476 97 81 14 2
3548 Too bad our kids will never get to meet him. 1.1852 0.04343 81 66 15 0
3549 “This makes the sex you had with him well worth it.” 1.1852 0.05003 81 68 11 2
3550 Mate and have dinner together. He said you’d want it this way. 1.1852 0.05003 81 68 11 2
3551 Voilà, Madame. Tête de Fred au poivre! 1.1852 0.05303 81 69 9 3
3552 The rest,take out? 1.1852 0.04685 81 67 13 1
3553 Your dessert Madam 1.1852 0.04343 81 66 15 0
3554 The Charred Clone Visage with a side of Fennel Salad is one of our most popular dishes. 1.1852 0.05003 81 68 11 2
3555 Oh,Enid! I thought I’d never see you again… 1.1852 0.04685 81 67 13 1
3556 He’s marriage material for sure 1.1852 0.04685 81 67 13 1
3557 And, Madame, your bedding will be replaced by the time you return to your room. 1.1852 0.04685 81 67 13 1
3558 Dear sir, is this Ukrainian or Russian? 1.1852 0.05586 81 70 7 4
3559 At this point, she realized gentrification wasn’t all bad. 1.1852 0.04685 81 67 13 1
3560 An excellent choice of mate, Madame! 1.1852 0.05003 81 68 11 2
3561 As you requested. Here is your opponent’s head on a plate 1.1852 0.05003 81 68 11 2
3562 Grassfed and tickled between the eyes before beheading. 1.1852 0.05003 81 68 11 2
3563 That is not the one I gave you. 1.1852 0.05303 81 69 9 3
3564 How’s about a head start on madam’s departed.” 1.1852 0.04685 81 67 13 1
3565 As requested, the tongue has been removed.” 1.1848 0.04619 92 77 13 2
3566 Well you did ask for the head of Russia. 1.1848 0.05110 92 79 9 4
3567 May I suggest a wine to go with this, Madam? 1.1848 0.04619 92 77 13 2
3568 I think I ate the wrong body! 1.1848 0.05110 92 79 9 4
3569 It’s the Atheist Special 1.1848 0.05110 92 79 9 4
3570 Enjoy 1.1848 0.04870 92 78 11 3
3571 Heads…or tails? 1.1848 0.04352 92 76 15 1
3572 Your mate madam, prepared as you requested. 1.1846 0.06160 65 56 6 3
3573 I believe you wanted the father of your children medium rare this time? 1.1846 0.05756 65 55 8 2
3574 Alfred. Must you always be so biblical? 1.1846 0.05756 65 55 8 2
3575 Your lover’s head on a platter, Madame. Bon appetite! 1.1846 0.04850 65 53 12 0
3576 He always said his future was bright, the inside of an oven is not what I had in mind. 1.1846 0.04850 65 53 12 0
3577 We always appreciate it when our customers order a head. 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
3578 Oooh, yes! That’s the same expression he had while we mated, right before I bit his head off. 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
3579 Ah, head cheese! Let us pray… 1.1846 0.05322 65 54 10 1
3580 When in Maine. . . 1.1846 0.06160 65 56 6 3
3581 Good husbands are always extra-rare. 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
3582 Ah yes! My second husband, and well aged. 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
3583 I hear this Mantid Birria is to die for! 1.1842 0.04476 76 62 14 0
3584 Would you care for flies with this, ma’am? 1.1842 0.05528 76 65 8 3
3585 Oh, my darling Zelda, may God bless your soul❕ 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3586 That is NOT what I prayed for. 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
3587 And he thought our one-night stand wasn’t going to lead to a second date.” 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3588 He wanted to thank you for the beautiful experience. He was hoping to see you again. 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3589 Yes, i resolved to have a smaller footprint but I’m no cannibal 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3590 Salutations from out Head Chef. 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3591 The husband is served 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3592 I hope his top half is as delectable as his bottom half was. 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3593 Husband au gratin, Madame. 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
3594 You said you wanted her “head on a platter”…..VOILA! 1.1842 0.05837 76 66 6 4
3595 Just as I love my husband most, medium rare. 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
3596 les hors d’oeuvre, madame. 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3597 Mmmm! My ex looks delicious, chef! 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
3598 Here’s looking at you 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
3599 Enjoy your second date, madame 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3600 As you wish Madame, your husband’s head on a plate. 1.1842 0.05528 76 65 8 3
3601 So nice to see you again, if only for a moment… 1.1842 0.04852 76 63 12 1
3602 Take it back. I ordered it rare. 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3603 I’m afraid that this is the last time we can accommodate this particular proclivity. 1.1842 0.05528 76 65 8 3
3604 I know it’s too late, but he wanted you to know that he is sorry about last night. 1.1842 0.05201 76 64 10 2
3605 I prefer eating it raw. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3606 He told me that he quit smoking. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3607 And to follow,just desserts? 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3608 Madam…Your winner, winner, eat your mate dinner. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
3609 His head on a platter, as requested, Madam Mantis 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
3610 Sir, your date requested that you eat ahead until they arrive. 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
3611 ‘À la Holofernes’, Mlle. Judith. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3612 My husband was quite the gourmet. 1.1839 0.04486 87 72 14 1
3613 He said you should go ahead and get the check. 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3614 I found life with him to be unpalatable.
What other entrees do you have?
1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3615 So that’s what happened to my cousin! 1.1839 0.05047 87 74 10 3
3616 He never saw it coming… 1.1839 0.04775 87 73 12 2
3617 Tete de ton mari, head of your husband, Madame, grillee, as usual. 1.1837 0.04886 98 84 10 4
3618 I DO give it well, do I not? 1.1837 0.04435 98 82 14 2
3619 Sir, I was told you eat your own. 1.1837 0.04191 98 81 16 1
3620 I asked for the blue plate special, not his blue balls. 1.1837 0.04886 98 84 10 4
3621 He wanted you to know he was offering you life on a platter. 1.1837 0.04666 98 83 12 3
3622 This is what she was having. 1.1837 0.04886 98 84 10 4
3623 See, I told you I’d be meeting my wife here. 1.1835 0.04546 109 93 12 4
3624 Here you go… your lover’s head roasted and served with seasonal vegetables. Do be careful, the plate is hot. 1.1833 0.06056 60 51 7 2
3625 That’s when he knew he was in danger. 1.1833 0.05038 60 49 11 0
3626 Don’t feel bad. The males in our species know exactly what they’re getting into from the beginning. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3627 Let me count the ways… 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3628 Poor sap thought he got out of buying you dinner first. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3629 Just what you have been praying for Mr. Mantis. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3630 Sorry for the mix-up. I believe *this* is your husband. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3631 It’s part of our “connecting to our customers” marketing plan. 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3632 Dad? 1.1831 0.04623 71 58 13 0
3633 I ordered an Alfredo Garcia! 1.1831 0.05424 71 60 9 2
3634 Splendid! He’s better looking dead than when he was alive. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3635 He said the best way to a woman’s heart is through her stomach. 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3636 One solution to the “head” issue madam” 1.1831 0.05039 71 59 11 1
3637 Would you like to offer a prayer before your dinner, madam? 1.1831 0.05783 71 61 7 3
3638 After Glow Under Glass”, is what all the girls are having 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3639 Could I have something a little less…resembling?” 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3640 His head on a platter, monsieur, just as you ordered. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3641 Your main course, madame. One luckiest man on earth. Enjoy 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3642 We serve this with faba beans and a nice chianti. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3643 SXRiZLXX&@_$%LPTTE!*(ME3xpa!!! 1.1829 0.05522 82 71 7 4
3644 The Chef put all of himself into it. 1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3645 Now I’ll have his DNA in me twice! 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3646 Shall I remove the head for you? 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3647 Carpe diem? 1.1829 0.05522 82 71 7 4
3648 Of all my mates, he’s the head of the class. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3649 It’s from the gentleman at the end of the bar. 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3650 Congratulations on your engagement!
He certainly is quite a dish!
1.1829 0.04296 82 67 15 0
3651 You had the fly’s head soup,
I believe?
1.1829 0.05522 82 71 7 4
3652 Bon appetit!” “Utensils are optional! 1.1829 0.04947 82 69 11 2
3653 Et voila! Zee perfect ending to a romantic meal. 1.1829 0.05243 82 70 9 3
3654 And for dessert, your dinner companion returns. 1.1829 0.04633 82 68 13 1
3655 Voila, your mate is served. 1.1828 0.04310 93 77 15 1
3656 This is freshly prepared by the praying mantis at the next table. 1.1828 0.04030 93 76 17 0
3657 Just one moment, Bernard. I almost forgot to say grace. 1.1818 0.05461 77 66 8 3
3658 Is he gluten free? 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
3659 You ordered the “left over” special, here it is cooked to your perfection. 1.1818 0.05139 77 65 10 2
3660 Madame, mantis au vin 1.1818 0.04622 99 84 12 3
3661 He was such a dear mate in life. Let’s hope he’s just as tender on a plate. 1.1818 0.04725 88 74 12 2
3662 Our Carapace-io Sir! 1.1818 0.05766 77 67 6 4
3663 The first course of your head-to-tail tasting dinner, Madam. 1.1818 0.05139 77 65 10 2
3664 Excuse me, that’s not my husband. 1.1818 0.05249 66 55 10 1
3665 When are your babies due? 1.1818 0.05766 77 67 6 4
3666 Jeremy would finally see what his mom had been raving about. 1.1818 0.05249 88 76 8 4
3667 You’re the one who said, “surprise me” 1.1818 0.04840 99 85 10 4
3668 Your St. John the Mantis, ma’am. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
3669 On second thought, I’m not in the mood. I had that for lunch. 1.1818 0.05461 77 66 8 3
3670 I thought revenge is a dish best served cold! 1.1818 0.04725 88 74 12 2
3671 Your ‘prey’ Mdme. Mantis, cooked to perfection! 1.1818 0.05461 77 66 8 3
3672 Is he crunchy 1.1818 0.06055 77 68 4 5
3673 But you ordered your favorate 1.1818 0.04994 88 75 10 3
3674 You always hurt the ones you love. 1.1818 0.04440 88 73 14 1
3675 Sir, your Spam mold. 1.1818 0.05461 77 66 8 3
3676 Your date tonight. Served with a date sauce. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
3677 Didn’t mean the head on a platter bit literally. 1.1818 0.05139 77 65 10 2
3678 I ordered Eye of Newt, NOT Eye of Nate! 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
3679 Indeed madame, the future is female! 1.1818 0.05139 77 65 10 2
3680 Your grass fed hopper, madame 1.1818 0.04725 88 74 12 2
3681 Madam, John the Mantis as requested. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
3682 me when i say i love myself 1.1818 0.04784 66 54 12 0
3683 Wait, I should say grace. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
3684 It’s Jerry, my old lover. . . 1.1818 0.04424 77 63 14 0
3685 He should have put a ring on it. 1.1818 0.04152 99 82 16 1
3686 I specifically asked for it on a silver platter. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
3687 Prepared just as you ordered, m’am. Sassy with a dash of regret. 1.1818 0.04725 88 74 12 2
3688 I hope this course hasn’t come too early for you 1.1818 0.05139 77 65 10 2
3689 May you love him as much as he loved you. 1.1818 0.05139 77 65 10 2
3690 Your husband – au poivre. 1.1818 0.05139 77 65 10 2
3691 He knew better than to sleep with me. 1.1818 0.05461 77 66 8 3
3692 Is that my husband? 1.1818 0.05461 77 66 8 3
3693 Lovemaking makes me hungrier for him than ever. 1.1818 0.04725 88 74 12 2
3694 Ah, York. I knew him well. 1.1818 0.04725 88 74 12 2
3695 Dear Lord, thank you for this gift with whom I have just conceived. 1.1818 0.04795 77 64 12 1
3696 Head’s up, monsieur… 1.1810 0.04838 105 91 9 5
3697 It seems you came out ahead, Sir. 1.1809 0.04528 94 79 13 2
3698 Not for nothin’, sweetie, but I couldn’t help but notice that you’re all alone, no ring. Look, I get off around 11, there’s a great piano bar around the corner — just think about it, alright? 1.1809 0.03991 94 77 17 0
3699 Would you care for a side of your husband’s legs to accompany this? 1.1809 0.04528 94 79 13 2
3700 Your husbands head,Madame 1.1809 0.04774 94 80 11 3
3701 I brought you the last three… I know I didn’t specify but, did you have to bring him?? 1.1809 0.04528 94 79 13 2
3702 The chef – she thinks that you’re … expecting? 1.1809 0.04528 94 79 13 2
3703 Good heads up call on coin toss for menu choice, Sir! 1.1809 0.04528 94 79 13 2
3704 Just because I bit my mate’s head off, I didn’t expect you to cook it! 1.1809 0.04528 94 79 13 2
3705 Oh, Pierre! Yes, I will marry you! 1.1809 0.04528 94 79 13 2
3706 He was a good husband, he’ll be a good meal. 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3707 I assure you.Your mate is not that rare. 1.1807 0.04892 83 70 11 2
3708 Here is your dinner, sir. Debugged as you requested. 1.1807 0.05460 83 72 7 4
3709 I’m very sorry, Madam, but it’s too late to swipe left. 1.1807 0.04892 83 70 11 2
3710 Our Newlywed Special. 1.1807 0.04892 83 70 11 2
3711 I knew he’d come back to me. 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3712 That’s my husband, all right. Dish it up! 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3713 Yes, he is locally sourced. 1.1807 0.04892 83 70 11 2
3714 And I thought she had ghosted me. 1.1807 0.04892 83 70 11 2
3715 Yelp. 1.1807 0.04892 83 70 11 2
3716 I pray madame is satisfied. 1.1807 0.04249 83 68 15 0
3717 We call this – netflix and grill 1.1807 0.05184 83 71 9 3
3718 Looks scrumptious! Now would you recommend it pairing well with the Grasshopper cocktail? 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3719 I thought revenge was best served cold? 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3720 Always a pleasure to serve your husband for dinner. 1.1807 0.05460 83 72 7 4
3721 Ton mari a-la-carte. 1.1807 0.05184 83 71 9 3
3722 But M.Eric knows I always demand extra rare. 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3723 Leftovers again? 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3724 He was really GOOD 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3725 Oh dear, I prefer him on the half shell. 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3726 The “dish” of the day 1.1807 0.04892 83 70 11 2
3727 My husband has never looked so good. 1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3728 Voilà, Madame!
Will you“beheading” home afterwards, or are you staying for dessert?
1.1807 0.04582 83 69 13 1
3729 La tete du père! Bon appétit” 1.1807 0.05460 83 72 7 4
3730 She said the sex was absolutely worth it! 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
3731 It’s nice to see the ex-husband for dinner. 1.1806 0.05708 72 62 7 3
3732 My goodness, he’s hot! 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
3733 Yes, he looks much better this way. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
3734 Thanks, but I prefer them raw. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
3735 But the chef is concerned that we may be complicit in gender discrimination.” 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
3736 He was a good husband with a lot of taste 1.1806 0.04565 72 59 13 0
3737 But I requested medium-rare 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
3738 And congratulations on your impending births. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
3739 And with that, Heidi’s divorce was finalized. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
3740 Our family special plate, as you ordered. 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
3741 Like you, Sir, he sat up very straight, and our ceiling fan.. . . 1.1806 0.05354 72 61 9 2
3742 He was such a good lover. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
3743 I can smell the garlic. I told you I don’t eat garlic. 1.1806 0.04975 72 60 11 1
3744 Now for your final course, madame. I see you enjoyed the aphrodisiac. 1.1806 0.04565 72 59 13 0
3745 OH NO! That’s my Mommy!!! 1.1803 0.05486 61 51 9 1
3746 Your fresh catch, Madame, cooked to order. 1.1803 0.05964 61 52 7 2
3747 Milady, your EX-cellent selection has been prepared to perfection. 1.1800 0.04353 100 84 14 2
3748 Did you order the family meal? 1.1800 0.04579 100 85 12 3
3749 Dessert will be his thorax. 1.1798 0.04394 89 74 14 1
3750 Your honeymoon brunch, ma’am. Enjoy! 1.1798 0.04394 89 74 14 1
3751 “That’s what he gets for splitting the Honeymoon bill, madam.” 1.1798 0.04394 89 74 14 1
3752 And I thought my wife would be joining me later. 1.1798 0.04676 89 75 12 2
3753 You are the biggest praying mantis I have ever seen. And I don’t know how you are going to pay for this, but here’s your mate’s head, weirdo. 1.1798 0.04941 89 76 10 3
3754 YUMMY—While mating earlier, I was preying for this! 1.1798 0.04676 89 75 12 2
3755 You love it, we serve it 1.1798 0.04941 89 76 10 3
3756 Your ex done the way you like him. 1.1798 0.04941 89 76 10 3
3757 Your husband says Happy Anniversary: bon appetit. 1.1798 0.04676 89 75 12 2
3758 Madam, your husband’s head on a platter. Just as you ordered. 1.1798 0.04676 89 75 12 2
3759 Most of my bumble dates end like this. 1.1798 0.04941 89 76 10 3
3760 Did you want to say a prayer? 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
3761 A fresh catch for you, Dr. Mandible Lecter. 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
3762 Your usual Madame Mantis 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
3763 He was good but not great. 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
3764 A change from the usual grub, I see. 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
3765 Your husband wanted to join you for dinner… 1.1795 0.05078 78 66 10 2
3766 It’s steamed to perfection, drizzled with a rich butter sauce, and he’s nobody you know. Enjoy! 1.1795 0.05078 78 66 10 2
3767 Enjoy! It’s only considered cannibalism if humans do it. 1.1795 0.05078 78 66 10 2
3768 From the gentleman mantis at the next table, Madam. 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
3769 Take it back. This is not my boyfriend. 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
3770 The eyes have it. 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
3771 This is gluten free-right? 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
3772 He appears to have been buttered up first. 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
3773 You’re not telling me that’s John the Baptist! 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
3774 It’s good of you to have your Mama for dinner. 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
3775 boy do i love my wife so much! 1.1795 0.05078 78 66 10 2
3776 I always did like the taste of myself. 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
3777 It’s so much easier when they take ‘end-of-life’ planning seriously. 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
3778 Your husband, Madame, served with new potatoes and honey glazed carrot medallions. 1.1795 0.04739 78 65 12 1
3779 As you ordered, the head of your rebellious brother. 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
3780 The oligarchs took the body.You get the head. 1.1795 0.04373 78 64 14 0
3781 Our ‘farm-to-table’ special 1.1795 0.05078 78 66 10 2
3782 Today’s special, Ms. Lamarr. 1.1795 0.05396 78 67 8 3
3783 Your prayers have been answered, Madam.

And then, for dessert, ice cream and pickles.

1.1795 0.05078 78 66 10 2
3784 This isn’t what I meant when I said I’m having my wife for dinner. 1.1792 0.04196 106 89 15 2
3785 Viola, your ex. 1.1792 0.04405 106 90 13 3
3786 Can I bring you another stinger? 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3787 That meal is orgasmic! 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3788 And may I add the chef’s congratulations on your recent marriage.” 1.1791 0.05987 67 58 6 3
3789 He was all brain and no brawn. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3790 I PRAY that my MAN tastes as good as he looks 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3791 Oh, I actually ordered a fillet 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3792 I prayed it wouldn’t come to this… 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3793 Being pregnant makes me ravenous 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3794 And he said I was his favorite dish 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3795 It’s today’s special. When you’re done, would you please walk to the kitchen, we are running short. 1.1791 0.05597 67 57 8 2
3796 I am thinking I shouldn’t have planned ahead. 1.1791 0.05177 67 56 10 1
3797 i believe you asked your husband to join you? 1.1789 0.04728 95 81 11 3
3798 The girls wanted to wish you good luck at the convent and thought this would be the ideal sendoff. 1.1789 0.04484 95 80 13 2
3799 Bonsoir! Madame Veuve
Your special this evening:
the “Tête Aprè Coucher” !
1.1789 0.05180 95 83 7 5
3800 Your divorce attorney phoned ahead with your order, madam. 1.1786 0.05126 84 72 9 3
3801 The answer to your prayers, Sir. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3802 Monsieur, I’m afraid her eyes are bigger than your stomach. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3803 Your latest mate, Madame, with a side of crickets, just as you asked… 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3804 Madam, the consummate on a plate special. Head a la mode. 1.1786 0.05126 84 72 9 3
3805 Come again. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3806 Hot and spicy. Just the way you like it. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3807 Your special order, M’am. Will you be needing a shell cracker? 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3808 Sorry, no. I’m celibate now. 1.1786 0.04838 84 71 11 2
3809 Prepared exactly to your liking, madam. 1.1786 0.04532 84 70 13 1
3810 The gentleman wanted to send you a drink, but I could see the chemistry… 1.1786 0.05399 84 73 7 4
3811 I asked for it to be served on the side. 1.1786 0.05399 84 73 7 4
3812 He always said he could never take his eyes off me. 1.1782 0.04313 101 85 14 2
3813 Compliments of the gentleman who just blew out your backwall. 1.1781 0.05634 73 63 7 3
3814 Haute cannibalism 1.1781 0.04509 73 60 13 0
3815 You fool! He’s supposed to be for dessert! 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
3816 I see things ended well for him. 1.1781 0.05634 73 63 7 3
3817 Chef says you’re very fortunate as there’s just one more serving left. 1.1781 0.05634 73 63 7 3
3818 He never looked more satisfied. Now it’s my turn. 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
3819 Leftovers, I’m afraid. 1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
3820 Yes, this is exactly what I had in mind when I said I wanted to eat y̶o̶u̶ out 1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
3821 Just as you ordered, Madame,
Your husband’s head
On a platter!
1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
3822 You mind if I say grace first? 1.1781 0.04913 73 61 11 1
3823 But I ordered it raw. 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
3824 We have save the best for last, madam. 1.1781 0.05634 73 63 7 3
3825 And for dinner tonight, divorce. 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
3826 I love a hot meal after a first date… 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
3827 Your daughter sends her compliments,madame. 1.1781 0.05286 73 62 9 2
3828 Jiminy Cricket! It’s Jiminy Cricket! 1.1778 0.05139 90 78 8 4
3829 Voila, la tête du baptiste 1.1778 0.04890 90 77 10 3
3830 We call this ‘head over eels’, madam. Enjoy your husband. 1.1778 0.04890 90 77 10 3
3831 Coincidentally his name was Al Dente. 1.1778 0.04350 90 75 14 1
3832 It’s completely compatible with your DNA. 1.1778 0.04890 90 77 10 3
3833 We did a DNA test in the kitchen and it is definitely your own. 1.1778 0.04890 90 77 10 3
3834 Voilà! Pan-seared boyfriend with garlic sauce! 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
3835 I think I’m having a food orgasm! 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
3836 This is your third blind date this month. 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
3837 The “Head of Mate,” madam. 1.1772 0.05332 79 68 8 3
3838 ‘Twas in his will, Madame. 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
3839 The special tonight is Spouse with spring vegetables. 1.1772 0.04684 79 66 12 1
3840 Martha, what happened? 1.1772 0.05332 79 68 8 3
3841 Where is the rest of him? It’s our marriage anniversary! 1.1772 0.05332 79 68 8 3
3842 Poor darling, you always were a hot head. 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
3843 Madam, the Special of the Day,
Seasonal Ex-Mate with white wine sauce and lemon slices. Enjoy!
1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
3844 May I present your ex. 1.1772 0.04324 79 65 14 0
3845 No, thank you, I prefer to dine alone. 1.1772 0.04684 79 66 12 1
3846 Good, where I came from I would be called cannibal 1.1772 0.04324 79 65 14 0
3847 By the way, did you notice we are hiring? 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
3848 Gee, can’t an insect get a nice mammal now and then? 1.1772 0.04684 79 66 12 1
3849 The perfect date night restaurant caters to every taste! 1.1772 0.04324 79 65 14 0
3850 Would you like to see the dessert lineup? 1.1772 0.04684 79 66 12 1
3851 I used to be strictly on a plant based diet… 1.1772 0.04684 79 66 12 1
3852 Just set it down, I already said, “grace.” 1.1772 0.05332 79 68 8 3
3853 Al dente? 1.1772 0.05332 79 68 8 3
3854 Is it still crunchy? 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
3855 Ah,the piece de resistance of our mating ritual. 1.1772 0.05018 79 67 10 2
3856 Umm, this is not my husband” 1.1772 0.06178 79 71 2 6
3857 The pre head was fantastic I hope the head lives up to it. 1.1771 0.04682 96 82 11 3
3858 Your Steamed Lover’s Cranium du jour, Madam 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3859 I had asked for lobster tails! 1.1765 0.04484 85 71 13 1
3860 Man! ‘Tis delicious! 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3861 You have the rest of him on ice, right? 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3862 Your husband phoned and said he’d be late, Madame, and he is. 1.1765 0.04275 102 86 14 2
3863 Prayer Answered: Successful Bumble Date 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3864 Thank you for doing your part to combat the climate crisis and eating disgusting bugs like yourself. 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
3865 I am not a cannibal! 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3866 Well, this is awkward. That’s my brother’s. .. um. .. never mind. Can I see a wine list? 1.1765 0.04657 68 56 12 0
3867 Of course, the down side will be facing the struggles of single parenthood. 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
3868 It’s your ex, Herb, served with herb butter. 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3869 Harold, you cheated on me! 1.1765 0.05070 85 73 9 3
3870 As I understand it, his last words were, “Hey, we’re just talking. There’s no need to b…” 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
3871 He bade I compliment you on your coition. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
3872 Speaking as a Mantis-American, this better be good. You do not want to deal with a cultural appropriation accusation. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3873 Voila! Grasshopper Fricassee . 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3874 Let it cool some before you serve my wife 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
3875 eat it or your next sir, have a nice day. 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
3876 I said steamed; not cooked in a croaked pot 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
3877 Of course, sir, it’s always good manners to eat with the one who brought you. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3878 Just how you like it, rare mate. 1.1765 0.04657 68 56 12 0
3879 The moment mantis porn took a weird art house turn. 1.1765 0.04786 85 72 11 2
3880 It’s the special. I didn’t think you’d need a heads-up. 1.1765 0.05107 68 57 10 1
3881 He looks so much better roasted. 1.1765 0.04657 68 56 12 0
3882 I said, ‘Take the head, leave the cannoli’. 1.1765 0.05339 85 74 7 4
3883 what I always wanted! Served on a platter! 1.1765 0.05520 68 58 8 2
3884 If you liked the appetizer, you’ll love the main course. 1.1765 0.04041 102 85 16 1
3885 Beats paying a lawyer for a divorce 1.1758 0.04581 91 77 12 2
3886 I pray this presentation meets with your approval. 1.1758 0.04306 91 76 14 1
3887 Ah; she was so delicious in life! I trust she’ll be just as toothsome au vin.” 1.1758 0.04840 91 78 10 3
3888 Looks just like my ex-husband. Yummy! 1.1758 0.04840 91 78 10 3
3889 How did you find my husband?! 1.1758 0.04840 91 78 10 3
3890 An answer to prayer madam, your mate’s head medium rare 1.1758 0.04581 91 77 12 2
3891 This is your appetizer.
The rest of him is your entree.
1.1758 0.04306 91 76 14 1
3892 I believe this is a dish best served cold. 1.1758 0.04581 91 77 12 2
3893 Mmm, nothing like some head. 1.1757 0.04454 74 61 13 0
3894 Voila!
Votre 37th husband sautéed to perfection in our special house wine sauce of crickets, ladybugs, and honey.
Bon appetit, Madam
1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
3895 Helen Reddy would be so proud of me ! 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
3896 Perhaps this way he’ll provide satisfaction. 1.1757 0.04454 74 61 13 0
3897 ?Mr Mantis regrets he’s unable to lunch today, Madam. ? 1.1757 0.04454 74 61 13 0
3898 Head’s up for your choice. 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
3899 Here you go. One After-Sex special. 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
3900 Finally, a dating service more substantial than Tinder. 1.1757 0.05563 74 64 7 3
3901 Can’t eat that. It will keep hopping inside me to get out! 1.1757 0.05219 74 63 9 2
3902 And I’ll be right back with that catsup you requested. 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
3903 His final words were “Yes means yes” 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
3904 He’ll be served in 5 courses. 1.1757 0.05563 74 64 7 3
3905 It’s called, Lust for Life. 1.1757 0.05563 74 64 7 3
3906 Dinner at Chez Mating Game. 1.1757 0.04852 74 62 11 1
3907 Madam, the John the Baptist special. Enjoy! 1.1753 0.04399 97 82 13 2
3908 You say you met online? 1.1753 0.04637 97 83 11 3
3909 Well done. 1.1753 0.04399 97 82 13 2
3910 Yes, it’s free range. 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
3911 Are you sure it’s medium rare? 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
3912 As soon as he was finished,we popped him in the oven. 1.1750 0.05270 80 69 8 3
3913 I prefer him raw 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
3914 O, I really shouldn’t. 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
3915 Organic, grass-fed, range-free and according to the DNA tests, a very distant relative many times removed, at best. 1.1750 0.05270 80 69 8 3
3916 I wasn’t being literal when I asked for his head on a platter 1.1750 0.04960 80 68 10 2
3917 I thought I asked for a head of cabbage! 1.1750 0.05270 80 69 8 3
3918 Awesome! He was my former boyfriend 1.1750 0.05270 80 69 8 3
3919 And for dessert, a freshly harvested delicacy 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
3920 Your Sauteed Spouse, sir. 1.1750 0.04960 80 68 10 2
3921 The chef offers best wishes for successful fertilization and a swarming brood of larvae. 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
3922 This will go nicely with your Chianti,Madame. 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
3923 What’s that happening under the table? 1.1750 0.05270 80 69 8 3
3924 Thank you, but I clearly stated revenge is a dish best served cold. 1.1750 0.05562 80 70 6 4
3925 I didn’t want it cooked! 1.1750 0.04275 80 66 14 0
3926 La meme chose 1.1750 0.04960 80 68 10 2
3927 Served without karma. Also, the chef wants to know where you will be-heading after dinner? 1.1750 0.05270 80 69 8 3
3928 Yes sir, not a metaphor. 1.1750 0.04630 80 67 12 1
3929 Enjoy madam, compliments of an admirer. 1.1750 0.05270 80 69 8 3
3930 The Father of your children 1.1746 0.05787 63 54 7 2
3931 Here is your Mante Religieuse Frite: everything sounds better in French, including cannibalism. 1.1746 0.04821 63 52 11 0
3932 His new girlfriend sends you this, Ms. Mantis. 1.1746 0.06213 63 55 5 3
3933 Chews by date! 1.1744 0.04436 86 72 13 1
3934 I said, my first husband. This one is of my second husband. 1.1744 0.05015 86 74 9 3
3935 What’s going on, I ordered the vegetarian entree.! 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
3936 But…but we haven’t mated yet! 1.1744 0.05281 86 75 7 4
3937 I was hoping you wouldn’t miss dinner, dear. 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
3938 Tête de beau, madame. 1.1744 0.05015 86 74 9 3
3939 That’s nice of you, but I really just want a cigarette. 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
3940 It’s all you care to meet. 1.1744 0.04116 86 71 15 0
3941 I knew it, he was cheating! 1.1744 0.05015 86 74 9 3
3942 Check please. 1.1744 0.04734 86 73 11 2
3943 Boy, did my Tinder profile pay off! 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
3944 Your grasshopper pie, Sir. 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
3945 Compliments of the chef in honor of your honeymoon. 1.1739 0.05039 69 58 10 1
3946 OK. But I’d like a plate with your head too. 1.1739 0.04596 69 57 12 0
3947 Madam, roasted mate’s head as you requested. 1.1739 0.05039 69 58 10 1
3948 Ew. I can still see the eyes. 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
3949 Yes madam, your most recent ex. 1.1739 0.04535 92 78 12 2
3950 Are you sure that’s medium rare, Pierre? 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
3951 We hope you are enjoying the honeymoon suite. 1.1739 0.05039 69 58 10 1
3952 One anniversary special … 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
3953 I prayed and prayed for peaceable resolution. I guess it was just not meant to be. 1.1739 0.06179 69 61 4 4
3954 He told me this restaurant was to die for. 1.1739 0.05039 69 58 10 1
3955 We hope the madam is satisfied. 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
3956 Madame, as you prayed for, your husband, well done! 1.1739 0.05266 92 81 6 5
3957 Well done, as you requested, Sir. 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
3958 There you are: our AUNT SALOMÉ’ SPECIAL 1.1739 0.04596 69 57 12 0
3959 This is why I never got married. 1.1739 0.05039 69 58 10 1
3960 Pardon me, ma’am, but your husband is a bit late. 1.1739 0.04535 92 78 12 2
3961 That will be you, if you don’t leave our crop alone 1.1739 0.04791 92 79 10 3
3962 I’ll just have the salad. He was sooooo toxic. 1.1739 0.05445 69 59 8 2
3963 And your Valentine’s Day Special…” 1.1735 0.04358 98 83 13 2
3964 I hope you boiled this well. 1.1735 0.04109 98 82 15 1
3965 The first course is about face. Your husband’s. 1.1735 0.04593 98 84 11 3
3966 Madam, the cook was a little head of schedule tonight. 1.1735 0.04109 98 82 15 1
3967 Hey babe 1.1735 0.04358 98 83 13 2
3968 The usual. Shaken, not stirred. 1.1735 0.04593 98 84 11 3
3969 Madam, your date has arrived… with a side of broccolini. 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
3970 Thank you, garçon. He looks so peaceful… 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
3971 Is it your anniversary? 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
3972 Actually,I would prefer it cold. 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
3973 Enjoy your Lobster a la Tete. 1.1733 0.05155 75 64 9 2
3974 The chef flipped a coin and it came up, “Heads!” 1.1733 0.05493 75 65 7 3
3975 Your de-cap Ma’am. 1.1733 0.05493 75 65 7 3
3976 Oh my goodness, that is Uncle Herbert 1.1733 0.05812 75 66 5 4
3977 I only eat the body! 1.1733 0.05493 75 65 7 3
3978 Compliments of the gentleman sitting in the corner 1.1733 0.04400 75 62 13 0
3979 Plat du jour from our family to table menu. 1.1733 0.05155 75 64 9 2
3980 Once again, we’re happy to prepare your ‘dinner,’ but the owner requests that you refrain from having sex in the bathroom 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
3981 Send it back, that’s somebody else’s mate. 1.1733 0.05493 75 65 7 3
3982 Your entree Madam. Rare. 1.1733 0.04400 75 62 13 0
3983 He is eating one of his enemys head that he choped off in battle. 1.1733 0.04400 75 62 13 0
3984 Voila Madame! Pendant que vous priiez, Le Tete Au Jus et yeux écarquillés. Rare. 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
3985 Ooh, I’m famished.
I’m eating for 160
1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
3986 Enfin, Madame! Your husband arrives for dinner ! 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
3987 He thought he was rare, now it’s how he’s cooked. 1.1733 0.05155 75 64 9 2
3988 I’m sorry. We’re out of brisket. 1.1733 0.04792 75 63 11 1
3989 Your husband has such good taste! 1.1733 0.05812 75 66 5 4
3990 Your mate. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
3991 Told him I’d eat his head 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
3992 ‘Uh-oh. I told her she was too good to eat’ and she took me up on the dare.’ 1.1728 0.05209 81 70 8 3
3993 Just like his love-making: so very tender. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
3994 No thank you, I’ve already devoured my mate’s head. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
3995 This brings back such fond memories of my honeymoon. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
3996 Your triplet requested an identical meal! 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
3997 I’m sorry, but I specifically asked that this dish be served cold. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
3998 That is NOT what I ordered. 1.1728 0.05209 81 70 8 3
3999 After months of trying, Monty thought of the perfect way to celebrate news of their little one. 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
4000 I ordered John the Baptist! 1.1728 0.05209 81 70 8 3
4001 Splendid. Can you also sauté his liver for dessert? 1.1728 0.05209 81 70 8 3
4002 May I commend your choice in mates. 1.1728 0.04578 81 68 12 1
4003 leftovers Madam. 1.1728 0.04227 81 67 14 0
4004 Heads, you win! Bon Appetit! 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
4005 That’s my cousin, George, he has always been tasteless. I pray that has changed. 1.1728 0.04578 81 68 12 1
4006 Today’s special is your ex-husband. We hope you will enjoy! 1.1728 0.04903 81 69 10 2
4007 Your head cheese, sir. 1.1724 0.05003 58 48 10 0
4008 Madam, Chef would like to know your preference: Tonight’s sous vide accompanied by fried zucchini? Or yesterday’s crudités? 1.1724 0.04073 87 72 15 0
4009 Yum! The Wedding Banquet. 1.1724 0.05575 58 49 8 1
4010 From form to table, as you’ve requested, Madam. 1.1724 0.04389 87 73 13 1
4011 I am way a head of you! 1.1724 0.05223 87 76 7 4
4012 Your mother-in-law, as requested. 1.1724 0.04684 87 74 11 2
4013 As you ordered Madame, Monsieur’s head on a steaming platter of “%#$&” 1.1724 0.04684 87 74 11 2
4014 I see your divorce is final 1.1724 0.04389 87 73 13 1
4015 You said your mate was a rare find. 1.1724 0.04389 87 73 13 1
4016 I said Rare. 1.1724 0.04961 87 75 9 3
4017 I pray it isn’t dry. 1.1724 0.04961 87 75 9 3
4018 Myron poached up nicely and will not contest custody. 1.1724 0.04684 87 74 11 2
4019 Your cloned head with steamed squash. 1.1720 0.04983 93 81 8 4
4020 Yes, he complained about finding a bug in the soup. 1.1720 0.04743 93 80 10 3
4021 I’ll tell the children how good you were. 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4022 Here’s your cousin Mike.
I’ll be right back with your bib.
1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4023 Where is my after dinner cigarette? 1.1719 0.06122 64 56 5 3
4024 Bless us, O Lord, and these Thy gifts, which we are about to receive from Thy bounty 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4025 Your prayers have been answered. It’s your ex. 1.1719 0.04753 64 53 11 0
4026 But sir, you said you would suggest something off the top of your head! 1.1719 0.05702 64 55 7 2
4027 And for Madame, the Valentine’s Day special… 1.1719 0.05249 64 54 9 1
4028 After all his efforts, its nice to see that he is served properly. 1.1717 0.04771 99 86 9 4
4029 Prepared as you requested. 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
4030 I’m sure he was a good neighbor, but his prolonged drinking caused him to lose his head. 1.1714 0.04537 70 58 12 0
4031 Finally my date arrived! 1.1714 0.05745 70 61 6 3
4032 Special of the day: You are what you eat. 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
4033 Madame, it is my pleasure to present your ex-husband, well-done. 1.1714 0.05745 70 61 6 3
4034 Oh my God! Aunt Irma! 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
4035 So he’s eaten already then. 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
4036 What?! No frim-fram sauce? 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
4037 Apres the main course 1.1714 0.06095 70 62 4 4
4038 I’M ASSUMING IT’S NO ONE YOU KNOW 1.1714 0.05373 70 60 8 2
4039 And did you enjoy the consommé? 1.1714 0.04973 70 59 10 1
4040 I always come here on first dates. 1.1714 0.05745 70 61 6 3
4041 Mate du jour. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
4042 That reminds me of someone I used to know. 1.1711 0.05425 76 66 7 3
4043 Oh, for Pete’s sake Harold, I’ve always drawn the line at folks I knew. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
4044 Compliments of the only gentleman at the bar not looking this way. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
4045 You can dispense with the knife and fork. 1.1711 0.05425 76 66 7 3
4046 He never understood why I called him “SweetMeat.” 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4047 Matilda?!!! 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4048 I thought it would come with arms. 1.1711 0.04348 76 63 13 0
4049 Gee, he looks awfully familiar. 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4050 Love ‘em and eat ‘em! I’m a man eater! Yum! 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4051 Would like to meet the chef in the back once you are finished with your meal? 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4052 Doesn’t he look handsome! 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
4053 WHEN ARE YOU DUE? 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4054 Yes,as a matter of fact we do serve mantis. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
4055 You’ve made some of the other wives who are here tonight quite jealous. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
4056 Somehow you’ve managed to destroy the ecosystem and consume everything below you in the food chain. This is all that’s left. 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4057 …….Amen.
I am, after all, still a practicing praying mantis.
1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
4058 Apparently, praying didn’t help your friend. 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4059 My prayers worked. He didn’t ghost me after all. 1.1711 0.06037 76 68 3 5
4060 Excuse me, is this vegetarian? 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4061 Oh, the best part! I must have missed it yesterday. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
4062 Salome, I bring you the head of your husband. Dance rehearsal was awesome today. 1.1711 0.05425 76 66 7 3
4063 Wallah! Happy anniversary. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
4064 Tofurtis™ – at finer restaurants everywhere 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4065 Madame, your special order: Capo di Spouse 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4066 Here you are, ma’am. He didn’t scream at all. 1.1711 0.04734 76 64 11 1
4067 Don’t worry. He was no one you knew. 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4068 Or would you prefer the more traditional post-coital cigarette? 1.1711 0.05091 76 65 9 2
4069 Enjoy your date. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
4070 Dinner is served. Your husbands head on a plate. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
4071 Voila …..as you ordered head on a platter…enjoy. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
4072 Yes it’s my husband, and he’s finally using his head for something good for a change. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
4073 I pray, garçon, that it is medium rare. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
4074 That explains why my date is a no-show 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
4075 You did say you wanted to take your husband out for dinner 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
4076 Oh I couldn’t. …Well, it would be just desserts! 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
4077 Here are your “leftovers” 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
4078 Will the rest of him fit in a doggie bag? 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
4079 Your date instructed me to tell you that he believes that he would pair well with tonight’s Sangiovese. 1.1707 0.05149 82 71 8 3
4080 Your mate mam, just the way you like it, dead. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
4081 Ten of my colleagues will be along shortly with the rest 1.1707 0.04181 82 68 14 0
4082 Dining here is like an out of body experience. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
4083 Our apologies. Please do visit us again during off mating season. We promise we will satiate your cravings for sampling the full range of this delicacy. 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
4084 Please take this back. I ordered Henry not Harold. 1.1707 0.04527 82 69 12 1
4085 So would you like the rest of the body? 1.1707 0.04848 82 70 10 2
4086 It’s so nice to go out once in a while and get a meal pre-mated and decapitated 1.1705 0.04634 88 75 11 2
4087 You call this rare? 1.1705 0.04031 88 73 15 0
4088 You mate is served! 1.1705 0.04343 88 74 13 1
4089 Oh my, I think I’m going to be sick 1.1705 0.04634 88 75 11 2
4090 As requested!”
Sans Sous Vide
1.1705 0.04634 88 75 11 2
4091 His prayer was answered,and now for your’s,ma’am. 1.1705 0.04343 88 74 13 1
4092 You Cannibal Special includes one trip to our salad bar. ENjoy! 1.1705 0.04908 88 76 9 3
4093 Lovemaking always makes me ravenous! 1.1705 0.04031 88 73 15 0
4094 Your mate, bordelaise, madam. 1.1705 0.04031 88 73 15 0
4095 Is your husband’s head done to your liking Madam? 1.1705 0.04343 88 74 13 1
4096 Send my compliments to the head chef. 1.1705 0.04343 88 74 13 1
4097 Take it back, it does not look like my husband. 1.1705 0.04343 88 74 13 1
4098 She’ll never undermine your authority ever again, Sir. 1.1705 0.04634 88 75 11 2
4099 Your Mate oh Queen 1.1705 0.04634 88 75 11 2
4100 The special today is the chef. 1.1705 0.04634 88 75 11 2
4101 You’re husband. 1.1705 0.04908 88 76 9 3
4102 Sir, here’s your lovebug. 1.1705 0.04343 88 74 13 1
4103 Your opponent’s head sir…served up on a platter as you requested 1.1705 0.04908 88 76 9 3
4104 He was your choice, Madame. 1.1702 0.04446 94 80 12 2
4105 Will your husband be joining you for dinner? 1.1702 0.04696 94 81 10 3
4106 Looks a tad overcooked. Revenge is best served cold. 1.1702 0.04180 94 79 14 1
4107 Hmmm, I find it a bit tasteless without sex. 1.1702 0.04696 94 81 10 3
4108 Your Dead Head House Special, Madam. 1.1702 0.04180 94 79 14 1
4109 That looks beautiful. 1.1700 0.04507 100 86 11 3
4110 I said, ‘Bring me the head of Garcia, alfredo.’ 1.1700 0.04034 100 84 15 1
4111 Your spouse’s head, on a bed of risotto. 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4112 Sautéed Sauterelle s’il vous plaît. 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
4113 OH
HIM AGAIN ?
1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4114 I knew if I worked hard I’d get ahead 1.1692 0.04687 65 54 11 0
4115 Do you need a moment for grace? 1.1692 0.05620 65 56 7 2
4116 I’m not a cannibal;
I ordered pheasANT under glass!
1.1690 0.04479 71 59 12 0
4117 I guess the meeting didn’t go as planned. 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
4118 Mr. Waiter Man: as a Female Praying Matis, who kill and eat males after copulation, I suggest you clock out and go home to avoid trauma. You can remove my utensils. Thank you for your service. 1.1690 0.05302 71 61 8 2
4119 Leviticus 26:29 (artist rendition) 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
4120 Sir, this dish is usually served cold. 1.1690 0.04479 71 59 12 0
4121 Alas, poor Yorick, I really didn’t get to know him. 1.1690 0.04479 71 59 12 0
4122 Good evening,madam,welcome back.
Tonight’s Special: last night’s date.
1.1690 0.05302 71 61 8 2
4123 As requested, Madame, your husband’s head on a platter. 1.1690 0.04479 71 59 12 0
4124 The wrong one 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
4125 I knew before we’d ordered appetizers that he was the one. 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
4126 Your ex as requested ma’am, served cold. 1.1690 0.05669 71 62 6 3
4127 When I asked if you could serve some of my relatives, that’s not exactly what I meant. 1.1690 0.05669 71 62 6 3
4128 Your head, sir, on a silver platter. 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
4129 I brought my own booze, too. 1.1690 0.04908 71 60 10 1
4130 It was organically raised, no pesticides. 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
4131 Getting ahead in the Mantis world. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
4132 Maybe I’ll skip saying Grace this time. 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
4133 I can’t believe I ate the whole thing. 1.1688 0.04297 77 64 13 0
4134 His last request was that you have it on a platter,Madame. 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
4135 We couldn’t find your significant other. I hope this will be suitable. 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
4136 Wrong table,I ordered for human head 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
4137 Suck dat head, cher. 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
4138 Well, they say you are what you eat. 1.1688 0.04297 77 64 13 0
4139 The gentleman asked me to say: ‘Martha, will you marry me?’ 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
4140 Oh, Henry!!! You smell DELICIOUS 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
4141 I hope he is better as a meal than he was as a lover! 1.1688 0.04297 77 64 13 0
4142 So where is the bernaise sauce? 1.1688 0.05030 77 66 9 2
4143 I ordered Jill, not Jack” 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
4144 Hold off. I’m saying grace. 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
4145 Is it locally sourced or farm-raised? 1.1688 0.04678 77 65 11 1
4146 Sloppy Seconds? 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
4147 Excuse me, but I’m praying 1.1687 0.05091 83 72 8 3
4148 He looks so peaceful! 1.1687 0.04135 83 69 14 0
4149 I asked for well-zapped. 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
4150 I find celebrating a divorce reminds you of the good times! 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
4151 We’ve checked, it’s no one you know. 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
4152 Here is your Cricket à la cannibalo! 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
4153 You asked for a little. Head 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
4154 What a guy!
He offered me dinner just for the sex.
1.1687 0.05091 83 72 8 3
4155 He said he’s happy he remained a virgin so long. 1.1687 0.04793 83 71 10 2
4156 Marriage counseling BUGS me; I may have a taste of this option. 1.1687 0.04476 83 70 12 1
4157 That’s hot. 1.1685 0.04586 89 76 11 2
4158 I said thighs,not eyes 1.1685 0.04586 89 76 11 2
4159 Here you are madam; your mate served, sauteed to perfection. Would you like wine with your meal? 1.1685 0.04299 89 75 13 1
4160 Oh yes! We had sex last night & then I killed him!!! 1.1685 0.04856 89 77 9 3
4161 May I suggest a Dom Pérignon 2003 to celebrate your nuptials? 1.1685 0.04299 89 75 13 1
4162 Ethel knew she had found her soul mate when he didn’t run off after making out.” 1.1685 0.04586 89 76 11 2
4163 So that’s why he’s so late… 1.1685 0.04299 89 75 13 1
4164 Is this the Cockroach Roast I ordered? 1.1685 0.04856 89 77 9 3
4165 He made a fine husband and a finer meal. 1.1685 0.03991 89 74 15 0
4166 ”Before we made out he said “Never treat me like snack food.” So, I haven’t.’ 1.1685 0.04299 89 75 13 1
4167 it was only a rescue 1.1685 0.03991 89 74 15 0
4168 No, please fix this. I assured Fred I wouldn’t eat him with mushrooms. 1.1685 0.05113 89 78 7 4
4169 LET’S NOT GET AHEAD OF OURSELVES! 1.1684 0.04650 95 82 10 3
4170 because Science 1.1684 0.04884 95 83 8 4
4171 This is Fred. I believe he was your third mate. 1.1684 0.04140 95 80 14 1
4172 He was much larger alive. 1.1684 0.04884 95 83 8 4
4173 Tonight’s cannibal entree, sir 1.1681 0.04356 119 104 10 5
4174 Dinner for one. 1.1667 0.04845 72 61 10 1
4175 His last words were, “Wham Bam thank you….” 1.1667 0.04740 84 72 10 2
4176 I worked hard to get here. 1.1667 0.04427 84 71 12 1
4177 Is this vegan? 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
4178 I like to be wined and dined after getting intimate. 1.1667 0.04845 72 61 10 1
4179 I wonder which relative of mine is dessert 1.1667 0.04740 84 72 10 2
4180 And for your main course, madam: Harold. 1.1667 0.04539 90 77 11 2
4181 He died happy,no stress hormones to mess up the taste. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
4182 And to top off your romantic evening your date well done. 1.1667 0.04427 84 71 12 1
4183 Cannibalism! Yum!
But …I ordered it with asparagus!
1.1667 0.05761 54 46 7 1
4184 You did ask for the chef’s special, well done head with fried leaves? 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
4185 I’m afraid we have certain standards. In short, you will have to do without the ketchup. 1.1667 0.05233 72 62 8 2
4186 As you finish your prayer, may I serve the head of your mantis mate as your entire? 1.1667 0.04806 90 78 9 3
4187 Divorce Cordon Blue 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
4188 Wow, he’s far less attractive when cooked. 1.1667 0.04852 60 50 10 0
4189 Your arbitration special! 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4190 When you have a moment could you bring some hot butter sauce? 1.1667 0.05903 60 52 6 2
4191 Courtesy of the gentleman by the bar, Madam 1.1667 0.04360 96 82 12 2
4192 Sir, You’ve served the main course before I’ve had the appetizer! 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
4193 Seriously? I just sent him into the kitchen to compliment the chef. 1.1667 0.04845 72 61 10 1
4194 That’s not the platter I asked for. 1.1667 0.04423 72 60 12 0
4195 And the rest will be in your doggie bag, Madam! 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
4196 Voila’ Madame….Mantis a La Mode! 1.1667 0.05540 66 57 7 2
4197 Your dinner companion Madame. 1.1667 0.05595 72 63 6 3
4198 Tasteless, maybe to you! 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4199 If this is especially to your liking, I can serve the rest of the body as well. 1.1667 0.04091 84 70 14 0
4200 I always wanted his head on a silver platter. Thank you! 1.1667 0.04539 90 77 11 2
4201 With the chef’s compliments, à la tête de jour. 1.1667 0.03708 102 85 17 0
4202 That’s not my husband! What kind of a hussy do you take me for? 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
4203 Chef has agreed BYOB can include Boyfriend… 1.1667 0.04539 90 77 11 2
4204 Tell the chef I like my food raw 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
4205 She always was a tasty little dish!!! 1.1667 0.05595 72 63 6 3
4206 Unfortunate he’ll miss the reveal party. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
4207 I hate my job so much. I wish it was my head on that fucking plate. I’ve got an MBA from Harvard and here I am serving heads to bugs! Yeah, that’s right. I said it. Bugs! You’re a BUG! ‘Nurr that’s OUR word’. Blow me. Call the manager. I don’t care 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
4208 When you’re done with this, there’s speed dating in the other room. 1.1667 0.04539 90 77 11 2
4209 Terrific! My ex on a silver platter. 1.1667 0.04845 72 61 10 1
4210 Just checking, this is vegan meat right? 1.1667 0.04623 66 55 11 0
4211 You know, most patrons opt for dinner first 1.1667 0.04427 84 71 12 1
4212 Wonderful! They’re so much better roasted. 1.1667 0.04423 72 60 12 0
4213 The main course, Madam. I believe you’ve previously met. 1.1667 0.04247 78 65 13 0
4214 Complements of the chef. Who is also your ex. 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4215 Mmmmm…How do always have them so handsome? 1.1667 0.05595 72 63 6 3
4216 And for the main course, sautéed husband. 1.1667 0.04806 90 78 9 3
4217 She ordered the cannibis platter, but the cannibal platter looks pretty good. 1.1667 0.04423 72 60 12 0
4218 As requested- our Mate-tredi Special. 1.1667 0.04740 84 72 10 2
4219 OH MY! I knew Jack. He fell head over heels with my girlfriend, Jill. 1.1667 0.04091 84 70 14 0
4220 Well, I see that dinner is on your husband. 1.1667 0.04604 96 83 10 3
4221 Per his last will and testament, I give you Spouse Tatare. 1.1667 0.05294 78 68 7 3
4222 We pray it’s someone you knew. 1.1667 0.05311 84 74 6 4
4223 Safe sex, with heirloom potatoes. 1.1667 0.04091 84 70 14 0
4224 I warned him not to make fun of people who posted their Wordle scores on Facebook! 1.1667 0.04539 90 77 11 2
4225 Your usual order Madame, prepared per your specific request. Seduced, severed and slightly sizzled. 1.1667 0.04247 78 65 13 0
4226 I told you that big head of yours would get you into trouble. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
4227 Your wife got served. 1.1667 0.04740 84 72 10 2
4228 Wow…the chef has outdone himself! Now if only he tastes as good as he looks!! 1.1667 0.05294 78 68 7 3
4229 ‘He had it coming,’ sauce on the side. 1.1667 0.04845 72 61 10 1
4230 Oh, no thank you, I just mated. 1.1667 0.05595 72 63 6 3
4231 Our piece de resistance, His Head On A Platter 1.1667 0.05102 66 56 9 1
4232 The head of the table, I presume. 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
4233 It appears I am dining alone! 1.1667 0.04623 78 66 11 1
4234 I wasn’t expecting to see my ex here!!! 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
4235 I understand you won’t be having wine. 1.1667 0.04970 78 67 9 2
4236 Your boyfriend has arrived for dinner. 1.1667 0.04740 84 72 10 2
4237 Your husband’s head with compliments from the Chef, Madame. 1.1667 0.04423 72 60 12 0
4238 Exquisite—And I didn’t have to sleep with him first! 1.1667 0.04806 90 78 9 3
4239 Madam, the head of the family. 1.1667 0.05233 72 62 8 2
4240 He didn’t look like his Tinder profile. 1.1649 0.04560 97 84 10 3
4241 Hmm,wonder what does cheaters taste like! 1.1649 0.04560 97 84 10 3
4242 He was a good man. Still is! 1.1648 0.04756 91 79 9 3
4243 It was difficult, but I’ve fulfilled your request for, “what she’s having”. 1.1648 0.04492 91 78 11 2
4244 Wait… I am not even surprised if this is allowed.
Olivia Xu, New York City, N.Y
1.1648 0.04492 91 78 11 2
4245 I thought I already had this course? 1.1648 0.04492 91 78 11 2
4246 Again? 1.1647 0.04978 85 74 8 3
4247 POV: you’re watching a mantis get fed a mantis head 1.1647 0.04978 85 74 8 3
4248 This is just an appetizer. I’m still dating to find the main course. 1.1647 0.04688 85 73 10 2
4249 I took the liberty of assuming you would call “heads” in the coin toss 1.1647 0.04688 85 73 10 2
4250 The latest trend in haute cuisine, Sir look-alike food. 1.1647 0.04379 85 72 12 1
4251 Er voilà, a taste of your own medicine 1.1647 0.04379 85 72 12 1
4252 Of all my lovers he had the best taste

Urs Gauchat
Cambridge

1.1647 0.04688 85 73 10 2
4253 We like to served it fresh. 1.1647 0.04688 85 73 10 2
4254 As you requested, ma’m 1.1647 0.04047 85 71 14 0
4255 I love being able to have dinner with my husband. 1.1647 0.04379 85 72 12 1
4256 The sex is better when you don’t think about it. 1.1647 0.04688 85 73 10 2
4257 And in honor of your first date, the chef has prepared something special for you. 1.1647 0.04047 85 71 14 0
4258 May we suggest pairing with a Femme Fatale Chablis? 1.1647 0.04379 85 72 12 1
4259 With your settlement attorney’s compliments, madame. 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
4260 Clearly there’s been a mistake…I asked for truffle on top. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
4261 You’re pregnant. 1.1646 0.05231 79 69 7 3
4262 Your appetizer, Ma’am. The body of your meal will be out shortly. 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
4263 I hope the sex was good. 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
4264 Who’s the other woman? 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
4265 With patience, the diner becomes the dinee, young grasshopper 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
4266 We fixed your date just how you like him. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
4267 Sorry, we’re having supply chain issues.”
Robert Weingast ,Manhattan, New York
1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
4268 Is it on the dinner? 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
4269 The first course of Steamed CanibalManta is on the house. 1.1646 0.04198 79 66 13 0
4270 And for dessert we have the head of the man you just made love to. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
4271 “It’s on the house this evening, Mademoiselle, and, may I say,congratulations, and best of luck with the birth.” 1.1646 0.04911 79 68 9 2
4272 Your husband’s head, but the dish is hot. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
4273 And you doubted me when I said ‘table for one’….. 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
4274 Here’s Johnny! 1.1646 0.04568 79 67 11 1
4275 He saw the bill at the counter and insisted you have seconds. 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
4276 I pray he’s cooked well done! 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
4277 His last words were, “I still love you! 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
4278 Today’s special – complaining customer’s head on a platter. 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
4279 I finally found someone with taste. 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
4280 What? No salad? 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
4281 Alas poor Yoric, I knew him… 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
4282 Your mate is joining you for dinner 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
4283 Yes, that was her. 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
4284 The chef told him he’d have his head on a platter. 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
4285 When I dine out I prefer to try something different 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
4286 He had good taste,tell me if he tastes good. 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
4287 Your husband’s head, sauteed, not stewed… 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
4288 I’ll have white wine, please… and some hollandaise on the side for my date. 1.1644 0.04784 73 62 10 1
4289 Your ex-husband’s head lightly braised, an excellent choice, madam. I hope you don’t mind my saying that too often mantises just let their mates’ heads go to waste after biting them off. 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
4290 this order is always served by the head waiter 1.1644 0.05166 73 63 8 2
4291 We hope you’ll enjoy your just desserts ahead of the main course. 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
4292 Your Husband, Madam, grilled to perfection. 1.1644 0.04368 73 61 12 0
4293 The last piece, just like you requested. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
4294 Your mate. Steamed, of course. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
4295 Oh my, I thought I’d never see him again. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
4296 Does it come with a side of ranch? 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
4297 Heads I win, heads you lose. 1.1642 0.04560 67 56 11 0
4298 As you have requested madame, “boiled as fuck”. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
4299 Oh my- Jimmity Cricket! 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
4300 Looks scrumptious 1.1642 0.05862 67 59 5 3
4301 You’ve been served. 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
4302 Would madam like the part with the condom on it as well? 1.1642 0.05462 67 58 7 2
4303 I recommend pairing it with our heady house red 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
4304 It’s wild caught, so we know he died happy. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
4305 Your husband, medium rare. 1.1642 0.05031 67 57 9 1
4306 Madame…your beloved’s head on a plate…cooked to your satisfaction and, oh on behalf of all the staff here we hope your pregnancy goes smoothly…. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
4307 Señor, could you bless this food – I turned away from praying when my father ate the rest of my siblings. 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
4308 I wondered where my brother had gone off to yesterday” 1.1639 0.05321 61 52 8 1
4309 My husband said he was running late. 1.1635 0.04345 104 90 11 3
4310 This Godfather anniversary has really gotten out of hand. 1.1630 0.04447 92 79 11 2
4311 The chef took the liberty of fucking your dinner for you, madam. 1.1630 0.05190 92 82 5 5
4312 Happy Saint Patrick’s Day! 1.1630 0.04169 92 78 13 1
4313 Your ex …… on a silver platter 1.1630 0.04708 92 80 9 3
4314 I pray sir that you will find this to your liking. 1.1628 0.04637 86 74 10 2
4315 Who says you can’t have your cake and eat it too? 1.1628 0.04332 86 73 12 1
4316 Now this is my kind of dinner! 1.1628 0.04637 86 74 10 2
4317 Your Father-in-Law, just as you ordered. Bon appetit! 1.1628 0.04332 86 73 12 1
4318 Why you should not always go to third base on a first date. 1.1628 0.04332 86 73 12 1
4319 It looked bigger in the picture. 1.1628 0.04637 86 74 10 2
4320 Table for one. 1.1628 0.04332 86 73 12 1
4321 To cap off your stimulating evening, ma’am. 1.1628 0.04332 86 73 12 1
4322 What, no foreplay? 1.1628 0.04924 86 75 8 3
4323 In that case, I’d recommend using a sperm bank next time. 1.1628 0.04637 86 74 10 2
4324 Just as you ordered, Mme Mantis, tete de mari au point. 1.1628 0.04637 86 74 10 2
4325 Oh, my heavens, it’s Nicky, my ex. 1.1628 0.04004 86 72 14 0
4326 You’d better it’s well done 1.1628 0.04332 86 73 12 1
4327 Strange, but whenever we serve Head of Male Praying Mantis they always have a smile on their face! 1.1625 0.04151 80 67 13 0
4328 It doesn´t look done to me. 1.1625 0.04151 80 67 13 0
4329 And you recommended a Chablis with this!?! 1.1625 0.05467 80 71 5 4
4330 Oh, he looks so delicious on the platter. Too bad he wasn’t a better lover. 1.1625 0.04853 80 69 9 2
4331 This was only our first date, I’m not ready for this level of commitment! 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
4332 What a lovely restaurant. If only my husband could be here. 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
4333 The head chef sends his regards. 1.1625 0.04853 80 69 9 2
4334 Would you like a cigarette with your meal? 1.1625 0.04151 80 67 13 0
4335 I’m praying that’s not what I think it is. 1.1625 0.04853 80 69 9 2
4336 The gentleman at the bar sent this. 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
4337 Don’t forget to say “grace”. 1.1625 0.04151 80 67 13 0
4338 Et pour madame, la petite mort. 1.1625 0.04516 80 68 11 1
4339 Aleck, I knew him well ! 1.1625 0.04853 80 69 9 2
4340 Yes, my husband will be joining me. 1.1625 0.04853 80 69 9 2
4341 Knowing that they didn’t have long to live, he sacrificed everything to be prepared for her favorite last meal. 1.1622 0.05781 74 66 4 4
4342 And for your main course madam, the ‘Tinder-loin’.” 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4343 There is a fine line between love and plate. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4344 I’m sorry, your date took a wrong turn on the way to the restroom. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4345 Hold on! What happened to the pre-decapitation sex? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4346 And he paid the check … no tip.” 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
4347 I’ve heard this dish is even better served cold. 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
4348 Someone wasn’t praying. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4349 Sorry, Charley, I thought I ordered the drink. 1.1622 0.05781 74 66 4 4
4350 Yeah, I heard mustaches have made a come back in a big way. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4351 Voila. I bring you the head of Alfredo Garcia ala Mantis. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
4352 If this is what happens when you trim your wings. I think I’ll keep mine! 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
4353 Ahh yes,and he was my favorite husband! 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
4354 It’s the only way WE give head. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4355 Your mate a la queen,madam. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
4356 Best first / last date EVER! 1.1622 0.05451 74 65 6 3
4357 All thanks to his mother. She raised him tender. 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
4358 I’m sorry, I said I prefer revenge served cold. 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
4359 I always knew I was the whole damn meal 1.1622 0.04314 74 62 12 0
4360 Excuse me, I ordered the vegetarian option… 1.1622 0.04724 74 63 10 1
4361 Do I have this right? First you mate.Then, the dinner date? 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4362 It can be thoroughly enjoyed during primetime news hour! 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4363 Bon Appetit,it’s your ex-boyfriend. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4364 Cannibalism, but legal. 1.1622 0.05101 74 64 8 2
4365 Lovely! You know, this is where we had our first date. 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
4366 I seem to have lost my head. 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
4367 Yes Madam, Stan will in fact be joining you for dinner. I understand that you enjoyed the rest of him before you arrived, did you?” 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
4368 Here we have “EAT YOUR OWN KIND” with
Borscht sauce and roasted potatoes !
“You Betcha”
1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
4369 ..the irony ! My fiance´s last words were : give me head 1.1618 0.05780 68 60 5 3
4370 I assume it will be a table for one, Madam? 1.1618 0.05387 68 59 7 2
4371 I have been praying for a meal like this. 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
4372 Your husband, Madam. Compliments of the Chef. 1.1618 0.04499 68 57 11 0
4373 And to think, I loved her once… 1.1618 0.04499 68 57 11 0
4374 The usual,maam 1.1618 0.05387 68 59 7 2
4375 Last time he’ll be head of the table making me pray. 1.1618 0.05387 68 59 7 2
4376 See, I told you I was meeting my husband here. 1.1618 0.06148 68 61 3 4
4377 i always appear bigger in the mirror 1.1618 0.05387 68 59 7 2
4378 Its anti shadwing 1.1618 0.05387 68 59 7 2
4379 It’s grass feed if that’s what’s worrying you 1.1618 0.04963 68 58 9 1
4380 He died happy. 1.1618 0.04499 68 57 11 0
4381 Your ex’s head on a platter, sir. 1.1613 0.04402 93 80 11 2
4382 He deserved it, for praying! 1.1613 0.04402 93 80 11 2
4383 It is very close to what you can prepare at home. Minus the courtship. 1.1613 0.04709 62 52 10 0
4384 We have his mother’s head fresh for dessert. 1.1613 0.04128 93 79 13 1
4385 I ordered torso 1.1613 0.05723 62 54 6 2
4386 Our chef hopes you like his new recipe, as much as you did last year’s. 1.1613 0.04128 93 79 13 1
4387 They’re called breasts and we all have them. 1.1613 0.04128 93 79 13 1
4388 There’s been a mistake. That’s not my husband. 1.1609 0.05137 87 77 6 4
4389 Your old roommate, medium rare. 1.1609 0.04588 87 75 10 2
4390 It only looks funny but tastes nothing like chicken 1.1609 0.03962 87 73 14 0
4391 Oh Henry I didn’t really mean it. Can we have a do over? 1.1609 0.04870 87 76 8 3
4392 My compliments to the chef. 1.1609 0.04286 87 74 12 1
4393 He was half-baked when I hooked up with him so I do hope he is well done for this occasion. 1.1609 0.04870 87 76 8 3
4394 Leftovers are the bane of my existence. 1.1609 0.05391 87 78 4 5
4395 Ohhh, swipe right! 1.1609 0.04588 87 75 10 2
4396 Take it back please. It still seems rare. 1.1609 0.04870 87 76 8 3
4397 You know they say that when you are eating out you should order something you can’t get at home. 1.1609 0.04870 87 76 8 3
4398 The special is mate’s head in a garlic cream sauce with seasonal vegetables. 1.1607 0.04952 56 47 9 0
4399 Yes, we eat our young. The more progressive, creative, and brilliant they are with a great future, the tastier. 1.1605 0.04464 81 69 11 1
4400 No. I always eat them Rare! 1.1605 0.04464 81 69 11 1
4401 So good to see my ex- again. 1.1605 0.04797 81 70 9 2
4402 Oh that’s Ant Susan. She always did bug me. 1.1605 0.05109 81 71 7 3
4403 We call it ‘Salome on rye’. 1.1605 0.04797 81 70 9 2
4404 Give it a prayer and a good burial. 1.1605 0.04797 81 70 9 2
4405 What a relief. I thought he stood me up! 1.1605 0.05109 81 71 7 3
4406 El dente, as you requested. 1.1605 0.04464 81 69 11 1
4407 When the head waiter brought the entre’e surprise du jour to the table, the diner was left bug-eyed, and inquired, ‘Prey, what is this?” 1.1605 0.04464 81 69 11 1
4408 You know what they say, revenge is best served in a garlic butter sauce. 1.1605 0.04464 81 69 11 1
4409 Sorry for the wait, but we had to catch her before we ….you know. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
4410 I don’t think this is the one I ripped off.” 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
4411 Le entree.
Medium rare madam.
1.1600 0.05383 75 66 6 3
4412 There must be some mistake. I ordered Putin’s head on a platter. 1.1600 0.05383 75 66 6 3
4413 Perfect! Just how I like my dates, medium rare. 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
4414 The Chef’s compliments on your choice. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
4415 Sometimes, revenge is best served al dente. 1.1600 0.05383 75 66 6 3
4416 I was gonna chop my ex-wives head off anyway, but this is great! 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
4417 The last thing he said was he wanted you to have this meal on him. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
4418 The gentleman from table 2 would like to invite you. Unfortunately he’s gone already. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
4419 Next time you dine with us, please order ahead. 1.1600 0.05037 75 65 8 2
4420 I believe you’ve had tonight’s special, madame. 1.1600 0.04262 75 63 12 0
4421 Prepared especially for you, the Cannibalism Entrée. 1.1600 0.05383 75 66 6 3
4422 WE’VE SAVED YOU THE TROUBLE OF HAVING TO MATE WITH HIM. 1.1600 0.05383 75 66 6 3
4423 Might I recommend your exe’s thorax simmered in butter, white wine and garlic and served with mini-vegetables. It is served with a thimble of Far Niente Estate Napa Valley Chardonnay 2018. 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
4424 I’m pretty sure you said Ed not bread… 1.1600 0.04665 75 64 10 1
4425 Incriminating as it is, dinner is served. 1.1596 0.04088 94 80 13 1
4426 Man-tis looks delicious, but I pray you cooked it rare this time. 1.1594 0.04439 69 58 11 0
4427 This is so much healthier than smoking afterwards 1.1594 0.05700 69 61 5 3
4428 Is your Ex acceptable? 1.1594 0.05700 69 61 5 3
4429 Voilà. 1.1594 0.05313 69 60 7 2
4430 Sir,it comes with our signature “dalayed gratification” sauce. 1.1594 0.04896 69 59 9 1
4431 That’s a fellow female,I only eat males. 1.1594 0.04896 69 59 9 1
4432 Ordering ahead. 1.1591 0.04241 88 75 12 1
4433 As you asked… We’ll skip the appetizer and go right to the main course. 1.1591 0.04539 88 76 10 2
4434 This is what happens when you don’t pray. 1.1591 0.04818 88 77 8 3
4435 But I just had that for lunch 1.1591 0.04241 88 75 12 1
4436 That looks delicious, but first…a prayer. 1.1591 0.04241 88 75 12 1
4437 Ma’am, here’s hoping you haven’t bitten off more than you can chew 1.1591 0.04818 88 77 8 3
4438 Of course, Madam. All of our entrees are matrimonially sourced. 1.1591 0.04241 88 75 12 1
4439 He said he had a nice time and he’ll call you. 1.1591 0.04539 88 76 10 2
4440 Zees motherfuckairrrrrr! 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
4441 Our house specialty, Husband Sous-Vide. 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
4442 I asked for hors d’oeuvre…not her head. 1.1587 0.05637 63 55 6 2
4443 Husband’s Head On A Platter. 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
4444 I said I’d like to BE at the head of the table, not BRING the ant’s head to the table! 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
4445 I’m a praying mantis, not a preying mantis. 1.1587 0.05163 63 54 8 1
4446 The “living for another day” special 1.1585 0.04414 82 70 11 1
4447 It’s home grown. 1.1585 0.05050 82 72 7 3
4448 As you ordered, one Tinder date’s head braised in honeyed ginger with garlic lime sauce. 1.1585 0.04414 82 70 11 1
4449 She never looked that delicious when she was alive! 1.1585 0.04743 82 71 9 2
4450 Copulation was never all it was cracked up to be. 1.1585 0.04414 82 70 11 1
4451 He’ll never tell you to “Smile” again. 1.1585 0.04743 82 71 9 2
4452 But I ordered the claws. 1.1585 0.04414 82 70 11 1
4453 Auntie WAS special… 1.1585 0.05340 82 73 5 4
4454 Fresh from the fight. 1.1585 0.05050 82 72 7 3
4455 We discovered it was Transgender. Would you like a replacement? 1.1585 0.05050 82 72 7 3
4456 Compliments of the Chef 1.1585 0.04414 82 70 11 1
4457 But I hadn’t finished with him yet. 1.1585 0.04414 82 70 11 1
4458 He was awfully good – I hope he’s, well, done 1.1585 0.04414 82 70 11 1
4459 Who’s that? 1.1585 0.04743 82 71 9 2
4460 Just as you requested,madam. 1.1585 0.04743 82 71 9 2
4461 And grasshopper pie for dessert, I presume? 1.1585 0.04058 82 69 13 0
4462 How incredibly romantic of him. 1.1585 0.04743 82 71 9 2
4463 The chef suggests madam might like to pair a pinot grigio with the entree. 1.1585 0.04058 82 69 13 0
4464 Your landlord, sir. 1.1585 0.04414 82 70 11 1
4465 And here is your date for tonight! 1.1585 0.04743 82 71 9 2
4466 Your last lover with marinara sauce and eggs. 1.1584 0.04158 101 87 12 2
4467 Your mate medium rare, Ma’am.” 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
4468 May I suggest a cigarette afterwards? 1.1579 0.05316 76 67 6 3
4469 He already took care of dinner. Enjoy! 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
4470 My apologies,I thought you asked for betraying mantis. 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
4471 My beautiful ebony eyes. 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
4472 Hey hey…. Chef just figured “If I were a mantis I’d pray for myself!” 1.1579 0.05636 76 68 4 4
4473 I guess your wife won’t be joining us tonight! 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
4474 If you didn’t want me to dine here, you could have just said so. 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
4475 Here, Ms. Mantis, for dessert, leftovers of your gentleman friend. 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
4476 The pies de resistance at Chez Mantis Herodius 1.1579 0.04608 76 65 10 1
4477 They’re better fresh, but sometimes I like a change. 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
4478 My Prayers are answered! 1.1579 0.06522 57 51 3 3
4479 Thanks kindly. Do you have any plans this evening? 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
4480 I never kiss and tell. 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
4481 His head on a plate, sir, as you wished! 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
4482 Sorry, I’m not a Cannibal. 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
4483 Oh my darling, you’ve gone too far for my happiness. 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
4484 For the discerning predator. 1.1579 0.04211 76 64 12 0
4485 I ordered the main course, not the appetizer. 1.1579 0.04975 76 66 8 2
4486 I hope your request was not a figure of speech. 1.1573 0.03881 89 75 14 0
4487 Salome sent this 1.1573 0.04491 89 77 10 2
4488 I can see you’re rubbing your legs in anticipation for this. 1.1573 0.04197 89 76 12 1
4489 Alas poor Charlie, I knew him well 1.1573 0.04491 89 77 10 2
4490 Please send it back, I prefer my revenge served cold. 1.1573 0.04197 89 76 12 1
4491 Was it love at first site? 1.1573 0.04491 89 77 10 2
4492 The rewards of your sexual cannibalism, My Queen. 1.1573 0.04197 89 76 12 1
4493 Poor George, I knew him well. 1.1573 0.04491 89 77 10 2
4494 After good sex I always save the best for last. 1.1571 0.04381 70 59 11 0
4495 Compliments of Mother Nature 1.1571 0.04831 70 60 9 1
4496 Who is this, and what have you done with my late husband? 1.1571 0.05242 70 61 7 2
4497 Successful online dating. 1.1571 0.04381 70 59 11 0
4498 Ooohhh,swipe right. Swipe right! 1.1571 0.04381 70 59 11 0
4499 Today’s silver platter special, as requested. 1.1571 0.04381 70 59 11 0
4500 Let’s face it, things could be worse 1.1571 0.05242 70 61 7 2
4501 This isn’t really what I ordered, but…it’s fine. 1.1571 0.05242 70 61 7 2
4502 Your date is served,Mademoiselle Mantis. 1.1571 0.04831 70 60 9 1
4503 Insects are just as – if not more – nutritious than commonly consumed meats, such as beef. 1.1571 0.05242 70 61 7 2
4504 I pray you, ma’am, you find your “bad boy” as good plated as when you mated. 1.1571 0.04831 70 60 9 1
4505 So pleased to be able to serve you your mate in person once again! 1.1571 0.04831 70 60 9 1
4506 Alas poor Yorick, I knew him …. My gorge rims at it. 1.1569 0.04120 102 88 12 2
4507 Medium rare and well educated, just as you requested. 1.1566 0.04364 83 71 11 1
4508 Monsur Mantiss, Your prayers have been answered. 1.1566 0.04364 83 71 11 1
4509 Not until you say grace! 1.1566 0.04364 83 71 11 1
4510 Aunt Susan? 1.1566 0.04992 83 73 7 3
4511 Try it with the sauce, Madame. Good things really do come to those who pray. 1.1566 0.04992 83 73 7 3
4512 The chef prefers serving revenge closer to medium rare. 1.1566 0.04364 83 71 11 1
4513 These dates with my husband always manage to make me feel so alive. 1.1566 0.04992 83 73 7 3
4514 He mated fresh less than a hour ago. 1.1566 0.04992 83 73 7 3
4515 Here’s hoping this isn’t my late cousin, who recently died from a accidental shovel injury 1.1566 0.04014 83 70 13 0
4516 Oh my god, that’s someone else’s husband! 1.1566 0.04364 83 71 11 1
4517 We recommend you enjoy this one family-style. 1.1566 0.04689 83 72 9 2
4518 Would you care for some fresh larva? 1.1566 0.04014 83 70 13 0
4519 I am sure you now must have every reason to smile. 1.1566 0.04992 83 73 7 3
4520 The Bordeaux again… mademoiselle? 1.1566 0.04364 83 71 11 1
4521 I’ve been really looking foward to having mother for dinner. 1.1562 0.05088 64 55 8 1
4522 as you wished, madam. your mate, steamy, with no glutimate. 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
4523 As you requested, madam, your first course is baked stuffed mantis baby daddy head! 1.1562 0.04575 64 54 10 0
4524 This plant-based meal looks very believable 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
4525 ‘Not just your partner, but also a great source of protein.” 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
4526 Poached Baby Daddy, Madame. 1.1558 0.05250 77 68 6 3
4527 My lover didn’t understand me when I said, “if you don’t have a seat at the table, you’re probably on the menu.” 1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
4528 If I’m having steamed face, can it be someone else’s? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
4529 I told him, “Beware the Ides of March!”
Is that a smile I see? Looks like he got
what he was after, and then some!
1.1558 0.04914 77 67 8 2
4530 Sir, you ordered to have his head on a platter? 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
4531 Khartoum Khartoum 1.1558 0.05865 77 70 2 5
4532 Baked Mate de Jour as you ordered madam. 1.1558 0.04161 77 65 12 0
4533 So disappointing! I wanted to mate with him first. 1.1558 0.04553 77 66 10 1
4534 I also plan on eating the placenta following the birth. 1.1556 0.04444 90 78 10 2
4535 Best sex ever 1.1556 0.04444 90 78 10 2
4536 My lawyer really meant business! 1.1556 0.04154 90 77 12 1
4537 New sauce, different spices. The chef hopes you’ll
welcome this change from your previous 337 husbands.
1.1556 0.03842 90 76 14 0
4538 Madam the gentleman said he would like to surprise you with a nice dinner in return for last night’s ravishment. 1.1556 0.04154 90 77 12 1
4539 I only hope it was as good for him as it was for you, Madam. 1.1556 0.04444 90 78 10 2
4540 Your tête-à-tête Marseillaise, madam. 1.1553 0.04083 103 89 12 2
4541 Isn’t that best served cold? 1.1553 0.04310 103 90 10 3
4542 The enemy of my enemy is my friend. 1.1549 0.05172 71 62 7 2
4543 I understand that you two are celebrating an important occasion. 1.1549 0.04325 71 60 11 0
4544 This will give you a head start 1.1549 0.04767 71 61 9 1
4545 Just like mama used to make. 1.1549 0.04767 71 61 9 1
4546 Maybe next time I’ll let him pick the restaurant 1.1549 0.04767 71 61 9 1
4547 Sorry…I ordered him raw. 1.1549 0.04767 71 61 9 1
4548 Our kitchen is working ahead of schedule today. 1.1549 0.04767 71 61 9 1
4549 Ms. Mantis was pleased that her husband could join her for dinner. 1.1549 0.04767 71 61 9 1
4550 With the compliments of the exterminator…. 1.1549 0.04767 71 61 9 1
4551 It was a mating dispute. 1.1549 0.04325 71 60 11 0
4552 He didn’t look like his profile picture 1.1549 0.04325 71 60 11 0
4553 After all, it’s a dog eat dog world . 1.1549 0.04767 71 61 9 1
4554 In old days, we smoked after sex. 1.1549 0.05548 71 63 5 3
4555 Yeah, I know, a tad gory for the New Yorker. 1.1548 0.04316 84 72 11 1
4556 Your ordered enemy-competition, sir” 1.1548 0.04936 84 74 7 3
4557 I told him I was about to pray before my meal; that should have clued him in. 1.1548 0.04936 84 74 7 3
4558 I believe that you were the one who said, “Off with his…” 1.1548 0.04936 84 74 7 3
4559 As you like it… rare. 1.1548 0.04936 84 74 7 3
4560 Your husband is stewing in the kitchen. 1.1548 0.04637 84 73 9 2
4561 And for dessert, we’ll be serving your mother in law. 1.1548 0.04316 84 72 11 1
4562 Are you sure? It doesn’t look like John the Baptist 1.1548 0.04637 84 73 9 2
4563 Happy Mating Memories, Madam. 1.1548 0.03970 84 71 13 0
4564 At least it’s no one I know 1.1548 0.03970 84 71 13 0
4565 Perfect. But first, I was raised always to pray before I prey. 1.1548 0.04637 84 73 9 2
4566 And my compliments to your divorce lawyers. 1.1548 0.04936 84 74 7 3
4567 Our ‘special of the day’, preserved ancestry. 1.1548 0.04936 84 74 7 3
4568 do i know you? 1.1546 0.04479 97 85 9 3
4569 If it helps, think of it as a savory entree, not a former lover. 1.1538 0.04855 78 68 8 2
4570 That’s Ray! 1.1538 0.04668 91 80 8 3
4571 Are you familiar with this new delicacy? 1.1538 0.03764 117 101 14 2
4572 I’m just your server. Please don’t bite my head off! 1.1538 0.05473 65 57 6 2
4573 I’m famished. I can’t wait to get toward his toes. 1.1538 0.05015 65 56 8 1
4574 Umm, I believe I ordered him rare…raring to go..last night! 1.1538 0.04399 91 79 10 2
4575 Now do you understand why it’s so important to pray before each meal? 1.1538 0.04510 65 55 10 0
4576 Your Poached Partner, Madam. 1.1538 0.04855 78 68 8 2
4577 Here’s your husband’s head. Are you happy now? 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
4578 He’ll be delicious if he’s as good as he was in bed!” 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
4579 He was never enough for me. 1.1538 0.04112 78 66 12 0
4580 How decapitating! 1.1538 0.04112 91 78 12 1
4581 It looks a little rare to me. 1.1538 0.05473 65 57 6 2
4582 As you requested,your mate’s head served on a platter. 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
4583 His last words were, “Anything else before I go?” 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
4584 SHE COULDN’T WAIT TO TRY THE “JOHN THE BAPTIST” PLATTER 1.1538 0.05186 78 69 6 3
4585 A side of Tobacco Juice, ma’am? 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
4586 I loved him then; I love him now. 1.1538 0.04112 78 66 12 0
4587 Yes, my wife is a picky eater,
but you didn’t have to bite her head off.
1.1538 0.04510 65 55 10 0
4588 Are you sure it’s not mine? 1.1538 0.04668 91 80 8 3
4589 I present foreplay ! 1.1538 0.04399 91 79 10 2
4590 I asked for his head on a pike! 1.1538 0.04668 91 80 8 3
4591 Your Baby Daddy Surprise’, mademoiselle. 1.1538 0.04399 91 79 10 2
4592 Sorry, the platter isn’t silver, but the head you demanded is real. 1.1538 0.04855 78 68 8 2
4593 Sir, eating insect protein is good for the planet. Besides, it is no one you knew. 1.1538 0.04510 65 55 10 0
4594 This is your late husband’s head. Enjoy! 1.1538 0.05015 65 56 8 1
4595 We killed this one in the kitchen, but one’s still missing. 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
4596 Would you ask the sommelier if he recommends red or white? 1.1538 0.04498 78 67 10 1
4597 Can I just get some ketchup? 1.1538 0.04510 65 55 10 0
4598 Just as you ordered Madam. Lover al la Carte. 1.1538 0.04855 78 68 8 2
4599 It’s Father’s Day! Enjoy it while it lasts. 1.1529 0.04881 85 75 7 3
4600 Wait. Don’t you know revenge is a dish best served cold? 1.1529 0.04269 85 73 11 1
4601 The results of your insecticide Madame 1.1529 0.03927 85 72 13 0
4602 Dinner a la mate 1.1529 0.04269 85 73 11 1
4603 Your husband’s head, au gratin, as you always like it. 1.1529 0.03927 85 72 13 0
4604 Madam, our”Ladies’ Night Special”. 1.1529 0.04269 85 73 11 1
4605 Our Friday special, bone-in Mantis cheeks for one 1.1529 0.04269 85 73 11 1
4606 Well done, as you wanted 1.1529 0.03927 85 72 13 0
4607 We offer self-service 1.1529 0.04585 85 74 9 2
4608 Here’s your husband, ma’am. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
4609 I hope madam likes the way we captured the smile on his face! 1.1528 0.05104 72 63 7 2
4610 Crock monsieur,madame! Buon appetite! 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
4611 Oh! Charlie.. . he was such a good husband. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
4612 I assume you’d like to say grace prior to dining? 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
4613 Where’s the ketchup? 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
4614 Patriarch, yum. 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
4615 To celebrate your kill,the chef prepared something special. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
4616 Tonight’s special: your ex-husband Ned. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
4617 Just as you ordered Mr. Dahmer 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
4618 I’ll be back when you’ve finished…your food. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
4619 My wife never smelled so good!! 1.1528 0.04270 72 61 11 0
4620 I hope you like him this way. 1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
4621 As they say, monsieur,
you are what you eat.
1.1528 0.04706 72 62 9 1
4622 Our menu is fresh, local and sustainable 1.1525 0.05304 59 51 7 1
4623 She’s never looked so delicious ! 1.1524 0.04010 105 91 12 2
4624 We held the pickles, as you requested, madam. 1.1522 0.04872 92 82 6 4
4625 Smokin’. Definitely how I remember him!” 1.1522 0.03765 92 78 14 0
4626 As you ordered, your ex on a platter 1.1519 0.04797 79 69 8 2
4627 You fool, surely you know the abdomen is the only part worth eating 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
4628 My good man, as served, the eyes are a distraction. Please rotate the plate 180 degrees. 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
4629 Congrats on the promotion! You are finally getting ahead! 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
4630 Hm. I beliece this dish is best served cold. 1.1519 0.04797 79 69 8 2
4631 ”OH so that’s where my date went, at least I’m still not gonna eat alone” 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
4632 Have no doubt, dear brother. I will be preying for you. 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
4633 Ah. my partner! Well done! 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
4634 Compliments of the frogs, with a reminder that noise making ends at 9:00 PM. 1.1519 0.04064 79 67 12 0
4635 Your dinner date has arrived, Madame. 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
4636 This requires some serious praying. 1.1519 0.04797 79 69 8 2
4637 I pray you will find him to your liking, my ladyship. 1.1519 0.04064 79 67 12 0
4638 May I present your main mate. 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
4639 …and will Ma’am be dining alone tonight? 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
4640 Are you sure you don’t have the same food allergies? 1.1519 0.04445 79 68 10 1
4641 When I asked if you served Vegan entrees…. 1.1515 0.04944 66 57 8 1
4642 And I thought MY divorce was messy. Bon appetit I guess! 1.1515 0.04944 66 57 8 1
4643 Before the parboil, your mate mentioned something about a wild night he enjoyed with you. 1.1515 0.05395 66 58 6 2
4644 Is this because he stole your heart away? 1.1515 0.04944 66 57 8 1
4645 He looks better than he did when we had sex. 1.1515 0.04944 66 57 8 1
4646 You have no idea how long I’ve waited to see this! 1.1515 0.04944 66 57 8 1
4647 Usually our customers fornicate after dinner” 1.1515 0.05395 66 58 6 2
4648 Preying you like this. 1.1515 0.04944 66 57 8 1
4649 Your Impossible Grasshopper,madame. 1.1515 0.04393 99 87 9 3
4650 After this appetizer, your main course will be shoulders followed by a dessert of knees and toes. 1.1515 0.04393 99 87 9 3
4651 Your entree is served, head of mate. 1.1512 0.04535 86 75 9 2
4652 Motherhood will prove to be the answer to all your prayers. 1.1512 0.04223 86 74 11 1
4653 Would you join me in a prayer? 1.1512 0.04827 86 76 7 3
4654 As head waiter, I ask if this is to your liking … pray tell ? 1.1512 0.03885 86 73 13 0
4655 Oh Henrietta I told you not to go out at night. Look what happened to you. 1.1512 0.03885 86 73 13 0
4656 Kafkaesque special Sir 1.1512 0.04223 86 74 11 1
4657 Perhaps I misunderstood his last request. 1.1512 0.04223 86 74 11 1
4658 Divine. 1.1509 0.05648 53 46 6 1
4659 I am glad I swiped right 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
4660 A case of putting the cart before the horse 1.1507 0.05744 73 66 3 4
4661 My husband finally showed up for dinner! 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
4662 It’s only good if its raw and just fresh from the body it was attached to, not baked- send it back.. 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
4663 He always wanted to be served first. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4664 Good Lord! I won’t get pregnant by a green-bag. 1.1507 0.04216 73 62 11 0
4665 Much tastier than devouring your young. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4666 Uncle Dave! Send him back!! 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4667 I hope your husband’s decapitation was as good for him as it was for you. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4668 The chef took the liberty of preparing your usual post-coital dish. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4669 The narcissist special for your enjoyment. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4670 I ordered the tail not the head. 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
4671 This is from the lady at the bar. She’s super into you. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4672 Your ex husband will be joining you for dinner. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4673 Here is your wine, and this is from the gentleman at the end of the bar. 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
4674 I was praying for a good dinner, I guess I got too far a-head of myself! 1.1507 0.05403 73 65 5 3
4675 Are you sure that is mine? I always thought he seemed larger than life. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4676 Oh dear…I was afraid she might have taken a wrong turn on her way to the ladies’ room… 1.1507 0.05038 73 64 7 2
4677 Word on the street is you should watch your back. 1.1507 0.04645 73 63 9 1
4678 Ex-wife: Saving the best for last! 1.1505 0.04030 93 80 12 1
4679 Just like you make at home! 1.1505 0.04310 93 81 10 2
4680 Here’s your Valentine’s Day special dinner. 1.1505 0.04573 93 82 8 3
4681 Now may I present what we think you will agree was the best of your husbands. 1.1505 0.04030 93 80 12 1
4682 Look, a companion for dining is one thing… but this! 1.1500 0.04740 80 70 8 2
4683 Your Garcia Alfredo, Signora 1.1500 0.04017 80 68 12 0
4684 Your Valentine meal is served. 1.1500 0.04017 80 68 12 0
4685 For you Madam! First the sex, now the treat!” 1.1500 0.04017 80 68 12 0
4686 Gregor! 1.1500 0.04740 80 70 8 2
4687 Anyone you know? 1.1500 0.05366 80 72 4 4
4688 Oui Madame, votre Tête du Paramour!

Bon Appétit!

1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
4689 We should have skipped the oysters. 1.1500 0.04740 80 70 8 2
4690 As ordered, your Ex’s head on a platter “ 1.1500 0.04394 80 69 10 1
4691 Nice, it has a garnish of fava beans 1.1500 0.04394 80 69 10 1
4692 Your last hook-up, Mademoiselle. Medium rare, as requested. 1.1500 0.04740 80 70 8 2
4693 He asked that you pray for him… 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
4694 Love at first sight. 1.1500 0.05221 60 52 7 1
4695 Here you are, madam. Enjoy your smoked mate. 1.1500 0.04394 80 69 10 1
4696 definitely the best looking mate i’ve had; bet he’s the best tasting, too. 1.1500 0.04394 80 69 10 1
4697 We call it “insect husbandry.” 1.1500 0.04394 80 69 10 1
4698 Freshly bitten, madam. 1.1500 0.04394 80 69 10 1
4699 My dearest Yorick, sharing this fine Mantischevitz with you fills me with butterflies! 1.1500 0.04394 80 69 10 1
4700 I prey this is sufficient. 1.1500 0.04740 80 70 8 2
4701 You may or may not have gotten the last one. 1.1500 0.04740 80 70 8 2
4702 Forget it, I’m not a cannibal 1.1500 0.04017 80 68 12 0
4703 Take it back! I need a cigarette, first… 1.1500 0.05063 80 71 6 3
4704 Hop diggity! You were able to bring me the head of Alfredo, Garcon! 1.1500 0.04740 80 70 8 2
4705 My husband suggested I go on a keto diet. 1.1500 0.04649 60 51 9 0
4706 Our female diners find this especially satisfying after just one bite. 1.1500 0.05063 80 71 6 3
4707 He said that you were the answer to his Mantis Prayer. 1.1495 0.03710 107 92 14 1
4708 Perhaps that’s why he’s gone 1.1494 0.04486 87 76 9 2
4709 That seems a little rude. 1.1494 0.04178 87 75 11 1
4710 Farm to table madam, as you wish. 1.1494 0.05047 87 78 5 4
4711 Looks perfect! I’ll be dining alone. 1.1494 0.05047 87 78 5 4
4712 Tonight’s special: Gregor Samsa 1.1494 0.04178 87 75 11 1
4713 Let me know when you’re ready for dessert. I’ll retrieve it from the backseat of your car. 1.1494 0.04486 87 76 9 2
4714 … and the wine pairing is a Cote du Clone. 1.1494 0.04178 87 75 11 1
4715 I need a napkin and perhaps a bib. 1.1494 0.04775 87 77 7 3
4716 My dear, you’ve never looked so ravishing! 1.1494 0.04178 87 75 11 1
4717 The chef says ‘Well done!’ to each of you. 1.1494 0.04486 87 76 9 2
4718 No no no… I told you I wanted red ant 1.1494 0.04486 87 76 9 2
4719 Finally, it’s all the rage. 1.1494 0.04486 87 76 9 2
4720 Would you like any Grey Poupon? 1.1493 0.04875 67 58 8 1
4721 If you loved him before, now you’ll love him even more. 1.1493 0.05728 67 60 4 3
4722 Oh! I had that for dinner yesterday. 1.1493 0.04386 67 57 10 0
4723 Mr. Bezos, your entree. 1.1493 0.04875 67 58 8 1
4724 What so you take me for, a cannibug? 1.1493 0.04875 67 58 8 1
4725 normally we only serve this ala carte, but in your case we’ll make an exception 1.1493 0.04386 67 57 10 0
4726 His last words were, “Better to have loved and have lost (my head) than to have lived as an incel.” 1.1493 0.04875 67 58 8 1
4727 Your third date, I presume? 1.1493 0.05728 67 60 4 3
4728 Well I’ll be damned! My cousin Gertrude. 1.1493 0.04386 67 57 10 0
4729 With the vegetables and glass of wine,you will surely find it to be a very satisfying meal,indeed. 1.1493 0.04386 67 57 10 0
4730 Well, okay, I guess. They say you are what you eat. 1.1489 0.03692 94 80 14 0
4731 Your mate, my liege. 1.1489 0.03990 94 81 12 1
4732 The chef mentioned the prep was mere seconds. 1.1489 0.03692 94 80 14 0
4733 Voila! Your date is your mate on a plate. Isn’t it great? 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
4734 A grasshopper, Yorick! I knew him, Horatio. 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
4735 This of course is a male head. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4736 Mantidae aux pommes de terre, Monsieur. And you disgust me. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4737 COME WITH A SIDE ORDER OF SORBITOL. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4738 What were you expecting when our sign clearly says :
Minimum charge is $20 per head.
1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4739 That’s the entree for the SECOND date! 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4740 I’ll dig in after I say grace.” 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4741 Oh, fuck! 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4742 I think we know what it DOESN’T pair well with. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4743 An amuse bouche from our chef. 1.1486 0.04974 74 65 7 2
4744 But you see Mrs. Mantis, he’s still smiling! 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4745 sister soup 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4746 I told him not to get aHEAD of himself 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4747 Hope I didn’t scare her off 1.1486 0.05670 74 67 3 4
4748 Madame. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4749 It’s so sweet he picked a nice restaurant to propose to me. 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
4750 I agree, madame; he does bring to mind John the Baptist.” 1.1486 0.05333 74 66 5 3
4751 It’s better than sex 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4752 Charles, how could you? 1.1486 0.04164 74 63 11 0
4753 I just killed my mate because he didn’t have a brain in his head, and now he expects me to eat it? I’m paying for a meal with substance, not to waste my time looking for something that doesn’t exist. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4754 I sure hope dessert will be better than the main course. 1.1486 0.04587 74 64 9 1
4755 Madam, your husband, medium well. 1.1481 0.04343 81 70 10 1
4756 IVF is all of the romance with none of the mess! 1.1481 0.04343 81 70 10 1
4757 2022 Mug Modern 1.1481 0.05003 81 72 6 3
4758 Madam, I believe you’ll find this to be the answer to your prayers. 1.1481 0.04343 81 70 10 1
4759 I’m sorry. I ordered a Sagittarius! 1.1481 0.05003 81 72 6 3
4760 You skipped the most important step! 1.1481 0.03972 81 69 12 0
4761 Served on a platter, as requested. 1.1481 0.04685 81 71 8 2
4762 I did tell him I wasn’t in the mood. 1.1481 0.04343 81 70 10 1
4763 I was wondering where my husband went 1.1481 0.04685 81 71 8 2
4764 Voila! Your hubby soaked in beetle juice, just as you preyed for. 1.1481 0.04685 81 71 8 2
4765 I said I was bringing my wife to dinner, I didn’t say I wanted my wife for dinner. 1.1481 0.03972 81 69 12 0
4766 Waiter, can you lean in just a little closer so I can see better…. 1.1481 0.04685 81 71 8 2
4767 Relax, it’s no one you know. 1.1481 0.04685 81 71 8 2
4768 This is unacceptable, I’m going to need a Merlot 1.1481 0.04685 81 71 8 2
4769 Not exactly the head of John the Baptist, but. . . 1.1481 0.05003 81 72 6 3
4770 Antivaxer Cafe 1.1481 0.03972 81 69 12 0
4771 Prepared exactly to your specifications Mr. Lecter and might I add your marrying of the anthropopathic and anthropophagic is positively Nobelian in its brilliance. 1.1481 0.05003 81 72 6 3
4772 Madame, Braise Amoureux with sautéed Spring Fiddleheads and Ramps. 1.1481 0.03972 81 69 12 0
4773 He had many lovers, madame. 1.1481 0.04343 81 70 10 1
4774 What should it pair with? 1.1477 0.04133 88 76 11 1
4775 Madam, piping hot husband 1.1477 0.04438 88 77 9 2
4776 I’ll put the rest in a doggie bag. 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
4777 I ordered curried cicada. You’re ahead of yourself! 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
4778 Ah, the appetizer……can hardly wait for the rest! 1.1475 0.04578 61 52 9 0
4779 Meatloaf again? 1.1475 0.05141 61 53 7 1
4780 Heads, you win. 1.1474 0.03951 95 82 12 1
4781 I’m not surprised. He was a poor tipper.”
“My brother Jerry was never a good tipper.”
“Alas, he was never a good tipper.”
“I told him he shoulkd tip more.”
1.1474 0.03951 95 82 12 1
4782 Your repast for one 1.1474 0.03656 95 81 14 0
4783 Pour la veuve, tête de mante après le sexe. 1.1471 0.04807 68 59 8 1
4784 The price of your meal has just tripled. The Party has told us it is Putin’s fault. Believe only what the Party says is true. 1.1471 0.04327 68 58 10 0
4785 Here we have the recovered grilled head of your mate. Enjoy! 1.1471 0.04807 68 59 8 1
4786 If it’s overcooked, don’t bite my head off. 1.1471 0.04807 68 59 8 1
4787 It’s a “ dog eat dog “ world, Monsieur. 1.1471 0.04807 68 59 8 1
4788 Your wedding banquet appetizer, Madame Mantis!
Corps de Monsieur Mantis will be served next. Bon appétit!
1.1471 0.04327 68 58 10 0
4789 Thorax and abdomen are separate courses. 1.1471 0.04807 68 59 8 1
4790 Your date as requested. 1.1471 0.05244 68 60 6 2
4791 Oh my! He’s smaller than I remember! 1.1471 0.04807 68 59 8 1
4792 My favorite place for a dinner date and they have a great head waiter. 1.1471 0.04327 68 58 10 0
4793 He was a good man. 1.1467 0.04530 75 65 9 1
4794 Your wife, er, dinner sir. 1.1467 0.04911 75 66 7 2
4795 No! It was supposed to be after dinner and a movie! 1.1467 0.04530 75 65 9 1
4796 He said you were praying, I said you were preying. 1.1467 0.04113 75 64 11 0
4797 Steamed head of husband….medium rare. 1.1467 0.04911 75 66 7 2
4798 Our signature dish madam: Head of your hot mate on a plate 1.1467 0.04911 75 66 7 2
4799 I see you are celebrating your celebrating your divorce in style. 1.1467 0.04911 75 66 7 2
4800 Rare, just as you requested. 1.1467 0.04530 75 65 9 1
4801 I recommend a non-alcoholic wine pairing since you are obviously expecting. 1.1467 0.04530 75 65 9 1
4802 He was my neighbor’s husband. Do you have any others? 1.1467 0.04911 75 66 7 2
4803 The sex was great, but this is even moe well-done. 1.1467 0.04530 75 65 9 1
4804 Welcome to Baptiste; I’m your server, Salome. 1.1467 0.04911 75 66 7 2
4805 Oh, what I meant was, I want to eat AHEAD of my
brother.
1.1467 0.04911 75 66 7 2
4806 I pray this is as you desired? Putin on a plate! 1.1467 0.04530 75 65 9 1
4807 But I am a vegetarian. 1.1467 0.04911 75 66 7 2
4808 Is that my brother no please it can’t be it is noooooo I can’t eat this 1.1467 0.04911 75 66 7 2
4809 I pray this is satisfactory, madam. 1.1463 0.04945 82 73 6 3
4810 Madame, Dr. Lauersen’s nurse called- the heptacontuplets are thriving and he has agreed to write letters of recommendation for City and Country. 1.1463 0.04631 82 72 8 2
4811 Pray tell, what have we here? 1.1463 0.04631 82 72 8 2
4812 Perfect! 1.1463 0.04945 82 73 6 3
4813 Terribly sorry, but I thought the prep mentioned he was filet. 1.1463 0.04293 82 71 10 1
4814 Is he sautéed like my first one? 1.1463 0.04293 82 71 10 1
4815 He was always a hothead if everything wasn’t served to him on a silver platter. 1.1463 0.03927 82 70 12 0
4816 I suggest praying to get a-head 1.1463 0.04631 82 72 8 2
4817 The guy with whom you just mated. Bon appetit. 1.1463 0.03927 82 70 12 0
4818 And this is what happens when you morph from ‘Praying Mantis’ to Preying Mantis.’ 1.1463 0.04293 82 71 10 1
4819 I realize now I should never have asked for the head waiter. 1.1463 0.04293 82 71 10 1
4820 Yep, that’s my latest husband. Hot and steamy, just like the others. 1.1463 0.04293 82 71 10 1
4821 As always, the chef really knows my love language. 1.1463 0.03927 82 70 12 0
4822 Would you like that in a Doggie bag to go? 1.1463 0.04293 82 71 10 1
4823 La tete mari avec pommes de terre”, Madame 1.1463 0.04293 82 71 10 1
4824 He put up something of a struggle, but I think we can put together a doggy bag for the rest if you want. 1.1463 0.04293 82 71 10 1
4825 Under the circumstances, is it bad form to say grace? 1.1463 0.03927 82 70 12 0
4826 Your last suitor Miss Mantis,just the way you like him. 1.1461 0.04090 89 77 11 1
4827 I said ‘Alfredo Garcia’! 1.1461 0.04391 89 78 9 2
4828 To the victor belongs the spoils. 1.1461 0.04090 89 77 11 1
4829 Yorick???? 1.1461 0.04391 89 78 9 2
4830 No, I’ll be dining alone 1.1461 0.04090 89 77 11 1
4831 As requested, we’ve put his body in a to-go box. 1.1461 0.04391 89 78 9 2
4832 Now that’s what I call serving a head on a platter
1.1461 0.04391 89 78 9 2
4833 Voici, le Valentine’s Day spécial. 1.1461 0.04391 89 78 9 2
4834 Now I suppose he’ll never call. 1.1461 0.04391 89 78 9 2
4835 ”And for the climax Madam 1.1455 0.04798 55 47 8 0
4836 That fragrace! Chef has such a wonderful way with spouse heads! 1.1452 0.05063 62 54 7 1
4837 He should have listened. I always told him I’d never go vegetarian! 1.1452 0.05063 62 54 7 1
4838 Are you happy with the cuisson? 1.1452 0.05560 62 55 5 2
4839 My husband always comes to dinner steaming. 1.1452 0.05560 62 55 5 2
4840 Your ex, steamed as requested. Enjoy. 1.1449 0.04269 69 59 10 0
4841 Your roasted deja vu sir! 1.1449 0.04269 69 59 10 0
4842 Madame, your postcoital dinner is served. 1.1449 0.04269 69 59 10 0
4843 I going to remember him for his brain not his beauty. 1.1449 0.04269 69 59 10 0
4844 Our complimentary DNA testing shows you’re not related. Dig in. 1.1449 0.04269 69 59 10 0
4845 Ummm, a culinary selfie. 1.1449 0.05172 69 61 6 2
4846 The eyes are often bigger than the stomach. 1.1449 0.05172 69 61 6 2
4847 Your Dish of the Day. 1.1447 0.05199 76 68 5 3
4848 The fava beans really make this dish! 1.1447 0.04474 76 66 9 1
4849 The chef has out done himself, this looks like a relative. 1.1447 0.04474 76 66 9 1
4850 Hmm, I was really hoping it would be a bit more rare 1.1447 0.04474 76 66 9 1
4851 He thought it best for him to be steamed. 1.1447 0.04474 76 66 9 1
4852 Thank you so much. What I remember most fondly of my late husband was that he had such a good head on his shoulders! 1.1447 0.04474 76 66 9 1
4853 We made him a meal he couldn’t resist. 1.1447 0.04474 76 66 9 1
4854 He always a hothead. 1.1447 0.04063 76 65 11 0
4855 Not for everyday, of course. Just a special occasion indulgence. 1.1447 0.04474 76 66 9 1
4856 Shows we all contribute to civilization in one
way or another.
1.1447 0.04063 76 65 11 0
4857 Oh Dear, I think I’m having my wife as my main course. She looks very tasty 1.1447 0.04850 76 67 7 2
4858 Ooooh! Looks and smells just like Mom use to make! 1.1447 0.04474 76 66 9 1
4859 Un visage familier, mademoiselle? 1.1447 0.04850 76 67 7 2
4860 Honey you really look delicious. 1.1447 0.04063 76 65 11 0
4861 Ah, my husband. 1.1447 0.04063 76 65 11 0
4862 Your non-praying mantis, madam! 1.1447 0.04850 76 67 7 2
4863 Bon Appetit, Madame. So happy we could make
your husband’s head more palatable.
1.1446 0.04578 83 73 8 2
4864 Aren’t we supposed to kiss first. .. ? 1.1446 0.04889 83 74 6 3
4865 Very pragmatic, ordering ahead of your date. 1.1446 0.04245 83 72 10 1
4866 Why, it’s my EX! 1.1446 0.04245 83 72 10 1
4867 Madam,your lover’s head served “tartare” as requested! 1.1446 0.04578 83 73 8 2
4868 It’s Uncle Bill! 1.1446 0.04578 83 73 8 2
4869 To compliment your selection, may we recommend a drink with your name,
Mister Manhatten?
1.1446 0.04245 83 72 10 1
4870 Pommes frites with cannibalized head. Bon appetite. 1.1446 0.04578 83 73 8 2
4871 Doris! I was wondering where you went! 1.1446 0.04578 83 73 8 2
4872 Madame, tete de mari mante religieuse au vin. 1.1446 0.04245 83 72 10 1
4873 I thought I ordered the tail? 1.1444 0.04345 90 79 9 2
4874 Madam, from your last Tinder date. 1.1444 0.04345 90 79 9 2
4875 Dinner is early ma’am. While his dating profile said he was six inches it turns out he was only four. 1.1444 0.04048 90 78 11 1
4876 Among the hustle and bustle, we are all trying to get a head. 1.1444 0.04048 90 78 11 1
4877 So devoted! Got through Genesis,but not Exodus! 1.1444 0.04048 90 78 11 1
4878 Care to self-endulge? 1.1444 0.04345 90 79 9 2
4879 Gosh! What would Charles think of this? 1.1444 0.04048 90 78 11 1
4880 He asked you look after the children. 1.1443 0.03587 97 83 14 0
4881 Your friend has arrived for lunch. 1.1429 0.04527 84 74 8 2
4882 Your prayers are answered. 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4883 He’s too cooked for my liking. 1.1429 0.04527 84 74 8 2
4884 It’s been a cheat day for us both 1.1429 0.04790 77 68 7 2
4885 Your husband, enjoy. 1.1429 0.04213 70 60 10 0
4886 I’ve been praying for this. 1.1429 0.05102 70 62 6 2
4887 …and on a silver platter, Madam. 1.1429 0.04213 70 60 10 0
4888 I want his head on a plate 1.1429 0.04833 84 75 6 3
4889 No offense intended… her brains will meld with yours beautifully! 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4890 I told him I’d see his head on a platter if he saw other women. 1.1429 0.04790 77 68 7 2
4891 Haven’t you heard “revenge is a dish best served cold”? 1.1429 0.04213 70 60 10 0
4892 Miss, perhaps your next Tinder date could be somewhere less, uh, refined. Bon Apetit! 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4893 The only good mate…is roasted to perfection. Amen 1.1429 0.05102 70 62 6 2
4894 I’m going to need the rest of that bottle. 1.1429 0.04213 70 60 10 0
4895 Tete du traitre,prepared to perfection,as you requested Mademoiselle . 1.1429 0.05135 77 69 5 3
4896 The entree looks excellent, monsieur. And how flattering, to be served by the head waiter. 1.1429 0.04527 84 74 8 2
4897 I hope it is to Madam Salome’s liking. 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4898 We find many our best customers enjoy the heads of other’s husbands as much as they enjoyed their own. 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4899 The gentleman at the end of the bar sends his compliments and a appetizer. 1.1429 0.04014 77 66 11 0
4900 You didn’t mention anything about the eyes open or shut. 1.1429 0.05102 70 62 6 2
4901 Serves him right for eating my other four legs 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4902 Voila! He broke your heart. You prayed for revenge.
Your prayer is answered.
1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4903 Calvin’s head braised in an herb-infused reduction of your spittle with potatoes Lyonnaise 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4904 Is he local?”
“Oh yes, from the park just down the street!
1.1429 0.04790 77 68 7 2
4905 Oh, yuck, that’s my brother! I can’t eat that. 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4906 Her prayers came true! 1.1429 0.03841 84 72 12 0
4907 I’ll miss him. He was such a great provider. 1.1429 0.05102 70 62 6 2
4908 Your date hopes you enjoyed it as much as he did. 1.1429 0.04527 84 74 8 2
4909 Ants aren’t that literal 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4910 Best of all – I won’t be dining alone! 1.1429 0.04198 84 73 10 1
4911 And yet, he persisted, madam… 1.1429 0.04527 84 74 8 2
4912 This should see you through to the next course, ma’m. 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4913 Congratulations, she was a perfect specimen. 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4914 Mr. Putin’s head on a platter,as requested. 1.1429 0.05102 70 62 6 2
4915 As requested, your partners head on a silver platter 1.1429 0.04014 77 66 11 0
4916 Mais oui monsieur it does look like a mini you 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4917 Lust to lust, Ma’ma. 1.1429 0.05102 70 62 6 2
4918 Wonderful Pierre! I’m having one of my ex-husbands for dinner. 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4919 I just lost my appetite, 1.1429 0.04006 91 79 11 1
4920 On a platter, boss. Just as you requested. 1.1429 0.04198 84 73 10 1
4921 My first husband never looked better! 1.1429 0.04213 70 60 10 0
4922 Nothing But the Best 1.1429 0.04014 77 66 11 0
4923 Your husband actually wanted you to know he could make it for dinner. 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4924 You were right ma’am. He was very hard-headed. 1.1429 0.04790 77 68 7 2
4925 Would it be possible to get a table by the garbage? 1.1429 0.04790 77 68 7 2
4926 I loved his body too 1.1429 0.04987 63 55 7 1
4927 I’m the lean and hungry type, and only come out at night 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4928 « Sir, your Marie-Antoinette! » 1.1429 0.05476 63 56 5 2
4929 Any chance you can put it on a silver platter for me? 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4930 Do bring the ketchup. 1.1429 0.03841 84 72 12 0
4931 this is a cooking show competition! I said bring me YOU on a plate to win it 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4932 I’d say another eight minutes at 375 degrees. 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4933 You overcooked my former boyfriend. 1.1429 0.04527 84 74 8 2
4934 We offer all our cannibals a headstart. 1.1429 0.05493 70 63 4 3
4935 That’s not what I meant when I told you to think ahead. 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4936 Compliments of our head chef, the answer to your culinary prayers. 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4937 Compliments of the table over there. They’re a new vaudeville act and they want you to join. They’re called..the Aristocrats 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4938 How to make the most of your date… 1.1429 0.04678 70 61 8 1
4939 No, it’s not your Auntie Jan. 1.1429 0.05102 70 62 6 2
4940 Would you like some ranch dressing on the side? 1.1429 0.04790 77 68 7 2
4941 Please have a bite. It tastes like chicken. 1.1429 0.04419 77 67 9 1
4942 Sir, you asked for your brother’s head on a platter… 1.1429 0.03841 84 72 12 0
4943 Ah, I can skip the sex. 1.1429 0.04014 77 66 11 0
4944 I asked for rare, not to be rare. 1.1415 0.03656 106 92 13 1
4945 I hope it’s as good as the other two this week. 1.1413 0.03965 92 80 11 1
4946 Seriously??? 1.1413 0.04528 92 82 7 3
4947 For main course ‘ Ahoy Mate!’ 1.1413 0.03965 92 80 11 1
4948 People say it’s better than sex. 1.1413 0.04528 92 82 7 3
4949 I present, your future. 1.1413 0.04256 92 81 9 2
4950 I loved him. 1.1413 0.04256 92 81 9 2
4951 She was bitter, but a nice butter sauce took care of that. 1.1413 0.03652 92 79 13 0
4952 Here’s Your Valentine’s Day Special, Milady. 1.1412 0.04152 85 74 10 1
4953 Served cold, as you requested, Madam. 1.1412 0.04476 85 75 8 2
4954 The classiest way to eat my husband. 1.1412 0.04476 85 75 8 2
4955 better him than me, right? 1.1412 0.04779 85 76 6 3
4956 Didn’t my brother recently hang around here? 1.1412 0.03799 85 73 12 0
4957 ‘As requested, madam, without broccoli.’ 1.1412 0.04152 85 74 10 1
4958 Your sister is served” 1.1412 0.03799 85 73 12 0
4959 I was wondering why she was late. 1.1412 0.04152 85 74 10 1
4960 Your order from the superfood menu for humans, enjoy! 1.1412 0.04476 85 75 8 2
4961 And a nice Chianti? 1.1410 0.03966 78 67 11 0
4962 Your mate wished to do something special for madam. 1.1410 0.04366 78 68 9 1
4963 Here is your head on a platter, Sir. 1.1410 0.04732 78 69 7 2
4964 Congratulations on your pregnancy.
I assume you will want to say grace before I serve him?
1.1410 0.04366 78 68 9 1
4965 Served on a bed of fescue as requested, Madame. 1.1410 0.03966 78 67 11 0
4966 He was so tender he doesnt even need the Hasselbacks 1.1410 0.04366 78 68 9 1
4967 Monsieur bien joué, Madame 1.1410 0.04366 78 68 9 1
4968 Revenge is best served hot. 1.1410 0.04366 78 68 9 1
4969 His last words, Madame, were ‘Here’s looking at you kid.’ 1.1410 0.03966 78 67 11 0
4970 In this case, Ma’m, ‘You give good head’ *is* socially correct. 1.1410 0.03966 78 67 11 0
4971 The best I’ve ever had x2. 1.1410 0.04366 78 68 9 1
4972 As the sign says, we serve French Royalty. 1.1410 0.04732 78 69 7 2
4973 Ta-da…an After-Trump Thanksgiving…Amen 1.1410 0.03966 78 67 11 0
4974 What’s ahead 1.1410 0.04366 78 68 9 1
4975 Is that my friend Manny? 1.1410 0.04366 78 68 9 1
4976 Ahh…dear Henry. His last words were “I don’t whether I’m coming or going”. 1.1410 0.04732 78 69 7 2
4977 If that is for dinner, what’s for dessert. 1.1410 0.05072 78 70 5 3
4978 What dessert do you suggest that will go along with it? 1.1410 0.04732 78 69 7 2
4979 Dad, is that you? 1.1410 0.04732 78 69 7 2
4980 No wonder he didn’t show up for dinner! 1.1410 0.04732 78 69 7 2
4981 I’m sorry but can I send this back? I said well-done, and well… I can see he’s still blinking at me. 1.1410 0.04366 78 68 9 1
4982 Your smoke meets with your satisfaction, Madame? 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
4983 Rare,as you prefer. 1.1408 0.05033 71 63 6 2
4984 And HERE’S your ex-husband soufflé! 1.1408 0.05418 71 64 4 3
4985 His last wish was that you would say Grace. 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
4986 As you requested, the house special 1.1408 0.04616 71 62 8 1
4987 And I didn’t even have to put out. 1.1408 0.05033 71 63 6 2
4988 Oh, my beloved hubby…what a waste alive, maybe some taste now 1.1406 0.04914 64 56 7 1
4989 Madam, I believe you will find this chef du compagnon quite to your liking. Braised in a beurre noisette and served with haricot verts, it’s one of our more popular dishes. Bon appetit. 1.1406 0.04380 64 55 9 0
4990 I see that my date is late,as always. 1.1406 0.04380 64 55 9 0
4991 Yes, that’s Olivia–and I did ask for her head on a silver platter, with Ritz crackers. So yes, I’ll enjoy, thank you. 1.1406 0.04914 64 56 7 1
4992 Your beau garni. 1.1406 0.05395 64 57 5 2
4993 The staff knew what was to happen upon observing Ms. Ditman on her third date with her latest, Alfred.

“Do we warn him?” “Pray that you don’t – she tips so generously.”
And, punctual as ever, she returned the next day for her traditional order.

1.1406 0.04914 64 56 7 1
4994 It’s our anniversary 1.1404 0.04642 57 49 8 0
4995 Please thank the chef for me. He was an Incel who finally got lucky. 1.1400 0.04269 100 89 8 3
4996 Pray tell madam,was it good for you? 1.1400 0.03766 100 87 12 1
4997 Mon ami, the chef here at “Je Ne Regrette Rien” cordially invites you to visit the kitchen after dinner. 1.1398 0.04481 93 83 7 3
4998 No sauce? 1.1395 0.04106 86 75 10 1
4999 Then, mademoiselle, for the main course after the wedding ceremony we will serve Le Groom Supris! 1.1395 0.03758 86 74 12 0
5000 I can assure you, your date pairs better with your wine than with you. 1.1395 0.03758 86 74 12 0
5001 Are you satisfied? 1.1395 0.04106 86 75 10 1
5002 Compliments from the head waiter.
Greg Mattingly
Orange, MA
1.1395 0.04106 86 75 10 1
5003 As you ordered, the head of your first husband boiled to perfection. 1.1395 0.04427 86 76 8 2
5004 Wonderful! Just as promised! 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5005 Your Mante Du Jour, Ms. Mantis. 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5006 Your lover is served. 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5007 Oh no, I thought I’d never have to see him again after last night! 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5008 Your date wandered too close to the kitchen. 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5009 *Crickets* 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5010 Aren’t you getting ahead of yourself? I thought sex was the main course. 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5011 I cooked your cousin nice just like you wanted Mr. Mantis 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5012 Do you have any fava beans or a nice Chianti? 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5013 Voilà, madame—le coup de foudre coup de grâce 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5014 The gentleman wants to thank you for last night. 1.1392 0.04675 79 70 7 2
5015 Tonights Special, “Love them than eat them” 1.1392 0.03920 79 68 11 0
5016 I see extinction in my future 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5017 Now for a little role reversal. And she said I only liked her for her body! 1.1392 0.04314 79 69 9 1
5018 Monsieur, here in ‘Pah-rhee’ this entree is called the Mantisette Antoinette – in America when served with Freedom Fries, it is the Donner Party Splatter Platter… 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
5019 My apologies, ma’am, the rest of him escaped. 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
5020 No. I ordered the agnostic mantis! 1.1389 0.04104 72 62 10 0
5021 Voila, Monsieur! Our specialty is “maim to table”. Bon Apetit! 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
5022 That’s not what I had in mind. 1.1389 0.05346 72 65 4 3
5023 For your dining pleasure,one order of St. John the Mantis. 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
5024 Is this the man you made love too. 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
5025 Straight from the humane slaughterhouse. 1.1389 0.04104 72 62 10 0
5026 Perfectly chilled to cold as requested. 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
5027 Hey man, tis not what I ordered 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
5028 Well sir, now you’ll know what all the fuss is about. 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
5029 I wonder how long before I’m on the platter! 1.1389 0.04556 72 63 8 1
5030 I guess you can eat memories. 1.1385 0.04317 65 56 9 0
5031 Would madam care for a Demi-glacé on your husband? 1.1385 0.04842 65 57 7 1
5032 The resemblance to my late Arthur is remarkable. 1.1385 0.04317 65 56 9 0
5033 The family that preys together stays together 1.1385 0.05315 65 58 5 2
5034 (By Charlie Hankin). “Who’s the weird looking one in the back?” 1.1383 0.03886 94 82 11 1
5035 Oh I couldn’t possibly, I’m already too full of myself. 1.1383 0.04170 94 83 9 2
5036 Don’t worry. This couldn’t have been your wife. She wasn’t wearing a wedding ring! 1.1383 0.04436 94 84 7 3
5037 Voila, Madame. We trust you’ll enjoy it even more than the sex. 1.1379 0.04062 87 76 10 1
5038 He lost his head after seeing the bill. 1.1379 0.04062 87 76 10 1
5039 I can’t believe how much that looks like my late husband. 1.1379 0.04379 87 77 8 2
5040 Alien cannibals are
much more sophisticated than the human savages
1.1379 0.04062 87 76 10 1
5041 Compliments of your former dinner partner who said to tell you that, “you are really hot!” 1.1379 0.03718 87 75 12 0
5042 Don’t feel too guilty about what you’ve ordered.
Our owner has made a generous contribution to Fight Sexual Cannibalism (www.fsc.net).
1.1379 0.04379 87 77 8 2
5043 Thank you Lord for the hot mating and the fiery meal. Amen! 1.1375 0.04950 80 72 5 3
5044 Nope, still too raw and beautiful! 1.1375 0.04263 80 70 9 1
5045 This is just the appetizer. 1.1375 0.04263 80 70 9 1
5046 ew bitch i heard u like rick & morty 1.1375 0.03875 80 69 11 0
5047 As ordered, one Salome Special. 1.1375 0.04263 80 70 9 1
5048 We call this dish “the Survivor’s Special. 1.1375 0.04950 80 72 5 3
5049 St. John the Mantis, Your Majesty! 1.1375 0.04263 80 70 9 1
5050 It would seem that your romantic evening is over. Good choice, appetizer is your mate’s head sautéed in a buttery cream sauce stuffed with chives and a garlic potato. 1.1375 0.03875 80 69 11 0
5051 Something about this bugs me. 1.1375 0.03875 80 69 11 0
5052 Your husband, Madam, served with new potatoes and honey 1.1375 0.04620 80 71 7 2
5053 Would Madam like to pair a wine with her entree? 1.1375 0.04263 80 70 9 1
5054 As your special order requested, madam, flambéed spouse head. 1.1375 0.03875 80 69 11 0
5055 Ah, my love. You look delicious. 1.1375 0.04620 80 71 7 2
5056 We are happy to serve your kind. 1.1375 0.04263 80 70 9 1
5057 Loos good! I never did like him when he was alive, now let’s see what he’s like now. 1.1375 0.04263 80 70 9 1
5058 He’s no good for you. 1.1375 0.04263 80 70 9 1
5059 I don’t think this is what my therapist meant when she told me I needed to accept myself for who I am. 1.1375 0.04263 80 70 9 1
5060 Now that was some roasting-hot love-making. 1.1370 0.04497 73 64 8 1
5061 Ah. You’ve seen the movie Fresh. 1.1370 0.04497 73 64 8 1
5062 Of course madam understands we must charge a small service fee for BYO boyfriend. 1.1370 0.04052 73 63 10 0
5063 Great! He was the best mate I’ve had. 1.1370 0.04497 73 64 8 1
5064 Bon apetit. A little amuse bouche from the Chef. 1.1370 0.04052 73 63 10 0
5065 Shall I wrap this up for you? 1.1370 0.04902 73 65 6 2
5066 Inamorato Fettuccini, Signora. 1.1370 0.04902 73 65 6 2
5067 Yes, but you do not realize that it is better for you that one mantis die for your brood than for all of them to perish. 1.1370 0.04052 73 63 10 0
5068 For your pleasure, Madam! The Chef’s specialty! She only murders the best cuts! 1.1370 0.04497 73 64 8 1
5069 The Gregor Samsa special you ordered, Sir. 1.1370 0.04052 73 63 10 0
5070 Air-fried to perfection, as you prayed. 1.1370 0.04052 73 63 10 0
5071 The Girl Can’t Hepl It 1.1370 0.04497 73 64 8 1
5072 Here is your brother. Straight from the trash. 1.1370 0.04052 73 63 10 0
5073 Well done Madam! Another successful first date. 1.1370 0.04497 73 64 8 1
5074 A perfect match for white wine and unfertilized eggs. 1.1370 0.04052 73 63 10 0
5075 It’s too well done! 1.1370 0.04497 73 64 8 1
5076 Perhaps a family member or friend? 1.1370 0.04902 73 65 6 2
5077 This is how we’re done? 1.1370 0.04902 73 65 6 2
5078 You be the judge. 1.1370 0.04497 73 64 8 1
5079 At Montodea,we serve revenge warm with a traditional citrus dressing. 1.1370 0.04052 73 63 10 0
5080 He said he was joining you for dinner. 1.1370 0.04497 73 64 8 1
5081 I told him only fools fall in love. 1.1370 0.04497 73 64 8 1
5082 Here we are madame–“La Tete De Votre Mari” 1.1368 0.04129 95 84 9 2
5083 Sir, your dinner is served, al dente! 1.1364 0.04019 88 77 10 1
5084 Cooked to perfection! 1.1364 0.04331 88 78 8 2
5085 Courtesy of The Red Queen. 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
5086 Thank you. My prayers have been answered. 1.1364 0.03679 88 76 12 0
5087 We have prepared him post insemination for your pleasure 1.1364 0.03679 88 76 12 0
5088 They’re typically reserved for only Lobster Newberg patrons, madame, but I shall retrieve for you a Delmonico’s bib at once! 1.1364 0.05239 66 59 5 2
5089 I hope you will not chew my head off after your meal, sir ! 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
5090 Are you sure it’s fresh? 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
5091 Here we are: Antennae and mandibles lightly crisped, eyes medium rare. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
5092 What’s that you said about divorcing me? 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
5093 Don’t they say revenge is a dish best served cold?! 1.1364 0.04019 88 77 10 1
5094 For First Course, we have your Boyfriend Du Jour. 1.1364 0.04257 66 57 9 0
5095 Yes it is a long commute, but according to Einstein 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
5096 Is it stewed enough definitely? 1.1364 0.04773 66 58 7 1
5097 Your mate’s head, with a side of chips, madam. 1.1358 0.04214 81 71 9 1
5098 Baptiste Confit, Mademoiselle, as you ordered. 1.1358 0.04214 81 71 9 1
5099 Your dinner guest arrived ahead of you, hoping that you would understand. 1.1358 0.04214 81 71 9 1
5100 I believe madam mentioned she wanted her exe’s head on a platter, and chef thought it sounded like a fine special. 1.1358 0.04565 81 72 7 2
5101 How awkward to see my ex here. 1.1358 0.03830 81 70 11 0
5102 Compliments of the chef.”
“…I think his eyes are bigger than my stomach.
1.1358 0.04892 81 73 5 3
5103 Voila! Your recent husband. 1.1358 0.04214 81 71 9 1
5104 Families differ… you know. 1.1358 0.04565 81 72 7 2
5105 Poor old Yorick could use a little salt 1.1358 0.03830 81 70 11 0
5106 Your dearly departed sends you his best. 1.1358 0.05198 81 74 3 4
5107 Here you go! It was like you said: he left nothing behind but a tantalizing aroma and a B-I-G smile! 1.1358 0.04214 81 71 9 1
5108 And would Madam like a cigarette? 1.1358 0.04565 81 72 7 2
5109 You’d best start praying Mr. Mantis. 1.1358 0.03830 81 70 11 0
5110 Voila! Tete a Beau 1.1358 0.04214 81 71 9 1
5111 ‘Delicious. A spouse and a supper in one course! 1.1358 0.04214 81 71 9 1
5112 Will your significant other be joining us? 1.1358 0.04214 81 71 9 1
5113 I always loved for his his brains. 1.1358 0.04214 81 71 9 1
5114 It’s so nice to dine out for a change. 1.1356 0.04495 59 51 8 0
5115 When I told Fred you had ordered the wings to go, he laughed his head off 1.1356 0.04495 59 51 8 0
5116 He got here early and we had no seating. 1.1356 0.04495 59 51 8 0
5117 It’s easy to get a-head of yourself here 1.1354 0.03810 96 84 11 1
5118 Mum did say he’d gone to pot. 1.1354 0.03810 96 84 11 1
5119 Prepared with love. 1.1351 0.04440 74 65 8 1
5120 Grilled snapper de la tête 1.1351 0.04839 74 66 6 2
5121 your mate date was late so we took the liberty 1.1351 0.05207 74 67 4 3
5122 I did check with my manager. There won’t be a shared plate charge. 1.1351 0.04001 74 64 10 0
5123 Mabel?!? 1.1351 0.04440 74 65 8 1
5124 That isn’t my husband. I specifically asked for my husband. 1.1351 0.04001 74 64 10 0
5125 At that moment, Jill began to suspect John was having an affair. 1.1351 0.04440 74 65 8 1
5126 This is revenge! I asked for to be served cold. 1.1351 0.04839 74 66 6 2
5127 Mmmmmmmmmmm; Just what I’d Prayed for! 1.1351 0.04839 74 66 6 2
5128 If they could see me now. 1.1351 0.04440 74 65 8 1
5129 Intellectually I know it’s
beef and potatoes. Emotionally
I’m not so sure.”
1.1351 0.04440 74 65 8 1
5130 I’ve been preying for this day 1.1348 0.04285 89 79 8 2
5131 Mate-‘n-then rare, just as you ordered. 1.1348 0.03976 89 78 10 1
5132 Our specialty, served every 17 years. 1.1348 0.04285 89 79 8 2
5133 Uncle Bob! 1.1348 0.03976 89 78 10 1
5134 And no prayer is required before digging in! 1.1343 0.04197 67 58 9 0
5135 Voilà Ms. Horseman 1.1343 0.05585 67 61 3 3
5136 Well, my husband always was a good provider 1.1343 0.04197 67 58 9 0
5137 A biblical dish for a praying mantis: the John-The-Baptist Special. 1.1343 0.05164 67 60 5 2
5138 Your prayers have been answered, Ms. Mantis. Enjoy your meal. 1.1343 0.04705 67 59 7 1
5139 Your mate, medium rare, but crispy, as requested, Madame 1.1343 0.05164 67 60 5 2
5140 For the final course of this meal, I present the chef. 1.1343 0.04705 67 59 7 1
5141 Well at least we mated first 1.1343 0.04705 67 59 7 1
5142 he does look tasty … but I’m afraid that’s the wrong ex-husband 1.1343 0.04705 67 59 7 1
5143 Your husband–who never finished a single project–is well done… 1.1343 0.04197 67 58 9 0
5144 Love him once, love him always”

“It had a bit part in Salome

1.1343 0.04705 67 59 7 1
5145 Spoon? As I told him, no thanks. 1.1343 0.04197 67 58 9 0
5146 Pardon moi, but I do believe I ordered the escargot 1.1343 0.04197 67 58 9 0
5147 Here’s to the lady who lunches! 1.1341 0.04512 82 73 7 2
5148 We spiced it up so it doesn’t taste like your cousin. 1.1341 0.03787 82 71 11 0
5149 Your fiancé, ma’am. 1.1341 0.05137 82 75 3 4
5150 Excuse me,I ordered Putin’s head 1.1341 0.04512 82 73 7 2
5151 Are you sure that’s my wife’s head? It doesn’t look like my wife. 1.1341 0.03787 82 71 11 0
5152 Alas, poor Yorick. I hope he’s as tasty as he was fecund. 1.1341 0.04165 82 72 9 1
5153 Kinda sus 1.1341 0.04165 82 72 9 1
5154 The cassoulet is good but I don’t know sometimes I just wanna bite the head off 1.1341 0.03787 82 71 11 0
5155 I’ve taken the liberty of putting the rest of your date into a doggy bag. 1.1333 0.04240 90 80 8 2
5156 Sir, can I bring you a shot of Tequila? 1.1333 0.04777 75 67 6 2
5157 My man is cooking. 1.1333 0.04384 75 66 8 1
5158 Zorak, prepared as you like him, Madame. The chef recommends the glazed aardvark medallions as a pallate cleanser. And, this is uncomfortable, but management reminds you for next time this is not a clothing optional establishment. Bon appetit! Burrp! 1.1333 0.03603 90 78 12 0
5159 Would you like to conduct grace? 1.1333 0.03935 90 79 10 1
5160 Your Imperial Majesty: as requested, the head of K’Blorzx the Macropterous, who was spreading rebellion among the peasants. 1.1333 0.04777 75 67 6 2
5161 Here’ the after-sex smoke you ordered, madam. 1.1333 0.03935 90 79 10 1
5162 oh, yeah, dude! Might I have some chillies and a tall cold one? 1.1333 0.03952 75 65 10 0
5163 As you requested sir- your arch enemy’s head on a platter. 1.1333 0.04384 75 66 8 1
5164 Don’t forget to leave a review on Tinder and Yelp. 1.1333 0.04384 75 66 8 1
5165 He wasn’t much of a lover, but let’s see if he can cook. 1.1333 0.03952 75 65 10 0
5166 Just as you asked, mam. Your husband on a platter. 1.1333 0.04777 75 67 6 2
5167 For dessert tonight, we have an excellent Brett. 1.1333 0.04525 90 81 6 3
5168 So this is what they meant about my uncle losing his head. 1.1333 0.04777 75 67 6 2
5169 Date night? 1.1333 0.04384 75 66 8 1
5170 As requested, Princess Salome 1.1333 0.04240 90 80 8 2
5171 His name was Mike. Enjoy! 1.1333 0.03952 75 65 10 0
5172 Price? Have no fear Madame, mates rates of course. 1.1333 0.04384 75 66 8 1
5173 You got the last one! 1.1333 0.04777 75 67 6 2
5174 Notre spécialité, tête de mari. 1.1333 0.03952 75 65 10 0
5175 From the young gentleman at the bar, miss. 1.1333 0.04384 75 66 8 1
5176 Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him….but his head is about to be in a better place. 1.1333 0.03603 90 78 12 0
5177 just think of it like masturbation 1.1333 0.04384 75 66 8 1
5178 I recognize him from lunch. 1.1333 0.04777 75 67 6 2
5179 So much easier than mating. 1.1333 0.05023 60 53 6 1
5180 Here’s your husband. Your children will be served for desert. 1.1333 0.03952 75 65 10 0
5181 We prepared your favorite. Tete monsieur! 1.1333 0.03952 75 65 10 0
5182 I so hate dining alone. 1.1333 0.03952 75 65 10 0
5183 My husband never smelled or looked tastier. 1.1333 0.03952 75 65 10 0
5184 I’m afraid we ran out of Swansons but may I present Mrs. Paul? 1.1333 0.03952 75 65 10 0
5185 If love hotels could talk 1.1325 0.04779 83 75 5 3
5186 A not-so subtle message to vacate the restaurant. 1.1325 0.03744 83 72 11 0
5187 He put up a valiant fight, but lost his head in the bet. 1.1325 0.03744 83 72 11 0
5188 We practice mindful cannibalism. 1.1325 0.04118 83 73 9 1
5189 Voici, as a starter, I propose “Mante Religieuse à la sauce Tough Love” 1.1325 0.04118 83 73 9 1
5190 Cousin Larry always did say he looked like a snack. 1.1325 0.04461 83 74 7 2
5191 Voila! Congratulations on your column in Modern Love. 1.1325 0.04118 83 73 9 1
5192 Your date..err..DINNER, Madam. 1.1325 0.04118 83 73 9 1
5193 It’s my ex, looking delicious. 1.1325 0.04118 83 73 9 1
5194 I remember him well. 1.1325 0.03744 83 72 11 0
5195 Tonight’s special, madame Salome. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
5196 Looks delicious, Pierre. But isn’t this premature? I mean, we haven’t procreated yet. 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
5197 Fromage de la elegance, as you requested. 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
5198 Your mate, monsieur. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
5199 The serenely satisfied looks of your “ladies night” conquests are quite remarkable. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
5200 Your Mante à la Salome, Madame 1.1324 0.04640 68 60 7 1
5201 Wait, that’s my cousin Ralph… Oh well, what the hell. He looks pretty good.” 1.1324 0.05505 68 62 3 3
5202 You’ll love it, the head is over the heels! 1.1324 0.05505 68 62 3 3
5203 Your husband with au gratin potatoes, as requested, Madam. 1.1324 0.04140 68 59 9 0
5204 Voila! Enjoy your honeymoon. 1.1324 0.05091 68 61 5 2
5205 For you, our Lovers Feast. 1.1319 0.04196 91 81 8 2
5206 He’s still a handsome fellow. 1.1319 0.03894 91 80 10 1
5207 Miss, your date has arrived. 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5208 Arh, Uncle Herbert he also did have a good head on his shoulders 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5209 Alas, poor Yorich, I knew him well, of infinite jest–and of infinite taste. 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5210 Your choice Madam: Either he was delicate … see? Or a Delicacy. 1.1316 0.03903 76 66 10 0
5211 I could have eaten this at home! 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5212 I asked for a head of lettuce!!
I’m a PRAYING mantis.
Not a PREYING mantis.
1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5213 Madam, this appetizer should be a perfect complement to your entree. 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5214 Compliments of the mater d’. 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5215 Now put it down, get out of here and lock the door.” 1.1316 0.03903 76 66 10 0
5216 Here you go Madam, the father of your children as ordered. 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5217 Today’s special is head chef inspired. 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5218 Happy anniversary, Mrs Mantis! 1.1316 0.03903 76 66 10 0
5219 Is this all you have? I am hungry allright but I not going chow down myself 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5220 I remember him! Those eyes! 1.1316 0.04717 76 68 6 2
5221 If madam is interested in the thorax soufflé I suggest she order it now. 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5222 As you ordered, the Salome special 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5223 And you’re sure this is plant-based? 1.1316 0.04329 76 67 8 1
5224 We’re so pleased you joined us for date night. 1.1316 0.04717 76 68 6 2
5225 That doesn’t look like a drink to me sir 1.1313 0.03412 99 86 13 0
5226 We do our best to keep it in the family. 1.1310 0.04072 84 74 9 1
5227 Would you care for this with or without a salad. 1.1310 0.03703 84 73 11 0
5228 It’s been a pleasure to serve you and your companion. 1.1310 0.04072 84 74 9 1
5229 your mate with a side of carrots, ma’am 1.1310 0.04072 84 74 9 1
5230 Tender love, honey 1.1310 0.04724 84 76 5 3
5231 Filet of your former mate in a white wine reduction 1.1310 0.04410 84 75 7 2
5232 Just as you like it,well done. 1.1310 0.04072 84 74 9 1
5233 Are you sure that’s my mate? 1.1310 0.03703 84 73 11 0
5234 When your prayers are answered 1.1304 0.05428 69 63 3 3
5235 Madame est servie 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
5236 Your spouse, fixed just the way you like.” 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
5237 Courtesy of the head chef. 1.1304 0.04576 69 61 7 1
5238 This is called post-honeymoon treat. 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
5239 Oh, now I understand the concept of blind head 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
5240 All our suppliers guarantee no pesticides have been used 1.1304 0.03854 92 81 10 1
5241 Is that

If that’s John, I hope he’s well cooked.

1.1304 0.03530 92 80 12 0
5242 I was so glad he accepted my dinner invitation! 1.1304 0.04576 69 61 7 1
5243 The gentleman is forward about his intentions 1.1304 0.04084 69 60 9 0
5244 The chef recommends your second husband well-done. 1.1304 0.05020 69 62 5 2
5245 Oh you cooked my wife! She looks delicious. 1.1304 0.04576 69 61 7 1
5246 Excellent I told him to met me at 9. 1.1304 0.05020 69 62 5 2
5247 Please send it back to the kitchen. It doesn’t look cooked! 1.1300 0.03933 100 89 9 2
5248 Compliments of the head chef. Rare and well done. 1.1300 0.03667 100 88 11 1
5249 He wasn’t such a great lay. 1.1299 0.04659 77 69 6 2
5250 The answer to my prayers 1.1299 0.03856 77 67 10 0
5251 I’d like to wish you both a happy anniversary! Bon Appetite. 1.1299 0.05012 77 70 4 3
5252 You’re trying to intimidate me 1.1299 0.03856 77 67 10 0
5253 Lovely. I can’t tell you how long it’s been since I’ve had a second date.”

(My apologies – had a typo in my first submission

1.1299 0.05342 77 71 2 4
5254 First, I’ll head to the pickles! 1.1299 0.05012 77 70 4 3
5255 Your mate is served with potatoes and carrots, bon appetit 1.1299 0.04276 77 68 8 1
5256 Please enjoy this delightful amuse-bouche prepared especially for you by Chef Hélène. 1.1299 0.04659 77 69 6 2
5257 This will ensure you stay ahead of the game. 1.1299 0.04659 77 69 6 2
5258 As requested, the chef’s recommended food pairing for your wine selection. 1.1299 0.03856 77 67 10 0
5259 Uhm.. I prefer it well-done. 1.1299 0.04276 77 68 8 1
5260 Elizabeth’s friends had told her that the costume was too much (she was only researching a sequel after all). But she would show them. She would show them all. 1.1294 0.04671 85 77 5 3
5261 The perfect mate. Good at sex and tasty, too! 1.1294 0.04027 85 75 9 1
5262 That’ll teach him 1.1294 0.03662 85 74 11 0
5263 Is this your husband? 1.1294 0.04671 85 77 5 3
5264 The unexpected house special assured that Pierre wasn’t getting a tip. 1.1294 0.04027 85 75 9 1
5265 Is this the amuse-bouche? Because, I am not amused! 1.1294 0.03662 85 74 11 0
5266 I’ve already enjoyed the rest of his body. I hope he gives good head! 1.1294 0.04361 85 76 7 2
5267 It would be incestuous if I eat thisbut I will drink the wine 1.1294 0.03662 85 74 11 0
5268 I know you asked for the dish to be cold, but the chef forgot. 1.1294 0.04027 85 75 9 1
5269 Your wife’s head Sir – enjoy 1.1294 0.04027 85 75 9 1
5270 Yummy! Please have him sent to my room with an extra dirty martini, a copy of National Geographic, and a carton of Virgin Slims. I have some unfinished business to attend to.” 1.1294 0.03662 85 74 11 0
5271 Your wife, sir. 1.1290 0.03815 93 82 10 1
5272 Your husband, madam, with sauce mantis. 1.1290 0.04869 62 55 6 1
5273 See, I told you we only needed one seat. 1.1290 0.04292 62 54 8 0
5274 You husband, on a bed of rice. 1.1290 0.03495 93 81 12 0
5275 I had him two days ago, bring me something fresh. 1.1290 0.03815 93 82 10 1
5276 Enjoy your first and last date. 1.1290 0.04292 62 54 8 0
5277 We call it “Head de la You.” 1.1287 0.03632 101 89 11 1
5278 Your husband’s running late so he said you could start eating without him. 1.1286 0.04514 70 62 7 1
5279 His last words? “She’s not interested in spooning.” 1.1286 0.04030 70 61 9 0
5280 This evening, we start off with our first-course and your date. 1.1286 0.04030 70 61 9 0
5281 Wow! Bob must have found a mate. I’ll need a little catsup. 1.1286 0.04952 70 63 5 2
5282 Bon Appétit, the chef mated with him personally for you. 1.1286 0.04030 70 61 9 0
5283 He would taste better with a little more lemon 1.1286 0.04514 70 62 7 1
5284 I understand you use to date him. 1.1286 0.04030 70 61 9 0
5285 You went absolutely Goblin Mode on his ass and honestly I respect the hell out of it. Since you’re single now do you wanna go to Dave & Buster’s with me? Not as a date, I’m celibate. I don’t want to be a priest, I just hate intimacy. 1.1286 0.04514 70 62 7 1
5286 He was a wonderful guy, but truth be told he gave me a bit of a headache. 1.1286 0.04514 70 62 7 1
5287 This, Madam, pairs well with your grasshopper cocktail 1.1286 0.04952 70 63 5 2
5288 Your romantic dinner madam. 1.1286 0.04514 70 62 7 1
5289 It’s what I ordered but I expected it to be served in a glass. 1.1286 0.04030 70 61 9 0
5290 Monsieur. 1.1282 0.04602 78 70 6 2
5291 This is the lowest low carb we have. 1.1282 0.04602 78 70 6 2
5292 Sir, your other guests will be arriving for the main course and dessert.
Frank Buckley Andover MA
1.1282 0.03810 78 68 10 0
5293 Bon appétit madame! 1.1282 0.04224 78 69 8 1
5294 What a gentleman – taking me to dinner FIRST! 1.1282 0.04602 78 70 6 2
5295 Thanks, but I have to mate first. 1.1282 0.03810 78 68 10 0
5296 Dinner for two. .. er, one! 1.1282 0.03810 78 68 10 0
5297 Your ex wife. 1.1282 0.03810 78 68 10 0
5298 Your lover, ma’am. 1.1282 0.04224 78 69 8 1
5299 man is what he eats 1.1282 0.04602 78 70 6 2
5300 Harriet? Sweet thing. 1.1282 0.03810 78 68 10 0
5301 Madame: Proof that there is no God.” 1.1282 0.04602 78 70 6 2
5302 Mon dieu! C’est Charlotte! 1.1282 0.04224 78 69 8 1
5303 That’s no gentleman! That’s my husband! 1.1282 0.03810 78 68 10 0
5304 Today’s special. Fresh from the grass. 1.1282 0.04950 78 71 4 3
5305 I had told Aunt Suzie that when she passed-on,
I would prefer her breast meat.
1.1282 0.04224 78 69 8 1
5306 The sex was most appetizing. I’m so ready for the main course. 1.1282 0.03810 78 68 10 0
5307 Little did Ted know that he would have to cuddle afterwards. 1.1282 0.04602 78 70 6 2
5308 It’s rare, just as you ordered it. 1.1282 0.03810 78 68 10 0
5309 Your lunch date, steamed and served on a platter, as requested. 1.1282 0.03810 78 68 10 0
5310 This desert will surely be better than the main course 1.1279 0.03982 86 76 9 1
5311 This is the Gregor Samsa special. 1.1279 0.04312 86 77 7 2
5312 Your husbands head, served with his internal organs 1.1279 0.04312 86 77 7 2
5313 Ze special, madam. I’m sorry your husband could not stay. 1.1279 0.04312 86 77 7 2
5314 No, no. It’s “Netflix and Chill” FIRST; THEN dinner 1.1279 0.03623 86 75 11 0
5315 Religiously cooked, ma’am… 1.1279 0.04312 86 77 7 2
5316 Madam, other females prefer raw as opposed to medium rare . 1.1277 0.04068 94 84 8 2
5317 He was my favorite mate! 1.1270 0.04229 63 55 8 0
5318 ‘Severed Mantis Head’ with steamed vegetables.
Enjoy!
1.1270 0.04796 63 56 6 1
5319 I HOPE THAT YOUU HAVE A NICE CLARET TO GO WITH IT? 1.1268 0.03977 71 62 9 0
5320 Here we have our special
Head of Husband
1.1268 0.04454 71 63 7 1
5321 Your Ex on a Platter! Just as you requested Madam. 1.1268 0.03977 71 62 9 0
5322 May I recommend a wine pairing for you and your husband? 1.1268 0.03977 71 62 9 0
5323 You look ravenous. 1.1268 0.03977 71 62 9 0
5324 Alas poor Eunice, I knew her well… 1.1268 0.04454 71 63 7 1
5325 Other dines are just losing their heads over this next dish. 1.1268 0.03977 71 62 9 0
5326 Bon appetit, vegetarian! 1.1268 0.03977 71 62 9 0
5327 Honey I’m Home 1.1268 0.04454 71 63 7 1
5328 Thanks for giving me Head 1.1268 0.04454 71 63 7 1
5329 No, thanks; it would only take up space. You should be sufficient later. 1.1268 0.04454 71 63 7 1
5330 That looks yummy! I always said he looked good enough to eat. 1.1268 0.04454 71 63 7 1
5331 Susan’s heart quickened. This was crazy. Was she really about to eat the cranium of her BEST FRIEND’s mate? 1.1266 0.03765 79 69 10 0
5332 What wine do you recommend for severed heads? 1.1266 0.04174 79 70 8 1
5333 Your husband, madam, just like you asked, well salted, medium rare and properly dead. Enjoy. 1.1266 0.04546 79 71 6 2
5334 Pray tell! 1.1266 0.03765 79 69 10 0
5335 You are the best head waiter around! 1.1266 0.04890 79 72 4 3
5336 Your ex’s head on a platter, just as you ordered it.” 1.1266 0.04174 79 70 8 1
5337 you did ask for medium rare? 1.1266 0.04174 79 70 8 1
5338 Would you mind if I had a cigarette?” 1.1266 0.04546 79 71 6 2
5339 Alas Poor Yorick, you cooked him medium well!” 1.1266 0.04546 79 71 6 2
5340 Your first course, madam. Enjoy! 1.1266 0.03765 79 69 10 0
5341 She said, “Eat me.” I guess I took it too literally. 1.1266 0.04546 79 71 6 2
5342 Alas, poor Yorick, I knew him. .. In the Biblical sense. 1.1266 0.04174 79 70 8 1
5343 Janice Lehman’s husband. Broiled. Medium. Squeeze of lemon. As you ordered. 1.1264 0.04265 87 78 7 2
5344 …and which ethnic variety is being served today? 1.1264 0.03584 87 76 11 0
5345 Viola, monsieur, our pest dish! 1.1264 0.03939 87 77 9 1
5346 We guarantee our non-insect meals 1.1264 0.03939 87 77 9 1
5347 I ordered it with the neck. 1.1264 0.03939 87 77 9 1
5348 Is that my late husband? 1.1264 0.03939 87 77 9 1
5349 That is just rude. 1.1250 0.03925 72 63 9 0
5350 Madam, your Valentine. 1.1250 0.03987 96 86 8 2
5351 The heady aromas of this dish are off-putting to some, but I find it to be divine! 1.1250 0.04167 64 56 8 0
5352 Your entree as requested, Madame. No need for that messy appetizer business. 1.1250 0.03721 80 70 10 0
5353 Your entree Madame, Broiled Head of Husband. 1.1250 0.04820 72 65 5 2
5354 Waiter, if you open your eyes you might find you’re at the wrong table. 1.1250 0.04492 80 72 6 2
5355 There we are, sir. Our finest post-coitus cuisine. 1.1250 0.04820 72 65 5 2
5356 I’m sorry, I asked for well done. 1.1250 0.04725 64 57 6 1
5357 This dish is an acquired taste. 1.1250 0.04124 80 71 8 1
5358 Hmm nothing more tasty than eating his leftovers. 1.1250 0.04124 80 71 8 1
5359 I’m a gourmet lover 1.1250 0.03897 88 78 9 1
5360 Your date—served with russet potatoes and shallots. 1.1250 0.04167 64 56 8 0
5361 Let me assure you madam, it IS free-range. 1.1250 0.04124 80 71 8 1
5362 Your dinner date called to say he would be a little late. 1.1250 0.03925 72 63 9 0
5363 And for the second course we have the first date! 1.1250 0.04395 72 64 7 1
5364 Free range, organic and locally razed, but not much of a thinker. (And I pray you enjoyed the sex with his headless, gyrating body) 1.1250 0.04124 80 71 8 1
5365 This wasn’t the head I asked for… 1.1250 0.03925 72 63 9 0
5366 Dear me, the service is never ending. 1.1250 0.04167 64 56 8 0
5367 /can you please serve me. I just had my nails done 1.1250 0.04219 88 79 7 2
5368 I said burnt to a crisp. His head is still green. 1.1250 0.03925 72 63 9 0
5369 If you have to kill your mate, I prefer him fileted. 1.1250 0.04219 88 79 7 2
5370 Very well chosen, madame. Prepared of course with his boots off. 1.1250 0.04124 80 71 8 1
5371 It’s so nice not to have to camouflage myself when dining alone 1.1250 0.03721 80 70 10 0
5372 I’ve always wanted to eat my own grandfather. Maybe I’ll become as wise as he was! 1.1250 0.04124 80 71 8 1
5373 Sir, I need to remind you that consuming the raw or under-cooked head of your mate may increase your risk of food-borne illness. 1.1250 0.04219 88 79 7 2
5374 Not to worry; it is made of mashed potatoes — delicious. 1.1250 0.04124 80 71 8 1
5375 Your fresh-bit fillet minion. Enjoy. 1.1250 0.03721 80 70 10 0
5376 As you like it, over-easy. 1.1237 0.03948 97 87 8 2
5377 Commemorating the moment which, you insert a bit of an invertebrate. 1.1236 0.03508 89 78 11 0
5378 Edible insects have superior health benefits due to their high levels of vitamin B12, iron, zinc, fiber, essential amino acids, omega-3 and omega-6 fatty acids, and antioxidants….” 1.1235 0.04438 81 73 6 2
5379 21st Century Sexual Cannibalism 1.1235 0.04076 81 72 8 1
5380 Your husband under glass,Madam!! 1.1235 0.03678 81 71 10 0
5381 Well, I guess that explains why she didn’t return my calls! 1.1235 0.04773 81 74 4 3
5382 I had a pet snake as a kid. It was okay, I guess. I don’t recall whatever happened to it. Anyway, bon appetit. 1.1235 0.04076 81 72 8 1
5383 Poor Charlie, he thought I was praying… 1.1235 0.04438 81 73 6 2
5384 Your ex-wife paid for dinner. 1.1235 0.04076 81 72 8 1
5385 As they say, monsieur: Your head on a plate! 1.1235 0.04076 81 72 8 1
5386 Our chef Katy did it. 1.1235 0.04076 81 72 8 1
5387 We call this the “I don’t have to sleep with you first to get dinner” plate. 1.1235 0.04076 81 72 8 1
5388 I suggested we meet for dinner. 1.1235 0.04076 81 72 8 1
5389 It’s a woman’s world, after all. 1.1235 0.04076 81 72 8 1
5390 We call it the Donner Plate Special. 1.1233 0.04338 73 65 7 1
5391 Monsieur, I’m sure you recognize the house special! 1.1233 0.03875 73 64 9 0
5392 Japan Serving Justice in WWII 1.1233 0.03875 73 64 9 0
5393 apparently Luigi was sending a subtle message 1.1233 0.03875 73 64 9 0
5394 The Chef hopes, madam, that you will
enjoy as well the fried aphids. They were
your late husband’s favorite.
1.1233 0.04338 73 65 7 1
5395 Ah, revenge is sweet. But I would have preferred the chef’s special. 1.1233 0.04338 73 65 7 1
5396 I knew I should have chosen a plant based option! 1.1233 0.03875 73 64 9 0
5397 Should we say a little prayer? After all, last night was wild. 1.1233 0.03875 73 64 9 0
5398 The couples special. 1.1233 0.03875 73 64 9 0
5399 and how many guests do you expect at the wedding? 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
5400 Your Jiminy Criquetoise, sir. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
5401 Your last date… no judging here. 1.1231 0.04107 65 57 8 0
5402 My favorite season! 1.1231 0.04655 65 58 6 1
5403 Oh dear, I told him I’d have his head on a platter but didn’t think he would take it literally! 1.1228 0.05050 57 51 5 1
5404 Is this supposed to be a reflection of a bad relationship with myself? 1.1228 0.04386 57 50 7 0
5405 I can assure you that he was raised and sacrificed humanely, 1.1222 0.04129 90 81 7 2
5406 OMG!! That’s my wife! 1.1222 0.03815 90 80 9 1
5407 Madam, your ‘gender role à la crème’. 1.1220 0.03636 82 72 10 0
5408 Voila! Chef’s surprise… 1.1220 0.03636 82 72 10 0
5409 Your “Mate du Jour”, ma’am. Bon appétit! 1.1220 0.04029 82 73 8 1
5410 Dining with my mate has really improved this year. 1.1220 0.04387 82 74 6 2
5411 Tender and spicy, madame. Much like the salami appetizer. 1.1220 0.04029 82 73 8 1
5412 Mademoiselle! 1.1220 0.04387 82 74 6 2
5413 Madame, your pickled sperm will be served A La Carte 1.1220 0.04029 82 73 8 1
5414 Enjoy the chef’s special: Tinder Match with Ramps and Speck 1.1220 0.03636 82 72 10 0
5415 Mate’s head à la française, madam. 1.1216 0.04282 74 66 7 1
5416 No thanks. I’m just going to pop out for a smoke. 1.1216 0.04695 74 67 5 2
5417 Head of mating lover, medium rare as requested sir. 1.1216 0.03825 74 65 9 0
5418 Now we know who won the last head game. 1.1216 0.03825 74 65 9 0
5419 Uncle Bugsy, wake up! 1.1216 0.03825 74 65 9 0
5420 It was definitely worth it. 1.1216 0.04282 74 66 7 1
5421 Every couple has at least one big fight! 1.1216 0.03825 74 65 9 0
5422 The meal looks like your family,but it comes from another species! 1.1216 0.03825 74 65 9 0
5423 This restaurant is a fine place,it can help me get ahead! 1.1216 0.03825 74 65 9 0
5424 As madam ordered: his head on a platter. 1.1216 0.04282 74 66 7 1
5425 He had a satisfied look on his face so I can only assume where the rest of him is. 1.1212 0.04048 66 58 8 0
5426 Mom! 1.1212 0.04588 66 59 6 1
5427 First time I’ve gotten head. 1.1212 0.04588 66 59 6 1
5428 It’s our hot date anniversary. 1.1212 0.04588 66 59 6 1
5429 We figured since you were steaming mad after our service last time that we would serve you a hot fresh new face for your own personal enjoyment. 1.1212 0.05071 66 60 4 2
5430 You did say medium rare, Madam! 1.1212 0.04048 66 58 8 0
5431 Madam, the eyes remained glassy, but tender, as you wished. 1.1212 0.04048 66 58 8 0
5432 Just as you like them. 1.1212 0.04048 66 58 8 0
5433 – A sdpeciality for you. A young male head after copulation! 1.1209 0.03775 91 81 9 1
5434 Wow!! Be careful what you pray for…Whew! 1.1209 0.03436 91 80 11 0
5435 Mom? Is that you? 1.1209 0.04374 91 83 5 3
5436 May I also convey, Madame, congratulations for your impending brood? 1.1207 0.04315 58 51 7 0
5437 Salome receives the head of John The Baptist 1.1205 0.04336 83 75 6 2
5438 Sorry uncle 1.1205 0.03595 83 73 10 0
5439 Al dente, I hope. 1.1205 0.03595 83 73 10 0
5440 Well done, as you requested, Ms Mantis 1.1205 0.03983 83 74 8 1
5441 I thought tonight, you were having Carl for dinner? 1.1205 0.03595 83 73 10 0
5442 It’s what he deserves for being a bad lover. 1.1200 0.03778 75 66 9 0
5443 A pinot noir would pair well Madam 1.1200 0.04228 75 67 7 1
5444 Voila, your lobster of the land. 1.1200 0.04228 75 67 7 1
5445 Voila Monsieur, Your Entrée! 1.1200 0.03778 75 66 9 0
5446 The Honeymoon Special, mam. Medium rare. 1.1200 0.03778 75 66 9 0
5447 How romantic! 1.1200 0.04228 75 67 7 1
5448 You are the envy of all of the ladies on The Bachelor. 1.1200 0.04228 75 67 7 1
5449 Answered prayers. 1.1200 0.04228 75 67 7 1
5450 We’re so sorry, uncle Albert. 1.1200 0.04228 75 67 7 1
5451 Be carefuo what you pray for 1.1194 0.04523 67 60 6 1
5452 You had the rest for breakfast, sir 1.1194 0.03991 67 59 8 0
5453 Well sir, you did order off the organic menu. 1.1194 0.03991 67 59 8 0
5454 It’s amazing how civilized your species has become, madam. 1.1190 0.03555 84 74 10 0
5455 This dish is ‘tray’ avant-garde and delivers a truly
heady dining experience.
1.1190 0.03555 84 74 10 0
5456 ahhhh… my ex. Better well done than rare! 1.1190 0.03555 84 74 10 0
5457 The chef prepares them just as he finds them, in this case, hot and steamy. 1.1190 0.03555 84 74 10 0
5458 Actually revenge can be served steaming hot. And with great results! 1.1190 0.04286 84 76 6 2
5459 I’ve heard that it’s a good idea to call a head. 1.1190 0.04286 84 76 6 2
5460 Madam, prepared exclusively for you, braised
Head of Lover Under Glass.
1.1190 0.03555 84 74 10 0
5461 You said you were serving “George” – that’s doesn’t look like George. 1.1190 0.03938 84 75 8 1
5462 I always whisper, “Think you’re hot for me now? You’ll get even hotter by dinner.” Works every time. 1.1190 0.04286 84 76 6 2
5463 Revenge is a dish best served cold, but be careful, this plate is hot. 1.1186 0.04246 59 52 7 0
5464 Uhhh, that’s not what I ordered! 1.1186 0.04246 59 52 7 0
5465 Ah, just as I remember her! 1.1186 0.04246 59 52 7 0
5466 This is Biden’s idea of a new American staple. The border is open even to mathises, praying or not. Just vote Democrat. 1.1186 0.05451 59 54 3 2
5467 Chef Henri delicately prepared your lover in an aged balsamic vinegar reduction with hints of sherry. Bon appetite, Madame. 1.1186 0.05451 59 54 3 2
5468 At the Inn our motto is,
First the AHHHHs then the MMMMs.
1.1184 0.04175 76 68 7 1
5469 I don’t want to eat it. I just wanted to kill it and never see it again. The sex was bad. 1.1184 0.04175 76 68 7 1
5470 Yes, much better served hot. 1.1184 0.03731 76 67 9 0
5471 He retired I think he changed his mind 1.1184 0.04175 76 68 7 1
5472 I thought I was an ant, not an anteater 1.1184 0.04576 76 69 5 2
5473 I asked for fresh kill. That’s not fresh. I know, because I killed him and ate him last week. 1.1184 0.04175 76 68 7 1
5474 Yum…….headcheese, my favorite. 1.1184 0.04576 76 69 5 2
5475 Bon appétit, Ms. Salome. 1.1184 0.04175 76 68 7 1
5476 Haute love, with a side of flies. 1.1184 0.03731 76 67 9 0
5477 There is a fine line between guest and pest 1.1184 0.03731 76 67 9 0
5478 And for tonight’s special, we have a free-range, bug-fed, chef’s husband. 1.1184 0.03731 76 67 9 0
5479 Voilà — well done. 1.1184 0.04175 76 68 7 1
5480 It’s not as rare as you’d think. 1.1183 0.03698 93 83 9 1
5481 Yikes! 1.1176 0.04459 68 63 3 2
5482 Your Mate with Basque Cassoulet Dipping Sauce; another Chianti Madam? 1.1176 0.04459 68 61 6 1
5483 True Love 1.1176 0.04238 85 77 6 2
5484 No, I already said grace when I bit it off. 1.1176 0.04459 68 61 6 1
5485 Now I understand why your husband isn’t dining with us tonight. 1.1176 0.04927 68 62 4 2
5486 Time for 23andMe! 1.1176 0.03893 85 76 8 1
5487 One steamed head-of-your-lover with dressing on the side, as requested. 1.1176 0.03936 68 60 8 0
5488 As per your dying Ex’s final wish. 1.1176 0.03893 85 76 8 1
5489 Agnostic for years,Nancy would only say grace if a meal felt Instagram-worthy. 1.1176 0.04459 68 61 6 1
5490 Okay, so I can take a hint. I’m outta here! 1.1176 0.04459 68 61 6 1
5491 ‘Your so vain, you probably think this song is about you, don’t you. Don’t you?’ 1.1176 0.04927 68 62 4 2
5492 Is it gluten-free?”

Carl Yaffe, Rockville, Marylan

1.1176 0.03893 85 76 8 1
5493 My date should be arriving at any time now. Oh, here he comes, and he brought food! 1.1176 0.03936 68 60 8 0
5494 You earned it. 1.1176 0.03893 85 76 8 1
5495 I ate him last night 1.1176 0.03893 85 76 8 1
5496 He decided to skip the foreplay. 1.1176 0.04927 68 62 4 2
5497 As you requested: you from the future.

This is not how you die, but it is how you will be remembered.

1.1176 0.03936 68 60 8 0
5498 He always did have separation anxiety. Oh well. Have any hot sauce for dipping? 1.1176 0.04927 68 62 4 2
5499 Viola! Your husband’s post-coital head. 1.1176 0.04459 68 61 6 1
5500 Ahh.. just what I ordered a praying mantis head. 1.1176 0.03936 68 60 8 0
5501 Husband: You and me is all there is for dinner 1.1176 0.03893 85 76 8 1
5502 Very appetizing. Looks just like my late husband. 1.1176 0.03936 68 60 8 0
5503 I guess that will teach him not to mess with your 4 million daughters. 1.1170 0.03660 94 84 9 1
5504 Well, you could have recommended a red. 1.1169 0.03685 77 68 9 0
5505 I hope the dining will be as good as the sex was. 1.1169 0.03685 77 68 9 0
5506 Prithee, who do you think I am, Judith? 1.1169 0.03685 77 68 9 0
5507 Is this what you were praying for, Miss Mantis?””Yes, Pierre, so much more civilized than biting off his head. 1.1169 0.03685 77 68 9 0
5508 I don’t know what I ever saw in him… 1.1169 0.04123 77 69 7 1
5509 I have nothing but fond memories of his courtship of me! 1.1169 0.04123 77 69 7 1
5510 And people wonder why they call us
“Preying Mantises”!
1.1169 0.03685 77 68 9 0
5511 This is so much more civilized than my customary postmating ritual. 1.1169 0.03685 77 68 9 0
5512 Hand picked from my windshield this morning 1.1169 0.03685 77 68 9 0
5513 As ordered, ma’am, your husband’s head, served on a silver platter. 1.1169 0.04519 77 70 5 2
5514 I have no idea who it was. There are so dammed many of you.
Enjoy!
1.1167 0.04808 60 54 5 1
5515 My little pretty 1.1167 0.04179 60 53 7 0
5516 Excellent presentation! I can see why they named you the head waiter! 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
5517 Tonight we have served for you your late husbands head, Bon appetite 1.1163 0.03477 86 76 10 0
5518 I didn’t know ant eaters were cannibals. 1.1163 0.04191 86 78 6 2
5519 It was love at first sight, and I loved him for his mind. 1.1163 0.03850 86 77 8 1
5520 Oh dear, he was such a brainiac. 1.1163 0.04191 86 78 6 2
5521 First I will say grace. 1.1159 0.04397 69 62 6 1
5522 Madame, ‘the mate-muncher’’ special. Enjoy! 1.1159 0.03882 69 61 8 0
5523 Congratulations! 1.1159 0.03882 69 61 8 0
5524 It doesn’t get any fresher than this! 1.1159 0.04397 69 62 6 1
5525 I pray I don’t get mad mantis disease 1.1159 0.04397 69 62 6 1
5526 You asked for something familiar.” 1.1159 0.03882 69 61 8 0
5527 If only he had not cheated on me, we could have left that silver plate untarnished in the cabinet. 1.1158 0.03300 95 84 11 0
5528 For our 45th course, the chef presents “Tiny Claws”, Alamo’d. 1.1154 0.04073 78 70 7 1
5529 The Chef’s Special…Our fresh catch of the day! 1.1154 0.03641 78 69 9 0
5530 What? No frog’s legs? 1.1154 0.04463 78 71 5 2
5531 Courtesy of Aunt Lydia. 1.1154 0.03641 78 69 9 0
5532 This is a head bobbiling meal 1.1154 0.04463 78 71 5 2
5533 No! Appendage is a dish best served cold! 1.1154 0.04073 78 70 7 1
5534 ? Happy husband to you … ? 1.1149 0.03808 87 78 8 1
5535 Compliments of your other girlfriend. 1.1149 0.03808 87 78 8 1
5536 So, there you are – and what kind of sauce with your Ex’s head? 1.1149 0.03808 87 78 8 1
5537 As the Chef here at palace #20, may I present Ukraine, Mr. Putin. 1.1149 0.04455 87 80 4 3
5538 Wow, should I exclusively date in Tribeca? 1.1148 0.04732 61 55 5 1
5539 Wow,my dreams are getting really odd. 1.1148 0.04115 61 54 7 0
5540 I’ve been praying for this meal for ever. 1.1148 0.04115 61 54 7 0
5541 We call it the Salome 1.1148 0.04115 61 54 7 0
5542 I guess I’ll be stopping at Culver’s again. Check please. 1.1148 0.04732 61 55 5 1
5543 Best date ever” 1.1148 0.04732 61 55 5 1
5544 It’s only fair that you get head in return. 1.1146 0.03881 96 87 7 2
5545 Yummy. It looks just like my recent favorite suitor. 1.1143 0.04337 70 63 6 1
5546 DO bite the colleague’s head that feeds you. 1.1143 0.04337 70 63 6 1
5547 The answer to a mantis’ prayer, Sir. 1.1143 0.04337 70 63 6 1
5548 Vegans sure are getting creative 1.1143 0.04791 70 64 4 2
5549 I know you have always loved our special! 1.1143 0.04337 70 63 6 1
5550 Do my eyes deceive me? 1.1143 0.04337 70 63 6 1
5551 I said Bring me the Head of Alfredo Garcia ! – not my friend gary! 1.1143 0.04337 70 63 6 1
5552 I kept telling him no and then I lost my head and so did he. 1.1143 0.04791 70 64 4 2
5553 I now pronounce you man and wife. You may eat the groom. 1.1143 0.03830 70 62 8 0
5554 Compliments of the chief. Congratulations on your artificial insemination. 1.1143 0.03830 70 62 8 0
5555 Brother… 1.1139 0.04023 79 71 7 1
5556 Mr. Cannibal, as you ordered, with cannabis for dessert. 1.1139 0.04408 79 72 5 2
5557 Monsieur Marinated in Chermoula, as requested. 1.1139 0.04023 79 71 7 1
5558 No…No.. I specifically asked for John the Baptist ! 1.1139 0.03597 79 70 9 0
5559 Don’t worry, it’s lab grown. 1.1139 0.03597 79 70 9 0
5560 I trust you had a happy wedding, at least. 1.1139 0.03597 79 70 9 0
5561 Your mate admirably served his purpose … again. 1.1136 0.04099 88 80 6 2
5562 Here is your gourmet poutine” 1.1136 0.04099 88 80 6 2
5563 If these silly chaps knew what was good for them, they might take you out to dinner first. 1.1136 0.03403 88 78 10 0
5564 Unlike Phylis who ‘fell in love,’ I’ll dine my way to an extra 50 eggs. 1.1136 0.03767 88 79 8 1
5565 Let’s go out to dinner, you said. We’ll get to know each other you said. 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
5566 My friend just called. George was her favorite too. Can I get it to go? 1.1129 0.04052 62 55 7 0
5567 Your hot date, Madam! 1.1127 0.03779 71 63 8 0
5568 I do hope he hasn’t been overcooked, we did make some lovely children this year. 1.1127 0.03779 71 63 8 0
5569 Karen’s demand to speak to the head waiter didn’t go as she planned. 1.1127 0.04279 71 64 6 1
5570 Another unwanted suitor I take it, ma’am? 1.1127 0.03779 71 63 8 0
5571 She won’t ever lie to me again. 1.1127 0.04726 71 65 4 2
5572 The chef promises that this year it is not overdone. 1.1127 0.03779 71 63 8 0
5573 I asked for the special not the special one. 1.1125 0.04704 80 74 3 3
5574 My wife! 1.1125 0.03975 80 72 7 1
5575 Your meta and potatoes, Mr. Samsa. 1.1125 0.04355 80 73 5 2
5576 Yes, I agree that someone didn’t do the full job, but that’s why it’s half off. Well, I suppose it’s fully off. Bon appetite! 1.1125 0.03975 80 72 7 1
5577 Your dinner, madam.
Hope it’s done to your liking.
1.1125 0.03555 80 71 9 0
5578 Might I recommend pairing with a full-bodied cigarette? 1.1125 0.03555 80 71 9 0
5579 Stop the clocks, it’s amazing. 1.1125 0.03975 80 72 7 1
5580 Who you lookin at bro? 1.1125 0.03975 80 72 7 1
5581 Don’t worry, it’s just your crazy uncle. 1.1125 0.03555 80 71 9 0
5582 Our celebatarian special. 1.1124 0.04055 89 81 6 2
5583 UMMMM! Smells yummy! This might be the best one yet! 1.1124 0.03727 89 80 8 1
5584 Was he netted or harpooned? 1.1124 0.04055 89 81 6 2
5585 That’s killer mantis! 1.1124 0.04055 89 81 6 2
5586 Madame Mantis, your prayers have been answered. Monsieur is done to perfection. 1.1111 0.03514 81 72 9 0
5587 Presenting the new Impossible Grasshopper head. 1.1111 0.04662 72 66 4 2
5588 You are welcome to say a prayer for her before I begin carving.” 1.1111 0.04662 72 66 4 2
5589 Pregnancy cravings! 1.1111 0.04588 63 57 5 1
5590 Will madam be taking a moment to pray first? 1.1111 0.04222 72 65 6 1
5591 As I promised only one final service was needed. 1.1111 0.04303 81 74 5 2
5592 Albert hated to admit that his mother was right all along. He could NOT watch Sci-Fi movies before bed. 1.1111 0.04222 72 65 6 1
5593 Which of you do you think is better off? 1.1111 0.03991 63 56 7 0
5594 She was no Queen of hearts, so…
Off with her head!
1.1111 0.03687 90 81 8 1
5595 Tonight’s special… Husband of the year. 1.1111 0.04662 72 66 4 2
5596 Oh dear! Just when I thought you’d never show up. 1.1111 0.04222 72 65 6 1
5597 Congratulations on the successful mating, and here is his steamed head on a platter. 1.1111 0.04662 72 66 4 2
5598 Is that you my friend 1.1111 0.03928 81 73 7 1
5599 At least she’s been well preserved. 1.1111 0.03928 81 73 7 1
5600 His head on a platter monsieur, cooked to perfection just the way you like it. 1.1111 0.03331 90 80 10 0
5601 Sometimes you just know when he’s gonna be a good one! 1.1111 0.03331 90 80 10 0
5602 Your friend was a little steamed. 1.1111 0.03991 63 56 7 0
5603 So cannibalism is now OK among the smart set? 1.1111 0.03730 72 64 8 0
5604 Husband à la Mode, Madame. 1.1111 0.03928 81 73 7 1
5605 Medium rare, Sir, as you requested! 1.1099 0.04265 91 84 4 3
5606 Edna preferred sophisticated men. 1.1098 0.03883 82 74 7 1
5607 Alas poor Yorick… 1.1098 0.03473 82 73 9 0
5608 Sir, you said bring be something I would like. 1.1098 0.03473 82 73 9 0
5609 Thank you for moving my wife’s chair away. 1.1098 0.03473 82 73 9 0
5610 Is it “free-range or organic? 1.1098 0.03883 82 74 7 1
5611 They always fall for my Bumble account 1.1098 0.03473 82 73 9 0
5612 I’m not that hungry 1.1098 0.03473 82 73 9 0
5613 Should I place the order for the insect soufflé now? 1.1098 0.03883 82 74 7 1
5614 Sex, death and dessert. Delicious. 1.1096 0.04600 73 67 4 2
5615 Not much on brains but beautiful eyes. 1.1096 0.04166 73 66 6 1
5616 Medium rare as you requested and it saves money on funerals 1.1096 0.04166 73 66 6 1
5617 Turn an everyday meal into a special occasion. 1.1096 0.03681 73 65 8 0
5618 Hmmm… I’ll just grow another one. 1.1096 0.04166 73 66 6 1
5619 Ah, Lobsteyoric–I asked for him ‘well’. 1.1094 0.03932 64 57 7 0
5620 Say “Grace” 1.1094 0.03932 64 57 7 0
5621 Here you are ma’am, S.O.S, seared to perfection. Bon appetite! 1.1094 0.04519 64 58 5 1
5622 I ordered him rare 1.1094 0.04519 64 58 5 1
5623 extra cannibalism as requested 1.1091 0.04242 55 49 6 0
5624 Bon appe-Todd 1.1084 0.03434 83 74 9 0
5625 I am presuming it was safe and protected. 1.1084 0.03838 83 75 7 1
5626 Your apres l’amour special for one. 1.1084 0.03434 83 74 9 0
5627 As you ordered, sir, fat-free, sugar-free, gluten-free, grass-fed, and organic. 1.1084 0.03838 83 75 7 1
5628 I was wondering why he wasn’t returning my calls. Does that come with a side? 1.1084 0.03434 83 74 9 0
5629 Happy Anniversary, Madame. 1.1081 0.04540 74 68 4 2
5630 Your dinner companion, sir. 1.1081 0.04112 74 67 6 1
5631 It was the only part that I couldn’t feed my larvae 1.1081 0.03634 74 66 8 0
5632 Now, that’s what I call getting head. 1.1081 0.04540 74 68 4 2
5633 I am praying that is not what I think it is! 1.1081 0.03634 74 66 8 0
5634 Compliments from the Headless Horseman two tables over….. 1.1081 0.04540 74 68 4 2
5635 You may want to skip the cocktail, now that you’re pregnant. 1.1081 0.03634 74 66 8 0
5636 I assume You are the head waiter? 1.1081 0.03634 74 66 8 0
5637 Is it fresh?”

“As always, madam. Right after he said ‘I love you.’

1.1077 0.04452 65 59 5 1
5638 And this is what will happen to you if you keep eyeing the female at the bar. 1.1077 0.03875 65 58 7 0
5639 Is every-body now ready to eat
Not quite
1.1077 0.04452 65 59 5 1
5640 Nice to see my date called ahead. 1.1077 0.04963 65 60 3 2
5641 You asked for his head on a plate 1.1077 0.04452 65 59 5 1
5642 Madame has already dined on the rest of him.” 1.1077 0.04963 65 60 3 2
5643 Grammi! I’ve missed you so! 1.1077 0.03875 65 58 7 0
5644 What the hell, he’s only my second cousin. 1.1075 0.03573 93 84 8 1
5645 He was the one. 1.1071 0.03395 84 75 9 0
5646 Madame, your date avec pommes frites! 1.1071 0.03794 84 76 7 1
5647 Your wife apologizes for her lateness, sir. 1.1071 0.04155 84 77 5 2
5648 Your mate, medium rare 1.1067 0.03588 75 67 8 0
5649 I see madame will be dining alone tonight. 1.1067 0.04060 75 68 6 1
5650 That is not what I meant when I said “I want to have my husband over for dinner”. 1.1067 0.03588 75 67 8 0
5651 Last Thursday. An excellent vintage. 1.1067 0.04482 75 69 4 2
5652 See my darling? I told you you would join me for a classy meal after sex… 1.1067 0.03588 75 67 8 0
5653 Now wait a minute garçon, that’s not my paramour! 1.1067 0.04482 75 69 4 2
5654 I’m so glad you could come for dinner! 1.1067 0.03588 75 67 8 0
5655 Fuck you moby 1.1067 0.03588 75 67 8 0
5656 Are you sure he was a Baptist? 1.1064 0.03847 94 86 6 2
5657 Madame…the Specialty of the House. 1.1064 0.03847 94 86 6 2
5658 Darling, I gave you my body for the children. Now my head for you alone, sweetums. 1.1061 0.03819 66 59 7 0
5659 Do you think he will be fatty enough? His short antennae and differently shaped eyes, indicate that he may be too young to be harvested. 1.1061 0.03819 66 59 7 0
5660 Are you going to say grace? 1.1061 0.04387 66 60 5 1
5661 It is the chef’s sincerest hope that your mate will satisfy you a second time. 1.1061 0.03819 66 59 7 0
5662 Looks like seconds. Yum. Wanna join me? 1.1061 0.03819 66 59 7 0
5663 Freshly ripped off during le intercourse sexual. 1.1061 0.04387 66 60 5 1
5664 We guarantee it to be a non-relative. 1.1061 0.03819 66 59 7 0
5665 I guarantee that this is the most handsome husband who ever entered this establishment. 1.1053 0.04424 76 70 4 2
5666 Oh my, the scent is arousing! 1.1053 0.03544 76 68 8 0
5667 Marinated just the way you like them with a side of leaf salad 1.1053 0.04805 76 71 2 3
5668 I think that was my husband Jerry,(welp) survival of the fittest. 1.1053 0.04008 76 69 6 1
5669 Oh, there you are, Charles. 1.1045 0.04819 67 62 3 2
5670 Do you know if it will be a boy or a girl? 1.1045 0.03765 67 60 7 0
5671 Wow, so that’s where my little sister went…
She looks good!
1.1045 0.04324 67 61 5 1
5672 It’s PC gone mad 1.1045 0.04324 67 61 5 1
5673 Should I wrap up the leftovers while they’re still warm ma’am ? 1.1045 0.03765 67 60 7 0
5674 I will pray and pay for him 1.1039 0.03958 77 70 6 1
5675 Harry? I thought I already ate you! 1.1039 0.03958 77 70 6 1
5676 Sherry prayed ceaselessly for her lovers demise, yet never
suspected it could turn out this well.
1.1039 0.03500 77 69 8 0
5677 He requested skipping the preliminaries and proceeding straight to the good part, Madam. 1.1039 0.03958 77 70 6 1
5678 Whatever you are doing… Don’t stop! 1.1039 0.04369 77 71 4 2
5679 Your arch rival’s head on a platter, sir. As requested. 1.1039 0.03500 77 69 8 0
5680 This is our finest self-serve meal, sir. 1.1039 0.03500 77 69 8 0
5681 Your husband, madam.”
Cal Bellamy, Munster, I
1.1039 0.04369 77 71 4 2
5682 So, all that praying and you couldn’t even wait until after dinner? 1.1039 0.03500 77 69 8 0
5683 I never ate him with a knife and fork before! 1.1039 0.03958 77 70 6 1
5684 Your enemy is served, sir. 1.1039 0.03958 77 70 6 1
5685 Thank you, my husband looks delicious! 1.1034 0.04034 58 52 6 0
5686 I think you meant free range not free reign 1.1029 0.03713 68 61 7 0
5687 May I have a napkin to put over my head? 1.1029 0.03713 68 61 7 0
5688 My, doesn’t Hubby look delicious! Just the dish I’ve been praying for. 1.1029 0.03713 68 61 7 0
5689 Being special is not the same as the Specialité! 1.1029 0.03713 68 61 7 0
5690 I have a feeling that this guy is going to ghost me too. 1.1029 0.03713 68 61 7 0
5691 Will you require separate checks, madam? 1.1029 0.03713 68 61 7 0
5692 Lightly toasted, just the way you like it. 1.1026 0.03457 78 70 8 0
5693 Oh no!! So, that’s what happened to dear Cousin Fred!!! 1.1026 0.03457 78 70 8 0
5694 The head of my competitor is my favorite delicacy. I get to incorporate his constituents into my body politic. 1.1026 0.03457 78 70 8 0
5695 This is a personal favorite of the chef de cuisine. 1.1026 0.03909 78 71 6 1
5696 Oui, the answer to your prayers. 1.1026 0.03457 78 70 8 0
5697 Mmm – my taste always did stay a head of my partner! 1.1026 0.03909 78 71 6 1
5698 We had some good times. 1.1026 0.03909 78 71 6 1
5699 Admittedly it’s an attractive dish, but I’m a vegan. 1.1023 0.03628 88 80 7 1
5700 Alas Poor Yorick, I ordered Capuzzelle. 1.1017 0.04647 59 54 4 1
5701 She looks delicious. 1.1017 0.03969 59 53 6 0
5702 Not yet. I have not finished saying grace…. 1.1014 0.04203 69 63 5 1
5703 Here’s your Valentine’s Day special, Madam. 1.1014 0.04203 69 63 5 1
5704 Sir, the chef would like to know if you also wish to complain about the menu choices. 1.1014 0.03661 69 62 7 0
5705 Steamy. 1.1013 0.03862 79 72 6 1
5706 Oh, I see. It’s Marge’s ex, Sam. I was told she doesn’t finish what she starts. 1.1011 0.03929 89 82 5 2
5707 Thanks, that is why I always request a heads-up! 1.1011 0.03214 89 80 9 0
5708 Oh yeah! I remember him. We never got to second base! 1.1011 0.03589 89 81 7 1
5709 Wrong table Kevin 1.1011 0.04241 89 83 3 3
5710 That’s my husband and be looks undercooked.
I only eat well done exes.
1.1010 0.03659 99 91 6 2
5711 It’s so ironic you are playing Beethoven’s 9th in the background. 1.1000 0.03612 70 63 7 0
5712 It’s as if I’ve had this dish before? 1.1000 0.04145 70 64 5 1
5713 Madame said she will join you shortly, she is regenerating. 1.1000 0.03906 60 54 6 0
5714 Our plague special, head of the first born. 1.1000 0.03375 80 72 8 0
5715 It’s low carb. 1.1000 0.04618 70 65 3 2
5716 Courtesy uf ze Child Services, ve present ze “Baby-Daddy Head on a Platter” Special for you mademoiselle! 1.1000 0.04210 80 74 4 2
5717 Per your request sir. You enemy’s head on a platter. Cooked to order. 1.1000 0.04570 80 75 2 3
5718 Your wife called to say she can’t make it. 1.1000 0.03375 80 72 8 0
5719 Bill? 1.1000 0.04145 70 64 5 1
5720 Will the gentleman be returning? 1.1000 0.03815 80 73 6 1
5721 I hear the taste of the head alone is well, missing something. 1.1000 0.03612 70 63 7 0
5722 Prepared with a saffron sauce the gentleman raved about. 1.1000 0.04145 70 64 5 1
5723 And here’s Pete, your rare husband. Medium rare. 1.1000 0.03815 80 73 6 1
5724 The Chef’s signature dish: deconstructed boyfriend. 1.0988 0.03770 81 74 6 1
5725 I’m praying that you are joking. 1.0988 0.03336 81 73 8 0
5726 Catch of the day from our head chef. 1.0988 0.03336 81 73 8 0
5727 umm.. that is one of those lowly species, but good enough! 1.0988 0.04159 81 75 4 2
5728 Is this my last meal before I turn up on somebody’s platter? 1.0988 0.04159 81 75 4 2
5729 i hope his head tastes as good as the rest of him. 1.0988 0.03336 81 73 8 0
5730 Le baggie dog, mademoiselle” 1.0988 0.03770 81 74 6 1
5731 Bonjour, madame, and here is a head that looks like your head. I serve it to you on this platter. I see you have your knife and fork. Excellent. As you can see, this head is steaming. It was cooked just now. I give it to you with crackers. Voila! 1.0986 0.04089 71 65 5 1
5732 Smells delicious! So much better than when we were married. 1.0986 0.04089 71 65 5 1
5733 Excellent presentation. 1.0986 0.04089 71 65 5 1
5734 I take it I should clear the second place-setting as well, Madame? 1.0986 0.03563 71 64 7 0
5735 Might I suggest a California Cabernet to pair with your lover, Madame? 1.0986 0.03563 71 64 7 0
5736 Butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth. 1.0986 0.03563 71 64 7 0
5737 My mate looks scrumptious. 1.0986 0.03563 71 64 7 0
5738 I had a chef in the back make a bust because I knew you wouldn’t believe me. It’s pretty good, he got a degree in sculpture I think. Anyway bro your face looks like a dick and big-ass balls and we’ve just been losing our minds back there. 1.0986 0.04089 71 65 5 1
5739 Sir, his head on a platter. 1.0986 0.04089 71 65 5 1
5740 Your dinner, Sir Hanniba 1.0984 0.03845 61 55 6 0
5741 Is it medium rare? 1.0984 0.04499 61 56 4 1
5742 Menopause is no excuse for denying yourself. 1.0978 0.03477 92 84 7 1
5743 Manny wanted kids, so I agreed to the prenup. 1.0978 0.03477 92 84 7 1
5744 Do you want the lobster crackers? 1.0976 0.03297 82 74 8 0
5745 Head of Saint John the Baptists 1.0976 0.03726 82 75 6 1
5746 It’s gluten free,right? 1.0976 0.03297 82 74 8 0
5747 Voila. The end-cut. 1.0972 0.04034 72 66 5 1
5748 Ah, my first date. 1.0972 0.03516 72 65 7 0
5749 Claude. Lightly sauteed. A la Eucalyptus.” 1.0972 0.03516 72 65 7 0
5750 Your Catch of the Day Maam
Prepared Fresh!
1.0972 0.03516 72 65 7 0
5751 Ahhh! The tastiest of my late partners … 1.0968 0.04429 62 57 4 1
5752 Your order, Madam. Monsignor is rare with sliced crickets on the side. 1.0968 0.03785 62 56 6 0
5753 Would madame like a ramekin of catsup with this? 1.0964 0.03682 83 76 6 1
5754 Take it away. I don’t want someone else’s sloppy seconds. 1.0964 0.03259 83 75 8 0
5755 CANNIBALISM 1.0964 0.03682 83 76 6 1
5756 Your post-coital mate’s head, sir. 1.0964 0.04062 83 77 4 2
5757 YUM! YUM! Daddy! 1.0959 0.03470 73 66 7 0
5758 Perhaps madame would prefer covered?” 1.0959 0.03981 73 67 5 1
5759 My late husband 1.0959 0.03470 73 66 7 0
5760 She’s STILL hot! Yummm! 1.0959 0.03981 73 67 5 1
5761 Chef’s surprise Ms. Greenaway 1.0959 0.03981 73 67 5 1
5762 Fortunately I look nothing like my mother. 1.0959 0.03470 73 66 7 0
5763 Here’s the “special military operation” you ordered. 1.0959 0.04433 73 68 3 2
5764 This dinner sure is fly! 1.0952 0.03640 84 77 6 1
5765 I hope madame has saved room for the grand finale. 1.0952 0.03728 63 57 6 0
5766 As requested, ma’am, your date braised in a fine white wine reduction. 1.0952 0.03222 84 76 8 0
5767 Your post-workout meal, ma’am. 1.0952 0.03222 84 76 8 0
5768 I didn’t mean that literally 1.0946 0.03929 74 68 5 1
5769 We shortcut past the mating ritual to get straight to the main dish. 1.0946 0.03425 74 67 7 0
5770 If I may, how many failed marriages is it? 1.0946 0.04375 74 69 3 2
5771 I present your husband cooked just like your last one, enjoy! 1.0943 0.04053 53 48 5 0
5772 I meant the other kind of fun guy… 1.0938 0.04295 64 59 4 1
5773 Madam, your entree, well done. 1.0938 0.04295 64 59 4 1
5774 I’m sorry, but that isn’t my date. 1.0933 0.03878 75 69 5 1
5775 Love means never having to say you’re sorry.

John R. Hauge, Washington, DC

1.0933 0.03382 75 68 7 0
5776 I asked for the head table, not a head on a table 1.0930 0.03558 86 79 6 1
5777 Oh dear, that looks completely different than the description on the menu. 1.0930 0.04258 86 81 2 3
5778 ‘Your enemy, sir’ 1.0923 0.03618 65 59 6 0
5779 I don’t know WHY I order this; it’s eyes are looking straight at you and it’s tricky getting the meat out! May I have some extra butter? 1.0923 0.04231 65 60 4 1
5780 Care for a little head of Mantis appetizer? 1.0923 0.04231 65 60 4 1
5781 Bon appetit, I hope your third date was enjoyable. 1.0923 0.03618 65 59 6 0
5782 Madam, your second course of Carl. 1.0923 0.04231 65 60 4 1
5783 And Happy Anniversary, Madame. 1.0921 0.03829 76 70 5 1
5784 Regrettably, we’re out of roaches but the head is still relatively lo-cust. 1.0921 0.03339 76 69 7 0
5785 I didn’t believe them when they said we’d all be eating bugs….but here we are. 1.0921 0.03339 76 69 7 0
5786 Exactly as you ordered it…
medium-prayer.
1.0921 0.03829 76 70 5 1
5787 It’s Uncle Mordechai! 1.0921 0.03339 76 69 7 0
5788 Here it is…. Do you want your next ex cooked the same way ..medium rare? 1.0920 0.03519 87 80 6 1
5789 Here is your broother’s head as you requested. 1.0920 0.03116 87 79 8 0
5790 You want the dessert menu? You’re getting ahead of yourself. 1.0920 0.03116 87 79 8 0
5791 I look delicious. 1.0909 0.03566 66 60 6 0
5792 we carve the turkey, to look like your Ex” 1.0909 0.03298 77 70 7 0
5793 Tonight’s special, The Head of Your Enemy on a Platter, as you ordered sir. My I sugget a wine? 1.0909 0.04169 66 61 4 1
5794 That looks amazing! I always look forward to your seasonal menu. 1.0909 0.04169 66 61 4 1
5795 He was 15 minutes late..again, and yes, I said I wanted his head on a platter… 1.0909 0.03780 77 71 5 1
5796 Check, please — and fast! 1.0909 0.03298 77 70 7 0
5797 “I knew I’d have my revenge someday.” 1.0897 0.03734 78 72 5 1
5798 A way to get insects to leave your dining establishment. 1.0896 0.04108 67 62 4 1
5799 Your second helping of ‘just a guy from the grass’ Madam. 1.0896 0.03515 67 61 6 0
5800 But I don’t eat fish! 1.0896 0.04108 67 62 4 1
5801 Sir, your ex marinated in harissa sauce, just as you ordered. 1.0896 0.04626 67 63 2 2
5802 O. MY, GAWD!!! She used to date my brother. 1.0896 0.03515 67 61 6 0
5803 Working in the restaurant business is tough. Everyone’s a cricket nowadays. 1.0896 0.03515 67 61 6 0
5804 His name was John… 1.0893 0.03845 56 51 5 0
5805 Mr. Ant, I see you have requested that you be served ahead of anybody else. Enjoy! 1.0886 0.03688 79 73 5 1
5806 Compliments from the gentleman at the corner table. 1.0886 0.03218 79 72 7 0
5807 It’s New Yorker style ‘poor taste’ 1.0886 0.03218 79 72 7 0
5808 Really Sir! That looks like someone I once dated! 1.0882 0.04049 68 63 4 1
5809 Pray, can I bring you anything else, ma’am? 1.0882 0.03465 68 62 6 0
5810 Your date sent you this in hopes of you not eating his. 1.0875 0.04054 80 75 3 2
5811 Dear god, I implore you, curse this meal! 1.0875 0.03643 80 74 5 1
5812 Um… I said fresh! 1.0875 0.03179 80 73 7 0
5813 He looks better that the day I met him for a one night stand 1.0875 0.03179 80 73 7 0
5814 Madame your date, medium rare. 1.0875 0.03179 80 73 7 0
5815 I wanted a grasshopper in a glass, not a grasshopper under glass! 1.0870 0.04495 69 65 2 2
5816 Sauterelle sautée with your Sauternes?”
“Oh no so this is a French IHOP?
1.0870 0.04495 69 65 2 2
5817 I apologize, the kitchen was unable to serve this cold… 1.0870 0.03992 69 64 4 1
5818 Hang on… Did we say grace yet? 1.0864 0.03141 81 74 7 0
5819 …and the piece de résistance, the Naked Lunch. 1.0857 0.03937 70 65 4 1
5820 Pardon moi Monsieur, but that was not my husband. I’d like to communicate with the Maitre’d.” 1.0857 0.03937 70 65 4 1
5821 Submitted for your approval:
To Serve Grasshopper
1.0857 0.03370 70 64 6 0
5822 Your husband strange sense of humor 1.0857 0.03370 70 64 6 0
5823 …and did you enjoy the ‘appetizer,’ madame 1.0857 0.03370 70 64 6 0
5824 I wanted Zelensky head served not mine. 1.0854 0.03957 82 77 3 2
5825 Yes, this is your Tender™️ date. You sure did swipe right! 1.0854 0.03557 82 76 5 1
5826 I ordered a CUP of Grasshopper, not my friend’s head!! 1.0851 0.03265 94 87 6 1
5827 Just as requested. Head on a platter. With roasted veg 1.0845 0.03883 71 66 4 1
5828 And here’s your ‘Hollywood Divorce’ special. 1.0833 0.03034 84 77 7 0
5829 I told him it was fine to have 3000 babies, but I would cut him off from palimony 1.0833 0.03280 72 66 6 0
5830 But, I’m a vegetarian, no thanks! 1.0833 0.03280 72 66 6 0
5831 …and for dessert, your husband. 1.0824 0.02999 85 78 7 0
5832 I’m having a period 1.0822 0.03779 73 68 4 1
5833 Oh, that looks Great! Thank you so much for helping fulfill her last Will and Testament ! 1.0822 0.03237 73 67 6 0
5834 For your main course, your partner steamed to room temperature. May I say, you have impeccable skills; a clean cut. Chocolate-covered legs for dessert, madamtid? 1.0822 0.03237 73 67 6 0
5835 Oh Yorick I knew him well 1.0822 0.03779 73 68 4 1
5836 Here you are, ma’am. Herbert medium rare. 1.0822 0.03237 73 67 6 0
5837 I hope it’s a boy. 1.0822 0.03237 73 67 6 0
5838 I’m not sure what made him think he could get away. 1.0814 0.03396 86 80 5 1
5839 Eat up you dipshit loser 1.0811 0.03195 74 68 6 0
5840 At Zau we cater to carnivores and cannibals alike. 1.0806 0.03486 62 57 5 0
5841 You are what you eat, except after C 1.0800 0.03681 75 70 4 1
5842 That moment when you must declare innocence or allow yourself to be pressured to apologize. 1.0800 0.03154 75 69 6 0
5843 Madame Mantis – your ‘mari’ is al dente! Bon appetit! 1.0800 0.03681 75 70 4 1
5844 When “feeling sees” reaches an uncomfortable level. 1.0800 0.03154 75 69 6 0
5845 What the…?!?! 1.0794 0.03433 63 58 5 0
5846 Try Katy-dids for dinner tonight! Known for their resolve of marital issues 1.0794 0.03433 63 58 5 0
5847 Fresh, today, as you requested. 1.0789 0.03114 76 70 6 0
5848 …Potato, po-tah-to, tomato, to-mah-to…” 1.0789 0.03114 76 70 6 0
5849 What poor taste your Chef has! Bring me back either a fresh worm, bee or mosquito. 1.0789 0.03114 76 70 6 0
5850 Can I change my order to soup? 1.0781 0.03381 64 59 5 0
5851 Are you sure this is good brain-food 1.0781 0.03381 64 59 5 0
5852 Oh good, it’s just playing dead. 1.0781 0.03381 64 59 5 0
5853 I’ve been eying that dish for a while! 1.0779 0.03075 77 71 6 0
5854 I hope our children have your eyes. 1.0779 0.03075 77 71 6 0
5855 What a delectable and sweet surprise — Irma! 1.0778 0.03249 90 84 5 1
5856 He would have loved to be here with you. 1.0769 0.03037 78 72 6 0
5857 Saturday’s Delight, fried as well as Sunday’s Chef might. 1.0769 0.03331 65 60 5 0
5858 OMG! He was always too tender to hang out with the rest of us 1.0769 0.03037 78 72 6 0
5859 Voila, “Steaming Carnality”. 1.0759 0.03000 79 73 6 0
5860 Madame,you never forget your first. 1.0750 0.02963 80 74 6 0
5861 My in-laws just need to be done a little longer. 1.0750 0.03887 80 76 2 2
5862 Can you suggest a wine pairing for genetically advantaged fare? 1.0746 0.03871 67 63 3 1
5863 Oy. Again? 1.0741 0.03415 81 76 4 1
5864 I trust that this main course adequately reflects the passion of the reproduction affair you had! 1.0735 0.03189 68 63 5 0
5865 Hey that’s my brothers head, I have been looking for him everywhere” 1.0735 0.03189 68 63 5 0
5866 Chopsticks please! 1.0735 0.03189 68 63 5 0
5867 Caspian you’ve outdone yourself! 1.0735 0.03189 68 63 5 0
5868 Maybe I’m getting a Head of Myself 1.0735 0.03815 68 64 3 1
5869 I pray that you’ll like it. 1.0732 0.02894 82 76 6 0
5870 Your ex-husband, Madame. 1.0729 0.03051 96 90 5 1
5871 She begged us to let her have lunch with you. 1.0725 0.03144 69 64 5 0
5872 Haven’t I seen you somewhere before? 1.0725 0.03144 69 64 5 0
5873 Your ex’s head on a platter,madam. 1.0725 0.03761 69 65 3 1
5874 Steamed Mantis Head, in blood consommé, accompanied by a Chicory Salad”
Enjo
1.0714 0.03709 70 66 3 1
5875 Your ‘Ick’ Madame. 1.0714 0.03473 56 52 4 0
5876 Tete-a-Tete, monsieur, medium rare. 1.0714 0.03709 70 66 3 1
5877 My neighbor just won’t shut up about how sustainable bugs are for protein. I mean buddy — I get it. Anyway maybe trying some will quiet him. You have any neighbors like that? 1.0714 0.02827 84 78 6 0
5878 I ordered a head of lettuce,not a head if mantis. 1.0704 0.04171 71 68 1 2
5879 Ha, I told her two could play this game. She didn’t think I knew
how to bite her head off first.”
1.0704 0.03657 71 67 3 1
5880 Okay, okay! I’ll pay in full. And leave a decent tip this time. 1.0702 0.03413 57 53 4 0
5881 I’m sorry. I thought you were an ant eater. 1.0698 0.02763 86 80 6 0
5882 But I said the thorax. You’ll have to take it back 1.0698 0.02763 86 80 6 0
5883 It’s on the house. He ordered his food returned to the kitchen. 1.0694 0.03017 72 67 5 0
5884 Here you are ma’am, the Henrietta VIII Special. 1.0694 0.03017 72 67 5 0
5885 Guess I prayed too hard! 1.0690 0.02732 87 81 6 0
5886 Mom ??? 1.0690 0.02732 87 81 6 0
5887 This is an atrocious dish, I will be reporting this establishment immediately. 1.0685 0.02977 73 68 5 0
5888 Your relative is served. 1.0676 0.03512 74 70 3 1
5889 I gave permission for my son to be a server here, not to be served here. 1.0676 0.02938 74 69 5 0
5890 Can’t you see He’s underdone –
We hadn’t had sex yet !!
1.0676 0.02938 74 69 5 0
5891 I’m sorry I specifically ordered Alfredo Garcia! 1.0676 0.02938 74 69 5 0
5892 Your mother-in-law’s head. Especially for you, sir. 1.0676 0.02938 74 69 5 0
5893 Usually, I don’t dine until the end of the date. But that presentation… 1.0658 0.02863 76 71 5 0
5894 The next course is your second husband, Henry VIII. 1.0656 0.03959 61 58 2 1
5895 Bye George! It’s my husband George. I guess it’s bye George. 1.0641 0.02791 78 73 5 0
5896 I… gotta go. 1.0641 0.02791 78 73 5 0
5897 It’s Ant a le plat, from the chef’s own backyard. 1.0641 0.02791 78 73 5 0
5898 At least it is not from the slaughterhouse 1.0635 0.03097 63 59 4 0
5899 Now that the kids have turned out well… 1.0625 0.03050 64 60 4 0
5900 But sir… I don’t understand. I eat those heads all day long.

Don’t you have something that resembles your head ?

1.0606 0.02960 66 62 4 0
5901 The heels are for desert! 1.0597 0.03609 67 64 2 1
5902 He was ahead of his time. I will miss him. 1.0597 0.02916 67 63 4 0
5903 I can’t eat that, there’s no sauce! 1.0588 0.02875 68 64 4 0
5904 excuse me, but i do believe i ordered the escargot 1.0588 0.02875 68 64 4 0
5905 The sex was great but the relationship just didn 1.0588 0.02875 68 64 4 0
5906 I said smothered chicken, not brother… 1.0580 0.03506 69 66 2 1
5907 Oh goody, you cooked my ex-mate just the way I like it! 1.0571 0.02794 70 66 4 0
5908 It will never take off 1.0556 0.02718 72 68 4 0
5909 Luckily for you, our vegetarian selection is cannibalism friendly. 1.0556 0.02718 72 68 4 0
5910 Don’t worry the chef only uses only the best ingredients 1.0548 0.02682 73 69 4 0
5911 Tender and well-seasoned catch of the day—well done, ma’am. 1.0541 0.02647 74 70 4 0
5912 Oh honey you shouldn’t have 1.0541 0.02647 74 70 4 0
5913 I’m a praying mantis, do I need to pray for my brethren ?? 1.0536 0.03036 56 53 3 0
5914 Via Twitter: Hey y’all! I’m pregnant! 1.0533 0.03229 75 72 2 1
5915 My Queen, this you can not refuse. 1.0526 0.02578 76 72 4 0
5916 yum, yup, yip, mmm, my fellow enemy! 1.0510 0.02234 98 93 5 0
5917 Is this cooked enough? 1.0476 0.02338 84 80 4 0
5918 Nothing says congrats on the divorce like a husband’s honey roasted head! 1.0435 0.02473 69 66 3 0
5919 For a second there, I thought I lost my mind. 1.0395 0.02248 76 73 3 0
5920 This is disgusting, 4 people threw up on your dinner… And on your dessert….. I hate my job. 1.0395 0.02926 76 74 1 1
5921 May I present the Chef’s special. .. And the Chef. 1.0339 0.02376 59 57 2 0
source : https://ontopwiki.com
Category : Finance

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